Anyone who goes to a psychiatrist ought to have his head examined.
quote by Samuel Goldwyn
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Any man who goes to a psychiatrist ought to have his head examined.
quote by Samuel Goldwyn
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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This One Is On Me
You want me to
What?
Endure your pain,
As an expression
Of my love and devotion?
You wait right there
'Where are you going? '
To get us both a psychiatrist.
Don't worry about it; the expense!
This one is on me.
Because I can not believe,
You are beginning to make sense.
That's how badly I need my head examined.
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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If I had my way everyone would have a psychiatrist. When the brain is sick and you must throw up, you do it by being purged in a psychiatrist's office.
quote by Hedy Lamarr
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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'The Mark' I played a psychiatrist. And in the '50's everybody went to a psychiatrist because if you didn't, you'd have nothing to talk about at cocktail parties.
quote by Rod Steiger
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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What has not been examined impartially has not been well examined. Skepticism is therefore the first step toward truth.
quote by Denis Diderot
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Obvious Flaws Too Many Wore Like Badges
Examine me!
Go ahead.
I've been 'examined' all my life.
Examined as a child,
In elementary school.
'They are sweet...
And such adorable poor 'project children'
And ridiculed with my sister.
Like we were freaks.
And compared and dehumanized.
In front of white children...
Who were taught to despise us,
Before they took flight to the suburbs.
And did all they could...
To deny both the intelligence,
And rights of Negros where I lived!
Examine me!
You go right ahead.
But I defy you to say...
My deeds are mediocre!
In fact...
Incompetence is something I had long recognized.
As I was being examined.
But I was never thought to be of 'that' kind of mind,
To correct obvious flaws too many wore like badges...
And paraded in the finest of pretentious snob-like fashion.
As I was being examined.
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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I told my wife the truth. I told her I was seeing a psychiatrist. Then she told me the truth: that she was seeing a psychiatrist, two plumbers, and a bartender.
quote by Rodney Dangerfield
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Examined From A Distance
When people fixed with allowed stubbornness,
Have gone overboard...
Inflicted with too much attention given,
While feeding their minds on poisonous adulation...
There will be those assisting without resisting this.
And as accessories refuse an active involvement,
Labelled to be seen but not apologetic.
There is a supporting of needs being fed to feed,
A mindlessness bent beyond control.
And remaining as ignorant as possible...
With senses numbed and flowing into engulfing seas.
And determined...
To supply whatever it is that is wished as a need,
In an atmosphere condoning betrayal and treason.
Deliveries done to quiet the dictates...
Of those spoiled with a getting sought,
With a vicious disregard for dignity and composure.
The soothing of a monster,
Becomes the number one priority!
When people fixed with allowed stubbornness,
Have gone overboard...
Inflicted with too much attention given.
Fantasizing on an achieving of fantastic outcomes...
Seems not to be in the arena,
Where truth and honesty frequently perform....
With every bat of an eyelash examined from a distance.
To that one who is...
Examined from a distance,
This can't be fun.
To be done and this witnessed,
Where can one run...
When it's done.
When it's done.
To be one that's afflicted,
Where can one run...
When it's done.
When it's done.
Examined from a distance,
This can't be fun.
To be done and this witnessed,
Where can one run...
To be one that's afflicted,
Where can one go...
When it's done.
When it's done.
There is a supporting of needs being fed to feed,
A mindlessness bent beyond control.
And remaining as ignorant as possible...
With senses numbed and flowing into engulfing seas.
Examined from a distance...
With senses numbed!
And flowing into engulfing seas.
Where can one run...
To be one this afflicted?
Where can one go...
When it's done.
When it's done.
Examined from a distance!
With senses numbed and flowing into engulfing seas.
Examined from a distance!
With senses numbed and flowing into engulfing seas.
Examined from a distance!
With senses numbed and flowing into engulfing seas.
To be one this afflicted?
Where can one go...
When it's done.
When it's done.
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Finished With Lies
Now Im telling the truth
Im finished with lies, lies
If you dont believe me now
Youll never believe me now
I should have my head examined
Theyll see when they look inside
I wont have to say a word
Ill stop thinking what I shouldnt be thinking
Ill make everyone believe me
Cant you see Im telling the truth
Im finished with lies, lies
If you dont believe me now
Youll never believe me now
Youll think its a lie
Couldnt we just put away the ancient history
Throw up our hands at the unsolved mysteries
Im going to have my head examined
Ill prove you were wrong about me
Move the needle telepathically
Ill turn everything around and confuse you
Talk faster and faster till I lose you
Ill fix it so you cant remember what was true
And therell be nothing to remind you
Starting now Im telling the truth
Im finished with lies, lies
If you dont believe me now
Youll never believe me now
Now Im telling the truth
Im finished with lies, lies
If you dont believe me now
Youll never believe me now
Lies, lies
Youll think its a lie
Youll think its a lie
Youll think its a lie
song performed by by They Might Be Giants
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Every Move You Make
I will always be your friend!
But...
I will not always be accepting,
Of those things you do!
If you are seeking those who will approve,
Every move you make...
To constantly give you a boost,
To make you feel okay about everything you do...
You need to schedule visits to see a psychiatrist.
And I am sure with each visit...
That psychiatrist will show you,
Just how patient they are with you too.
With an expectation of payment.
I will always be your friend!
But...
I will not always be accepting,
Of those things you do!
And you wont have to pay me a thing,
To tell you when or when you are not...
Doing those things that are not suitable or 'cool'.
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Insomnia
The old retired psychiatrist
Professor 'Euphoria' who awakes in the middle of the night.
Nowadays he was copying Idioms.
He complains of an acute pain in his body.
But he is not aware of the exact place.
He visits a young dentist Dr.So-Called
and forced him to extract his cavity tooth?
He did a thorough check and found it was a denture.
Then he said 'Nothing wrong with your teeth
anyhow I'll refer you to the prominent psychiatrist Professor Euphoria?
I have heard about him and his talents
from my patients'.
To poet Martin.Turner
poem by Nimal Dunuhinga
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I questioned her further, and eventually got to talk to her doctor. And her doctor sort of shook his head and he said, 'I have examined her for throat cancer at least 15 times in the past few years.
quote by James Randi
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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In My Head
In my head
voices speak,
Ingrid says,
each one suggesting
different things,
proposing I do this
or that, each voice
distinct from the other.
The Psychiatrist
pares his nails,
gazes at the photo
of his wife and kids,
the silver frame,
the wife with that stupid grin,
and the voice of Ingrid
grating on his ears,
like some whiny cat
shut out in the night
with the heavy rain.
In my head,
Ingrid says,
voices are beginning again.
poem by Terry Collett
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Free Round Trip Tickets
Those in search and seeking explanations,
For hints or clues as to what is going on today.
Are in need of one thing...
Free round trip tickets,
To their favorite amusement park.
With accomodations for two.
And one is required to be a licensed,
Psychiatrist.
'Why are you so sarcastic about this? '
I once had visions.
That came as I slept or kept awake.
They would not go away.
Something inside me said,
'You have the gift of a psychiatrist.
You need to get inside people's heads.
That's where your fortunes lay.'
But I chose to get on people's nerves,
Instead.
And I could have made a fortune doing 'both'.
Who knew it?
I blew it!
Always listen to those inner voices.
That is the best advice today I can give.
However...
Do not make public your arguments.
Being hauled away and locked up,
Could happen.
And this is what one confined will dread.
Unless...
One is at that amusement park,
And accompanied by someone...
Loving the multiple conversations conducted,
In and out of one's bed.
And affording every bit of the expense of it.
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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One should only see a psychiatrist out of boredom.
quote by Muriel Spark
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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I don't need a psychiatrist. I'm Catholic.
quote by Dorothy Kilgallen
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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I'd Be RICH!
I have never felt more examined,
Microscoped and discussed...
Than anytime in my life,
Than 'now'.
From thought process,
To how I digest my food...
To my beliefs and what I pray to,
As if I exist as a novelty.
Sometimes I feel,
That I am an animated mannequin,
For many.
And in 'some' folks eyes,
I can see the surprise when I speak...
With elocution, tone and diction intact.
And no where will I go,
Will I ever forget I am black.
Or...
Should I say African-American,
To be politically correct...
About the whole concept,
Of where folks' heads are at?
I have never felt more examined,
Microscoped and discussed...
Than anytime in my life,
Than 'now'.
And don't think it hasn't occurred to me,
That IF I carried a basketball...
AND tapped danced in a shopping mall.
I'd be RICH!
Even if I didn't have a clue,
As to what I was doing.
All I would have to do is to be entertaining.
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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That's the era we grew up in. It's weak to go to a psychiatrist.
quote by Tanya Tucker
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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With me, nothing goes right. My psychiatrist said my wife and I should have sex every night. Now, we'll never see each other!
quote by Rodney Dangerfield
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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I always say shopping is cheaper than a psychiatrist.
quote by Tammy Faye Bakker
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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