If my doctor told me I had only six minutes to live, I wouldn't brood. I'd type a little faster.
quote by Isaac Asimov
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Related quotes
What A Crazy World
What a crazy world we live in,
and you can say that again.
For when we open up, ours mouths
sometimes the words we say,
just come out all wrong.
A Scottish friend of my wife
went to see the Doctor
as her pregnancy was over due.
The Doctor told her
he would give it another week
and then he would have to induce her.
When she went, home
and her husband asked how it went.
What she said next must
have come as a big surprise.
The Doctor said if I haven’t had it
in another week,
he was going to seduce me.
Another friend of Vera’s
went to the Doctor one day.
He asked, have you come on your cycle?
She quickly replied,
no my husband brought me in his car.
Vera must be learning from them.
When we were engaged,
my mother gave her
a large bunch of peonies.
She went to work the next day
and told all her friends about the flowers.
She then wondered why
they were curled up with laughter.
She told them about the flowers OK,
but her tongue couldn’t get a grip on peonies
and something else came out instead.
What a crazy world we live in
and I wouldn’t change it in anyway.
21 February 2008
poem by David Harris
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Reel Around The Fountain
It's time the tale was told
of how you took a child
and you made him old
Reel around the fountain
slap me on the patio
I'll take it now
Fifteen minutes with you
well, I wouldn't say no
people said that you were virtually dead
and they were so wrong
fifteen minutes with you
well, i wouldn't say no
people said that you were easily led
and they were half-right
I dreamt about you last night
and i fell out of bed twice
you can pin and mount me like a butterfly
but take me to the haven of your bed
was something that you never said
two lumps, please
you're the bee's knees
but so am I
Meet me at the fountain
shove me on the patio
I'll take it slowly
Fifteen minutes with you
oh I wouldn't say no
people see no worth in you
oh but I do
song performed by by Smiths
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Resistor
You are being taken under our power to your destination
Go!
Everybody, is a part of the whole of the system
Faster, faster, to welcome disaster
Faster, faster, to welcome disaster
Everybody, is a part...
Faster, faster, to welcome disaster
Faster, faster, to welcome disaster
Faster, faster, to welcome disaster
Faster, faster, to welcome disaster
To welcome disaster (repeat - fade)
Everybody
Everybody is a part of the whole of the system
Faster, faster, to welcome disaster
Faster, faster, to welcome disaster
Everybody
Hey! Hey!
Everybody, is a part...
Hey! Hey!
Were all here on this planet
To spend a couple of hundred thousand hours
To find out
Where we came from
Where we go, and what our souls are all about
Go!
Faster, faster, to welcome disaster
Faster, faster, to welcome disaster
Faster, faster, to welcome disaster
Faster, faster, to welcome disaster
Everybody
Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey!
Everybody, is a part...
Hey! Hey! Hey!
Everybody
Everybody, is a part...
Faster, faster, to welcome disaster
Faster, faster, to welcome disaster
Everybody, is a part of the whole of the system
Faster, faster, to welcome disaster
Faster, faster, to welcome disaster
song performed by by Yello
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Resistor
You are being taken under our power to your destination
Go!
Everybody, is a part of the whole of the system
Faster, faster, to welcome disaster
Faster, faster, to welcome disaster
Everybody, is a part...
Faster, faster, to welcome disaster
Faster, faster, to welcome disaster
Faster, faster, to welcome disaster
Faster, faster, to welcome disaster
To welcome disaster (repeat - fade)
Everybody
Everybody is a part of the whole of the system
Faster, faster, to welcome disaster
Faster, faster, to welcome disaster
Everybody
Hey! Hey!
Everybody, is a part...
Hey! Hey!
Were all here on this planet
To spend a couple of hundred thousand hours
To find out
Where we came from
Where we go, and what our souls are all about
Go!
Faster, faster, to welcome disaster
Faster, faster, to welcome disaster
Faster, faster, to welcome disaster
Faster, faster, to welcome disaster
Everybody
Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey!
Everybody, is a part...
Hey! Hey! Hey!
Everybody
Everybody, is a part...
Faster, faster, to welcome disaster
Faster, faster, to welcome disaster
Everybody, is a part of the whole of the system
Faster, faster, to welcome disaster
Faster, faster, to welcome disaster
song performed by by Yello
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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I told my doctor I get very tired when I go on a diet, so he gave me pep pills. Know what happened? I ate faster.
quote by Joe E. Lewis
Submitted by Silvia Velea
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All In A Day's Work
When I was born
The doctor said
There's something wrong
Inside that baby head
When I was a boy
In Sunday school
I told them all
That they were fools
All in a day's work
To live and breathe
A sight to see
And so it goes
I went into
The fortune teller's
She wouldn't read
My horoscope
I go into
The laundromat
The people all
Buy extra soap
All in a day's work
To live and breathe
A sight to see
All in a day's work
To live and breathe
A sight to see
song performed by by Eels
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Choose To Be
Not gonna keep up my guard to prove I'm hard
or put on some act to earn your respect
cause that's not the type of life I want to live
and that's not the type of energy I want to give
I guess I'm not cool according to you
for having some friends who don't seem to fit in
well that's not the type of life I want to live
and that's not the type of energy I want to give
I guess you don't see cause you seem to be
real tough but living in misery
well that's not the type of life I want to live
and that's not the type of energy I want to give
song performed by by Youth Of Today
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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What Type Of Man
What kind of a man goes after a married woman
What kind of a man does it and proclaims his faith in GOD
What kind of man does the things that he shouldn't
Does that type of man think that he will never be caught.
What type of man leaves his children and his wife
What type of man puts his needs and his wants first
What type of a man is scared to fight his own fights
Does that type of man cares whose soul that he hurts.
What type of man talks behind other peoples backs
What type of man lies to make himself look tall in front of others
What type of man is scared to admit the guilt that he has done
Does that type of man think that we are his brothers.
What type of man will not work for a living
What type of man wants others to take care of him
What type of man thinks he is something but he's not
Does that type of man thinks that manhood is his friend.
What type of man cannot be used as an example
What type of man does not keep promises that he's made
What type of man should not be father to any child
Does that type of man know the price that a real man has paid.
What type of man thinks but he cannot think
What type of man looks but he truly does not see
What type of man hears but he does not listen
Does that type of man know that he could never be me.
Randy L. McClave
poem by Randy McClave
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Your Heart With Your Mind and Faith Is Your Doctor!
Some say they would share this if they could.
They can not.
And wouldn't...
IF they could.
Some say they can feel yours!
They can not.
And wouldn't...
IF they could.
Some say they understand.
And if there is anything they can do,
To let them know!
Sincerety like this is difficult to dismiss.
But pain is personalized.
And not quite felt,
Like the one who is feeling it!
Some may empathize, cry and hold your hand.
Rub it.
Or give a hug to pat a back!
It's a fact of your condition.
You are there without a physician.
However,
When your pain comes...
Attaching your heart, body and mind to it?
There is no question who it belongs to!
But what more can a human being being human do?
Some say they would share this if they could.
They can not.
And wouldn't...
IF they could.
Some say they can feel yours!
They can not.
And wouldn't...
IF they could.
Some say they understand.
And if there is anything they can do,
To let them know!
Sincerety like this is difficult to dismiss.
But pain is personalized.
And not quite felt,
Like the one who is feeling it!
And when you are feeling yours...
You know it can not be felt,
Like it has you feeling it!
And somehow you know,
It is there not to be shared!
No matter who, what and how it is perceived.
Only you know 'why' pain feels like it does!
It is yours and it has been received.
And only you can create that feeling to make it heal!
You know it is there and that reality has no appeal.
Your heart with your mind and faith is your doctor!
Your heart with your mind and faith is your doctor!
Your heart with your mind and faith is your doctor!
Faith is your doctor!
Faith is your doctor!
Faith is your doctor!
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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A Matter of Trust on a Summer's Day
Jane's mother said
she was up by the church
and so you went up
the path leading
to the church of St Mary
and there she was
laying some flowers
on a gravestone
she looked up
as you approached
and smiled
your mother told me
you were here
you said
I think Mother
must like you
she wouldn't
have told you
otherwise
Jane said
getting up
from the graveside
and brushing her hands
on her summery dress
who are the flowers for?
you asked
looking at the flowers
placed in a small jar
on the grave
a parishioner
we used to know
who used to like
this type of flower
oh I see
you said
looking at the graves around
and the Downs further back
and the trees nearby
where did you want to go?
you asked
how about a walk to Cocking?
we can do some shopping
while we're there
and enjoy each other's
company in the process
is it far? you asked
a mile or so
she replied
ok
you said
and you followed her
down the path
and along the lane
to her house
and you waited outside
while she went inside
after a few minutes
her mother came out
with her and said
it's very good of you
to go with Jane
all that way
I wouldn't like her
to go alone
that's all right
you said
and she smiled
and went in side
and Jane said
see she trusts you
not many boys
around here
she'd say that to
oh right
you said
looking at
her dark hair
and her eyes
gazing at you
and her hand
holding a shopping bag
and her lips
breaking into a smile
come on
she said and
so she took
your hand
and you walked
along the lane
keeping close
to the hedgerow
the sun warm
and the sky blue
and you sensed a joy
of it being
just her and you.
poem by Terry Collett
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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I type even faster than I talk. I'm very proud of that. I type so fast. And I have to because the characters are living in real time and I've got to keep up with them. It's a miracle they even give me a royalty.
quote by Rupert Holmes
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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The Hand That Feeds
Doctor, doctor, doctor
Please, doctor, doctor, please
Doctor, doctor, doctor
Feel like an old diseace
Get your sweet ass off the floor
Doctor, doctor, doctor
I cant refuse any loose harted lady anymore
I scream your name into the crowd
You feel the flame, but yo aint proud
Mabye your attitude aint right
So all thats left for me to do is bite
The hand that feeds me
Feeds me
Doctor, doctor, doctor
Doctor, doctor, please
All things you put me through
What the hell you want me to
Do all the things that uncle john needs
I aint the dog that bites the hand that feeds me
In the middle of, with a spittle of
Et tu like birds of a feather
When another day, love another way
Push, shove, make love, play
Never never, never ever
Never ever, never ever
Na, na...
Doctor, doctor, doctor
Please do a-what you can
Doctor, doctor, doctor
Would you please give my life a hand
All the things you put me trough
What the hell you want me to
Do all the things that uncle john needs
I aint the dog that bites the hand that feeds me, yeah
Doctor, doctor, doctor
Doctor, doctor, please
(repeat)
song performed by by Aerosmith
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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1985 Food Medley - 02 - Doctor
[parody of doctor! doctor! by the thompson twins]
Woah, cause hes my doctor, doctor,
And his name is bernie, bernie.
Oh, doctor, doctor,
Im feelin pretty dismal.
Doctor, doctor,
And his name is bernie, bernie.
Oh, doctor, doctor,
Wheres my pepto bismol?
song performed by by Weird Al Yankovic
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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I'll Never See You As Cupid
10 minutes.
5 minutes.
No minutes of my time,
To
Waste my priorities.
Just to start an argument,
To please that need.
1 minute
2 minutes
No minutes will I find,
To
Let you mess around with me.
Trying to destroy my every bit of peace.
You're not gonna rock my boat,
I float on peaceful waters.
No.
Your envy and that jealousy...
Will not get again that close to me.
1 minute
2 minutes
No minutes will I find,
To
Let you mess around with me.
Trying to destroy my every bit of peace.
You're not gonna rock my boat,
I float on peaceful waters.
No.
Your envy and that jealousy...
Will not get again that close to me.
You can swing back and forth on a rope,
To get me to notice your show.
But that swinging that you're doing is a childish thing.
And bringing much attention to a fool,
Who
Only broods...
In 'stupid'!
10 minutes.
5 minutes.
No minutes of my time,
To
Waste my priorities.
Just to start an argument,
To please that need.
And...
Whatever you do,
I'll never see you as cupid.
You brood too much,
Like a fool who's doin' stupid!
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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If You Wouldn't Be My Lady
Take away the song a songbird sings
Take away the sound that laughter brings
Take the music from a melody
Never take your love away from me
You make me smile
You make darkness turn into warm sunshine
You give me love
The Lord above knows
I wouldn't know what to do if you wouldn't be my lady
I wouldn't know what to do if you weren't here today
I wouldn't know what to do if you wouldn't be my lady
I wouldn't know what to do if you weren't here to stay
Take away the gentle summer breeze
Take away the golden autumn leaves
I can live without blue skies above
But I could never live without your love
You give me life
You make bad times turn into the good times
You give me love
The Lord above knows
I wouldn't know what to do if you wouldn't be my lady
I wouldn't know what to do if you weren't here to stay
I wouldn't know what to do if you wouldn't be my lady
I wouldn't know what to do if you weren't here to stay
I wouldn't know what to do if you wouldn't be my lady
I wouldn't know what to do if you weren't here today
I wouldn't know what to do if you wouldn't be my lady
song performed by by Charlie Rich, lyrics by Jimmy Holiday & Eddie Reeves from Behind Closed Doors (1973)
Submitted by Jeffrey Kosloske
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Doctor’s Day,2010
Doctor, doctor, carer of sick!
Doctor, doctor, healer on earth;
Doctor, doctor, noble is thine field;
Doctor, doctor, serve thine brethren well!
Doctor, labor all the more;
Clean and dress the chronic sore;
Let no person taint thine name;
Never forget thine great aim.
Doctor, let not wealth allure;
Doctor, lead a life all pure;
Doctor, try to always cure;
God will bless thee on earth, sure.
Dear Dr.B, K, Padmavathi M.D.,
‘Happy Doctor’s Day,2010! ’
From the Dean and staff of IRT, PMC
Copyright by Dr John Celes 7-1-2010
poem by John Celes
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Wouldn't Want Your Love (Any Other Way)
(myles goodwyn/jim clench)
Published by slalom publishing co. - bmi
Lying in the sunshine, i feel like gettin' high
And taking a sip of cool wine, reflection in your eyes
A face i know as someone, who smiles and make me say
That i wouldn't want your love any other way
You're makin' my days feel empty
You're makin' my nights feel full
I wonder where i'm goin', it all depends on you
You give me all i am, now what can i give to you
Cause i wouldn't want your love any other way
You know i wouldn't want your love
How could i live without your love
You know i wouldn't want your love any other way
Lying in the moonlight, i feel like comin' down
Sometimes i feel so lonely, seems like i go around
And i can't hear you breathing, i see within the sounds
Cause i wouldn't want your love
How could i live without your love
You know i wouldn't want your love any other way
You know i wouldn't want your love
How could i live without your love
You know i wouldn't want your love any other way
Any other way, any other way
song performed by by April Wine
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Wouldn't Want Your Love
(myles goodwyn/jim clench)
Published by slalom publishing co. - bmi
Lying in the sunshine, i feel like gettin' high
And taking a sip of cool wine, reflection in your eyes
A face i know as someone, who smiles and make me say
That i wouldn't want your love any other way
You're makin' my days feel empty
You're makin' my nights feel full
I wonder where i'm goin', it all depends on you
You give me all i am, now what can i give to you
Cause i wouldn't want your love any other way
You know i wouldn't want your love
How could i live without your love
You know i wouldn't want your love any other way
Lying in the moonlight, i feel like comin' down
Sometimes i feel so lonely, seems like i go around
And i can't hear you breathing, i see within the sounds
Cause i wouldn't want your love
How could i live without your love
You know i wouldn't want your love any other way
You know i wouldn't want your love
How could i live without your love
You know i wouldn't want your love any other way
Any other way, any other way
song performed by by April Wine
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Spark And Cindy
Spark and Cindy live by their own means
They wouldn't have if I'd only known where they'd been
And I want to make things a part of my life
And I want to see that things are going to be right
But if you can't even stand on your feet
And if you don't own the air that you breathe
Then it's not for me to say
But I wouldn't live that way
And I wouldn't stand apart
And I wouldn't find the real
and I wouldn't play a part
And I wouldn't find in love
So misguided by some fool
And just what I'm trying trying to say
Makes my head spin round the room
(Repeat from 3rd line onwards)
song performed by by Ocean Colour Scene
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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All Up
Spark and Cindy live by their own means
They wouldn't have if I only
know'd where they'd been
And I want to make things a part of my life
And I want to see that
things are going to be right
But if you can't even
stand on your feet
And if you don't own the
air that you breathe
Then it's not for me to say
But I wouldn't live that way
and I wouldn't stand apart
And I wouldn't find the real
and I wouldn't play a part
And I wouldn't find in love
so misguided by some fool
And just what I'm trying t say
makes my head spin round the room
(Repeat from 3rd line onwards)
song performed by by Ocean Colour Scene
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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