Dear friends, we surely all agree
'Dear friends, we surely all agree
There's almost nothing worse to see
Than some repulsive little bum
Who's always chewing chewing gum.
(It's very near as bad as those
Who sit around and pick the nose).
So please believe us when we say
That chewing gum will never pay;
This sticky habit's bound to send
The chewer to a sticky end.
Did any of you ever know
A person called Miss Bigelow?
This dreadful woman saw no wrong
In chewing, chewing all day long.
She chewed while bathing in the tub,
She chewed while dancing at her club,
She chewed in church and on the bus;
It really was quite ludicrous!
And when she couldn't find her gum,
She'd chew up the linoleum,
Or anything that happened near–
A pair of boots, the postman's ear,
Or other people's underclothes,
And once she chewed her boy friend's nose.
She went on chewing till, at last,
Her chewing muscles grew so vast
That from her face her giant chin
Stuck out just like a violin.
For years and years she chewed away,
Consuming fifty packs a day,
Until one summer's eve, alas,
A horrid business came to pass.
Miss Bigelow went late to bed,
For half an hour she lay and read,
Chewing and chewing all the while
Like some great clockwork crocodile.
At last, she put her gum away
Upon a special little tray,
And settled back and went to sleep–
(She managed this by counting sheep).
But now, how strange! Although she slept,
Those massive jaws of hers still kept
On chewing, chewing through the night,
Even with nothing there to bite.
They were, you see, in such a groove
They positively had to move.
And very grim it was to hear
In pitchy darkness, loud and clear,
This sleeping woman's great big trap
Opening and shutting, snap–snap–snap!
Faster and faster, chop–chop–chop,
The noise went on, it wouldn't stop.
Until at last her jaws decide
To pause and open extra wide,
And with the most tremendous chew
They bit the lady's tongue in two.
Thereafter, just from chewing gum,
Miss Bigelow was always dumb,
And spent her life shut up in some
Disgusting sanatorium.
And that is why we'll try so hard
To save Miss Violet Beauregard
From suffering an equal fate.
She's still quite young. It's not too late,
Provided she survives the cure.
We hope she does. We can't be sure.'
poem by Roald Dahl
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Related quotes
Chewing Gum
chewing gum
wondering where i've been and what i've done
wondering where i'll go and where i'll run
hide myself away from everyone
chewing gum
doesn't ['does it'] bother you that you're not the one
keeps you up at night in a fear of dream
to count the silver bullet of your misty
it's yours to keep
chewing gum
innocence lost in electric smiles
perfectly cast in desperate clouds ['colds']
loving with under
city lights
with all their {miles}
and all i need
is you
by my side
by my side
by my side
chewing gum
wondering where i've been and what i've done
wondering where i'll go and where i'll run
hide myself away from everyone
chewing gum
got myself a piece of
chewing gum
got myself a piece of
chewing gum
got myself a piece of
chewing gum
got myself a piece of
chewing gum
song performed by by Smashing Pumpkins
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Chewing Gum (Fun Poem 46)
I enjoy chewing gum
it takes my mind off cigarettes,
but because I have false teeth.
(I lost the real ones years ago)
Chewing gum become like chewing super glue.
When it sticks, boy does it stick.
You stand in the bathroom
completely and utterly gummy
scraping the gum of your dentures.
So now, my motto is
if you have dentures
suck on a hard-boiled sweet,
they don’t stick to your teeth.
poem by David Harris
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Our Cow
Down by the slipralls stands our cow
Chewing, chewing, chewing,
She does not care what folks out there
In the great, big world are doing.
She sees the small cloud-shadows pass
And green grass shining under.
If she does think, what does she think
About it all, I wonder?
She sees the swallows skimming by
Above the sweet young clover,
The light reeds swaying in the wind
And tall trees bending over.
Far down the track she hears the crack
of bullock-whips, and raving
Of angry men where, in the sun,
Her fellow-beasts are slaving.
Girls, we are told, can scratch and scold,
And boys will fight and wrangle,
And big, grown men, just now and then,
Fret o'er some fingle-fangle,
Vexing the earth with grief or mirth,
Longing, rejoicing, rueing -
But by the slipralls stands our cow,
Chewing.
poem by Clarence Michael James Stanislaus Dennis
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I found out was, by the rhythm of my chewing, how I chewed fast, slow or what have you, I could tell the audience what my character was thinking and feeling.
quote by Rod Steiger
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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To Be Courteous
to be courteous
to this society where i live
i pocket my smile
i swallow my pride
you see me chewing a gum
and you order me
to swallow it
because you don't like seeing me
chewing this mint
i swallow it
in your name
and behave as though nothing happened
no i will not tell anybody
i will not tell about you or your name
i will not retaliate
i will just write
this poem
if you call this a poem at all
this shame
and this shamelessness of you
poem by Ric S. Bastasa
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Wishy Washy
I bit and sucked
your sweet words
like chocolate spread fingers
until you glued on my shoes
like a chewed chewing gum
poem by Cold September
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Where's Mo?
Three meerkats stood on tippy-toes,
Eeeney, Meeney, Miney...
And yet, where's Mo? Nobody knows!
Where could that rascal be?
They thought that he was hiding near,
That's why they stretched so high,
In hopes the scamp would soon appear,
So they could ask him why...
But Mo was chewing chocolate fast
And wouldn't share one bite!
At such a thought, he felt aghast,
He chewed with all his might!
They'll all want some, there's not much left!
And so he chewed and chewed...
When it was gone, he felt bereft,
It was his favourite food!
His whiskers had to be licked clean
To hide the damning truth,
The awful fact that he was mean,
With chocolate as the proof!
When he returned, he burped aloud!
The meerkats gathered round...
But Mo was silent with head bowed...
And while he smiled, they frowned!
The poem is based on the magnificent painting
by Stephen Gayford called 'Where's Mo? '.
poem by Denis Martindale
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Aunt marjorie's wig
Aunt Marjorie's wig went a missin
While cooking a stew and reminiscing
She recalled her first kiss
as a bit hit and miss
With a fidgety midget from gissing
As she filled her meat pie
She started to cry
Cos the onion was burning a lot
It tasted quite bitter she thought with a titter
As she laughed in plopped her locks
Feeingl much lighter
she skipped and she hopped
Unware of her missing hairpiece
Though her head was much smaller
She could not recall when her wig found it's silent release
Short sighted from birth she stood by the hearth
And drank til she barely could stand
And without looking
she devoured her cooking
Bit by bit she gorged on each strand
Not knowng what she was doing
She just kept on chewing and chewing
Forcing the last dreg of the wig with her hand
She lay on her bed feeling quite overfed
With light shiny spot on her head
She turned over and over with a pain in just below her
Not sure of how long it would last
So she went to the loo
And after a BIG NUMBER 2
She saw a large hairy hat floating past! !
poem by Yvette Smith
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Don't let your special character and values, the secret that you know and no one else does, the truth -- don't let that get swallowed up by the great chewing complacency.
Don't let your special character and values, the secret that you know and no one else does, the truth - don't let that get swallowed up by the great chewing complacency.
If you see the picture when things get exciting, he chews faster. When he really gets shocked, everything stops, including the chewing. So I worked it in for me.
quote by Rod Steiger
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Daydreamer's rattle
Isolation - a solution?
Or a trap that captures you?
People passing,
Laughing, fussing,
Ever strange and never new...
Cruel longing never learning
What it means not being free;
Chewing, grazing,
Ever gazing...
One or two, but seldom three...
I... so late... Er... Salute!
12 March,2001
poem by Larissa Izergina
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A Sort Of A Poem Upon Arriving At The Mountain Hut
where it is? the native points to the place
using his nose. It is just near he said while chewing his betel nut.
we pass three winding rivers
and five hills on footpaths with mud and grass as tall as us along the way.
we finally arrive at the foot of a hill
below it a nipa hut
there is no one there
i curl up and take my sleep
meanwhile the fog swallows everything
just us.
poem by Ric S. Bastasa
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Toledo
Three widows of the Middle West
We're grimly chewing gum;
The Lido chef a quail had dressed
With garlic and with rum,
And they were painfully oppressed
For they had eaten some.
Said One: "This famed El Greco guy
Gives me the blessed pip;
Them Saints look like they want to die -
Let's give our guide the slip,
And in some bodega close by
A glass of vino sip."
Said Two: "It's this Cathedral stuff
That fairly gets me down.
I think one church is quite enough
In any Spanish town;
But here there's four - that's pretty tough
No matter their renown."
Said Three: "It's that Alcázar show
That simply knocked me out;
That dismal dungeon down below,
Then ruins all about;
That funny, fat old Moscardo
Who put the Reds to rout."
Hey, Mister Guide! implored the Three,
"Return to gay Madrid."
The guide was shocked, but trained was he
To do as he was bid.
So three dames of the Middle West,
Dyspeptically glum
Went back to town, and quite depressed
The guide was chewing gum.
poem by Robert William Service
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TV is chewing gum for the eyes.
quote by Frank Lloyd Wright
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Chew Chew Chew (Your Bubble Gum)
Ella Fitzgerald - Chew Chew Chew
[Instrumental Intro 55 seconds approx.]
[Ella]
Chew Chew Chew Chew
Your Bubble Gum
Chew Chew Chew Chew
Your Bubble Gum
Chew Chew Chew Chew
Your Bubble Gum
Chew Chew Chew Baby
[Repeated x2]
First you pop, then you stop
The gum gets big and round.
Blow your troubles,
Way like bubbles
When you hear that
Funny little sound [pop noise]
Chew Chew Chew Chew
Your Bubble Gum
Chew Chew Chew Chew
Your Bubble Gum
Chew Chew Chew Chew
Your Bubble Gum
Chew Chew Chew Chew Your Bubble Gum!
[Boys]
Listen Sis your havin fun,
Chewing on your bubble gum
Give us some and we shall see,
Just what fills your heart with glee
[Ella]
Boys your right Im havin fun
Chewin on my bubble gum
Bubble gum it makes me sing,
Here chew some to make you swing!
[Instrumental]
First you pop, then you stop
The gum gets big and round.
Blow your troubles,
Way like bubbles
When you hear that
Funny little sound [pop noise]
song performed by by Ella Fitzgerald
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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It's just a show. It's not the end of Western Civilization. It's chewing gum.
quote by Jerry Springer
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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