I Owe You A Depth Of Gratitude
Remember...
They are there to represent 'your' interests.
Your standards.
Your way of life.
Your depiction of normalcy.
And from what I've seen...
Your decision to label me an outcast?
Brings a comfort to my consciousness.
At least I now know,
Those ambitions I had wishing to fit in...
Have been saved by your acknowledgement,
That I didn't.
I owe you a depth of gratitude.
But I will admit,
I did have my doubts for a very long time.
And a not fitting in...
Is today,
The least of my concerns.
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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The Best Of Images That Represent
Expensive is the ongoing investment made,
In ignorance.
No longer is it cost effective,
Deciding who sees and who stays blind.
Or the act to praise some with an uplifting done,
While leaving others behind.
Who made the decision,
To choose those to represent high ideals?
Who made the decision,
Selected standards and values...
Would be the best etiquette?
Who decided to mess up everything like this?
And who self righteous,
Will ever admit...
Something has gone terribly wrong,
In their insistence persisted...
Of this permitted existence.
Expensive is the ongoing investment made,
In ignorance.
No longer is it cost effective,
Deciding who sees and who stays blind.
Or the act to praise some with an uplifting done,
While leaving others behind.
Who made the decision,
To choose those to represent high ideals?
Who made the decision,
Selected standards and values...
Would be the best etiquette?
Who decided to mess up everything like this?
And please,
Don't let it be...
The act of illegal aliens.
Or those homeless and hungry,
Pleading on their knees.
Wishing to give the best of images that represent,
The quality of life and those highlights of a great society.
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
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Did You Just Have A Wish To Sit
I know you are making the attempt,
To have one man held accountable...
For all of your headaches,
Since the event of your birth.
However...
At least admit,
There was some kind of consciousness...
You remember,
Before he 'agreed' to achieve,
The impossible.
With you rolling up your sleeves...
Helping to rid your life of your own debris.
And...
I believe this was to be done with your assistance.
Have you abandoned that acknowledgement as well?
Or did you just have a wish to sit in comfort as accustomed?
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
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No. Of Course Not
They are right.
Standards and values have been ruined.
A quality of life has been slipping down the drain.
Nothing depicted as a wholesomeness,
No longer exists.
Nothing of it seems to remain.
And those elected to represent their interests...
Seem to have turned their backs on this.
And yet this acknowledgement...
Appeared from nowhere overnight.
Who possibly could be held accountable,
For keeping so many blinded and totally unaware?
Could it be...
The lust for greed and the various varieties of it?
No.
Of course not.
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
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As the Caretakers of 'Your' Interests
Ladies and gentlemen...
It has come to our attention,
Many of you are homeless and starving.
And those of you who are not...
Are close to those experiences.
However...
We wish to inform you,
As the caretakers of 'your' interests...
And well being,
We...
Those you have elected to keep you,
From hitting rock bottom and hitting brick walls...
Are doing our utmost best to impress you,
With the acknowledgement...
That our concerns are 'your' concerns.
And...
Rest assured,
We are 'not' just maintaining those impressions!
But,
We are also...
Spending sleepless hours,
Ensuring our imitation of leaders...
Best represent your expectations!
So until further notice...
Please allow our performances to continue,
With your endorsements.
That alone,
Will help us succeed in keeping your beliefs alive.
Keep in mind...
None of this would exist without your support.
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
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The Am I Nuts Test
Before taking The Am I Nuts Test,
Do your best to be objective and prepared...
To declare 'yourself',
As crazy as a bed bug!
Why declare this?
It will be easier to take the test,
With the acknowledgement...
There had been someone who picked on a bed bug,
To proclaim and announce it crazy.
Okay?
Now you should feel open to accept,
All possibilities.
First...
Have you ever discovered yourself quick to deny,
Anything?
Think about this and be honest.
Second...
Are you afraid to be critiqued?
For any physical flaws and blemishes you keep?
Third...
Do you seek to mask your insecurities?
With a pointing out those of others...
As you desperately try to secretly hide,
Those of your own that are hidden deep?
Fourth...
Do you get up each morning,
With wishes to find someone to impress.
Without first expressing a thankfulness for your blessings?
Do you find a need to rehearse this first?
Fifth...
Are you envious and jealous,
Of those addressing with confidence their identities?
Does this irritate you to no end?
And you are convinced,
They actually are trying to run away...
From their strange and differentness.
Do you feel people like this pretend?
And you remain one of the few...
Who advocate a 'normalcy' wishing others to approve?
Well...
You 'are' nuts!
And there is no need to have the results discussed.
If you believe others are out of their minds,
With a few like you being 'normal'.
And no evidence around you to validate and find.
You 'are' nuts and out of your mind.
No one today is normal.
'What makes you qualified to administer a test like this? '
Long ago I was confirmed as being dysfunctional.
And I resisted this refusing to admit it.
But today those dysfunctional,
Seem to be the ones left who have common sense.
'So...
You too are nuts? '
No.
My preference is to stay,
As dysfunctional for as long as I can.
I find to admit it makes me more marketable.
To discover someone is nuts,
Puts a limit to their opportunities.
And...
To debate with someone about the mentalities of bed bugs,
Is way out of my league.
I enjoy my life lived as simple as possible.
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
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Decay to Rust, Dust And Fade
I am not here to compete with dead poets.
Or those with pseudo ambitions,
To foster claims this is what they do.
My depictions are alive,
To represent times lived today.
I wear no mask to imitate,
Those from a past who have passed away.
This is two thousand and twelve!
Not the seventeen hundreds.
Although there are many,
Wishing these times to return.
The landscape today,
Has more censors and critics...
Desiring the past for them will stay.
But even today will decay to rust, dust and fade.
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
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Inbred Ambitions
I remember the days,
People took their creativity seriously.
And lived to fulfill their inbred ambitions.
Today people want to participate,
More as a whim to socialize and network.
And when they stroll in late,
With excuses to make...
I am not one to appreciate it,
With a subtle delivery of comments.
And coming in smacking on gum!
And carrying snacks?
My discipline within I keep,
Will not allow me to tolerate that!
And 'please'...
Do not hold up other people's time,
By a display of 'theatrics' that lie.
That kind of disrespect,
Will get a direct sign I am more than upset!
I am clinical when I sever connections.
I remember the days,
People took their creativity seriously.
And lived to fulfill their inbred ambitions.
Today...
People are living to get the attention.
And wanting to get paid to display,
Both lack of talent and a depth of feeling...
For the craft!
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
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A Proper Focus
When we focus on what we see, our mind’s not focused on Eternity,
On those eternal things above, that we receive, through God’s Love.
Things we focus on here below, earthly things, we’ve come to know,
Can fill our heart with undue fear, when we limit our focus down here.
For our focus turns into concern, and a heart inside begins to yearn,
But not prompted by pleasantries, but, the heart filled with anxieties,
About the things we can’t control, while worry begins to take its toll,
With concerns far above our realm, a heart will just be overwhelmed.
Our concerns cannot be all ignored, but, must be given to The Lord,
Who sits above Heavenly realms, and our concerns He overwhelms.
With His Eternal Authority over all, earthly concerns to Him are small,
And in His time, I need to learn, He handles each and every concern.
Concerns, when they overwhelm us, lead us away from simple trust,
The simple faith we place in Him, when Christ saved us from our sin.
Through our trial, God gets Glory, as it was in Israel’s Exodus story,
Even with Pharaoh’s hardened heart, came a Glory that didn’t depart.
Today, our eyes should always be, focused on The Lord of Eternity,
The same one who delivered Israel, will work in our life His good will,
Today take on His yoke that’s light, for what He does, He does right,
To work out His purpose in the life, of all who belong to Jesus Christ.
(Copyright ©01/2008)
My Interests Have Changed
All of this time,
You knew you had information...
That could have provided me with benefits.
And you never mention this once,
Knowing I would advantage from it.
Why?
'I tried with many attempts.
Remember when you told me,
My interests were not of your concern? '
But why didn't you insist,
I close my mouth and open my ears to listen?
'Remember when you told me,
My interests were not of your concern?
And when I insisted that you listen...
On me your back you turned.
And for weeks,
You refused to say a thing to me?
And the last time I saw you standing on the street,
You told me I aggravated you!
And loudly exclaimed I interferred with your view.'
But I had not known,
Your interests were to my benefit.
'Now you do but guess what? '
What?
'My interests have changed.'
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
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Very Disconcerting
Please,
Don't interpret my dislike for his policies...
As being a statement against him,
Personally.
I think everyone in this neighborhood will say,
He is a good and honest person.
However...
Because he prefers to see weeds,
Growing in his backyard to be noticeable...
Throughout the neigborhood,
Brings the value of our properties down.
'But...
He has challenged all of you in court,
To accuse all of you of discrimination.
What do you have to say about that.'
That is very disconcerting.
'Why? '
Not one of us have allergies to flowers.
Or the smell of cut grass.
'What do you think about his running,
To hold public office...
To represent your interests? '
That again is a conflict of interests.
On one hand he says he wishes to represent us.
And on the other hand,
Our interest is to protect what we value.
'Which is? '
The declining values of our properties...
Which he has directly caused.
'But 'why' do you think he is doing this? '
We all believe he has chosen to take this route,
Because the tenant association has agreed...
To increase the gardener's salary,
We all pay as a maintenance fee...
To keep our front and backyards up to standards.
As is documented in our home ownership policies.
'His actions make little sense.'
You know it. I know it. We all know it.
But those who are not familiar with our situation,
Will probably earn him their sympathy votes.
And he will eventually win.
With the twisting of rules to have the law on his side.
'This is crazy! '
You know it. I know it. We all know it.
But when has the spreading of propaganda,
Had anything to do with actual fact?
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
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Diet And Digestion
I had felt crucified,
In those days long gone by...
When I had admitted to witnessing,
What others would deny and permitted.
I was thought to be then,
On a mission of negativity.
And that was the furthest thing,
From my objective mind.
I observe activities exactly as they are.
With no excuses for them to make.
And today those same folks who are broke,
Disgusted and choking back tears...
Now are willing to admit,
Their quality of life has taken a nose dive into pits.
'I'm sure you have concerns about this? '
I do!
And I've been taught to limit my concerns,
To exercise, diet and digestion with daily meditation!
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
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The Ones Considered Once On 'Abnormal' Missions
It wasn't that long ago...
When those who regarded themselves,
Normal...
Would campaign openly against,
Those perceived as strange and individual.
Because those who did not accept,
Their restricted visions...
Were made to feel like lepers.
Who had abnormal missions.
Well, well, well...
Here we are in twenty ten.
And the ones with those 'abnormal' missions...
Seem to be more than quite normal to me.
They were the ones watching their diets and exercising.
Meditating and speaking of a higher consciousness.
And those who once lived self righteous lives,
As they passed their judgements...
While making the 'weird' ones singled out to despise.
Seem today the ones totally crazed.
The ones now wishing to get away from those like themselves.
As the ones considered once on 'abnormal' missions...
Wishing to keep their peace and distance.
With the hope those of high moral 'standards'...
Do not find them to taint!
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
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To Suit the Taste of Those Wishing to Relive It
Pain is only felt
By the one who is feeling it.
Both the history and the depth of it...
Is only known by the one who lives it.
There will be those who give their opinions.
With a belief of what the agony was like.
With rewrites and their versions.
But the only one giving a true insight...
Will often be the one not available for an interview.
With scars too long healed to choose to be remembered.
Or give a depiction too realistic...
That becomes glamourized,
To suit the taste of those wishing to relive it!
To say convincingly...
What they had to endure and experience,
Was not that bad of a discomfort.
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
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Today; Tomorrow
Today
It’s been five years since I have heard your voice.
Today
It’s been five years since I have heard your laugh.
Today
It’s been five years since I have seen your smile.
Today
Is the saddest day for me.
Today
I still remember like it was yesterday.
Today
I feel numb just like how I felt five years ago.
Today
I can still remember how I ran and didn’t want to stop.
Today
I still feel the emptiness of knowing I won’t ever see you again.
Today
I try and smile for you knowing that you are watching over me.
Today
I let my tears roll down slowly down my cheeks.
Today
I remember how you were so happy to be home.
Today
I still know that you didn’t have to suffer no more.
Today
I still try hard not to blame myself why you left my world.
Today
I sit here and remember the memories I have of you.
But tomorrow
I will still smile for you.
poem by Kimberly Santistevan
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Recreational Degradations
The comfort and ease of celebration,
That comes to comfort myths...
And a way of life,
Fragmented in its appeal.
Dances with an erasing purpose.
Standards are showing a fading quality.
And equality documented,
Seems less of an intention than what is meant.
Structured foundations and their sentiments,
Have lost pride.
Only gestures remain,
To market an effectiveness.
Recreational degradations...
Has a conformity parading malfunctions.
Dysfunctions are the normalcy.
And a common sense,
Has desolved in pretensions.
And yet those few with integrity,
Are losing a battle with disrespect.
Like an endangered sanity...
Once valued,
But few are witnessed to have that left!
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
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Theres No Label In Me
I have no label,
I have a life to live,
I have a family that cares for me,
Why label yourself,
Why choose to be emo, goth, prep, or whatever,
Why,
Can you answer that yourself,
Can find the answers I seek in this poem,
I have no label,
I am me,
I have found me,
My life is a cycle,
It runs around in circles,
Theres no label in me,
Don't label yourself until you know what your are or who you are.
poem by Jennifer Rondeau
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I Feel Fantastic
I feel fantastic!
How long will that last?
Until...
Well,
That I don't.
But I wont spend time,
To question or ask!
Or figure that out...
As you 'scout' about!
So don't waste yours,
Wondering in comparison.
There is nothing to compare.
Just remember this:
Stop before you start.
There will be no broken heart left here.
For you to drop...
To name as another victim tamed.
Or claimed you have trained,
To produce your wishes.
I said I feel fantastic.
Not stupid.
I didn't get to feel this way...
Without recognizing past mistakes.
To allow shallow flattery,
Consume a nonexistent ego!
Do you believe I am blind?
I have long left that kind of stupidness,
Far behind.
And that took some time...
To 'see' in my mind,
The teases you present.
Desperation...
Does not sit with me here,
In anticipation!
The only thing I'm giving up to you,
Is much gratitude!
I have found the strength...
To keep temptation you represent,
At a distance!
You have no idea,
How fantastic it is,
To know and hear...
That admitted.
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
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I Am Quiet In Gratitude To God
I am quiet in gratitude to God
Saved again
Near tears in tears
Grateful to God
And trying within
To let the Gratitude be everything
And forget for a time
The fear that will return again-
Quiet in Gratitude to God
And wanting that Gratitude to be everything.
poem by Shalom Freedman
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A View To Complete And Realize
Following those paths,
That ultimately lead to oblivion...
Is something done some people do,
As if this was their custom...
With a doing of it.
To prove they exist to initiate chaos,
And confusion.
Those not learning,
From their own repeated experiences...
Should not be admonished for expressing ignorance.
There are those with fatalistic ambitions,
Who are rarely found sitting in seats of leadership...
That seek,
At the expense of others...
A view to complete and realize their sick sadistic wishes.
And like sheep,
The people allow these people with charisma...
To follow.
Believing them to represent their interests the best.
And they 'do' represent...
Their overwhelming lack of concern,
As best as they possibly can present it!
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
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These Are Symptoms
Rather than to admit to madness,
It was left unaddressed and explosed.
Rather than prevent it in its steps,
And arresting its progress...
The symptoms were ignored,
As a decision everyone then chose.
Locally,
People were still stuck...
In a 'they' and 'them' mindset.
Having no interests in backyard events.
Not even to be curious enough,
To take a peek through the fence.
Set in their ways and making less sense.
Accepting and tolerating a decline of their lives.
Not wishing to cause trouble...
So they kept their mouths closed,
To minimize the hassle.
And made any complaints,
In muffled tones in their homes.
As if a disease had arrived to condone.
And one did!
Rather than to admit to madness,
It was left unaddressed and explosed.
Rather than prevent it in its steps,
And arresting its progress...
The symptoms were ignored,
As a decision everyone then chose.
Locally,
People were still stuck...
In a 'they' and 'them' mindset.
Having no interests in backyard events.
Not even to be curious enough,
To take a peek through the fence.
Set in their ways and making less sense.
And...
Babbling incoherently.
Pointing to each other as another would agree.
'No.No.No,
They're sick.'
These are symptoms!
~No.No.
They are.~
These are symptoms!
*No.No.
We're not! *
These are symptoms!
'They are.'
These are symptoms!
~Nooo.~
'No.No.No,
She's sick.'
These are symptoms!
~No.No.
He is.~
These are symptoms!
*No.No.
THEY are.*
These are symptoms!
'NO! '
These are symptoms!
~Nooo.~
'No.No.No,
They're sick.'
These are symptoms!
~No.No.
They are.~
These are symptoms!
*No.No.
We're not! *
These are symptoms!
'They are.'
These are symptoms!
~Nooo.~
These are symptoms!
~No.~
Symptoms,
Yes!
These are symptoms!
~No.~
Symptoms,
Yes!
These are symptoms!
~No.~
Symptoms,
Yes!
These are symptoms.
~No.~
These are symptoms.
Symptoms.
Symptoms.
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
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