But I think the guys are very happy to accommodate the people and that's part of golf in general.
quote by Bernhard Langer

Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Related quotes
Golf Tees Lament
Golf tees on my dresser
Golf tees in my bed
Golf tees on my pillows
Where they poke me in my head
Golf tees in my closet
Falling from my shirts and pants
Golf tees along the baseboards
Just like army ants
Golf tees in the carpet
And underneath my feet
Golf tees lined up on the mantle
Oh, they look so neat
Golf tees in my couch
And in my back and thighs
When I sit and watch TV
I feel those little guys
Golf tees in the kitchen
In Jurassic coffee mugs
Sometimes when I pass them
They look like prehistoric bugs.
Golf tees in the bathtub
Like sailors on plastic ships
Golf tee in her make-up
Like little bald q-tips.
Golf tees in the attic
Golf tees in the shed
Golf tees, golf tees everywhere
I wonder where they bred?
Golf tees out the backdoor
Like Hansel-and-Gretel’s trails
Golf tees in the flowerbeds
Among the mulch and snails
Golf tees in my car
And underneath the mats
Golf tees in the backseat
Like little baseball bats
But when I am at the golf course
I ask my partner, like a louse…
“May I borrow some of your tees? ”
I left mine at the house!
poem by Larry Buddin

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It's not that there are no masters, but that there are many. And the job of the solicitor general is to balance those masters and to accommodate them all, each in their proper places, wisely and well and in so doing to represent the people of the United States.
quote by Elena Kagan

Submitted by Lucian Velea
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The majority of people who buy homes in golf course communities don't play golf. Golf is way down at the bottom in terms of total numbers and growth.
quote by Ed McMahon

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The Golf Writer (To Kevin)
The golf writer has become famous for a while the toast of the town
But a few locals with him not happy they feel that he has put them down
It's that he has a humorous streak in him and with his words he does not mean offence
Some people in their feelings precious and they lack a bit in common sense,
The golf writer is a nice fellow he likes a good laugh and a beer
His humor comes out in his writing he is a creator of cheer
He never does take life too seriously devoted to family and wife
One might call him happy go lucky he does his best to enjoy life
There ought to be more people like him some do take life too seriously
So down to earth and so very witty and few are as generous as he
So many look forward to his golf column and such witty articles he write
Though always one to feel offended in humor some do feel some slight,
Around the town well known and well liked his best to please others he try
He is such a likeable fellow and he would not harm a fly.
poem by Francis Duggan

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Lies About Tall Guys
Just seems like it’s that way to me
Taller guys seem to get executive jobs
Shorter guys work mostly as clerks
Taller guys never seem to be slobs
Shorter guys always seem to be jerks
Taller guys seem to get all of the action
Shorter guys seem to be quite invisible
Taller guys always seem to deserve satisfaction
Shorter guys are lonely and miserable
Just seems like it’s that way to me
Taller guys just seem born to play sports
Shorter guys kinda seem to like tennis
Taller guys certainly look better in shorts
Shorter guys look like Dennis the Menace
Taller guys are usually at the top of their class
Shorter guys seem to fail quite a lot
Taller guys always seem to kick ass
Shorter guys want to, but simply cannot
sure seems like it’s that way to me
Taller guys get better grades and such
Shorter guys seem to barely scrape by
Taller guys seem to do better, pretty much
Shorter guys always wonder why
Taller guys seem to have eyes like a hawk
Shorter guys seem to wear glasses a lot
Taller guys cover more ground when they walk
Shorter guys, to keep up, have to trot
Sure seems like it’s that way to me
Taller guys and their friends look like N.B.A players
Shorter guys look more like cheerleaders
Taller guys seem to look like dragon slayers
Shorter guys look a lot more like bleeders
Taller guys seem to have more gear to protect
Shorter guys wear more protective gear
Taller guys, more confidence seem to project
Shorter guys have less confidence, more fear
Really seems like it’s that way to me
Taller guys appeal to the female gender
Shorter guys always seem to choke
Taller guys carry a lot more legal tender
Shorter guys always seem to be broke
Taller guys seem to drive high dollar cars
Shorter guys drive toyotas
Taller guys seem to reach for the stars
Shorter guys reach for diet sodas
Taller guys are obnoxious, let’s neuter them all
Shorter guys are great people, always a delight
Taller guys are an abomination against mother nature’s law
If you think I’m a short guy….well, you’re right!
Really seems like the way it should be
poem by David Whalen

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Peace Proposal
Said General Clay to General Gore really must we fight this silly war
To kill and die in such a bore I quite agree said General Gore
Said General Gore to General Clay we could go to the beach today
And have some icecream on the way a grand idea said General Clay
Said General Clay to General Gore we'll build sand castles on the shore
Said General Gore we'll splash and play let's leave right now said General Clay
Said General Gore to General Clay but what if the sea's closed today
And what if the sand's been blown away the dreadful thought said General Clay
Said General Gore to General Clay I've always feared the ocean's spray
And we may drown it's true we may it chills my blood said General Clay
Said General Clay to General Gore my bathin' suit is slightly tore
We better go on with our war I quite agree said General Gore
The General Clay chanrged General Gore as bullets flew and cannons roared
And now at last there is no more of General Clay or General Gore
poem by Sheldon Allan Silverstein

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In general, the Internet was not designed to accommodate deliberate failures to communicate.
quote by Daniel J. Bernstein

Submitted by Lucian Velea
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The Generals
Said General Clay to General Gore,
'Oh must we fight this silly war?
To kill and die is such a bore.'
'I quite agree,' said General Gore.
Said General Gore to General Clay,
'We could go to the beach today
And have some ice cream on the way.'
'A grand idea,' said General Clay.
Said General Gore to General Clay,
'But what if the sea is closed today?
And what if the sand's been blown away?'
'A dreadful thought,' said General Clay.
Said General Gore to General Clay,
'I've always feared the ocean's spray,
And we may drown!' 'It's true, we may.
It chills my blood,' said General Clay.
Said General Clay to General Gore,
'My bathing suit is slightly tore.
We'd better go on with our war.'
'I quite agree,' said General Gore.
Then General Clay charged General Gore
As bullets flew and cannons roared.
And now, alas! there is no more
Of General Clay or General Gore.
poem by Sheldon Allan Silverstein

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They sent me the script, asking me to play the part of a general. I have never played the part of an authority figure. I've never thought of myself that way. I was uncomfortable with it, but I worked at it and knew I had a guttural voice for a general.
quote by Mark Goddard

Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Girls Cant Do What The Guys Do
(reid / clarke)
Ooh, ooh
Guys are gonna wanna go out and play sometime
But girls you must not let it get you down
Just take this advice I give you
Just like a mother
You try to match a guys independence
You end up in the gutter
Girls, you cant do what the guys do, no
And still be a lady
Girls, you cant do what the guys do, no
And still be a lady
No, oh no
And, listen girls when you give your heart away
You can easily be hurt
And the least little wrong he does
Always seems like dirt
So take this advice I give you
Just like a mother
You try to match a guys independence
You end up in the gutter
Girls, you cant do what the guys do, no
And still be a lady
Girls, you cant do what the guys do, no
And still be a lady
No, oh, no, mmm
When you put your faith in one guy
(sometimes hell make you happy)
(sometimes hell make you cry)
Dont lose your self-respect
Tryin to gain revenge
cause no matter how you do it
You lose out in the end
Girls, you cant do what the guys do, no
And still be a lady
Girls, you cant do what the guys do, no
And still be a lady
Girls, you cant do what the guys do, no
And still be a lady
Girls, you cant do what the guys do, no
And still be a lady
Girls, you cant do what the guys do, no
And still be a lady
Girls, you cant do what the guys do, no
song performed by by Dusty Springfield

Submitted by Lucian Velea
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I mean, I can actually say goodbye to the game of golf, never hit another golf shot the rest of my life and I'd be happy because I can get back in life without any rotation.
quote by Greg Norman

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A boxing match is like a cowboy movie. There's got to be good guys and there's got to be bad guys. And that's what people pay for - to see the bad guys get beat.
quote by Sonny Liston

Submitted by Lucian Velea
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386
if there is no place that can accommodate
your sadness,
i know how sweet is the
feeling of departure
you are prepared to spread your wings
but your heart is still as heavy as the weight
of your legs
but then you have the right to fly away
from sorrow
to drift away from lament
happy trip my friend
i send you my blessings
i wish you all the luck to finally reach your destination
happy flying with your wings
but before you finally go
let me know
the secret of your having grown
those pair of big and strong wings
tell me which part of your body
are you hiding your hands
for soon if i have some
i may fly away from
sadness too.
poem by Ric S. Bastasa

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There are some guys out here that can really play golf, but it has not been their focus for that long.
quote by Trent Dilfer

Submitted by Lucian Velea
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I don't feel badly about that. There's a lot of energy on the golf course. The guys are playing great. I like the pairings in the afternoon. I'm going to take what we've got.
quote by Hal Sutton

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Clubs For Lonely People
Wouldn't it be enough
To have magic golf clubs
For lonely people
That would get them friends ample
Whenever they went to play
Using those golf clubs any given day?
I am free to dream
Of a simple magical scheme
To solve a hard to fathom,
Serious problem.
poem by Lonely People Champion

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Fall Out
Words and music by Stewart Copeland
I never thought of leading
I've got my own machine
And I've paid my dues all along
All set for breaking
When I missed those other people
'Cause I knew that I was really alone
Fall out
Fall out with all the leaders and guys
Fall out
Fall out with all the leaders and guys
I saw my education
It was my indocrination
Just to be another parking machine
All my sense was breaking
When I missed those other people
'Cause I knew that I was not very clean
Fall out
Fall out with all the leaders and guys
Fall out
Fall out with all the leaders and guys
Fall out
Fall out with all the leaders and guys
Fall out
Fall out with all the leaders and guys
Fall out
song performed by by Police

Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Hated Shadows
Happy people
with happy faces
Do happy things
in happy places
Little to worry
little to care
Never are sorry
never are there
Through the Viel they live
they cannot see
people around them
people like me
People Invisible
people Divisible
We are not important to happy people
we do not exist
broken shadows of broken people
Happines Glows
Shadows can not exist
With their happy lives
their happy husbands and happy wives
their happy bars
their happy cars
they shine brite
like stars
The shadows
look onto the light with envy
knowing they cannot co-exist
feel hopeless
lost
sedentary
singular
Hated.
poem by Jon Trahan

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Dead Guy Stickers
In the USA,
They want to put dead guy pictures on cigarette packs.
With that brilliant logic in mind, I say put dead guy stickers on:
car windshields(dead guys in wrecks)
pistol and rifle handles (dead guys shot)
marriage licenses (dead spouses)
hamburger and hot dog wrappers (dead fat guys)
pies, cakes (more dead fat guys)
bathroom doors (thousands of dead guys in bathrooms every year)
bicycles (road kill dead guys)
fire places (burnt dead guys)
swimming pools (drown dead guys)
every electrical outlet (fried dead guys)
air plane tickets (dead passenger guys)
the beach (shark bit dead guys)
cities (shot dead guys)
air (blue dead guys)
fish (poisoned dead guys)
motorcycles (more road kill dead guys)
scarfs (strangled dead guys)
football helmets (brain dead guys)
hot tubs (more drowned dead guys)
and so on.
Just about everything can kill you, such as:
Mothers (dead baby guys plus dead fathers)
Fathers (dead baby guys plus dead mothers)
Police(multiple dead guys and chicks)
Drugs (multiple dead guys and chicks)
and so on.
Once everything has a dead guy sticker on it,
You've been warned and the world will be safer, right?
It shows we care, right?
poem by Richard Jarboe

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In order to accommodate to change and to the contrast of phenomena, the intellect does not require any shocks and inner upheavals; it is only through such upheavals that the more conservative mind could accommodate to the metropolitan rhythm of events.
quote by Georg Simmel

Submitted by Lucian Velea
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