The Woman With Too Many Teeth
The woman with too many teeth was accused of 'smiling too much'
In the office, on the phone
Even when she was on her own [as seen by cctv! ]
The woman with too many teeth would always hesitate and was
Losing weight,
And some got a hunch, that she could not eat her lunch
The woman with too many teeth could barely talk
She also had a funny walk
Due in part to her heavy jaw
She kept her head to the floor
Or covered her mouth with her scarf
As if to muffle a laugh, in a serious place
At funerals and in meetings
So as to 'keep a straight face in disguise]
At weddings and parties she could let herself go
Though her teeth hurt, and she was called a flirt
She left, embarrassed, confused and always alone
Was this her fate?
When she slept, the wind whistled through her top plate
And she almost swallowed her tongue
At the end of her tether, and quite irate
At the 'smiling strangers' blocking up her front gate
She sent them packing,
from jehovahs witnesses.
To refugees from kuwait
And told herself it wasn't too late
To find a twist in the road
That could make her mouth straight
She needed some love and some real understanding
So she tripped on the stairs and had a crash landing
But nothing had shifted except a couple of teeth
And now she was GRINNING in sheer disbelief
She tried to walk out into oncoming traffic
Then to hang by her teeth, by a piece of elastic
But the elastic snapped
So she bunjee jumped
Gripping hard with her molars, that took the full brunt
They fell like white splinters.......
At last she could have ' a serious lunch! '
Somehow she knew there's always a 'happy ever after'
Though she she was toothless and sore,
With both legs in plaster
With a 'serious expression at last
SAYING, PLEASE, NO MORE LAUGHTER! !
T
poem by Yvette Smith
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Related quotes
With Teeth
But she will not let you go
But this time Im not coming back
She will not let you go
But this time Im not coming back
Keeps holding on
She will not let you go
Keeps holding on and on
She will not let you go
No, no, no, no, no!
With teeth
With teeth
With teeth
With teeth
I cannot go through this again /x8
No, no, no, no, no!
With teeth
With teeth
With teeth
With teeth
Youve finally found the place where you belong
It comes on strong
She makes you hard
The rules have changed, the line begins to blur
To what you were
Wave goodbye
With teeth
With teeth
With teeth
With teeth
And it runs deeper than you dare to dream it could be
The black seal
She makes you better than anything youve tried
Its in her kiss
She comes along
She gets inside
song performed by by Nine Inch Nails
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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A Pair Of Smiling Teeth
A pair of smiling teeth, took me by suprise
One miserable november day
Caught by the light that shone from those pearly whites
I was at once diminished in sight
Sore, knocked to the floor
Once bitten twice shy
The smiling teeth bit into my thigh
And then jumped into my bag
They appeared in several anonymous photographs on their own
The smiling teeth arrive without a face
And kept bugging me
Though they remained silent (mostly)
They occasionally snapped back
Like a pair of castanets
The smiling teeth were not easy to forget
The smile was penetrating and fixed
A sinister smile
A horrible monstrous hungry happiness
That pressed down on me from afar
Even when the teetb were trapped in a jar
And thrown out to sea
I could feel that smile pressing down on me
My thin lined lips were beginning to curve at the edges
My teeth pushed through the chaos of my serious state
Until a fix grin emerged from my chin to cheek
So fixed was the grin I lost the power of speech
Nor could I eat no more
That smile those smiling teeth had possessed me
Like a fake hollywood smile on a cheap boardwalk of fame
I smiled an eternal full toothed smile
I never spoke again
poem by Yvette Smith
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The Problem With Teeth
The problem with teeth that are false
Is they don't always ride out their course
They shift when you're eating
Or fly loose at a greeting
Some marriages end with divorce!
The problem with teeth that are false
Is that they won't always lie
In a mouth half their size
And can drive a sane man up the wall
The problem with teeth that are false
Is they don't always ride out life's course
In on a hospital stay they get 'put away'
Until you can't find them at all!
And when they do finally arrive
It's on a woman whose barely alive
Though's she's making a terrible din
But when she smiles she possesses your grin
And it's hard to reclaim them
Because she's renamed them
But the teeth that you've got won't fit in! ! .
The problem with teeth that are false
Is that they rarey survive in life's course
So it's better to brush and religiously floss
So you don't have to lose them at all!
yvette smith
poem by Yvette Smith
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Teeth
English Teeth, English Teeth!
Shining in the sun
A part of British heritage
Aye, each and every one.
English Teeth, Happy Teeth!
Always having fun
Clamping down on bits of fish
And sausages half done.
English Teeth! HEROES' Teeth!
Hear them click! and clack!
Let's sing a song of praise to them -
Three Cheers for the Brown Grey and Black.
poem by Spike Milligan
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A Dental Poem
Natural teeth are best for men;
See the dentist now and then;
Don’t eat more of sugar stuff;
Don’t chew tobacco or puff!
Brush your teeth, both morn and night;
Wear your dentures, smooth and light;
Floss your teeth to rid off food;
Keep your oral hygiene good.
Extract teeth that hurt the cheek;
Let gums not bleed nor turn weak;
Rinse your mouth after a café;
Keep your God-given teeth safe.
Do not drink hot tea / coffee;
Do not eat sweets like toffee;
Let your breath be fresh and free;
Keep your teeth strong and healthy!
Copyright by Dr John Celes 9-9-‘10
poem by John Celes
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The Dentist’s
Your mouth hurts inside for the pain comes from the teeth,
Pain is destructive to the teeth, its gums are bleeding;
Must we learn further help and admiration, or just weep?
First, the aching stops and then the dentist stops,
We all feel murdered, but why?
Firstly, mouths are meant for munching, fully chomping
The food residing in the head, feeding the brain as fast as it can;
We are not dentists, but full doctors, but full nurses,
As hospitals go, we stand firm on our teeth chattering away in the cold.
We felt absurd knowing your teeth.
The main worry was when it made me squirm, and then burn,
Too late, the drill was performed, with too much work,
And that was purity and goodness in the process,
For me, for me, and for those who call themselves the dentist.
We do find teeth a chore, always to be restored.
poem by Naveed Akram
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All I Want For Christmas (Is My Two Front Teeth)
(Donald Yetter Gardner)
All I want for Christmas is my two front teeth
My two front teeth, My two front teeth
Gee, if I could only have my two front teeth
Then I could wish you, "Merry Christmas"
It seems so long since I could say
"Sister, Susie sitting on a thistle!"
Gosh, oh gee, how happy Id be, if I could only whistle
All I want for Christmas is my two front teeth
My two front teeth, My two front teeth
Gee, if I could only have my two front teeth
Then I could wish you, "Merry Christmas"
All I want for Christmas is my two front teeth
My two front teeth, My two front teeth
Gee, if I could only have my two front teeth
Then I could wish you, "Merry Christmas"
It seems so long since I could say
"Sister, Susie sitting on a thistle!"
Gosh, oh gee, how happy Id be, if I could only whistle
(All I want for Christmas is my two front teeth)
(Two front teeth), (two front teeth)
Gee, if I could only have my two front teeth
Then I could wish you, "Merry Christmas"
--- Instrumental ---
It seems so long since I could say
"Sister, Susie sitting on a thistle!"
Gosh, oh gee, how happy Id be, if I could only whistle
All I want for Christmas is my two front teeth
Two front teeth, My two front teeth
Gee, if I could only have my two front teeth
Then I could wish you, "Merry Christmas"...
song performed by by George Strait
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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We Are Jonah
And the round old fox, stepped up to make his speech
His ship was on the rocks, and rescue out of reach
Spotlit he stood, said what he thought he should
Half the crowd did laugh, though there was no joke
And soon the other half were swallowed up in smoke
A robin on the wing, could be heard to sing, the strangest thing
Grandma, we are jonah
Rolling along in the teeth of a whale
Then the plane did land, for some it did not crash
From it emerged a man, in trainers and moustache
Down he laid his load, upon the heated road
Then the road did part, and the tar did melt
He loosened up his heart, he tightened up his belt
Like a piece of string, then he began to sing, like a pearly king
Grandma, we are jonah
Rolling along in the teeth of a whale
Then the scene did shift, to a sun kissed sea
There was montgomery clift, jonah, the whale and me
As the sun it set, montgomery placed his bet
Then the whale did yawn, and fell asleep in four
From dusk till dawn, you shoul have heard him snore
From tierra-del-fuego, to the alaskan snows... there she blows!
Grandma, we are jonah
Rolling along in the teeth of a whale
My dear old grandma, we are jonah
Rolling along in the teeth of a whale
Grandma
We are jonah, rolling along in the teeth of a whale
song performed by by Waterboys
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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We Are Jonah
And the round old fox, stepped up to make his speech
His ship was on the rocks, and rescue out of reach
Spotlit he stood, said what he thought he should
Half the crowd did laugh, though there was no joke
And soon the other half were swallowed up in smoke
A robin on the wing, could be heard to sing, the strangest thing
Grandma, we are jonah
Rolling along in the teeth of a whale
Then the plane did land, for some it did not crash
From it emerged a man, in trainers and moustache
Down he laid his load, upon the heated road
Then the road did part, and the tar did melt
He loosened up his heart, he tightened up his belt
Like a piece of string, then he began to sing, like a pearly king
Grandma, we are jonah
Rolling along in the teeth of a whale
Then the scene did shift, to a sun kissed sea
There was montgomery clift, jonah, the whale and me
As the sun it set, montgomery placed his bet
Then the whale did yawn, and fell asleep in four
From dusk till dawn, you shoul have heard him snore
From tierra-del-fuego, to the alaskan snows... there she blows!
Grandma, we are jonah
Rolling along in the teeth of a whale
My dear old grandma, we are jonah
Rolling along in the teeth of a whale
Grandma
We are jonah, rolling along in the teeth of a whale
song performed by by Waterboys
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Suppressed Anger
it is as if the belly of a woman
is pregnant with a very long snake
and slowly it exits its way
through the esophagus
but you cannot see it first
because the teeth is still gritting
and the mouth is still closed
but on the spur of the moment
when restraint gives way
the mouth suddenly opens
the teeth stops gritting
and the head of that very long snake
comes out
showing its sharp fang
and suddenly
without any talk
bites the object of its
affection.
poem by Ric S. Bastasa
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Kicked In The Teeth
Two faced woman with the two faced lies
I hope your two faced living made you satisfied
Tell me baby I was your only one
While youve been running around town with every mothers son
Told your story about the women like you
Told your story about the things you do
I used to think that you were sugar and spice
I shouldve listened to my mothers advice
Chorus:
Kicked in the teeth again
Sometimes you lose, sometimes you win
Kicked in the teeth again
Aint this misery ever gonna end?
And Ive been kicked in the teeth
Kicked in the teeth again
Two faced woman, such a crying shame
Dont know nothing, youre all the same
You run around, hope you had your fun
You never know whos gonna win till the race been run
Chorus
song performed by by AC-DC
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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On Some White Corpuscles
your teeth are yellow and you say these are healthy teeth
you must envy
these yellow teeth
your eyes are happy, they are smiling till the last day,
and you are proud saying
look, these are happy eyes why not take a picture
of them and copy them
to be your eyes,
your skins are tight and you are too very proud of them
these skins hold my bones and there are no rattlings
in the house of your body
then i ask what is your problem then, why you too
take the walks in the morning?
you said your hemoglobin count is low and you sometimes
faint and your lover is worried always taking you limp
in his arms when you kiss in the dark,
i see, this kind of thing to a man of your lifetstyle,
i need not ask if you have been taking large doses
from his white corpuscles,
from the cartilage between his legs,
something too personal you say
there is no envy somehow
you close your mouth hiding your yellow teeth
with some sauce still
about to dry on the gums,
last night, you say, was the best night you ever had,
something new
fresh and you are frank enought to admit
something that you always eat
and swallow
will not last you a life time
love to you, is always, a temporary, fleeting thing,
a fact too tight like your skin
holding all your dangling bones
poem by Ric S. Bastasa
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As you read these lines
As you read these lines
Another toothpick
Is chewed by my teeth
Something is wrong
With my tongue and
Teeth, how they compete
For recognition, the teeth
Claiming it chewed the
Words the tongue claiming
It approved the taste,
I am listening how they
Argued and quarreled,
And in the chaos I bit the
Toothpick chewed it
And spit it out,
How choppy have I
Become, how some
Of my parts have been
So disjoined, and how
Have I become
So disengaged, divided,
Like the tongue &
Teeth, in their bickering.
poem by Ric S. Bastasa
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The Boy Who Had Buck Teeth
The other boys taunted and jeered at the boy with buck teeth
And they called him rude names as he walked down the street
But the boy with buck teeth is a winner today
Those who laugh last laugh loudest some are known to say
The reason for his success not hard to explain
The boy who had buck teeth has a marvelous brain
Their taunts only fueled his desire to succeed
Of his many successes we hear of and read
The boy who had buck teeth is lauded far and wide
His praises sung far from his home country-side
And those who laughed at him seem ordinary indeed
Their journeys in life to success did not lead
The masses out there they did not impress
But the one they once taunted is a huge success.
poem by Francis Duggan
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I Really Mish My Teesh
I always looked after them whilst growing up,
Until I was about twelve years old,
Now at night they are stored in a cup,
The very thought of that leaves me so cold.
I started adulthood with 32 teeth,
All perfect in every way,
White on top, the same underneath,
Not one of them showed signs of decay.
I brushed them on occasion if I felt the need,
But mostly I left them alone,
Mainly after a bevy or perhaps a feed,
Main thing is they were all my own.
Dental hygiene was there but it wasn't great,
But so what, they weren't that bad,
Despite all the warnings I have to now state,
My attitude was totally mad.
I kept being told I had really bad breath,
But I never took heed of the link,
When they said in truth it smells of death,
I blamed it on the fags and the drink.
I ignored the warnings they were under attack,
A decision I would live to regret,
Before I knew it they were covered in plaque,
With oral problems I was now beset.
I kept getting toothache time and again,
It's an affliction that is truly ill gotten,
How did I manage to stand that pain,
Knowing it was my teeth, which were rotten.
The sweet things the booze and the cigarettes,
Had left my teeth in tatters,
It's entirely my fault as nobody forgets,
Looking after them should be all that matters.
I could no longer smile, as I felt so ashamed,
My teeth were worn out and black,
My gums were sore and terribly inflamed,
Too far gone to find a way back.
I couldn't enjoy my food any more,
Cold drinks were a thing of the past,
Eating anything had became such a chore,
I now wish I had made my teeth last.
Ailments are many when you choose not to brush,
Yet they can all be avoided with ease,
By cleaning every day you will keep them plush
You'll avoid the risk of disease.
Visit the dentist; it's never too late,
They will help you to keep your teeth pure,
Don't listen to those who say, its just fate,
When they're gone there's no miracle cure.
Your adult teeth are the last ones you'll get,
Make sure they stay healthy and clean,
If you treat them well you can safely bet,
You will keep them totally pristine.
It's easy to avoid future dental strife,
All you need do is take care,
You must accept that your teeth are for life,
Look after them and they'll always be there.
I watch them lying in a glass every night,
While I lie hear and suck on my quiche,
Being unable to chew will never feel right,
‘' I Really Mish My Teesh ‘'
Shoehorn With Teeth
He wants a shoehorn, the kind with teeth
People should get beat up for stating their beliefs
He wants a shoehorn, the kind with teeth
Because he knows theres no such thing
He asks a girl if they can both sit in a chair but he doesnt get nervous
Shes not really there
He wants a shoehorn, the kind with teeth
Because he knows theres no such thing
Tour the world in a heavy metal band
But they run out of gas
The plane can never land
He wants a shoehorn, the kind with teeth
People should get beat up for stating their beliefs
He wants a shoehorn, the kind with teeth
Because he knows theres no such thing
Whats the sense in ever thinking about the tomb
When youre much too busy returning to the womb?
He wants a shoehorn, the kind with teeth
People should get beat up for stating their beliefs
He wants a shoehorn, the kind with teeth
Because he knows theres no such thing
song performed by by They Might Be Giants
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Candy candy not so good
Candy candy not so good,
Ouch my teeth hurt,
Candy candy not so good.
Candy candy stuck in my teeth!
Mm..
That lovely taste..
It's just so sweet! !
My mum always tells me 'candy candy not so good, it will hurt your teeth UNDERSTOOD! '
I want candy,
I want to eat,
I don't care what anyone says,
know that candy is the best.
Ouch! Ouch!
Mummy was right!
Because of candy I can't even bite.
Candy candy not so good,
Just remember to brush your teeth because..
Candy candy is not so good..
For your teeth.
poem by Aisha Alansari
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I Remember When My Mouth Was Full
and i too remember when my mouth was full
i still wanted to talk
to you, there was this thought that keeps on bugging me
and it was for you,
that time, when my mouth was full, i wish i could talk
intelligibly, but how could i? when what i had was everything
kept within the four corners of my mouth,
sealed by the fence of my teeth, and the lock is in my tongue,
and my lips, they keep closing, keeping what palatable food was there.
i vomited. no, i did not.
i swallowed them all, Hook
line and sinker. i forgot that i am human.
i thought i was a fish. there were bubbles.
there was that river that swallowed me.
and it too did not talk,
now, i am talking to you. and you are listening.
then what? i have nothing to say.
i am empty.
poem by Ric S. Bastasa
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Open Stage Poetry Reading
After the one that sings, and after the one
that can make up poems of a kind right on the spot;
after a girl who didn't . . . walk very well,
took five minutes to get from her seat to the stage
then read one poem with hardly any words in it
and halted the whole way back in a staggering silence;
after the bald one's rhymes about this teeth;
a woman got up whose poems won't write down,
it's all in the way the voices in her come out.
We went to a medium once, and a woman locked
in a trance let a dead man come inside her and talk.
She held herself like . . . a woman being a man.
That's what it was at the open stage poetry reading,
and I left without talking, I hadn't come expecting it.
What could I have told her, I think it's a dead man?
It wasn't something I wanted to get that close to.
I could never do it myself, let a dead man come in-
or would it be, into me, a dead woman that would come?
poem by Eric Torgersen
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Don’t Leave Your Teeth on a Tray or the Cat Will Play with Them (Fun Poem 44)
This is a cautionary tale,
but I must add that it is true.
Last week my wife after eating an evening meal
decided to remove her bottom plate and put on a tray.
It seemed that it was rubbing against her gums.
Our next-door neighbour came in
and she and Vera retired to the kitchen
to play a game of cards.
After a couple of hands they heard
our youngest cat Charlie playing with something,
they thought it was just one of her toys.
It wasn’t until the next morning
when she went to put her teeth in
that she realised that the toy
Charlie was playing with
were actually her bottom teeth.
The moral of this story
is if you have false teeth,
always put them away
or some passing cat might think
they are a new toy
to have a game with and play.
(12 November 2007)
poem by David Harris
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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