If you got the game, you got the game. That's why Tiger Woods is out there playing golf with Greg Norman.
quote by Shaquille O'Neal

Submitted by Lucian Velea
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IT's THE GOLF BALL OR ME
TIGER TIGER IN THE WOODS
Hit the ball as U should
Ere the Golf Stick skidded
And U in the Woods ended
Tiger Tiger your fame spread far and wide
Many a wallop in joy you with your family cried
Alas your 'misses' your family dread
And many a tear dropp you dead
Tiger Tiger in the Woods the time has come
When Your Wife has given you ultimatum
It's either me or GOLF you choose
And mend your ways or both your loose
'On my terms' if U want the kids and me
Coz I love you so much honey
I am not to touch the GOLF BALL
NOT for LOVE or for MONEY....
TIGER TIGER IN THE WOODS.
poem by Intensive KS1

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I mean, I can actually say goodbye to the game of golf, never hit another golf shot the rest of my life and I'd be happy because I can get back in life without any rotation.
quote by Greg Norman

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So my game is solid. So that obviously makes me feel confident, that like anybody else in this field, you name them, I feel like I've got the ability to win the golf tournament just as much as they have, and that's the way I'm going to take it.
quote by Greg Norman

Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Is there a Tiger in the Woods? or 7 and counting Over Par or Green, Green, Green They Say on the Far Side of the Hill
I was about to not do an observation on the indiscretions of Tiger Woods,
After all, I was with many faults myself.
But being his pubic, uhhm, public image it warrants what people think,
Of his 'coulds', 'woulds' and 'shoulds'.
What a Thanksgiving meal the Woods' had.
After which, at 2: 30 in the Friday morning,
Tiger hit tree, not with a golf ball, but with his Cadillac Escalade.
To add insult to injury, he got into the rough by plowing into a fire hydrant.
That was only the tip of iceberg, so to speak, an continuing charade in a parade.
Tiger Woods wants to be in seclusion right now.
Impossible!
With many women claiming to be his mistresses,
-one in each 'port',
Make that 'tournament'.
The TODAY Show featured a breaking story,
about a woman from Tiger's home,
- that had to go to the hospital for the public knowledge and entertainment.
How many women did Tiger 'birdie'?
7 and counting, Prancer, Dancer, Comet and Cupid-forgive me, wrong story,
(Rachel Uchitel, Jaimee Grubbs, Kalika Moquin, Holly Sampson, Cori Rist, Mindy Lawton, and Jamie Jungers) .
According to Johnny Carson's interview with Jack Nicholas,
A prolific golfer by name,
--did Tiger encounter the same?
Jack Nicholas was being interviewed by Johnny Carson. He asked if there was anything that Mrs. Nicholas did to help her husband. 'She kisses my golf balls before every game.' And Carson answered, 'Doesn't that make your putter flutter? '
Tiger gets $100 million dollars of endorsements per year.
So much for 'skins' game with hardly a cheer.
One should be on the 'fairway' in his or her mind.
Not a sand trap, or in the water, he had appeared to be near-sighted, almost blind.
So much for the Merry Christmas in the Woods' household.
Tiger is going to get coal in his stocking is what I'm told.
12-8-09
poem by Joe Rosochacki

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I don't see myself playing or adjusting my schedule for senior tournament golf.
quote by Greg Norman

Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Hang Down Your Head Kelly Tilghman
This time tomorrow
Reckon where I'll be
Down in some lonesome valley
Hangin' from a white oak tree (The Kingston Trio)
Kelly thought she was being cute,
Kelly thought she had made a funny,
Golf Central would not fire her,
As she is a woman,
Not being Rush, Imus, Jimmy the Greek Snyder,
They were men.
She is of course blonde, so is Caitlin Upton,
Maybe that explains the fact,
Golf Central would not fire her.
She stated that the only way the upcoming golfer would defeat Tiger Woods,
If they would beat him up, like Tonya Harding did to Nancy Kerrigan,
Further more they should 'lynch Tiger Woods in a back alley.'
If the KKK would have been paying her I would understand,
But if, not she could have been playing bedroom course,
She could have been playing on the course where there is easy “lay” on the turf,
She was a caddy to Arnold Palmer,
She could have kissed his balls while he ventured out the first ho’,
That would make his putter stand up.
Golf Central still would not fire her.
(1-13-2008)
poem by Joe Rosochacki

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For A Round Of Golf
For leisure the game that so many do play
For a round of golf 'tis a beautiful day
By the wide slow flowing river that crawls to the sea
Men and women practice their strokes before their evening tea.
As a boy I believed hobby golfers had easy jobs
And that those who enjoyed golf were well to do snobs
But such antiquated thinking not relevant today
As all kinds of classes the game of golf play.
A beautiful day for a beautiful game
For most hobby golfers with no aspirations to fame
After work they go to the golf course in the evening sun
And play the eighteen holes for the sake of fun.
Of the praises of golf everybody doesn't sing
But for the participants a game without physical contact can be such a fun thing
In the golf course by the river that to the sea crawl
The crack of the iron on the stone hard golf ball.
poem by Francis Duggan

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Obviously it's my second senior event, and I'm tired obviously coming back from the British Open, from surgery, which was priority No. 1, did that successfully, and each week since the British Open I've felt in pretty good control of my golf game.
quote by Greg Norman

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Michael left because of the Bulls' management, not because he'd lost his love of playing the game.
quote by Tiger Woods

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The game of golf doesn't come rushing back to you. Last week I made a couple of fundamental mistakes that I probably wouldn't have made in the heat of the battle back when I was in my heyday, and those things have got to come back.
quote by Greg Norman

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I'm not interested at all in playing more than 12, 15 tournaments a year on an annual basis because like all the old guys out here on this Tour, we've played golf for nearly 30 years of our lives.
quote by Greg Norman

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The Game Of Fame
'GOLF-THE GAME OF FAME'
I was watching this golf tournament through the visitor's window
The opening pairs were standing under a big tree's shadow
I had been waiting here to see
Who shall the winner ultimately be?
My two sons were participating, and were outside
There were competing against each other, side by side
First session ended, and the players are now in the second half
I was watching them through the window, including the club staff
Everyone was trying their very best and hard
Well it's not an easy game, just like playing cards
I saw some players taking a short nap
This was some relief time for them and for I, after a gap
The third session of the game goes worst
Till the end of the game, we didn't knows who will be first
The game has begun to ooze
I was still watching them through the window, "Who is go'na loose? "
My two sons were slowly picking on the game
My thoughts were, "Who will earn the coveted fame? "
Opponent players were also moving off at last
I saw my younger one ‘playing pretty fast'
My elder one was rushing down the lane
Why his game slowing down the lane
The competition has become intense and difficult to bear
So, the victory time is getting close and near
Now the game has become fast enough
Oh! My younger son has now found a fluff
Players have now quickened and have hurried by
They seem to be working fast, as if to fly
At last, someone has to be won
Nobody else, it's my younger son
I was watching this golf tournament through the visitor's window
The opening pairs were standing under a big tree's shadow
BY SAMRA HAQ
Being away for the weekends, and me being the international player that I have been for those 30 years, I've spent a lot more time flying around the world, playing different golf tournaments around the world.
quote by Greg Norman

Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Ariel Tiger Woods Play Off
Tiger Woods golf superstar, sex scandal entrepreneur
boasts as winner, of 14 major, golf championships
dominant golf superstar, and sex scandal entrepreneur
allegedly has,14 women, mistress confessionals
but rocker rookie Peterpan, is a less discrete man
boasting to have stroked, more birdies in the hand
his reputation surpasses, Tiger Woods for mistresses
his video proofs run reckless, regardless of consequences
Ariel Peterpan boasts,25 videos, with Indonesian female celebrities
surpassing Tiger Woods, by conquering a harem, of 25 celebrities
Luna Maya and Cut Tari, among videoed conquered, concubine cream
how many women, did Ariel Peterpan not record, falling on his sword?
poem by Terence George Craddock

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Cheap Date
wasted youth on
being wasted
tasting the lips of liars
with checkered pasts
playing the game
not playing the game
being game
taming
the shrew
I liked to shop
hunting for bargains
hunting for game
game over
he was no bargain
what is the price
you'll pay?
at what cost?
poem by L.K. Thayer

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My doctor asked me how many golf balls I had hit in my career. I'm lying there in bed calculating somewhere between four and five million golf balls I had hit to do that on my body.
quote by Greg Norman

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There are no maladies in my golf game. My golf game stinks.
quote by Jack Nicklaus

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My main focus is on my game.
quote by Tiger Woods

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Tiger in the wood
There is a tiger in the woods
With such an attitude
There is a tiger in the woods
Do not stay out there in the nude
There is a tiger in the woods
Alternating between humble and rude
There is a tiger in the woods
Looking for its prey, so pray
Soon will be injurious what was once good
Ready and steady he sets about to slay
The brave who protrude along his way
There is a tiger in the wood
Thinking about you as food
A known serial killer
Seeking a bestial thriller
There is a tiger in the wood
Whose beautiful stripes, I conclude
Put you off guard. Understood?
Such display, I call the tiger’s interlude.
Copyright 2006 - Sylvia Chidi
poem by Sylvia Chidi

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Just Some Names Of Sports Legends
The G A A fans have their own heroes of for to sing
In Gaelic Football Mick O Connell in Hurling Christy Ring
In Boxing Sugar Ray Robinson knew of Worldwide fame
And Babe Ruth's lives on as a great Baseball name
In Soccer Maradona and Pele and George Best
Were never found to be wanting when put to the test
And in Tennis Maureen Connolly the legendary Little Mo
The greatest of her time six decades ago
The A F L fans have Leigh Matthews for to talk about
Their game's greatest player though that not without doubt
And golf has Norman, Nicklaus, Woods, Watson and Gary Player
Of their game's major honours they took the lion's share
And athletics have Nurmi and Zatopek, Owens and Flo Jo
Legends that most sports fans of surely would know.
poem by Francis Duggan

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