I am now in that happy comfortable state that I do not hesitate to indulge in any fancy in regard to diet, but watch the consequences, and do not continue any course which adds to weight or bulk and consequent discomfort.
quote by William Banting
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Related quotes
Thigh Way (Song Parody of 'My Way')
to the tune of 'MY Way'
And now, my weigh-ins near
and my poor scale faces destruction
I've cheated, had some LITE beers
then gotten quotes for liposuction
I've eaten way past full
and then had one more for the highway
I've gotten old, I've gotten fat
don't diet my way!
Bagettes, I've had a few, but then again, too few to mention
I love my salty snacks
but that's what gave me hypertension
I planned each 3 course meal
at greasy spoons along the highway
Ive gotten old
I've gotten fat
don't diet my way
Yes there were times when I was blue
Ice cream in quarts, I would go through
but through it all, despite the gout
I'd eat it in, or take it out
I ate it all, - and I'm not tall
don't diet my way
I've lunched, I've wined and dined
I've had my failed attempts at losing
but now my jeans just split
and it no longer seems amusing.
To think I ate it all
and may I say not in a shy way
I've gotten old, I've gotten fat
don't diet my way
For what is a meal without cake for desert
and JOGGING IS DANGEROUS - a guy could get hurt
I ate the foods I truly craved
and never once was fashion's slave
The weight-in shows, I need new clothes
don't diet my way!
poem by John F. McCullagh
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Sample & Hold
Sample and hold
Hair: blonde
Eyes: blue
Weight: 110
Disposition: even
Mood code: rotary adjustable
I need a unit to sample and hold
But not the angry one
A new design, new design.
I need a unit to sample and hold
But not the lonely one
A new design, new design.
I need a unit to sample and hold
But not the lonely one
A new design, new design.
Sample and hold.
Well send it out right away
Satisfaction guaranteed.
Please specify
The color of skin and eye
We know youll be happy.
Dont hesitate to give us a call
We know youll be satisfied
When you energize
And see your unit come alive
We know youll be happy.
I need a unit to sample and hold
But not the lonely one, the lonely one, the lonely one
Sample and hold.
Weight: 110.
Perfection in every details
Fabricated from the curl of the hair
To the tip of the nail
Because our units never fail
We know youll be happy.
I need a unit to sample and hold.
Dont hesitate to give us a call
We know youll be satisfied
When you energize
And see your unit come alive
We know youll be happy.
I need a unit to sample and hold.
We know youll be happy 110
We know youll be happy
We know youll be happy.
But not the lonely one
A new design, new design
Perfection in every detail, new design
Sample and hold.
song performed by by Neil Young
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Ignorance of what real learning is, and a consequent suspicion of it; materialism, and a consequent intellectual laxity, both of these have done destructive work in the colleges.
quote by Katharine Fullerton Gerould
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Grapefruit Diet
Whos that waddlin down the street
Its just me cause I love to eat
Fudge and twinkies and deviled ham
Whos real flabby? yes, I am!
Every picture of mes
Gotta be an aerial view
Now my doctor tells me
Theres just one thing left to do
Grapefruit diet (diet!)
Throw out the pizza and beer
Grapefruit diet (diet!)
Oh, get those jelly donuts out of here
Grapefruit diet (diet!)
Might seem a little sever
Grapefruit diet (diet!)
Im gettin tired of my big fat rear
Blow, fatty!
Well, I used to live on chocolate sauce
Made sumo wrestlers look like kate moss
Walked down an alley and I got stuck
I got more rolls than a pastry truck
When Im all done eating
I eat a little more
When I leave a room
First I gotta grease the door
Grapefruit diet (diet!)
Cant have another eclair
Grapefruit diet (diet!)
I gotta decrease my derriere
Im on a grapefruit diet
Im on a grapefruit diet
Im on a grapefruit diet
No more pie now
No more creme brulee
Lay off the gravy
And souffle
No french fri-yi-yies now
No ice cream parfait
Mr. cheese nacho
Stay away
Oh I think Id sell my soul
For a triple patty melt
But I need a boomerang
When I put on my belt
Grapefruit diet (diet!)
Lay off the 3 musketeers
Grapefruit diet (diet!)
Until my big booty disappears
Grapefruit diet (diet!)
Eat em till theyre comin out of my ears
Grapefruit diet (diet!)
cause I havent seen my feet in years
Im on a grapefruit diet
Im on a grapefruit diet
Im on a grapefruit diet
I think Im about ready for a quarter pounder with extra cheese
I need a side order of onion rings
And dont forget to super-size that
song performed by by Weird Al Yankovic
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Convoluted......folding Bed.
the day did nothing
bit by bit, it did not arrive
at something whole
like a circle for instance
something's bothering
like a landscape that never
closes
ends are opening
so incomplete that it is the mind
that goes on
dovetailing what is not there
it is this sophistication
this flare for fire this frame
of reference
the ant has arrived at a point
when the issue is no longer whether
he is happy with the empire or not
it is just the constant walking in line
operating on the smell of the day
the sun-dance in the sand
forever numb and no longer asking
what is really happening
i like to think that i do not have to think anymore.
it is comfortable, when we only have to watch and not
even speculate about consequences.
the house is not a resting place
neither one worships God in the church.
poem by Ric S. Bastasa
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Sample And Hold
Hair: Blonde
Eyes: Blue
Weight: 110
Disposition: Even
Mood Code: Rotary Adjustable
I need a unit to sample and hold
But not the angry one
A new design new design
I need a unit to sample and hold
But not the lonely one
A new design new design
I need a unit to sample and hold
But not the lonely one
A new design new design
Sample and Hold
We'll send it out right away
Satisfaction guaranteed
Please specify
The colour of skin and eye
We know you'll be happy
I need a unit to sample and hold
Don't hesitate to give us a call
We know you'll be satisfied
When you energize
And see your unit come alive
We know you'll be happy
I need a unit to sample and hold
I need a unit to sample and hold
But not the lonely one, lonely one, lonely one
Weight: 110
Perfection in every detail
Fabricated from the curl of the hair
To the tip of the nail
Because our units never fail
We know you'll be happy
I need a unit to sample and hold
Don't hesitate to give us a call
We know you'll be satisfied
When you energize
And see your unit come alive
We know you'll be happy
We know you'll be happy
We know you'll be happy
We know you'll be happy
But not the lonely one
A new design, new design
Sample and hold
New design, new design
Sample and hold
I need a unit to sample and hold
But not the angry one
A new design, new design
I need a unit to sample and hold
But not the jealous one
A new design, new design
New design, new design
Perfection in every detail
New design, new design
Perfection in every detail
New design, new design
Perfection in every detail
New design, new design
Sample and hold
Sample and hold
Sample and hold
song performed by by Neil Young
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Fundamental of Liar Chapter LXIII: Complimentary
Some regard it as an honor
Some regard it as a burden
Some regard it as a formality
Some regard it as a flattery
Some regard it as an improver
Some regard it as an insult
poem by Maria Sudibyo
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Points
Counting points every day
To try and keep my weight at bay
Low cal this low fat that
Its all to keep me from getting fat
Meer morsels appear upon my plate
Were once was full my mighty plate
Green stuff coming out my ears
I should have buckteeth and rabbit ears
The weight is dropping really slow
I have such a long way to go
Rabbit food and plate so bare
About my weight I really care
Four months down the line
Lost loads of weight and feeling fine
No more grumbling about the food
That balanced diet done me good
Chellaston
06 04 2010
poem by Jim O'Donnell
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Let Me Be The First To Know
If you find a time when things just seem to fall apart
And theres no way to keep a cheery face
When the sight of your own reflection only breaks your heart
And all your dreams have given up the chase
Pick up the telephone
You know Im always home
Any old time of night or day
Let me be the first to know
Let me be the first to know
Let me be the first to know
If you find a time when you just have to walk away
Because of a call to pastures new
Youre in need of some fresh words to wish you on your way
You need to fly on up and touch the moon
Sharing this temporary weight
No time to hesitate
I will be everything you need
Let me be the first to know
Let me be the first to know
Let me be the first to know
Let me be the first ...
Were water breaking on an endless wave
Potential bursting from the sea
Compassion is what sets our minds apart
Be cheerful when you break
The chains of morality
Oo, sharing this welcome weight
Dont even hesitate
I will be everything you need
Let me be the first to know
Let me be the first to know
Let me be the first to know
Let me be the first to know
Let me be the first one to know
song performed by by Howard Jones
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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I Used To Be Fat
I used to be fat,
Just like one spoilt brat,
As fat as a brat could be...
I could squash you flat,
Just as quick as that...
No-one stood too close to me...
Started a diet,
No need to fry it
And my weight began to fall!
One book! Just buy it!
You've got to try it!
And here's the number to call...
Just chew, chew, chew it!
Then loo, loo, loo it!
And soon, you'll be on the mend!
How do you do it?
Continue through it!
Persevere, my fat, fat friend!
I chewed like a cow,
Yes, I chewed and how
And I exercised each day...
Ta-da! Take a bow!
Just look at me now!
Admit it! I look O.K.!
poem by Denis Martindale
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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I didn't think I was fat. I just thought I didn't need to gain any weight. But I would drop weight and then I would be comfortable with that number. Then I would lose more weight and that would become my new number.
quote by Tracey Gold
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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In the Plane
I was in the plane.
Someone asked:
-Are you comfortable?
-Oh, yes! Thank you!
He has shortened
the space between the seats.
And now? – he asked again.
He had to thank God for
we were in the plane,
otherwise I would
smash his face,
it could be a disgrace.
Some people feel discomfort
when you feel good.
They are so happy
when you are in a bad mood.
©Larisa Rzhepishevska
1.11.2010
poem by Larisa Rzhepishevska
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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The Eternal Twins: Love And Hate
It consumes without regard
It shape without regard
It bends you to its will
We are helpless in its power
We look for it but it finds us
It devours without regard
It destroys without regard
It brought nations to its knees
And lifted its people
It gives power without regard
It enslaves without regard
We are but pebbles in its wake
When it overflows in us
And yet.... Its ugly twin holds
Power over it
It consumes without regard
It shapes without regard
It bends you to its will
We are helpless in its power....
poem by Leonid Gonzalez
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Plain And Simple
When I walked through the door
of a fancy fashion store.
All around was finery.
Who could ask for anything more?
But all I saw was not for me.
It was too fancy for my eyes.
So when I tried one on for size
I saw immediately
that fancy lace and silks and satin
never were my style.
And still just the sight I saw in the glass
for that shortened while
contented me to know myself
and who I'd never be.
Simple, comfortable and practical
were the clothes for me.
When I walked through the door
of that fancy fashion store
I went in because I needed a job
and saw a sign on the door
'HELP NEEDED'
poem by Edwina Reizer
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Laughing The Day Away
what happens happens
there is nothing you can do about it
the plan last night
to avert the consequences
did not work out
what happens happens
as expected
and we watch the consequences
without hesitation & regret
and then we learn the last
step of this process
this total acceptance
and then we laugh all these away
as though
things and event become passe
it's over, what's next?
that is the excitement.
poem by Ric S. Bastasa
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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But if I'm going to cause somebody else discomfort by my actions, then I should probably modify my actions toward them to make them as comfortable as possible.
quote by Max Cannon
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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It's What You Are To Me
A heartfelt word
A sad goodbye
To hear you laugh
To see you cry
It all adds up
Its what you are to me
A hold of hands
A kiss to cheek
Still makes my heart
Skip that beat
It all adds up
Its what you are to me
Without you
I'd be lost
But my mind doesn't reach that far
You're my one for life
You're my guiding star
It all adds up
It's what you are to me
It's what you are to me
To memorise your sentences
To capture every word
To have every smile you've ever given me in my heart
I couldn't bare to be apart
It all adds up
It's what you are to me
poem by Lucy Vernezze
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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A diet is when you watch what you eat and wish you could eat what you watch.
Hermione Gingold in press report (1973)
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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I Must Go On A Diet!
Yes, I must go on a diet! I really, really must!
Yes, it's true I'd loathe to try it, but if I don't, I'll bust!
I know it's hip, this losing weight, to join a gym and such,
But exercise, I'd simply hate, as I don't like it much...
My belly's not worth looking at, it bulges now and then...
I'd merely roll, flat on the mat and not get up again...
I'll make a stand and walk it off, at double time, I guess!
Who cares if others stare and scoff, if I weigh less and less?
I've never run a marathon and know I never will.
I'd simply say, I can't go on! No stamina or skill...
I'll walk the streets or buy a bike, until my belly's right...
I'll give up all the cakes I like, chew carrots day and night!
I'll switch to fruits and vegetables... I'll do the best I can,
I'll overcome all obstacles to look like Peter Pan!
Ta-ta to sweet treats, smokes and beers! I'll live temptation free!
Who knows? It may take months! Or years! Or decades! Goodness me!
Too late to talk me out of it! My mind's made up, my friend...
I'll get this weight off, bit by bit, on that you can depend!
I'll tone up muscles here and there... I'll fight the flab each day!
Before and after! Please compare... The diet's worked O.K.!
poem by Denis Martindale
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Indulge Me
My latest little mood
A darker shade of blue
Still I draw closer to you
My pretty little dress
Begins to look a mess
Infatuation come through
Enlighten me with you
Look at things the way you do
Indulge me please
Ill take the breath you breathe
Take heart Im telling you
My life has come too soon
But somewhere Ill find some time
In every other way
Youve told me what to say
These final words now are mine
Enlighten me with you
Look at things the way you do
Indulge me please
Ill take the breath you breathe
Make the dream come true
Show me how to comfort you
Indulge me please
Ill take the breath you breathe
You may have walked away
But were still as close
As when I gazed
Deep in your gentle eyes
Enlighten me with you
Look at things the way you do
Indulge me please
Ill take the breath you breathe
Make the dream come true
Show me how to comfort you
Indulge me please
Ill take the breath you breathe
Enlighten me with you
Look at things the way you do
Indulge me please
Ill take the breath you breathe
Make the dream come true
Show me how to comfort you
Indulge me please
Ill take the breath you breathe
Enlighten me with you
Look at things the way you do
Indulge me please
Ill take the breath you breathe
Make the dream come true
Show me how to comfort you
Indulge me please
Ill take the breath you breathe
song performed by by Olive
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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