Related quotes: I told my doctor I...

I told my doctor I get very tired when I go on a diet, so he gave me pep pills. Know what happened? I ate faster.

quote by Joe E. Lewis
Submitted by Silvia Velea
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Related quotes

Grapefruit Diet

Whos that waddlin down the street
Its just me cause I love to eat
Fudge and twinkies and deviled ham
Whos real flabby? yes, I am!
Every picture of mes
Gotta be an aerial view
Now my doctor tells me
Theres just one thing left to do
Grapefruit diet (diet!)
Throw out the pizza and beer
Grapefruit diet (diet!)
Oh, get those jelly donuts out of here
Grapefruit diet (diet!)
Might seem a little sever
Grapefruit diet (diet!)
Im gettin tired of my big fat rear
Blow, fatty!
Well, I used to live on chocolate sauce
Made sumo wrestlers look like kate moss
Walked down an alley and I got stuck
I got more rolls than a pastry truck
When Im all done eating
I eat a little more
When I leave a room
First I gotta grease the door
Grapefruit diet (diet!)
Cant have another eclair
Grapefruit diet (diet!)
I gotta decrease my derriere
Im on a grapefruit diet
Im on a grapefruit diet
Im on a grapefruit diet
No more pie now
No more creme brulee
Lay off the gravy
And souffle
No french fri-yi-yies now
No ice cream parfait
Mr. cheese nacho
Stay away
Oh I think Id sell my soul
For a triple patty melt
But I need a boomerang
When I put on my belt
Grapefruit diet (diet!)
Lay off the 3 musketeers
Grapefruit diet (diet!)
Until my big booty disappears
Grapefruit diet (diet!)
Eat em till theyre comin out of my ears
Grapefruit diet (diet!)
cause I havent seen my feet in years
Im on a grapefruit diet
Im on a grapefruit diet
Im on a grapefruit diet
I think Im about ready for a quarter pounder with extra cheese
I need a side order of onion rings
And dont forget to super-size that

song performed by by Weird Al Yankovic
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Conversations Angels And Demons (Part Four)

standing in the middle of a parking
lot, talking to an old man...

he said: 'i've never seen it
this bad... everybody on edge,
struggling, scared...
nobody knows what's going to
happen...
and hell, half of everybody you
meet, or more, taking them damn
pills...'

'yea, they come in here all the
time, middle of the day, whacked out...'

'pills and poverty go together... you
cant make it, cant stand the pressure,
they prescribe you the pills.'

'i think the medical profession got it
started, and it's mushroomed... into
some kind of evil disease.'

'i know a man, worked with him for twenty
years... him and his wife used to come over
and eat with us, play cards... they were
like family.
him and her got to having problems, he started
beating her... found out he was on the pills.'

'what happened to them? '

'well, he lost his job. they lost the house,
pretty much all they had. she left him. he tried
to kill her, but the law stopped him.
i tried to talk to him the other day. he told
me 'he couldnt live without her'...
i told him, 'no, he couldnt live without the
pills'...
tried to talk him into getting some help...
but he wouldnt listen...'

'yea, it's tough. you cant help somebody
that wont admit they need help... the woman
all right? '

'she's working, trying to start over... it's
hard for her...'

i shook his hand, and walked away. pills...
another weapon of ignorance!

poem by Eric Cockrell
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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The best doctors in the world are Doctor Diet, Doctor Quiet, and Doctor Merryman.

quote by Jonathan Swift
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Quick Fix

Don't need no doctor, don't need no pills
Nothing it gives me's gonna cure my ills
I've got it bad baby and that ain't no lie
There ain't no vaccine for what I've got
Your kind of poison it don't come in a shot
It's just a cravin' baby that I can't deny
I've been tearin' up the town slammin' whiskey down
Ain't nothing but the real thing gonna do...no
There ain't no quick fix for you.
Babe...Lawd...There ain't no quick fix
You drive me crazy baby with those eyes
When you walked in the room you hit me broadside
Its a little past midnight
How blue can you get?
No matter how I try to drink this county dry
There really ain't no substitute....no
I need a quick fix for you
There ain't no easy answer
There ain't no miracle cure
I told the doctor what I needed
He said you better just run to her
Don't need no doctor, don't need no pills
Nothing it gives me gonna cure my ills
Well, no matter how I try to drink this county dry
There really ain't no substitute...no.
There ain't no quick fix for you
There ain't no quick fix.

song performed by by 38 Special
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Life In The Fast Line

He was a hard headed man
He was brutally handsome and she was teminally pretty
She held him up and he held her for ransome in the heart
of the cold cold city
He had a nasty reputation as a cruel dude
They said he was ruthless they said he was crude
They had one thing in common they were
good in bed
She'd say 'Faster faster. The lights are turnin' red."
Life in the fast lane
Surely make you lose your mind, mm
Are you with me so far?
Eager for action and bot for the game
The coming attraction, the drop of a name
They knew all the right people, they took
all the right pills
They threw outrageous parties, they paid heavily bills.
There were lines on the mirror, lines on her face
She pretended not to notice, she was caught up
in the race
Out every evening, until it was light
He was too tired to make it, she was too tired
to fight about it
Life in the fast lane
Surely make you lse your mind
Life in the fast lane, everything all the time
Life in the fast lane, uh huh
Blowin' and burnin', blinded by thirst
They didn't see the stop sign,
took a turn for the worst.
She said, "Listen, baby.You can hear the engine
ring.We've been up and down this highway;
haven't seen a goddam thing."
He said,"Call the doctor. I think I'm gonna crash."
"The doctor say he's comin', but you gotta pay him cash."
They went rushin' down that freeway, messed around
and got lost
They didn't know they were just dyin' to get off
And it was life in the fast lane
Life in the fast lane

song performed by by Eagles
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Doctor, Doctor

Doctor, theres something wrong with me
My health is not all that it used to be
My heart is out of beat, I got chokers on my feet
My eyesights getting dimmer, I cant see
Doctor thanks for seeing me today, Im glad,
Ive got every sickness there is to be had
I had whooping cough last month
And today Ive got the mumps
And tomorrow Ill catch chicken pox as well.
Doctor doctor doctor make me well
Ive not got long to go now I can tell
Doctor doctor doctor make me well
Ive not got long to go I can tell
Ive not got long to go I can tell
Those pills I took have no effect at all
Just the other day I had a nasty fall
And I think I broke my jaw when it hit the kitchen floor
And Im shrinking last week I was five foot four
Ive been getting shivers lately, is it flu?
I know the bug is going round, what can I do?
Its about to pick on me, Ive still got the other three
Do you think I caught smallpox Id get flu?
[chorus]
Do you think its time that I made out my will?
Ill leave everything to you to pay my bill
Just how long is there to go
Please tell me I want to know
But on second thoughts dont tell me, Im too ill.

song performed by by Who
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Pain Pills

I took too many pain pills
To see what it would do
I took too many pain pills
Now i'm thinking about you

I took too many pain pills
My body's shutting down
I took too many pain pills
I'm lying on the ground

I took too many pain pills
I'm wishing you were here
I took too many pain pills
My death is drawing near

I took too many pain pills
It's messing with my head
I took too many pain pills......

And I think i'm finnaly dead....

poem by Jessi lucas
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Pills.......[SHORT; Medical; Personal; Humor? ]

please see below:

keep going:

you are almost there!

if i really 'need' them i really don't mind pills,
but i'd rather walk and eat to keep at bay my ills.
by 'eat' i mean oats, and apples, and other healthy stuff.
a brisk thirty-minute walk a day isn't very tough.

i'm here at the drugstore, my blood pressure to take.
i hope to quit b/p med, to my life more simple make.
i think i can do it (if i keep up my walking) ,
be prescription-free, and keep on kicking and talking.

i quit my daily blood pressure med a week ago.
my readings are higher but, i think, still good to go.
if ‘doc' doesn't mind me being ‘prehypertensive',
i'll skip the prescription though it is not expensive.

a year ago i took ‘cholesterol med' for a day.
then my new doctor and i agreed to try another way
to improve my lab results with diet for a year, ……
eating nuts, and flax seed oil capsules from my dear.

a year's gone by and soon cholesterol i'll check,
with luck live a few more years, and not die a total wreck.
life's a drag enough sometimes, without being ill.
perhaps i can make it without a prescription pill.

? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?
on second thought… it's not simple not taking pills
IF i have to walk and diet to keep away my ills.

a super colossal MAGICAL pill i would surely take
if then i needn't exercise……. and EVERYDAY i could eat my cake.

(2010)

poem by Bri Edwards
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Purple Pill Palarver

I take my little purple pills each morning and each night.
My Doctor says I need them and he thinks that he is right.
But I don't really think i need them I just wanted you to know
I take 'em, 'cause I like 'em and they really make me go...

They make me hop and skip and jump and do the things I please.
They make me walk on water and talk to birds and trees.
I love my little purple pills and what they do for me.
They fill me with the feeling of pure ecstasy...

Though I'm really not addicted I can stop 'em if I must
But why take drastic measures my purple pills I trust
My Doctor called me in last week and said 'You'll have to stop.'
But I jumped up on his shiny desk in one tremendous hop.

I said 'Listen you old geezer, and listen very close.
You write a script out here and now and double up me dose.
Try to think about the suffering, try to think about the pain,
When my fingers wrap around ya' throat and strangle off your brain.'

I love my little purple pills and what they do for me.
They keep me calm and regular as you can plainly see.
If my Doctors say they're needed then who am I to doubt them.
But I'm really not addicted I just can't seem to live without 'em.

poem by Bridgid Patrick
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Pills for Pain. Blood for hurt

How much can a person endure
Before realising pills make the pain stop
They numb all feeling and leave you cold
Cold and dead inside
Pills for pain blood for hurt

It trickles slowly out
The harder you push the faster the hurt escapes
How can a person hurt themselves
When all they do is hurt
When you hurt emotionally physically is easier
Pills for pain blood for hurt

To be nobody to no one
To be unloved and unknown
I am know by the pills
They know me
They make me a someone
Pills for pain blood for hurt

To have a heart broken
Shattered and screaming for less hurt
To feel so much love and the next day non
Pills for pain blood for hurt

Love leads to pain
Caring leads to hurt
Pills for pain
Blood for hurt
Nobody to save me

poem by Maxine Isherwood
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Resistor

You are being taken under our power to your destination
Go!
Everybody, is a part of the whole of the system
Faster, faster, to welcome disaster
Faster, faster, to welcome disaster
Everybody, is a part...
Faster, faster, to welcome disaster
Faster, faster, to welcome disaster
Faster, faster, to welcome disaster
Faster, faster, to welcome disaster
To welcome disaster (repeat - fade)
Everybody
Everybody is a part of the whole of the system
Faster, faster, to welcome disaster
Faster, faster, to welcome disaster
Everybody
Hey! Hey!
Everybody, is a part...
Hey! Hey!
Were all here on this planet
To spend a couple of hundred thousand hours
To find out
Where we came from
Where we go, and what our souls are all about
Go!
Faster, faster, to welcome disaster
Faster, faster, to welcome disaster
Faster, faster, to welcome disaster
Faster, faster, to welcome disaster
Everybody
Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey!
Everybody, is a part...
Hey! Hey! Hey!
Everybody
Everybody, is a part...
Faster, faster, to welcome disaster
Faster, faster, to welcome disaster
Everybody, is a part of the whole of the system
Faster, faster, to welcome disaster
Faster, faster, to welcome disaster

song performed by by Yello
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Resistor

song performed by by Yello
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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If my doctor told me I had only six minutes to live, I wouldn't brood. I'd type a little faster.

quote by Isaac Asimov
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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What A Crazy World

What a crazy world we live in,
and you can say that again.
For when we open up, ours mouths
sometimes the words we say,
just come out all wrong.

A Scottish friend of my wife
went to see the Doctor
as her pregnancy was over due.
The Doctor told her
he would give it another week
and then he would have to induce her.

When she went, home
and her husband asked how it went.
What she said next must
have come as a big surprise.
The Doctor said if I haven’t had it
in another week,
he was going to seduce me.

Another friend of Vera’s
went to the Doctor one day.
He asked, have you come on your cycle?
She quickly replied,
no my husband brought me in his car.

Vera must be learning from them.
When we were engaged,
my mother gave her
a large bunch of peonies.
She went to work the next day
and told all her friends about the flowers.

She then wondered why
they were curled up with laughter.
She told them about the flowers OK,
but her tongue couldn’t get a grip on peonies
and something else came out instead.

What a crazy world we live in
and I wouldn’t change it in anyway.

21 February 2008

poem by David Harris
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Sorry I Never

im missing the good old days
where i sat alone in my room
where the darkness fades under my eyes
and i needed much more sleep
im sorry i gave to many reasons and escapes
im sorry i was too tired to be awake
im sorry i never told how i truly felt
in truth we never ever really began

which is to say
that day when i told you i died
were you even listening
my life was just a sleeping pill
that i was fighting, fighting away
im sorry i gave to many reasons and escapes
im sorry i was too tired to be awake
im sorry i never lived spontaneously
in truth i never really went anywhere at all

so im missing the good old days
though i never even learned how to play
i took life to seriously
i never dreamed; i needed much more sleep
im sorry i gave to many reasons and escapes
im sorry i was too tired to be awake
im sorry i never trusted you
in truth i never even trusted myself
im sorry i gave to many reasons and escapes
im sorry i was too tired to be awake
im sorry i never told how i truly felt
in truth we never ever really began

poem by Sarah Cotnam
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Be A Nice Baby Boy

Mom`s eyes was looking strange
Something was so cruel in her eyes
Mom made baby sleep
She whispered Hush now baby baby don`t you cry
Baby was boy he was staring at mom`s face and hands (breasts) with his black circle eyes
He was full of an unknown feeling
He didn`t know what was that but he knew it was
Moving inside his body
And looking his mom made it awaked
Baby felt a pleasure
Mom was clothing a white dress
She was a nurse
She knew all the medicines effects very well
She gave baby some sweet liquid
At once he fell into a so deepest asleep

Boy got up
It was 12 p.m.
He rush to the bathroom
Look at his eyes on the mirror
He open his eyes with trouble
He feels his head and eyes are so heavy
He spends all his time sleeping in the bed like a child
He is angry because he is always late
All the day he feels sleepy even when he get up from the sleeping
He is even tired when he is spending time with his girlfriend
His problem is that he feels senseless, tired and angry
I see night mares all the time
I take too much sleep I should go to the doctor
Mom asks: where are you going baby?
Boy says: mom I am not a child any more you are frustrating me with your questions and I am so tired

'You are always my baby,
I don`t know what`s going to my child,
This world is making him apart from me,
I think he is captured by a devil`s power,
He always wants to keep his room`s door closed,
He is going to make something hidden from my eye,
He talks to a girl through the phone,
But he is clean,
He helps to every people that never get to know,
He is so kind sympathized'.

Mom makes some mixed of pills
Solve it into a liquid:
I`m protecting you my son, '
You are only a child you can not protect from yourself,
I am making life more safe for you,
These pills will sleep some one for 24 hours,
Doctor gave them to the mothers after giving a birth,
For feeling less pain and sleep,
I will give it to you for sleeping and making the time of your day short,
You will not be suffered any more with visiting a girl and making conversation with her,
You will sleep all the day,
You will dream of making love,
Your feeling will be satisfied during your dream,
Just like the first time'

Mom is sitting near her son looking at him,
Touching his body caress his face
He is deeply sleeping
Mom whispers: Hush now baby baby don`t you cry
Be clean and healthy
Keep sleeping here
I love you.

poem by Sepideh Mehrsa
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Pain-Free

Teenage girl, seventeen years of age.
Tired of making stupid mistakes.
Tired of being put down.
All she wants to do is be happy.
And make her family proud.
She's locked herself in her room.
Her only safe haven.
Wondering what it would be like if she was never born.
Her mind a jumbled mess.
Tired of the constant scorn.
Tired of regret.
Tired of causing it on her family.
She looks at herself in the mirror.
And a stupid girl stares back at her.
Telling her: 'you're worthless all you do is cause pain, your ugly, annoying and weird you don't deserve to live! '
She sees the pills staring back at her.
Inviting her to be pain-free.
Telling her that all her pain and problems will go away.
She takes the pills and knows she will inflict no more pain on her family, friends, and herself.

poem by Francesca Marie
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Shouldn't A Told You That

Well he told me that he was tired of being good
And he told me that she don't treat him like she should
Well he told me when he'd be alone he told me how long she'd be gone
I'm only human
He shouldn't-a told me that
Well she told me that her man was really fine
Makes her sorry that she doesn't have more time
Well she laughed and told me how she gets a little bit just now and then
I'm only human
She shouldn't-a told me that
My doctor tells me I should get more exercise
My friends tell me to be alone is so unwise
I'm being good but I don't know for how long
Temptation is comin' on strong
Well I told you that I saw him yesterday
Very sexy, more than that I cannot say
And just before I said goodbye I told him with a little sigh
I'm only human
I shouldn't-a told him that
My doctor tells me I should get more exercise
My friends tell me to be alone is so unwise
I'm being good but I don't know for how long
Temptation is comin' on strong
Well I told you that I saw him yesterday
Very sexy, more than that I cannot say
And just before I said goodbye I told him with a little sigh
I'm only human
I shouldn't-a told him that

song performed by by Dixie Chicks
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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At the age of 16, something happened with my finger and the doctor told me, you never can be a organist or pianist, so think about what you do with music.

quote by Kurt Masur
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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High Cholesterol

I've got high cholesterol,
my doctor diagnosed it.
According to the doctor
my bad fats overflowing.

I was a tad perplexed
and thought that I'd been hexed
'I'm on a low fat diet,
that's fruit and veg, ' I said.

'Ah', said he, 'that's ‘cause,
your mum and dad designed ya.
It's in the genes you know
but don't let science blind ya'

I took my jeans right off
and looked right down each leg.
Well I'm not dumb I tell ya,
now I wear skirts instead.

poem by Ruth Walters
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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En.Citatepedia®.ro

Related quotes

Grapefruit Diet

Conversations Angels And Demons (Part Four)

Quick Fix

Life In The Fast Line

Doctor, Doctor

Pain Pills

Pills.......[SHORT; Medical; Personal; Humor? ]

Purple Pill Palarver

Pills for Pain. Blood for hurt

Resistor

Resistor

What A Crazy World

Sorry I Never

Be A Nice Baby Boy

Pain-Free

Shouldn't A Told You That

High Cholesterol

En.Citatepedia^®.ro