Still believing lies

you told me i will never amount to nothing,
it's a lie i still believe,
i can't blame that i'm still a child,
even though at times i still feel like one,
everything that you did to me,
messed me up in more ways than i can say,
i know you didn't think twice,
about what you did to me,
you were only worried that you would get caught,
you knew it was wrong and you still did it,
now i'm left picking up the pieces,
and trying to fix my life the way i want it,
it's a struggle but i'm getting through it,
i'm still angery at what you did to me,
that would never go away,
like ppl say it will,
becuz i am reminded everytime i'm triggered,
it sad that a real man,
have to stand up and tell me,
that everything i'm going through,
was not my fault,
i continue to blame myself,
cuz it was what you told me,
i was sexy,
i make you feel a certain way,
i was a child,
how did i make you feel sexual towards me,
when i didn't even know what that was?
you made it my fault,
just so you won't feel bad,
about what you wanted to do,
i didn't deserve to be treated like a toy,
i didn't deserve to feel such fear,
for having and opinion,
that was different than yours,
but i did,
everything i felt,
i thought i deserved in some way,
the guilt, shame, and helplessness,
i carried it everyday,
and kinda didn't know why,
the more i open up,
the more i discover the person,
that i have been so afraid to get to know,
the more everything you said to me,
is starting to disappear.

poem by Mona MartinezReport problemRelated quotes
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Breathe

Two men
They started walking
Started talking bout better days
One says to the other
We do it all again
Seems I knew I would
And now I found it
Found I got it
I didn't want this
Somebody help me see
Now I feel it
Feel like I've been there
I didn't need this
Somebody help me breathe

Here we are again
Just face to facing
Each other another day
Who wins
Well who cares
It always ends up the same
Seems I knew I would

And now I found it
Found I got it
I didn't want this
Somebody help me see
And now I feel it
Feel that I've been there
I didn't need this
Would Somebody help me stand
And now I've told them
Already warned them
I didn't want this
Somebody help me breathe

If I was them
Then I wanna be
What I see
If I could drag my life in a moment
Wanna know do you want me to go
Gonna keep it all from ending
Never stop myself from pretending
That you always knew that I never could

All I ever really wanted was to be the same
Equal treatment never ever comes
and there they go again
All I ever really wanted was to be like you
So perfect
So worthless
If i could take it all back think again
I would

And now I found it
Found I got it
I didn't want this
Somebody help me see
Now I feel it
Feel that I've been there
I didn't need this
Somebody help me stand
And now I've told them
I didn't want this
I didn't need this
Would somebody help me breathe
Would somebody help me breathe
Would somebody help me?

song performed by by Nickelback from The StateReport problemRelated quotes
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All I Wanted Was to Make YOU Proud

This fire in my blood
This fire in my eyes

The fire that come shooting,
right out of my damned mouth.

This fire of the rage!
This fire of the pain.

This fire of the anger,
that is burning in my head

I feel all the hatred
I feel so damn used

Walked through streets so flooded,
to get a glimpse of you

I got nothing of you
I didn't even get a look

The closest i was to you,
was the radiation from my phone

I don't know what i was doing
I wasn't thinking straight

Just thought that you'd be happy
If i was really there

I thought that you'd be angered
And would say i didn't care

I risked my life!
I risked my health.

My family was in second place

You were first through my mind
You were my main concern

To make you happy was my wish..
It didn't come true

I feel crushed and devastated
I guess hard enough, i didn't try

It's my fault your ankles broken,
When the sirens sound, I start to cry

Did you want to see me?
Do you really care?

What if i'd been stolen?
What if i'd been raped?

Well, it would of been
all of my damned fault

I shouldn't take a risk
For things that don't matter

I took a risk for you
My life was on the line

I didn't even think it twice
About me, i didn't give a damn

All i wanted was to see you
I wanted to know you were alright

I wanted to make you happy
I wanted to make you proud

That you knew you had a girlfriend that was there,
no matter what

But apparently i wasn't there
I guess i wasn't at all

So maybe you want better
Someone that's truly there

No matter what...

I'm not good enough now
And maybe i deserved to be drenched.

Maybe i deserved to shed every tear that i shed
Maybe i deserved the cuts on my hands

Maybe i deserved it
Maybe I'm a waste

And at the end of it all,
who am I to blame? ..

No one but myself..

poem by Evelyn CastilloReport problemRelated quotes
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Alone

It's late again
It didn't seem to be a problem I couldn't see
You made that choice that made me want to set you free
I see you alone
How does it feel
You lost me again
Took the wrong road
Afraid to be seen
You didn't believe me
How could I prevent what was so meant to me
It's not my fault I knew this all would come to be
Why did you feel so bad to me
I see you alone
How does it feel
You lost me again
Took the wrong road
Afraid to be seen
You didn't believe me
How at all could you expect to sit and stay
After that night there is now way this would not break
I see you alone
How does it feel
You lost me again
Took the wrong road
Afraid to be seen
You didn't believe me

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I Use To Settle For You, Until I Realized I Deserve Better

i use to like you,
becuz i thought,
that i couldn't be liked,
now that i'm seeing who i am,
i'm realizing that i deserve better,
not to sound me but,
my needs wasn't being met,
but yet,
you wanted me there everytime,
that you seem to have a problem,
i gave you advice and supported you,
yet when i need advice,
all you can say is,
'it my fault' or 'ok'
there was really,
nothing that i got from it,
i got told i was beautiful,
and that you liked my clothes,
but it never felt like you ment it,
it always felt like it what you had to say,
i like the truth,
or for you to at least feel like you ment it,
not for it to feel presurre to say,
either this is all new,
or i'm just now seeing what i want,
and this here just not it,
i know i rushed it abit,
i was afraid that what i had found,
with somebody else is what i want,
it all something new,
this person i feel like me for me,
not becuz i can do things better,
but in a way,
it was the only way i knew how to be,
until i found a better way to be,
i don't have to give it all away,
just to be liked,
i can actually be me,
and take it slow,
who doesn't like being who they were ment to be?

poem by Mona MartinezReport problemRelated quotes
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I Realized Why I Hate Rejection

i hate being rejected,
i never understood until today,
it replays in my mind,
the day you told me,
that it was my fault,
it couldn't be the way it was,
when it was you and i,
i was a child,
you put the blame on me,
told me i opened my mouth,
and now things can never be the same,
i was a child,
everything you were doing to me,
just felt so wrong,
i enjoyed the attention,
looking back,
i don't think it was worth it,
there are memories i won't forget,
everything you did to me,
was set in stone,
it will never be undone or erased,
it will remain,
a memory i wish to distroy,
but i can't,
it's a memory and feeling,
that is hard to live with at times,
being told as a child,
that you wasn't good enough,
by a man who had no right,
and yet i'm the one hurting,
it don't feel fair,
you got what you enjoyed,
and i didn't even asked for it,
i was forced into doing it,
what i didn't want to do,
it no wonder i put myself,
in the same exact thing you put me in,
it feels right,
but at the same time,
i'm hallow and numb,
i don't feel nothing,
i'm not even sure if i want to feel something,
because feeling something means,
feeling the deep pain,
i let myself go years trying to forget,
it will all come flooding back,
all the pain is hard,
it don't seem to get easier.

poem by Mona MartinezReport problemRelated quotes
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Words are not just words

i'm confused and lost in my thoughts,
but what you said,
really had affected me,
i felt like a prize ppl want,
once they get it,
there will be nothing else,
that they would want,
never knew words can hurt so much,
words were how my abuser,
knew how to get me to stay,
all of the lies he told,
it was so easy to believe,
becuz they hurt,
they still haunt me,
i admit that i still compare ppl,
from time to time,
it what i need to work on,
i hate that when somebody do,
one wrong thing,
i hold them accountable,
but yet why do i feel so bad,
when ppl have the right to pick their actions,
why do i think i'm the one to blame,
i did nothing wrong,
i feel guilt and shame,
what i have always felt all my life,
i continue to let ppl off easy,
when they hurt me,
i suck it up,
and pretend it don't hurt,
but at times,
i would rather cut myself,
just so i won't have to feel the pain,
and wonder what i did wrong to deserve it,
there are times i know i deserve better,
but the pain from the past,
attract me to ppl who don't know what they have,
until it gone.

poem by Mona MartinezReport problemRelated quotes
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Didnt Know

Didn't know what you had
Until you lost it
Didn't know what you own
Until you got it
Didn't know of your sins
Until you fought it.
Didn't know what you needed
Until you sought it.

Didn't know your lies
Until someone spoke them
Didn't know of the truth
Until someone wrote them
Didn't remembered your dreams
Until someone awoke them
Didn't know they died
Until someone chocked them.

Didn't know you had guilt
Until you cried
Didn't know you felt sadness
Until you tried to hide
Didn't know you felt shame
Until you lied
Didn't know you believed in GOD
Until you asked him why.

Didn't know you felt sorrow
Until you shed a tear
Didn't know that you were scared
Until I saw your fear
Didn't know that you hated
Until you were near
Didn't know that you were unhappy
Until you looked in a mirror.

Didn't know who you truly were
Until your ways you sewed
Didn't know that you were evil
Until the truth was showed
Didn't know you did this before
Until I saw all of your woe
Didn't know who you really were
Though I wished then I did know.

Randy L. McClave

poem by Randy McClaveReport problemRelated quotes
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Lies My Abuser Told Me

my abuser said,
nobody would ever love me,
i believed him,
so i pushed ppl away,
he said i was to blame,
i believed it,
becuz i was just a kid,
he said i was his special little girl,
i felt like it at times,
but it was not worth the pain i feel now,
he said nobody will believe me,
he was right,
nobody did believe me at the time,
he said i was only good for one thing,
i believed him,
i was his special little girl,
he said i was pretty,
it was the reason he liked me alot,
and treated me differently,
he said and he told me,
all of these things plus more,
i was a child,
it was hard to figure out,
what was right and wrong,
when you consently being told,
do you trust me?
there should be no problem,
but these words still ring in my mind,
how can i trust somebody,
who leaves me in pain when we done?
how can i trust somebody,
who force a child to do something,
they clearly don't want to do?
how can you trust somebody,
who continue to put you down,
just so you feel like you doing something wrong,
how can you trust somebody,
who gives a child a beer just so she will loosen up?
when tears were falling down my face,
and i was begging you to stop,
did you even ease up just once?
no you didn't,
you forced my head down on you,
and told me to stop crying,
who does that?
you selfish prick,
i hope you rot in hell.

poem by Mona MartinezReport problemRelated quotes
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Depression destroyed my life

Depression destroyed my life.
It told me I was no good.
It told me I was all bad.
It told me I was not loved.
It told me I didn't deserve treatment.
It told me I deserved to die.

Depression destroyed my life.
I listened to what it was saying.
I told myself I was no good.
I told myself I wasn't loved because I was bad.
I didn't seek treatment to feel better.
I tried to kill myself for his entertainment.

Depression destroyed me.
I am left picking up the pieces.
He has left me alone.
He said it was to late for help now.
He left me scared and confused.
He is still here.
He wants to keep me.
And he will keep me.

Depression destroyed my life.
All I am asking is that it does not destroy yours.

poem by Anastasia MimiReport problemRelated quotes
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I keep coming back to you

i open up and talk about my past,
i tell you why i just can't do certain things,
why i will never be a normal girl,
you make it about you,
saying it's all your fault,
you feel like a jerk,
it had nothing to do with you,
it was a selfish jerk,
that had no right to touch me,
when i was a child,
a few days go by,

we start to talk again,
as if everything is back the way it was,
only it wasn't,
what i shared was so personal,
i hardly share it unless i feel i can trust you,
it only feels like now,
you will do anything to avoid me,
like it was my fault,
i felt like a reject,
like it was my fault in some way,
but i was a child,

what could i have done?
you say things that get me coming back,
in the back of my mind,
i know you only want me becuz you are lonely,
what kind of fool am i?
to keep coming back to something that will never work,
i never get my needs met,
and yet i pretend like i don't care,
when slowly it eating me up inside,
i can only be what you want me to be,
just like in my past,

no wonder this is working out great for you,
if i had my cake and eat it too,
i will be happy as well,
but since i can't,
not being with you is the best it gets,
you have been my friend all of these years,
and i must know more about you,
than you know about me,
at first i thought it was becuz i wasn't opened,
it was as if you didn't care,
unless i dealt and sovled your problems.

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(You Make Me Feel Like) A Natural Man

Looking out on the morning rain
I used to feel so uninspired
But when I knew I had to face another long, long day
girl I used to feel so tired
Before the day I met you
life had been so unkind
but you're the key to my peace of mind
'Cause you made me feel, you made me feel
you made me feel like a natural man
When my soul was in the lost and found
you came along to claim it
I didn't know, I didn't know just what was wrong with me
till your kiss helped me to name it
Now I'm no longer doubtful of what I'm living for
but if I make you happy I don't need to do more
'Cause you made me feel, you made me feel
you made me feel like a natural man
Oo baby, baby look what you have done to me
Can't you see that you made me feel so good inside
Don't you know that I just want to be
close to you, you made me feel so alive
'Cause you made me feel, you made me feel
you made me feel like a natural man
Baby I ain't doubtful of what I'm living for
but if I make you happy I don't need to do more
'Cause you made me feel, you made me feel
Well you made me feel like a natural man

song performed by by Rod StewartReport problemRelated quotes
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A Natural Man

(g. goffin / c. king / j. wexler)
Looking out on the morning rain
I used to feel so uninspired
But when i knew i had to face another long, long day
Girl i used to feel so tired
Before the day i met you
Life had been so unkind
But you're the key to my peace of mind
'cause you made me feel, you made me feel
You made me feel like a natural man
When my soul was in the lost and found
You came along to claim it
I didn't know, i didn't know just what was wrong with me
Till your kiss helped me to name it
Now i'm no longer doubtful of what i'm living for
But if i make you happy i don't need to do more
'cause you made me feel, you made me feel
You made me feel like a natural man
Oo baby, baby look what you have done to me
Can't you see that you made me feel so good inside
Don't you know that i just want to be
Close to you, you made me feel so alive
'cause you made me feel, you made me feel
You made me feel like a natural man
Baby i ain't doubtful of what i'm living for
But if i make you happy i don't need to do more
'cause you made me feel, you made me feel
Well you made me feel like a natural man

song performed by by Rod StewartReport problemRelated quotes
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Kickin It With Your Girlfriend

I've been kickin it with your girlfriend (oh)
What am i gonna do (oh)
Cuz God knows that i really didn't mean to hurt you (oh ooh)
I know its bogus, but i felt that you should know the truth (oh ooh)
I fell in love with her the moment we were introduced
And i just feel that its time for little secret to end
Baby im kickin it with your girlfriend
oh oh ooh oh oh oh oh ooh oh oh oh (2x)
Go on and slap me again cuz i can understand how you feel
When a man takes you for granted and he don't keep it real
I should have been more man and told you a long time ago
Instead of stuntin i should have broke it down and let you know
Girl my fault for that, don't know whats on my mind
And i blame myself for wasting your time
Believe i really tried to keep that girl away from me
But her body language kept on temptin and teasin me
And plus she knew what she was doin, and did it anyway
I knew what she was doin too and that made it ok
Truth is, is that we don't even regret it
Up out the closet i will be the first to say it
I've been kickin it with your girlfriend (oh)
What am i gonna do (oh)
Cuz God knows that i really didn't mean to hurt you (oh ooh)
I know its bogus, but i felt that you should know the truth (oh ooh)
I fell in love with her the moment we were introduced
And i just feel that its time for little secret to end
Baby im kickin it with your girlfriend
oh oh ooh oh oh oh oh ooh
Now I apologize for me and her and everything that went down
These are the reasons that some girls don't bring their friends around
I just didn't know how to tell you, that i was feeling her
And how we would get away sometimes with makin love
I never wanted to mislead you
At first i just wanted to please you
I know its hard for you to be able to trust again
Cuz i came between you and your best friend
I did not ask for this
It just happened out of no where every since the day we kissed
and the truth is, is that we don't even regret it
Up out the closet i will be the first to say it
I've been kickin it with your girlfriend (oh)
What am i gonna do (oh)
Cuz God knows that i really didn't mean to hurt you (oh ooh)
I know its bogus, but i felt that you should know the truth (oh ooh)
I fell in love with her the moment we were introduced
And i just feel that its time for little secret to end
Baby im kickin it with your girlfriend (oh)
I'm sorry again (i never meant to hurt you)
I'm sorry agian (but girl i love her)
I'm sorry again (i never meant to make you cry no)
Now im up out the closet
I've been kickin it with your girlfriend (oh)
What am i gonna do (oh)
Cuz God knows that i really didn't mean to hurt you (oh ooh)
I know its bogus, but i felt that you should know the truth (oh ooh)
I fell in love with her the moment we were introduced
And i just feel that its time for little secret to end
Baby im kickin it with your girlfriend (YEAH!)
2x

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Who would want me

i feel like i'm scaring you away,
i don't want to but,
i feel like i have so many unresovled issues,
that it is only a matter of time,
until you can't handle it,
and you turn away,
i'm afraid of that day,
you just had enough,
and just walk away,
i don't get,
guys that want a girl who feels,
like she is messed up,
and can't change it at times,
i hate being this girl,
who can't seem to get her life right,
i put ton of pressure on guys,
who i know don't deserve it,
but at the same time,
i want to know who can handle me,
who just not in it,
to get what they want,
and leave,
it something i don't want to happen,
but there have been times when,
i chose such jerks,
who didn't deserve me,
i was afraid to know,
that i can do better,
better than what they can ever give me,
got called a tease,
yeah it hurt very much,
felt like i wasn't good enough,
you made it clear everyday,
you enjoyed the power it gave you,
when you felt weak,
so many emotions,
it still brings me back to the question,
why do guys still want me?

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I Didn't Mean To Turn You

Let you take me out
I knew what you were all about
But when I did
I wasn't tryin' to lead you on

Now you bring me home
And tell me goodnight's
Not enough for you
I'm sorry baby
I didn't mean to turn you on

You read me wrong
I wasn't trying to lead you on
I want a friend
I didn't mean to turn you on

I didn't mean to turn you on

I know you
Expected a one night stand
When I refused
I knew you wouldn't understand

Boy I told you twice
I was only tryin' to be nice
Only tryin' to be nice
Oh
I didn't mean to turn you on
Oh I didn't mean to turn you on

Turn you on

Tell me why should I
Feel guilty cause I won't give
Guilty cause I won't give in
I didn't mean to turn you on

[repeat chorus]

You think that I'm a fool
Cause I wouldn't play by your rules

(I didn't mean to turn you on)

You don't stand a chance
All I want to do is dance with you

(I didn't mean to turn you on)

I told you twice
I was only tryin' to be nice

(I didn't mean to turn you on)

I loved you for a friend
But I guess this is the
End of our relationship
Cause I didn't mean to turn you on

I didn't mean to turn you on
Sorry.

[Repeat]

song performed by by Mariah Carey from GlitterReport problemRelated quotes
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Youth Of A Nation

Last day of the rest of my life I wish I would have known cause i'd have kissed my
momma goobye. I didn't tell her that I loved her or how much cared or thank my
pops for all the talks and all the wisdom he shared. Unaware I just did what I
always do. Everyday the same routine before I skate off to school but who knew
that
this day wasnt like the rest, instead of takin the test I took two to the chest.
Call me blind but I didn't see it comin and everybody was runnin but I couldn't
hear nothin, except gun blast, it happened so fast I didn't really know this kid
though I sat by him in class. Maybe this kid was reachin out for love or maybe
for a moment he forgot who he was or maybe this kid just wanted to be hugged,
whatever it was I know its because
CHORUS
We are We are the youth of the nation (repeat)x4
Little Suzzy she was only twelve she was given the world with every chance to
excel
Hang with the boys and hear the stories they tell she might act kinda proud
but no respect for herself
She finds love in all the wrong places the same situations but different faces.
Changed up her pace since her daddy left her too bad he never told her she
deserved much better.
Johnny boy always played the fool, he broke all the rules so you would think he
was cool.
He was never really one of the guys no matter how hard he tried, with the
thought of suicide
It's kinda hard when you ain't got no friends, he put his life to an end they
might remember him then.
You cross a line and there is no turnin back he told the world how he felt with
the sound of a gat.
CHORUS x4
Whos to blame for the life that tragedies claim no matter what you say it won't
take away the pain, that I feel inside I'm tired of all the lies don't nobody know
why it's the blind leadin the blind.
Guess that's the way that the story goes, will it ever make sense somebody's
gotta
know, there's gotta be more to life than this, there's got to be more to everything
I thought exists

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For A While

Saturday, slept through the morning
Just let the phone ring, now isn't that strange
I watched cartoons, poor ole' coyote
Someone had a worse day than me for a change
And it made me happy
It made me smile
For a while
You always said my friends are all crazy
Baby here lately it seems I fit in
We go out just like the old days
Try to find new ways to go there again
And it makes me happy
It makes me smile
For a while
Everythings just fine
A little ray of sunshine
I didn't feel the fault line running straight through my heart
I didn't think about you
I didn't come unglued
It's a temporary undo but it's a start
It's a start
Late at night I write my own movies
And I am the star, when I close my eyes
Except I look at Julia Roberts
And you're just the poor jerk that I walk on by
And it makes me happy
It makes me smile
For a while
Everythings just fine
A little ray of sunshine
I didn't feel the fault line running straight through my heart
I didn't think about you
I didn't come unglued
It's a temporary undo but it's a start
Little victories, I'll take 'em
Everythings just fine
A little ray of sunshine
I didn't feel the fault line running straight through my heart
I didn't think about you
I didn't come unglued
It's a temporary undo but it's a start
It's a start

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Didn't Mean To Turn You On

Let you take me out
I knew what you were all about
But when I did
I wasn't tryin' to lead you on

Now you bring me home
And tell me goodnight's
Not enough for you
I'm sorry baby
I didn't mean to turn you on

Chorus:
You read me wrong
I wasn't trying to lead you on
I want a friend
I didn't mean to turn you on
I didn't mean to turn you on

I know you
Expected a one night stand
When I refused
I knew you wouldn't understand

Boy I told you twice
I was only tryin' to be nice
Only tryin' to be nice
Oh
I didn't mean to turn you on
Oh I didn't mean to turn you on

Turn you on

Tell me why should I
Feel guilty cause I won't give
Guilty cause I won't give in
I didn't mean to turn you on

(repeat chorus)

You think that I'm a fool
Cause I wouldn't play by your rules

(I didn't mean to turn you on)

You don't stand a chance
All I want to do is dance with you

(I didn't mean to turn you on)
I told you twice
I was only tryin' to be nice

(I didn't mean to turn you on)

I loved you for a friend
But I guess this is the
End of our relationship
Cause I didn't mean to turn you on

I didn't mean to turn you on
Sorry.

Repeat

song performed by by Mariah CareyReport problemRelated quotes
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Time Of Our Life

Hey, I can see that smile on your face
Tonight, memories will never erase
And I feel like our time has come
Our hearts are beating wild as one
True love, I know is hard to find
But you tonight, You're mine
Didn't we have the time of our life tonight
Didn't we have the time of our life tonight
Hey, I hope you feel the same way I feel
Cause tonight the moon, the stars,
This moment is so real, To us we had everything
Our hearts have a song to sing
We now know that dreams come true
Cause now there's me and you
Didn't we have the time of our life tonight
Didn't we have the time of our life tonight
Didn't we have the time of our life tonight
Didn't we have the time of our life tonight
Didn't we dance the night away
What can I say to you, You make life a holiday
Let's go and play, Let's go and play
Didn't we have the time of our life tonight
Didn't we have the time of our life tonight
Didn't we have the time of our life tonight
Didn't we have the time of our life tonight
Come on and sing the song
Come on and sing along

song performed by by Lionel RichieReport problemRelated quotes
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Tell Me

Tell me I wasn't true
Tell me I didn't believe in you
Tell me a moment I didn't share
Tell me when I acted like I didn't care
Tell me a moment with me that was hard to bear
Tell me when I was fake
Tell me the time we spent wasn't great
Tell me I wasn't a good friend
Tell me I wouldn't have your back until the end
Tell me I treated you like a child
Tell me a time I couldn't make you smile
Tell me a time I didn't miss you
Tell me I never kissed you
Tell me a time I used you
Tell me a time I abused you
Tell me you're not all I have
Tell me when I didn't speak on your behalf
Tell me when I didn't have your back
What I'm seeing I feel like you're telling me all of that

poem by Daniel ChapmanReport problemRelated quotes
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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