I Use To Settle For You, Until I Realized I Deserve Better
i use to like you,
becuz i thought,
that i couldn't be liked,
now that i'm seeing who i am,
i'm realizing that i deserve better,
not to sound me but,
my needs wasn't being met,
but yet,
you wanted me there everytime,
that you seem to have a problem,
i gave you advice and supported you,
yet when i need advice,
all you can say is,
'it my fault' or 'ok'
there was really,
nothing that i got from it,
i got told i was beautiful,
and that you liked my clothes,
but it never felt like you ment it,
it always felt like it what you had to say,
i like the truth,
or for you to at least feel like you ment it,
not for it to feel presurre to say,
either this is all new,
or i'm just now seeing what i want,
and this here just not it,
i know i rushed it abit,
i was afraid that what i had found,
with somebody else is what i want,
it all something new,
this person i feel like me for me,
not becuz i can do things better,
but in a way,
it was the only way i knew how to be,
until i found a better way to be,
i don't have to give it all away,
just to be liked,
i can actually be me,
and take it slow,
who doesn't like being who they were ment to be?
poem by Mona Martinez
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Related quotes
Still believing lies
you told me i will never amount to nothing,
it's a lie i still believe,
i can't blame that i'm still a child,
even though at times i still feel like one,
everything that you did to me,
messed me up in more ways than i can say,
i know you didn't think twice,
about what you did to me,
you were only worried that you would get caught,
you knew it was wrong and you still did it,
now i'm left picking up the pieces,
and trying to fix my life the way i want it,
it's a struggle but i'm getting through it,
i'm still angery at what you did to me,
that would never go away,
like ppl say it will,
becuz i am reminded everytime i'm triggered,
it sad that a real man,
have to stand up and tell me,
that everything i'm going through,
was not my fault,
i continue to blame myself,
cuz it was what you told me,
i was sexy,
i make you feel a certain way,
i was a child,
how did i make you feel sexual towards me,
when i didn't even know what that was?
you made it my fault,
just so you won't feel bad,
about what you wanted to do,
i didn't deserve to be treated like a toy,
i didn't deserve to feel such fear,
for having and opinion,
that was different than yours,
but i did,
everything i felt,
i thought i deserved in some way,
the guilt, shame, and helplessness,
i carried it everyday,
and kinda didn't know why,
the more i open up,
the more i discover the person,
that i have been so afraid to get to know,
the more everything you said to me,
is starting to disappear.
poem by Mona Martinez
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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So Sorry
IM SO SORRY
HOPE YOU CAN FORGIVE ME
I LOVE YOU
IM SORRY FOR EVER HURTING YOU
IM SORRY FOR EVERY LOVING YOU MORE
IM SO SORRY
IM SORRY FOR PUTTING YOU THROUGH THE PAIN
IM SORRY FOR EVER MAKING YOU SAD
IM SORRY FOR FIGHTING WITH YOU
IM SORRY FOR KEEPING SECERTS FROM YOU
IM SORRY I LOVED YOU MORE THEN ANYONE
IM SORRY FOR THIS
I NEVER MENT FOR THIS TO HAPPEN
I NEVER MENT TO MAKE YOU FEEL THE WAY YOU FEEL
IM SORRY FOR EVERYTHING I DID
I HOPE YOU CAN FORGIVE ME AND
GIVE US ANOTHER TRY
I LOVE SO MUCH AND I HOPE YOU KNOW THAT
ILL MISS YOU
NO MATTER WHAT
YOU WILL BE ON MY MIND
IM SORRY FOR EVERYTHING THAT HAS HAPPEN
I NEVER MENT TO DO ANYTHING LIKE THIS
I NEVER WANTED TO HURT YOU IN THE WAY I DID
I LOVED YOU SO MUCH FROM WHEN WE
FIRST SAY EACH OTHER
IM SO SORRY I HOPE YOU KNOW THAT
I LOVE YOU IM SORRY
PLEASE FORGIVE ME
so sad without him by myside wish i didnt do the things i did or say the things i said
poem by Rachel Watson
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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I keep coming back to you
i open up and talk about my past,
i tell you why i just can't do certain things,
why i will never be a normal girl,
you make it about you,
saying it's all your fault,
you feel like a jerk,
it had nothing to do with you,
it was a selfish jerk,
that had no right to touch me,
when i was a child,
a few days go by,
we start to talk again,
as if everything is back the way it was,
only it wasn't,
what i shared was so personal,
i hardly share it unless i feel i can trust you,
it only feels like now,
you will do anything to avoid me,
like it was my fault,
i felt like a reject,
like it was my fault in some way,
but i was a child,
what could i have done?
you say things that get me coming back,
in the back of my mind,
i know you only want me becuz you are lonely,
what kind of fool am i?
to keep coming back to something that will never work,
i never get my needs met,
and yet i pretend like i don't care,
when slowly it eating me up inside,
i can only be what you want me to be,
just like in my past,
no wonder this is working out great for you,
if i had my cake and eat it too,
i will be happy as well,
but since i can't,
not being with you is the best it gets,
you have been my friend all of these years,
and i must know more about you,
than you know about me,
at first i thought it was becuz i wasn't opened,
it was as if you didn't care,
unless i dealt and sovled your problems.
poem by Mona Martinez
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I sit alone...
I sit alone
becuz i lost all my friends,
i sit alone
becuz no one likes me,
i sit alone
becuz i hate my life,
i sit alone
becuz i want to kill everyone around me,
i sit alone
becuz no one ever see's me anymore,
i sit alone
becuz my soul is dead! !
poem by Katie James
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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I'm trying to be open, but the past keep creeping in
i'm only human,
don't get mad,
i don't feel normal,
but i'm doing the best i can,
what you want is this perfect girl,
i don't think i will ever be her,
i'm a girl who numb her feeling,
just so i won't have to feel the pain,
the problem is not really you,
nor is it me,
i was delt a bad hand,
in this thing we call life,
i want to be what you see in me,
it just hard,
when my feelings over take my mind,
i freeze up,
but it's hiding behind my smile,
i don't let you see,
becuz i'm afraid that if i do,
you won't look at me,
the way you have been,
that look you get in your eyes,
is what makes me want to be a better person,
you see, what i'm too blind to see,
and yet, i'm worried that you might judge,
judge me for a past, i had no control over,
it makes me sick to think,
a grown guy can do that to a child,
turn them into their sex puppet,
it makes me sick just thinking about it,
but in my eyes i'm looking at you,
as if you are my abuser,
you are nothing like him,
and yet i'm so afraid to let you in,
let you get close,
i tell myself things that are not true,
just so i have a way out,
a way out of feeling the thing from the past,
but no matter what,
i'm pulled back into your charm,
who can resist?
i love your personality,
but it's what triggering my past memories,
i feel like i'm not normal,
becuz i'm afraid of anything sexual,
it shouldn't have to be this way,
but sadly it is,
i guess all i can say is,
i'm only human,
i don't always have to be perfect,
i can only be me,
it wasn't my fault,
what happened in my past,
all i can do is move on and learn.
poem by Mona Martinez
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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A Message To Mom
i remember the day you left,
in a blink of an eye,
you just died,
what the hell happened?
life felt pointless,
i felt helpless,
things never change,
days goes by,
i feel the same,
remembering how much
you ment to me,
makes me cry,
you can't be by my side,
helping me each day,
to help me through,
i'm left finding out what to do,
having doubts along the way,
make me hate every day,
what i feel about you never goes away,
i just find other ways to spend them,
life so empty,
with everything gone,
what do you do?
a mothers life is always special,
would you agree?
what about the daughter
that was left behind?
left before she found herself,
can you relate?
to a life so down,
and things she have to take on,
never thought the day would come,
when i have to say,
i love you mom,
will you ever be back?
Copyright © 2009
3-10-09
poem by Mona Martinez
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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You Were The Adult, I Was Just A Kid
you had control,
you made me feel special,
but something wasn't right,
questions were floating around,
of why i did the things i did,
the more there was,
the more secretive you became,
told me we couldn't continue,
if my parents found out,
but it didn't feel right,
you told me my parent would think i was lying,
guess what?
they did,
i created a war,
things gotten hard,
it was easy for me to admit i was lying,
than for ppl to question my judgement,
i was a kid,
you had a edge,
kids lie, easy out,
you made me depend on you,
and for what?
what did you ever do to me?
besides take advanage and kick me to the side,
you hurted me, in ways i couldn't understand,
until now, you coward,
couldn't admit to your actions,
because you,
know they were wrong,
and now becuz of you,
i understand why i don't trust,
it was one thing you took from me when i was young.
poem by Mona Martinez
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Words are not just words
i'm confused and lost in my thoughts,
but what you said,
really had affected me,
i felt like a prize ppl want,
once they get it,
there will be nothing else,
that they would want,
never knew words can hurt so much,
words were how my abuser,
knew how to get me to stay,
all of the lies he told,
it was so easy to believe,
becuz they hurt,
they still haunt me,
i admit that i still compare ppl,
from time to time,
it what i need to work on,
i hate that when somebody do,
one wrong thing,
i hold them accountable,
but yet why do i feel so bad,
when ppl have the right to pick their actions,
why do i think i'm the one to blame,
i did nothing wrong,
i feel guilt and shame,
what i have always felt all my life,
i continue to let ppl off easy,
when they hurt me,
i suck it up,
and pretend it don't hurt,
but at times,
i would rather cut myself,
just so i won't have to feel the pain,
and wonder what i did wrong to deserve it,
there are times i know i deserve better,
but the pain from the past,
attract me to ppl who don't know what they have,
until it gone.
poem by Mona Martinez
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Love Is Only Blind When We Don't Want To See The Truth
it just funny,
how some guys will choose,
girls they don't know,
draw them in,
and mess with them,
they make you feel special,
make you feel like the one,
it all happens so quick,
you think it was love,
but love can be blind,
we see what we want,
until it catches up with us,
and we wonder how we got in this mess,
we think it becuz the guy loved us,
but in reality,
all they wanted was,
to turn us into what they want,
they want us to be there puppet,
not there one and only,
if that was the case,
they would want to take their time,
open us like a present,
and charish us,
not use, change and throw away,
we are better than that,
to be treated by a guy,
with little respect,
we only take it,
becuz we feel lucky to find us somebody,
who cares and open there heart,
but when you listen closely,
you realize how selective they are,
telling you what you want to hear,
and in the end,
they want you to accept their past,
but it seems like they can't accept your,
selfish people don't deserve good people,
but you see it happen,
in more ways than none,
but the only person that can stop it,
is the person that is in,
this type of relationship.
poem by Mona Martinez
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Darlin I
I realize that now our love is past
Tried so hard to make it last
Feelings are far gone
They seem to fade away
But yet I can hear him say
We did try, tried our best
To make it through those times
Lets stop, dont go any further
cause I need some time
Darlin I know you never ment to make me cry
I never understood your reasons why
And darlin I know you never ment to make me cry
These lonely nights without you
I guess its goodbye
And I never thought that I would hear you say
I should go on my own way
Tell me, cant you see the changes
That you put me through
I wonder if you really knew
How much I tried my best to make it
Through those times
But you said stop, dont go any further
cause I need more time
Oh, baby and...
Darlin I know you never ment to make me cry
I never understood your reasons why
And darlin I know you never ment to make me cry
These lonely nights without you
I guess its goodbye (goodbye)
Darlin I know you never ment to make me cry
I never understood your reasons why
And darlin I know you never ment to make me cry
These lonely nights without you
I guess its goodbye (goodbye)
Written by salas/harris
song performed by by Vanessa Williams
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Get It Now
Get it now
Don't you see
I use to think
That mom and dad were ment to last
But now I know mom and dad fight
And its better this way
Get it now
Don't you see
Mom I love you
Dad I won't forget you
But you two were never ment to be
I wish there was another way
Get it now
Don't you see
That you two are our world
But both not in our lives
That way it use to be
It hurt us so to know
Get it now
Don't you see
Dad you mom wil never be
Mom you can make it on your own just try
Get it now
Don't you see
poem by Chelsi Lewellyn
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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20. Th Century
In the beginning
There was no light
No teenage heaven or hell
No songs or voices came from across the outlands
Where oceans were ment to be, where oceans were ment to be
Oh my god, I feel so alone
Some million lightyears far from home
How about you who are living in the 20th century
Carol
You better stop to get the tickets for the starlite show
Everybody wants to be there
What a dream
So if you dont mind, will you join me
On my way through the eye
Up to the light
Into the world
Gold/1985
song performed by by Alphaville
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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He Said I Said Sister Said
HE SAID FOREVER
I SAID NEVER
SISTER SAID WHAT EVER
HE SAID LEND ME YOUR HAND
I SAID DO YOU HAVE A BRAIN
SISTER SAID HOW COULD THIS BE
HE SAID WHY DON'T YOU TRY
I SAID B/C YOU ALWAYS LIE
SISTER SAID YOU NEVER TOLD ME WHY
HE SAID I NEVER MENT TO HURT YOU
I SAID THE TEARS I CRYED IN THE NIGHT
SISTER SAID MAYBE HE NEVER MENT TO MAKE YOU CRY.......
poem by Brenda Dillishaw
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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My First Hurt
I see myself in the past and I dont want to return
From those days those mistakes I have caught to have learned
But why do I still feel the pain
See day by day I tried to get over you
Just to have found out what people had said about you was true
But why do I still feel the pain
Is it because I told you since they day that we met
I wanted you to be the one I wont ever forget
Is that why I'm starting to feel the pain
Or was it cuz I still wanted you for me
But you were married you see
Is that why I'm starting to feel the pain
You took the one thing special I had away
After that is when I felt the most ashamed
Because it is now more than ever that I have felt HURT and PAIN
The pain you gave me that day
The pain you gave me the next
The pain that you had nothing to say
Or just the worst pain that in the end all you wanted was SEX! ! !
poem by Vicky Jaimes
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Love Should Never Feel Like This
Somebody told me love's a beautiful thing
And when I found it all the bells would just ring
The sun would shine and all the birds would sing
Then I met you
I searched the planet for that magical girl
I walked a million miles all over the world
I found the oysters, but never the pearls.
Then I met you...
I can't eat
I can't sleep
I feel sick
I'm so weak
Love should never feel like this
I must be doing something wrong
I've never felt this way before
Walk in the bathroom and I take a deep breath
Look in the mirror and it scares me to death
Look like a junkie that's been strung out on meth
Since I met you
I can't eat
I can't sleep
I feel sick
I'm so weak
Love should never feel like this
I must be doing something wrong
I've never felt this way before
Love should never feel like this
I must be doing something wrong
I never felt this way before
Oh, ignorance was always bliss
Love should never feel like this
Love should never, ever feel like this
I've never felt this way before
I must be doing something wrong
No, Love should never, ever feel like this
I must be doing something wrong
I've never, ever felt this way before
What's wrong with me!
song performed by by Alice Cooper
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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You'll Get There
(Since you wanted me, Since you wanted me)
I woke up late this morning
She said she wake me up
I woke up to discover,
This wasn't in my home,
Don't believe your heroes
They take you for right.
Don't believe the dangers before you kiss the sky.
And don't believe me,
I'm a liar,
You'll get to me in the end...
I feel your heaven
Never felt it before,
Ill breathe in the ocean,
And I want you to know
Ill feel your heaven
Never felt it before,
Ill breathe in the ocean,
And I want you to know
I woke up late this afternoon feeling so alive (since you wanted me)
The sensations you gave me,
They've, rearrived
Don't believe these angels,
They'll take you for right
Don't believe the dangers
Before you kiss the sky.
And don't believe me
I'm a liar
You'll get to me in the end...
I feel your heaven
Never felt it before,
I breathe in the ocean,
And I want you to know
I feel your heaven
Never felt it before,
I breathe in the ocean,
And I want you to know
Whisper:
Every time I look at you,
I see myself inside your eyes,
And I despise my own reflection looking back at me,
And I remember when I promised that I'd never walk away from you,
Right now I have to live with what i've done to you and what I have
become,
I am a liar
And the fire is not burning,
But when I lie awake at night it's you who is my final fault,
I live for you,
I die for you
I dream for you
I'll give everything to bring you back and let you know
That I will never flee from you
I feel your heaven
Never felt it before,
I breathe in the ocean,
And I want you to know
I feel your heaven
Never felt it before,
I breathe in the ocean,
And I want you to know
song performed by by Inme
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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I'm Sorry Your So Happy
I'm sorry that I'm so scared
I'm sorry you cried my tears
I'm even sorry that you were
so glad to be with me
I'm sorry to've led you on
I'm sorry that I'm so worn
I'm even sorry for trying to be good to you
I'm sorry you felt so safe
I'm sorry for all your love
I'm even sorry to've been your inspiration
For everything you did for me
My firends and my family
Even strangers who I thought
could use a helping hand
For all the love you gave to me
The dreams that you shared with me
But most of all, I'm sorry that
I couldn't love you
I'm sorry for the good times
And the joy that I made you feel
The satisfaction that you got
From being close to me
I'm sorry for the laughter
For holding your gentle hand
And making you feel
so damned lucky
For every smile that I gave to you
And every kiss that you received.
But most of all, I'm sorry that
I couldn't love you
For every gift you received
Sent, but not with love, rather
The belief that I was doing the
Right thing
I'm sorry to've made you feel
That you were lucky
For having found me
Or comfortable now that you'd
Found love
I'm sorry I couldn't trust you
But wouldn't tell you how I felt
I'm sorry that you believed I
needed you or something
I'm sorry that, I'm sorry, so sorry that
I just couldn't love.
poem by Njeri Bondagebreak
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Learning To See
Time after time we
Walk pass the window
But never see the ashes on the ground
Night after night
Watching the sky move
Never feel the earth spinning 'round
I didn't see you fallin'
I couldn't hear you callin'
Born with eyes wide open never learn to see
I never ment to hurt you
Was right there crying with you
Why do we harm the only thing we want to be
Trying to follow
Every footstep
I feel so lost along the way
Reading the scripture
Straight from the gospel
Never understanding what they say
I didn't see you fallin'
I never heard you' callin'
I've got my eyes wide open
but haven't learned to see
Yeah
I never ment to hurt you
Was right there crying with you
Why do we harm the only thing we want to be
I just gotta be
Me
I just gotta be
Me
Yeah
[GUITAR SOLO]
I didn't see you fallin'
I never heard you callin'
I've got my eyes wide open but never learned to see
I never ment to hurt you
Was right there crying with you
We only cage the very thing we want to free
I just wanna be
I just gotta be
I just gotta be me
I wanna be
Yeah
[Screams]
song performed by by Van Halen
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Fly Away
Verse 1
When you love someone so deeply
They become your life
Its easy to succumb to overwhelming fears inside
Blindly I imaged I could
Keep you under glass
Now I understand to hold you
I must open my hands
And watch you rise
Chorus 1
Spread your wings and prepare to fly
For you have become a butterfly
Fly abandonedly into the sun
If you should return to me
We truly were ment to be
So spread your wings and fly
Butterfly
Verse 2
I have learned that beauty
Has to flourish in the light
Wild horses run unbridled
Or their spirit dies
You have given me the courage
To be all that I can
And truly feel your heart will
Lead you back to me when youre
Ready to land
Chorus 2
Spread your wings and prepare to fly
For you have become a butterfly
Fly abandonedly into the sun
If you should return to me
We truly were ment to be
So spread your wings and fly
Butterfly
Bridge
I cant pretend these tears
Arent over flowing steadily
I cant prevent this hurt from
Almost overtaking me
But will stand and say goodbye
For youll never be mine
Until you know the way it feels to fly
Chorus 3
Spread your wings and prepare to fly
For you have become a butterfly
Fly abandonedly into the sun
If you should return to me
We truly were ment to be
So spread your wings and fly
Butterfly
Chorus 4
Spread your wings and prepare to fly
For you have become a butterfly
Fly abandonedly into the sun
If you should return to me
We truly were ment to be
So spread your wings and fly
Butterfly
So flutter through the sky
Butterfly
Spread your wings and fly
Butterfly
song performed by by Mariah Carey
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Fear of losing what i want the most
i'm lost and confuse,
my heart want you,
but it afraid of getting hurt,
and taking a chance,
i'm only with him,
becuz he knows my past,
he knows me,
or maybe not,
but i feel safe,
not happy,
safe that not much will be lost,
if i take this road,
than be with you,
you are amazing,
in every single way,
i feel safe with you,
i feel i can trust you,
i feel you get me,
in ways i've been looking for,
all of this time i'm running around blind,
you get the things,
i don't want to have to explain,
you kind of know by my moods,
how far you can push me,
and kind of when to stop,
why am i with the person i don't want to be?
am i searching for something else?
a mother in law,
that reminds me of mine?
so lost and confuse,
but yet knows what feels right,
yet why am i having to choose,
between that one special person,
that just feels right,
in so many ways,
than that one person,
i don't really feel nothing for?
poem by Mona Martinez
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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