Baldness is visually enough of a stigma as it is without a big sweaty bloke on stage pointing it out.
quote by Johnny Vegas
Submitted by Lucian Velea
Vote! | Copy!
Related quotes
Baldness
Of your fathers gone by,
Where are they now?
Of your mothers gone by,
Where are they now?
Like the baldness on one's head because,
Man does not live forever!
You are the son of Hystaspis,
And you have a turban upon your head;
But do speak the truth always!
Because, life in the city is full of the truth.
Of the old men and women,
Living in the city of truth;
But like the tents of Cushan in afflection,
So is the baldness now upon the earth.
The earth is divided by rivers!
Like the sweet wine from the mountains;
And the waters of the sea do pave the way like,
The buying of the poor with silver!
But like the day that i became a foreigner,
My feet became like that of a deer.
Baldness is upon the earth like,
A basket full of sweet fruits;
But to buy the needy for a pair of shoes is like,
The sadness in every man's home.
poem by Edward Kofi Louis
Submitted by Poetry Lover
Vote! | Copy!
I'd Like a Bit
I'd like a bit
Of your sweaty love,
Your gasping, groaning sweaty love.
Your body fits my body like a glove,
(Your gasping, groaning, sweaty love) .
I want it more than the stars above,
(Your gasping, groaning, sweaty love) .
You're soft and silken like a dove,
I want a bit
Of your sweaty love.
poem by John Thorkild Ellison
Submitted by Poetry Lover
Vote! | Copy!
Skinny Sweaty Man
Flashin' lots of cash and spendin' lots-o-loot
he's sitting at the bar - then he's sittin' at the booth
across the dance floor he does scoot
he's the skinny sweaty man in the green suit
The caboose that could he goes toot toot
been known to gag and sometimes puke
a very good friend of granny goose
he's the skinny sweaty man in the green suit
Skinny sweaty man in the green suit
He's half man and half cartoon
but good buddy don't be confused
he's full blooded looney tune
he's the skinny sweaty man in the green suit
Face to face with the man in the moon
his family doctor is doctor seuss
if you catch him in your soup please don't shoot
he's the skinny sweaty man in the green suit
Skinny sweaty man in the green suit
He was new in town
a free wheelin' clown
a funny young duke
hangin' under the roof
of a place in time
united sound
he'll play a little guitar sing a few blues
he's the kind-a-guy that you can't refuse
despite the fact that he's no brute
he's the skinny sweaty man in the green suit
Strike the magic groove make him jerk and move
like an eight legged freak in snake skin boots
coming soon to a theatre near you
he's the skinny sweaty man in the green suit
song performed by by Red Hot Chili Peppers from The Uplift Mofo Party Plan
Submitted by Lucian Velea
Vote! | Copy!
Observation
A tall bloke talks
A short bloke listens
And on his face
A question
A smudge
A blue tear
Below his eye
Tattooed
poem by Michael Oliver
Submitted by Poetry Lover
Vote! | Copy!
Women will fly so high
The stigma attached
To widows and divorcees
Has been removed.
Men are officious to choose them.
The stigma attached
To errant women, premarital
And extra marital, will soon go.
Women then are free
To get freedom of sex.
No man can then cage them,
Who will fly so high.
25.09.2005
poem by Rm. Shanmugam Chettiar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
Vote! | Copy!
Kept Within Focus
People are only impressed to digest,
That which is visually presented.
And they bring along their cameras...
Tape-recorders with pens and pads,
Prepared to critique.
With a rushing to report and display,
In the streets.
What happens behind stage is of no interest.
And those who are creating special effects,
To keep it that way...
Do the pulling of the strings,
From behind the scenes.
As they make sure what is marketed,
Is kept within focus to be bought as sold.
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
Vote! | Copy!
Get Off The Stage
Oh, you silly old man
You silly old man
Youre making a fool of yourself
So get off the stage
You silly old man
In your misguided trousers
With your mascara and your fender guitar
And you think you can arouse us ?
But the song that you just sang
It sounds exactly like the last one
And the next one
I bet you it will sound
Like this one
Downstage, and offstage
Dont you feel all run in ?
And do you wonder when they will take it away ?
This is your final fling
But then applause ran high
But for the patience of the ones behind you
As a verse drags on like a month drags on
Its very short, but it seems very long
And the song that you just sang
It sounds exactly like the last one
And the next one
I bet you it will sound
Like this one
So, get off the stage
Oh, get off the stage
And when we get down off of the stage
Please stay off the stage - all day !
Get off the stage
Oh, get off the stage
And when weve had our money back
Then Id like your back in plaster
Oh, I know that you say
How age has no meaning
Oh, but here is your audience now
And theyre screaming :
Get off the stage
Oh, get off the stage
Because Ive given you enough of my time
And the money that wasnt even mine
Have you seen yourself recently ?
Oh, get off the stage
Oh, get off the stage
For whom, oh ...
For whom, oh ...
For whom, oh ...
For whom, oh ...
Get off the stage
Get off the stage
Get off the stage
For whom the bell tolls
song performed by by Morrissey
Submitted by Lucian Velea
Vote! | Copy!
We wanted to bring the political situation in Austria on stage. Naturally we could not do that without pointing to Austrian's northern neighbor Germany.
quote by Leon Askin
Submitted by Lucian Velea
Vote! | Copy!
The Knowledgeable One
They are not the brightest for to give them their due
And on his subject matter they did not have a clue
He seems a bit clever the older bloke said
To which his younger mate answered not right in the head.
Since he did seem a clever young person to me
With the older bloke's assumption I could only agree
And though I too not the brightest I was duly impressed
With one in his mid twenties who with knowledge is blessed.
The bloke in his thirties to the barmaid for another beer did call
With the knowledgeable one he did not seem impressed at all
And when the knowledgeable one had left the pub he turned to me to say
This bloke Socrates he was talking of who is he anyway?
His name is a name that I cannot recall
He cannot be famous he does not play football
I informed him the one of whom the clever one did speak
Is a long dead philosopher a legendary Greek.
He and his mate in his forties began to discuss Sunday's big game
Every player taking part they know them by name
Of football between them little they would not have known
Suppose like it is said of people to each their own.
poem by Francis Duggan
Submitted by Poetry Lover
Vote! | Copy!
Fiduciary Friendship
'E 'ad spragged me before for the loan of a quid.
But I told 'im straight out I was broke.
Still 'e would 'ang around me, wotever I did.
'E's a regiler obstinit bloke.
'E'd tapped me for dollars an' bit me for bobs;
An' I ain't too finanshil meself.
Wot with times like they are an' not too many jobs;
So a bloke 'as to 'ang to 'is pelf.
But this Mister Theodore give me a lead
'E's a genius all on 'is own
'E put me wise yestidy - jist wot I need,
When a bloke comes along for a loan.
I rekin this Theodore's out on 'is pat
As a shrewd an' a far-seein' bloke,
Wot can 'and out the patter an' deal with a flat,
'Fore 'e's time to make up to the joke.
So today, when this cove puts the 'ard word on me,
I tells 'im straight out I'm 'is friend,
An' I'm goin' to 'elp 'im from sheer sympathy
With a few quid I'm goin' to lend.
It 'urts me, I tells 'im, to ark at 'im moan,
An' I 'aven't the 'eart to refuse.
So I gives the poor coot a fidoosary loan
In the shape of some nice I.0.U.'s.
poem by Clarence Michael James Stanislaus Dennis
Submitted by Poetry Lover
Vote! | Copy!
A blind bloke walks into a shop with a guide dog. He picks the Dog up and starts swinging it around his head. Alarmed, a shop assistant calls out: 'Can I help, sir?' 'No thanks,' says the blind bloke. 'Just looking.'
quote by Tommy Cooper
Submitted by Lucian Velea
Vote! | Copy!
The Road To Stratford
The road to Stratford
is a hot and sweaty one.
Road works on the M3
started a sweaty start,
then the M25
another monstrous delay
that it made me wonder
if I was going to get there today.
It was then on to the M40
and more problems came
as a lorry shed some of its load
in different lanes.
The drive was hot and sticky,
all five hours of it,
but I finally arrived
and was thankful of that.
25 July 2008
poem by David Harris
Submitted by Poetry Lover
Vote! | Copy!
Happiness in change of stages
I went on foot to far away school.
Then I rode on a bicycle with a pride.
Later two-wheeler took me to pedestal.
Now a car. In each stage I was happy.
In each stage the intensity was same.
Every up stage is a happy stage
till it is replaced by the next stage.
31.12.2000, Pmdi
poem by Rm. Shanmugam Chettiar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
Vote! | Copy!
Someone who is pointing his finger to another person is not always aware that the four remaining fingers are pointing in his direction.
There's one thing about baldness, it's neat.
quote by Don Herold
Submitted by Lucian Velea
Vote! | Copy!
The Stranger's Friend
The strangest things and the maddest things, that a man can do or say,
To the chaps and fellers and coves Out Back are matters of every day;
Maybe on account of the lives they lead, or the life that their hearts discard—
But never a fool can be too mad or a ‘hard case’ be too hard.
I met him in Bourke in the Union days—with which we have nought to do
(Their creed was narrow, their methods crude, but they stuck to ‘the cause’ like glue).
He came into town from the Lost Soul Run for his grim half-yearly ‘bend,’
And because of a curious hobby he had, he was known as ‘The Stranger’s Friend.’
It is true to the region of adjectives when I say that the spree was ‘grim,’
For to go on the spree was a sacred rite, or a heathen rite, to him,
To shout for the travellers passing through to the land where the lost soul bakes—
Till they all seemed devils of different breeds, and his pockets were filled with snakes.
In the joyful mood, in the solemn mood—in his cynical stages too—
In the maudlin stage, in the fighting stage, in the stage when all was blue—
From the joyful hour when his spree commenced, right through to the awful end,
He never lost grip of his ‘fixed idee’ that he was the Stranger’s Friend.
‘The feller as knows, he can battle around for his bloomin’ self,’ he’d say—
‘I don’t give a curse for the “blanks” I know the hard-up bloke this way;
‘Send the stranger round, and I’ll see him through,’ and, e’en as the bushman spoke,
The chaps and fellers would tip the wink to a casual, ‘hard-up bloke.’
And it wasn’t only a bushman’s ‘bluff’ to the fame of the Friend they scored,
For he’d shout the stranger a suit of clothes, and he’d pay for the stranger’s board—
The worst of it was that he’d skite all night on the edge of the stranger’s bunk,
And never got helplessly drunk himself till he’d got the stranger drunk.
And the chaps and the fellers would speculate—by way of a ghastly joke—
As to who’d be caught by the ‘jim-jams’ first—the Friend or the hard-up bloke?
And the ‘Joker’ would say that there wasn’t a doubt as to who’d be damned in the end,
When the Devil got hold of a hard-up bloke in the shape of the Stranger’s Friend.
It mattered not to the Stranger’s Friend what the rest might say or think,
He always held that the hard-up state was due to the curse of drink,
To the evils of cards, and of company: ‘But a young cove’s built that way,
‘And I was a bloomin’ fool meself when I started out,’ he’d say.
At the end of the spree, in clean white ‘moles,’ clean-shaven, and cool as ice,
He’d give the stranger a ‘bob’ or two, and some straight Out Back advice;
Then he’d tramp away for the Lost Soul Run, where the hot dust rose like smoke,
Having done his duty to all mankind, for he’d ‘stuck to a hard-up bloke.’
They’ll say ’tis a ‘song of a sot,’ perhaps, but the Song of a Sot is true.
I have ‘battled’ myself, and you know, you chaps, what a man in the bush goes through:
Let us hope when the last of his sprees is past, and his cheques and his strength are done,
That, amongst the sober and thrifty mates, the Stranger’s Friend has one.
poem by Henry Lawson
Submitted by Poetry Lover
Vote! | Copy!
A man who has one finger pointing at another has three pointing towards himself.
This movie is a toupee made up to look like honest baldness.
quote by Pauline Kael
Submitted by Lucian Velea
Vote! | Copy!
The Bloke Wot Gits The Girls
'E passes by, each day, at ten
A bottle-shouldered yid
Wot looks as if 'e pushed a pen
An' drawes a weekly quid;
'E's always with some little lass;
(By cripes, 'e gets some pearls!)
We calls 'im, watchin' of 'em pass,
The bloke wot gits the girls.
An' strewth! it beats me outer sight
'Ow girls can stand 'im - straight!
'E don't go five-feet-two in height
Or eight-stun-two in weight;
'E couldn't swing a pick, - or scrap,
Soft 'ands an' sheeny curls!
'E's just a sorter - well, mishap,
The Bloke wot gits the girls.
But yet each day some bit o' fluff
Trips by, with this 'ere fraud,
A-breathin'-in 'is silly guff
As if 'e wos a gawd.
'E shoots 'is cuffs, 'e swings 'is canes,
'Is spiky mo 'e twirls,
'E seems to mesmerise the Janes,
The bloke wot gits the girls!
Well, tarts is tarts - it's 'ow they're built:
I s'pose their gawd is clo'es;
But 'im - the puffed-up piece o' gilt,
I'd like to punch 'is nose!
A-struttin', starin' round about
As if 'is kind was earls!
Cripes! 'Ow I'd like to pass 'im out
The bloke wot gits the girls!
poem by Clarence Michael James Stanislaus Dennis
Submitted by Poetry Lover
Vote! | Copy!