Clubs For Lonely People
Wouldn't it be enough
To have magic golf clubs
For lonely people
That would get them friends ample
Whenever they went to play
Using those golf clubs any given day?
I am free to dream
Of a simple magical scheme
To solve a hard to fathom,
Serious problem.
poem by Lonely People Champion
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Related quotes
Golf has become so manicured, so perfect. The greens, the fairways. I don't like golf carts. I like walking. Some clubs won't let you in unless you have a caddy and a cart.
quote by Robert Redford
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Give me golf clubs, fresh air and a beautiful partner, and you can keep the clubs and the fresh air.
quote by Jack Benny
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Golf Tees Lament
Golf tees on my dresser
Golf tees in my bed
Golf tees on my pillows
Where they poke me in my head
Golf tees in my closet
Falling from my shirts and pants
Golf tees along the baseboards
Just like army ants
Golf tees in the carpet
And underneath my feet
Golf tees lined up on the mantle
Oh, they look so neat
Golf tees in my couch
And in my back and thighs
When I sit and watch TV
I feel those little guys
Golf tees in the kitchen
In Jurassic coffee mugs
Sometimes when I pass them
They look like prehistoric bugs.
Golf tees in the bathtub
Like sailors on plastic ships
Golf tee in her make-up
Like little bald q-tips.
Golf tees in the attic
Golf tees in the shed
Golf tees, golf tees everywhere
I wonder where they bred?
Golf tees out the backdoor
Like Hansel-and-Gretel’s trails
Golf tees in the flowerbeds
Among the mulch and snails
Golf tees in my car
And underneath the mats
Golf tees in the backseat
Like little baseball bats
But when I am at the golf course
I ask my partner, like a louse…
“May I borrow some of your tees? ”
I left mine at the house!
poem by Larry Buddin
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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The majority of people who buy homes in golf course communities don't play golf. Golf is way down at the bottom in terms of total numbers and growth.
quote by Ed McMahon
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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For A Round Of Golf
For leisure the game that so many do play
For a round of golf 'tis a beautiful day
By the wide slow flowing river that crawls to the sea
Men and women practice their strokes before their evening tea.
As a boy I believed hobby golfers had easy jobs
And that those who enjoyed golf were well to do snobs
But such antiquated thinking not relevant today
As all kinds of classes the game of golf play.
A beautiful day for a beautiful game
For most hobby golfers with no aspirations to fame
After work they go to the golf course in the evening sun
And play the eighteen holes for the sake of fun.
Of the praises of golf everybody doesn't sing
But for the participants a game without physical contact can be such a fun thing
In the golf course by the river that to the sea crawl
The crack of the iron on the stone hard golf ball.
poem by Francis Duggan
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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If he's got golf clubs in his truck or a camper in his driveway, I don't hire him.
The economics of baseball are the big problem. The big clubs make a lot of money and the little clubs don't.
quote by Fay Vincent
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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The Supreme Court ruled that disabled golfer Casey Martin has a legal right to ride in a golf cart between shots at PGA Tour events. Man, the next thing you know, they're going to have some guy carry his clubs around for him.
quote by Jon Stewart
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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I think doing more live stuff's made us feel a certain way about that particular point. I quite like small clubs. I don't really like playing in big clubs, and I think I'm really into the idea of a few people being together.
quote by Sean Booth
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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I don't like going to the mall. I'm not really like the other girls. I just like to go out on the golf course and play. Golf is fun and feels really good.
quote by Michelle Wie
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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I just picked up golf, it was good, give me a chance to play golf.
quote by Abdullah Ahmad Badawi
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Remarriage(A funny story)
Middle aged Santa and Jeeto were discussing life, and preparing wills. The conversation turned to remarriage...
Jeeto: If I should die first, will you remarry?
Santa: Probably, I wouldn`t like to spend the rest of my life alone.
Jeeto: Would you bring your new wife into our home that we have shared?
Santa: I don`t see why not. It would be empty, you wouldn`t be there.
Jeeto: Would you share the same bed we`ve shared?
Santa: Well, it`s a comfortable bed...
Jeeto: Would you let here wear my clothes?
Santa: Sure, if they fit. They are quite nice.
Jeeto: Would you let her use my golf clubs?
Santa: No way, Preeto(Banta's wife) is left handed.
poem by Edwin Drood
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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031010 Control Yourself
i imagine face of my club
perpendicular to center
of my golf ball, when i hit
to release all my coiled
energy at full speed
it's a learned instinct
that you know if you
have a good contact
by the sound and feel
be calm no matter
what's the outcome
i'm offended by people
smoking cigar while playing
it chokes me, smell lingers
people who show their
temper, slamming clubs
voicing reason for bad shots
you're one of the above
you're the person i
rather not have
poem by Manonton Dalan
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Your Teeth Are Like Upside Down Mountains
teeth like upside down mountains,
eyes like those of a frog big and bulging,
ears like played with playdo,
freckles are like a parker pen explosion,
forehead large and plain like a desert.
nose is like a melting candle.
your legs like golf clubs,
your the most perfect thing i have ever seen,
and you know it.
poem by Not Long Left
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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To Win Another One
People play games to win, not for fun
Otherwise, it’s meaningless
In competitive games like basketball or golf
To win is the primary purpose
While to have fun or make friends is at most the second
Because people need to win to establish confidence and conquer others
It’s victory that excites us, not failure
It’s victory that makes our names familiar to others, not failure
It’s victory that makes us want to play again
It’s victory that tells us not to give up
Not only the human beings
Animals either fight to win and to kill or to be killed
They have no second chance
They have to fight till death
To win or to lose
Is a choice we are facing everyday
Golf masters are having fun all the time
Because they won many tournaments and they are champions
So let’s win another one
And win them all
poem by Michael Guo
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Well, they're Southern people, and if they know you are working at home they think nothing of walking right in for coffee. But they wouldn't dream of interrupting you at golf.
quote by Harper Lee
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Garbage Pick Up
Place your garbage at the side of the road
all that was treasured at one time.
Bikes and some exercise equipment
they had seen their better of times.
Your child has grown up
and your now growing out.
He 's worn off the rubber riding his bike
clothes hung on yours, cause it got too tuff!
Golf clubs never used at all
because dad had that heart attack.
Maybe if he let you come along
you both wouldn't have got so fat?
Garbage pick up man is looking
at all that lay aside the road.
He's looking at it likes it's Christmas Eve
with wealth of gifts untold!
One mans junk is anothers treasure
I've heard someone say.
I guess we shouldn't buy false man made hopes
It's all ends up, Garbage on pick up day!
poem by Linda Winchell
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I played a lot of tough clubs in my time. Once a guy in one of those clubs wanted to bet me $10 that I was dead. I was afraid to bet.
quote by Henny Youngman
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Clubs are so lame. Nobody even dances at these clubs. They stand around and get drunk and they schmooze. There is no enjoyment factor.
quote by Shia LaBeouf
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Singing is not indulged in by Rotary clubs of some countries and all clubs are given full privilege to do as they please about including it in their programs.
quote by Paul Harris
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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