I Used To Be Fat
I used to be fat,
Just like one spoilt brat,
As fat as a brat could be...
I could squash you flat,
Just as quick as that...
No-one stood too close to me...
Started a diet,
No need to fry it
And my weight began to fall!
One book! Just buy it!
You've got to try it!
And here's the number to call...
Just chew, chew, chew it!
Then loo, loo, loo it!
And soon, you'll be on the mend!
How do you do it?
Continue through it!
Persevere, my fat, fat friend!
I chewed like a cow,
Yes, I chewed and how
And I exercised each day...
Ta-da! Take a bow!
Just look at me now!
Admit it! I look O.K.!
poem by Denis Martindale
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Related quotes
Chew Chew Chew (Your Bubble Gum)
Ella Fitzgerald - Chew Chew Chew
[Instrumental Intro 55 seconds approx.]
[Ella]
Chew Chew Chew Chew
Your Bubble Gum
Chew Chew Chew Chew
Your Bubble Gum
Chew Chew Chew Chew
Your Bubble Gum
Chew Chew Chew Baby
[Repeated x2]
First you pop, then you stop
The gum gets big and round.
Blow your troubles,
Way like bubbles
When you hear that
Funny little sound [pop noise]
Chew Chew Chew Chew
Your Bubble Gum
Chew Chew Chew Chew
Your Bubble Gum
Chew Chew Chew Chew
Your Bubble Gum
Chew Chew Chew Chew Your Bubble Gum!
[Boys]
Listen Sis your havin fun,
Chewing on your bubble gum
Give us some and we shall see,
Just what fills your heart with glee
[Ella]
Boys your right Im havin fun
Chewin on my bubble gum
Bubble gum it makes me sing,
Here chew some to make you swing!
[Instrumental]
First you pop, then you stop
The gum gets big and round.
Blow your troubles,
Way like bubbles
When you hear that
Funny little sound [pop noise]
song performed by by Ella Fitzgerald
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Spill
Push holes in the plastic
Immaculate dolls in the hands of a child with a ratchet
Two fingers too out of control
The confusion shall leave us to vultures and preachers
I hate it...
Can't take it...
I can't believe it
Why don't you see it?
I can't believe it
Chew me up when needed
Turn over another day older
Another day nearer to jumping on over
Bloodsuckers and lover that leave you
And tease you and cheat you, deceive you I see through
I hate it...
Don't want it...
I can't believe it
Why don't you see it?
I can't believe it
Chew me up when needed
I can't believe it
Why don't you see it?
I can't believe it
Chew me up when needed
I'll say what I wanna say
I'll say what I wanna say
I can't believe it
Why don't you see it?
I can't believe it
Chew me up when needed
I can't believe it
Why don't you see it?
I can't believe it
Chew me up when needed
I can't believe it
Why don't you see it?
I can't believe it
Chew me up when needed
I can't believe it
Why don't you see it?
I can't believe it
Chew me up when needed...
song performed by by Feeder
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Cows
I love to watch my seven cows
In meads of buttercups abrowse,
With guilded knees;
But even more I love to see
Them chew the cud so tranquilly
In twilight ease.
Each is the image of content
From fragrant hours in clover spent,
'Mid leaf and bud;
As up and down without a pause
Mechanically move their jaws
To chew the cud.
Friend, there's a hope for me and you:
Let us resolve to chew and chew
With molars strong;
The man who learns to masticate
With patience may control his fate,
His life prolong.
In salivation is salvation:
So if some silly little nation
Should bathe in blood,
Let's take a lesson from the cow,
And learn in life's long gloaming how
To chew the cud.
poem by Robert William Service
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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I WANNA STIFF YOU...by talile ali
I WANNA DO YOU
DO, DO, DO, YOU
I WANNA DO YOU
RIGHT, RIGHT NOW
I WANNA CHEW YOU
CHEW, CHEW, CHEW, YOU
I WANNA CHEW YOU
HERE AND HOW
I WANNA STIFF YOU
PSYCHEDELIC TWIST YOU
I WANNA STIFF YOU
SWELLING TIGHTLY ON
I WANNA EAT YOU
LICK AND KISS AND MEAT YOU
I WANNA TREAT YOU
TO THIS HORNY SONG
EVERY TIME YOU SEE ME
KNOW YOU WANNA PLEASE ME
IT IS AT THIS TIME
SOMETHING DON'T SEEM TO BE RIGHT
COME ON DOWN AND DO ME
NO NEED TO PITCH AND WOO ME
LETS GO AT IT TILL YOU KNOW
HOW I NEED YOU ALL NIGHT
poem by Talile Ali
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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The secret to my success is that I bit off more than I could chew and chewed as fast as I could.
quote by Paul Hogan
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Well, I think every now and again, some people deserve to get their butts chewed. Every now and again some people deserve a pat on the back. What I try and do is compliment folk who deserve a compliment, and chew folks out who deserve to be chewed out.
quote by Judge Mills Lane
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Dogs A Best Friends Dog
Shame
Dog shame
I know whats wrong
Mans too old and wise
Bring in the dog
Turn on
Down the mountain rescue
Slip and slide when sunny
Small cat better move along
Or this bitch could do harm, baby
Straight as an arrow
Im walking the dog
Three is a crowd
Two is a dog and me playing
(whats he saying)
Free as a cloud
No one ever really knew you
Make clear your illusion no, no, no, no
Some dreams you dream you alone
You thank christ youre coming home
Better better give the dog a bone
Go go go go chew chew chew chew
Some dreams you dream alone
Go get a life and ease the pain
Dogs a best friends dog
Dogs a best friends dog
Word, speech, blurred, bleached
Tell mr godot Im walking the dog
Walking the dog
Some dreams you dream you alone
You thank christ youre coming home
Better better give the dog a bone
Go go go go chew chew chew chew
Some dreams you dream alone
Go get a life and ease the pain
Dogs a best friends dog
Dogs a best friends dog
song performed by by Tears For Fears
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Christmas Is Going To The Dogs
Get off your sled and go to bed
Don't you ever tire?
Throw a bone, I'm finally home
Curled up by the fire
Snow is falling from the sky like ashes from an urn
Sweet dreams, my little one
Now it's my turn
Well, Christmas is going to the dogs
We'd rather have chew toys than Yule logs
And things aren't looking very good, it's true
So I'll just lay here and chew
Now, when I sleep I like to dream
Of rabbits in the snow
Jumping right into my jaws
From their rabbit hole
Take one home and set him down right next to you shoes
Wake up to a big surprise
My gift to you
And Christmas is going to the dogs
We'd rather have chew toys than Yule logs
And things aren't looking very good, it's true
So I'll just lay here and chew
And Christmas is going to the dogs
We're scarfing down the turkey and egg nog
And things aren't looking very good, it's true
So I'll just lay here and chew
So I'll just stay here and chew...
song performed by by Eels
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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I Met My Girl On The Other End Of My Penny Chew (Fun Poem 19)
Well, there I was in the candy store,
choosing my candy from the counter.
In she walked wings on her feet,
and her head, way up in the clouds.
I grabbed up a penny chew,
before I could even get the wrapper off,
she was on the other end of it.
I looked down my nose;
all I could see were teeth,
and two big eyeballs looking at me.
Well, there I was looking at what I had hooked,
the fish kept wriggling in front of me.
When along she came bold as brass,
and stood right there beside me.
I grabbed up a penny chew,
before I could even get the wrapper off,
she was on the other end of it.
I looked down my nose;
all I could see were teeth,
and two big eyeballs looking at me.
Well, I had had enough by now,
so I asked her to marry me.
Those big eyeballs rolled around,
and the teeth said, “Yes please.”
So here we are on our wedding night,
all tucked up in bed and I looked,
not a penny chew in sight.
I said, “No penny chews, my dear? ”
“I don’t believe it! Our wedding night and all he wants is a penny chew! ”
poem by David Harris
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Dear friends, we surely all agree
'Dear friends, we surely all agree
There's almost nothing worse to see
Than some repulsive little bum
Who's always chewing chewing gum.
(It's very near as bad as those
Who sit around and pick the nose).
So please believe us when we say
That chewing gum will never pay;
This sticky habit's bound to send
The chewer to a sticky end.
Did any of you ever know
A person called Miss Bigelow?
This dreadful woman saw no wrong
In chewing, chewing all day long.
She chewed while bathing in the tub,
She chewed while dancing at her club,
She chewed in church and on the bus;
It really was quite ludicrous!
And when she couldn't find her gum,
She'd chew up the linoleum,
Or anything that happened near–
A pair of boots, the postman's ear,
Or other people's underclothes,
And once she chewed her boy friend's nose.
She went on chewing till, at last,
Her chewing muscles grew so vast
That from her face her giant chin
Stuck out just like a violin.
For years and years she chewed away,
Consuming fifty packs a day,
Until one summer's eve, alas,
A horrid business came to pass.
Miss Bigelow went late to bed,
For half an hour she lay and read,
Chewing and chewing all the while
Like some great clockwork crocodile.
At last, she put her gum away
Upon a special little tray,
And settled back and went to sleep–
(She managed this by counting sheep).
But now, how strange! Although she slept,
Those massive jaws of hers still kept
On chewing, chewing through the night,
Even with nothing there to bite.
They were, you see, in such a groove
They positively had to move.
And very grim it was to hear
In pitchy darkness, loud and clear,
This sleeping woman's great big trap
Opening and shutting, snap–snap–snap!
Faster and faster, chop–chop–chop,
The noise went on, it wouldn't stop.
Until at last her jaws decide
To pause and open extra wide,
And with the most tremendous chew
They bit the lady's tongue in two.
Thereafter, just from chewing gum,
Miss Bigelow was always dumb,
And spent her life shut up in some
Disgusting sanatorium.
And that is why we'll try so hard
To save Miss Violet Beauregard
From suffering an equal fate.
She's still quite young. It's not too late,
Provided she survives the cure.
We hope she does. We can't be sure.'
poem by Roald Dahl
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Beat On The Brat
Written by Jeffrey Hyman, John Cummings, Douglas Colvin
For-sake the power
Beat on the brat
Beat on the brat
Beat on the brat with a baseball bat
Oh yeah, oh yeah, oh-oh
I beat on the brat
I beat on the brat
I beat on the brat with a baseball bat
Oh yeah, oh yeah, oh-oh
Oh yeah, oh yeah, oh-oh
What can you do?
What can you do?
With a brat like that always on your back
What can you lose?
What can you lose?
What can you lose?
With a brat like that always on your back
What can you do?
Do, yeah
Beat on the brat
Beat on the brat
Beat on the brat with a baseball bat
Oh yeah, oh yeah, oh-oh
Beat on the brat
Beat on the brat
Beat on the brat with a baseball bat
Oh yeah, oh yeah, oh-oh
Oh yeah, oh yeah, oh-oh
What can you do?
What can you do?
With a brat like that always on your back
What can you do?
What can you lose?
What can you lose?
With a brat like that always on your back
What can you do?
song performed by by U2
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Bite off more than you can chew and then chew like hell.
quote by Peter Brock
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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The Dog And The Cat
The dog says to the cat
'Why don't you come down from that tree
I'll only chew you up and spit you out
And make you my new treat'
The cat stretches and yawns a bit
And says, ' You only think you want me down
But I'll tell you now you stupid dog
You a mutt, you ain't no hound'
'Now you've done it! 'says the dog
'I just marked your tree! '
'When you do come down we'll know the truth
About those nine lives you keep! '
'This is this and that is that! '
Said from the tree the cat
'Stupid dog thinks he's a hound
But ain't nothing but a lazy brat! '
'All you do is lay around all day
And poop where ever you go!
At least I got some dignity
I dig myself a hole'
Now the dog was steaming mad
'You come on down from that tree! '
'I'll show you some hound found
And I'll chew on that dignity! '
About that time a young girl comes out
She spates that dog on his rump
The cat she seen and jumped right into her arms
From that tree with one big jump
'Don't scare my kitty! ' the girl said
'Or I'll just have to give you away! '
The cat now stuck her tongue out at the dog
And she did still have this to say
'You see I told you, you stupid mutt of a dog
How do you like that on your rump!
You don't even know after all this time
You've been sitting in your own dump! '
copyright 2005 Bill Simmons
aka [email protected]
poem by Bill Simmons
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Bite off more than you can chew, then chew it. Plan more than you can do, then do it.
I Must Go On A Diet!
Yes, I must go on a diet! I really, really must!
Yes, it's true I'd loathe to try it, but if I don't, I'll bust!
I know it's hip, this losing weight, to join a gym and such,
But exercise, I'd simply hate, as I don't like it much...
My belly's not worth looking at, it bulges now and then...
I'd merely roll, flat on the mat and not get up again...
I'll make a stand and walk it off, at double time, I guess!
Who cares if others stare and scoff, if I weigh less and less?
I've never run a marathon and know I never will.
I'd simply say, I can't go on! No stamina or skill...
I'll walk the streets or buy a bike, until my belly's right...
I'll give up all the cakes I like, chew carrots day and night!
I'll switch to fruits and vegetables... I'll do the best I can,
I'll overcome all obstacles to look like Peter Pan!
Ta-ta to sweet treats, smokes and beers! I'll live temptation free!
Who knows? It may take months! Or years! Or decades! Goodness me!
Too late to talk me out of it! My mind's made up, my friend...
I'll get this weight off, bit by bit, on that you can depend!
I'll tone up muscles here and there... I'll fight the flab each day!
Before and after! Please compare... The diet's worked O.K.!
poem by Denis Martindale
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Aint Chew Gonna Keep On Goin
Aint chew gonna keep it goin’
Aint chew gonna be true
Aint chew gonna be my baby
Lik I’m a baby to you.
poem by David E. Patton
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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From A Needom I Feed
I am...
Channeling a need.
Channeling a need,
I am.
Channeling a need,
From a 'needom' I feed.
Gobbled up and in my mouth,
A lot of it chewed.
I am...
Channeling a need,
From a 'needom' I do.
Gobbled up and in my mouth,
A lot of it chewed I do...
Channeling a need,
With a needom to chew.
I am...
Channeling a need.
Channeling a need,
I am...
Channeling a need,
From a 'needom' I feed.
'Why are you so ridiculous? '
Us?
There is no 'us in 'I'.
I prefer you say 'ridiculi'.
And that is why...
I am...
Channeling a need,
From a 'needom' I feed.
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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A Mouthful Of Poetry
i sometimes put
words in my nipple
and you who love words
and chew them well
lick and chew my
nipple,
poetry is tickling
and you can but close your
eyes and
put on a luscious
smile
i have your words
too in a mouthful
i drink them all
we have words for love
and letters for caresses
we are simply poets in this
corner
choosing love, loving love
living in love
in mouthfuls....
poem by Ric S. Bastasa
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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A Man's Best Friend
Once, there was a dog
Who lived in a zoo.
His name was Butterscotch,
And he loved bones to chew.
He would roll over
Every time I came by,
And he would sit up
If I offered a French fry.
Butterscotch was the best,
But sometimes he was bad.
He would chew on my shoes
And the purse that I had.
Not only that,
He would act so crazy.
He would go 'Bark! '
Or he would be lazy.
One day, we had blackbirds
Fly near his cage.
Butterscotch barked
At blackbirds out of rage.
This dog was a nut,
And he was so loud,
That he could make the wind
That scared away clouds.
Sometimes Butterscotch
Might act the wrong way.
However, I remember
'Every dog has its day.'
Butterscotch is so cool,
He will do what he is told.
He does so many tricks.
He is nowhere near old.
Do not forget
That a dog is a man's best friend.
In fact, he just might make it
With you to the end.
poem by Rebecca Ryan
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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View The Dragon
View the powerful dragons of this century,
Find their names and view the common logic,
Chew the warehouse with its smoke and abbey.
With computers define the current times abnormally,
Fence in the animals too good and heroic,
View the powerful dragons of this century.
May winter complete nothing of itself as an absentee,
Religion carries the videos and classics heraldic,
Chew the warehouse with its smoke and abbey.
My terms of the moon are foods from absurdity,
Keeping individuals of theology who are heretic,
View the powerful dragons of this century.
Zoology states classes and categories that are lively,
Horns sound on the way to what is hectic,
Chew the warehouse with its smoke and abbey.
My decision guesses as thawing carries on limitlessly,
This day we mar the region of skin that is ironic,
View the powerful dragons of this century,
Chew the warehouse with its smoke and abbey.
poem by Naveed Akram
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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