A Letter To Gabriella
Should you find these words, and read them, one day-
Then, perhaps, any lingering doubts you may
Have had about my truth, will be erased!
If only you were privy to all the hopes emplaced,
All the wants of a Father, forlorn by his absence-
All the aspirations, rife, with the glory of your pleasance-
Then you would realize, any different thought
Would be tragic-as the truth, it would be, not!
I have come to accept that your mind may have been poisoned,
Though realize, as my Daughter, surely you questioned
All manner of assertions that may have been averse to me-
And reserved judgment, at least until we converse, to see
Where the truth really does lie;
As to why you have been deceived, or why
We have been forcibly estranged, for so long-
Suffice is to say, some know right, yet choose wrong-
And, unfortunately for us, one of them is charged with your guard!
I am sure you have gathered as much-it is not hard
To discern a person's essence, from how they treat
Their children-without so much as an attempt to be discreet,
You became a pawn, behind which a coward hid!
I shall never forget the damage done by what she did-
Nor could I-I have scars, mental and physical, both very real!
However, the most tragic part is that she was allowed to steal
Away the most precious gift I have ever been given-
And with it, all that for which I have so long, striven!
This cancer was emboldened and enabled
By a non-existent system, that had been fabled
As 'the great equalizer'-yet, sadly I have not seen this!
For, all who assume equality, surely have never been this
Mired iniquity as have I, and by extension, you-
The answer has been to fight fiercely-what else could I do?
Each day that passed without you was like another death-
Each battle I fought, I awaited with bated breath,
An outcome where your best intentions were advanced!
Alas, days became weeks, then months danced
Past, to become years-all the while, without you!
No one but I, has made it all about you!
My heart has bled for you, for many years-
My mind has oft-thought, and caused so many tears,
Not just for my loss, but your's as well-
The profound nature of which was nearly my death knell!
I will never stop fighting until the fighting is done-
Until I bear witness again, to your grace, it has not even begun!
-Maurice Harris,14 May 2011
poem by Maurice Harris
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A Letter To Abigail
So much time has surely come to pass,
Whereby I have been without thee-alas,
So too have thee, been without me-
Though I assure thee that I have loved thee devoutly,
But regrettably in absentia, as you have been secreted away;
I think of you always, ne'er have I neglected a day!
Sadly, I know not your visage, as evidence
Of same has too been kept from me, since
Last I saw your Angelic face-
Lo, these many days hence, I have glimpsed not a trace,
But in fanciful aspiration, of the beauty you have become;
Days became weeks, weeks became months, more cumbersome
With each that passes, as though my heart fails me!
I shan't be whole again until your grace itself, avails me-
Until such time as I may fondly gaze into thine eyes
And share with you all the hopes and wants for our reprise!
Now, all we share is a last name, nothing more,
You have been hidden from me, by someone I am loathing more
Each and every day, and she calls herself your guardian! ?
She guards naught, but this maternal deception:
To the world she pretends as though she cares
More for you than she does for herself, yet dares
To continue to keep us apart, a forced estrangement-
Which, for her, I am sure is a convenient arrangement!
My love for you does not cease in my absence,
Nor do I grow less wanton for the grace of thine pleasance-
Circumstance has conspired surely against us,
But I shan't relent until I gather our justice!
That I must rely upon aspiration alone, pains me-
You deserve more than this-any gains we
Made when you were young, are effectively lost-
That we are now, in essence, strangers, the tragic cost!
It gives me little consolation that the truth will one day become known-
My heart is broken now and I wish to know you, when grown,
Not re-acquaint with you, as though for the first time!
I wish the wait to be over, as I am certainly prime
For our consort to again be, as was before-
Before you were aware of same, on birth's door!
I hope that this letter dissuades your doubts, and allays your fears,
As my thoughts have been of you, and for you, my tears!
Until we again meet my beloved, stay beautiful, stay true-
Remember always, that I have always loved you!
-Maurice Harris,15 May 2011
poem by Maurice Harris
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The Only Gift
Say not a word, if it be not truth, in whole;
Have not a thought, should you you not this, extol:
That, above all, truth be of paramount importance,
And should never be subjugated to any indulgence
Of selfish endeavor, for even a time, brief-
As same shall surely cause another, grief;
Deceit begets more of same, as a spiral
And causes pain as any form of viral
Cancer may-and it is as real as they may be-
Though, the effects perhaps, only the afflicted may see!
Justice means truth, so deceit is akin to iniquity;
Truth is His Way, and fallacy is not-this simplicity
Is the only rule by which any need, live
A righteous life-the only gift He expects you to give!
-Maurice Harris,11 march 2012
poem by Maurice Harris
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The Only Justice I Really Seek
'Who am I? ' I will only know, when I am allowed to see
The future that God has graciously avowed to me,
After both injustice and death, as well as before.
Life has new meaning now, as does what I am fighting for:
The only two resplendent sureties in seas of deceit-
This is what is needed to make my life complete!
My life yearns for them, as the 'purpose' He intended-
Until this wrong is righted, until this tear is mended,
My heart, and indeed my mind, and shattered soul,
Will never understand the contentment of simply being whole!
My ears hear them cry out to me, though they are not near;
My eyes long for sight of them, because they are not here;
My heart aches, in the face of their tragic absence,
While my mind may only imagine their true magnificence!
Their consortium is the only justice I really seek;
They are the only strength I need, where I am truly weak;
May my thousands of pleaded prayers, finally find answer,
To rid my world of this anguish, this fully-metastasized cancer!
Much in mind, and in many ways, moribund-since that day;
Yet, I must brave what comes, no matter what may-
Because, as I need them, they need me even more;
We three patiently await the Natural Order, to restore-
Whereby the rights of these two precious jewels
Are no longer absconded by minions and fools!
This once-broken Father's heart now seeks repair,
Through the riddance of the estrangement, and the despair
Into which it has been drawn me, since that horrific day-
When this shall come to pass though, no one may say;
It is in the Hands of my Heavenly Father to decide;
All I may do is humbly pray for redress, and faithfully bide!
-Maurice Harris,24 September 2011
poem by Maurice Harris
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Dreams' Allusion To A Reality Yet To Be
Yet another holiday has been robbed from us
By iniquity masked very crudely, as justice;
My aspiration will meet with a fanciful fruition,
When I no longer need paternal intuition
To paint the picture that is you, in all your glory-
When I no longer need a pen, to tell a story
Of my grievous pain, in the face of your absence,
But rather, am allowed to revel in the grace of your pleasance;
We must bide still my beloved Daughter, until it is that time-
Until our Gracious Father decides that we are prime,
For the consort long, long ago waylaid;
We have done our part, with a faith that never strayed
And need only for the wait to be concluded-
So our reality becomes that, to which our dreams have only alluded!
-Maurice Harris,24 April 2011
poem by Maurice Harris
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The Little Girl With My Last Name
Who cries for the little girl who knows not, from whence she came?
Who shares with the little girl, the story behind her last name?
Years have passed; many moons have surely shone;
All the while, she has shared a legacy that she has never known!
Many a tear has been surreptitiously shed;
Many a protestation made, many a prayer said-
With the hope that this anguish might meet its cease,
Whereby, at long last, a battered soul may find peace!
Who grieves for the little girl, who knows not the depths of her own heartache?
What may be the balm for this tragic heartbreak?
The answer obviates-I am the only one who shares her pain-
She needs me, as cause to restore that smile again!
'I was your very genesis, and you helped me become the man I became-
You are the tragic loss I mourn; the little girl with my last name! '
-Maurice Harris
poem by Maurice Harris
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This Purgatory
Perhaps you have buried truth, for the better good-
I cannot do that any longer, nor would I, if I could.
I am in love with you and wish the world to know-
And would bear any sacrifice needed, to show
You, or anyone else who needed to be convinced.
Should one be not swayed, it is surely evidenced
In the way I gaze adoringly into your eyes,
And become lost in amorous thought, until I realize
That I cannot truly love, if love is not returned.
Though I suppose this purgatory has been well-earned,
After all, you offered me all this love before, but I was not prime,
And was too afeared to realize 'love' does not have a wrong time!
I cannot undo the mistakes of my past,
All I can do is offer you this love, sure to last!
-Maurice Harris,18 August 2011
poem by Maurice Harris
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A Daughter's Prayer
'Dear Lord, though my Mommy does not speak of such,
The man who lives with me is not my Daddy;
He has been with me for about three years, I know this much.
But, I deserve to know my Father-and this is not caddy!
Please allow that he may again be able to see
Both the Daughter I have become, and shall always be.
I feel more forlorn each day, with the void of his absence-
I want very much to be privy again to his pleasance! '
It remains to be seen how the Lord shall answer
What is surely the heart-felt cry of a lonely child;
How might the Lord render reply to such a cancer! ?
How may He bring back one who has so defiled
His Very Name, as any who sees to continue such separation-
That would seek to further such a grievous devastation! ? !
The Lord must reckon with one of a wicked kind:
He must now and evermore cause remind,
The most important concern is the author of the 'letter'-
Until she no longer feels this void, naught shall ever be better!
As has always been the Lord's Modus Operandi-
In His own Way and Time, shall come reply;
Meanwhile, until an answer comes, as satisfaction,
The little lady shall repeat this prayer, with faithful repititon!
-Maurice Harris,17 August 2010
poem by Maurice Harris
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True Strength
I remember as a little boy, the enraptured awe
I felt when I thought of my Father, and how strong he was;
Sadly, my eyes were not trained, so that's all I saw
And thus, believed him a heroic figure, because
Of same-yet, I was so sadly mistaken!
My Father was not a hero, nor was he truly strong-
He was a coward, and I am sorry he has taken
So much, from so many-and that he did it for so long!
Now, as a man, I know the essence of true strength-
It is the ability to remain resolute in your conviction,
No matter the consequences imposed, no matter the length
Of suffering endured-this is real life, not fiction,
Or make believe-here, pain is very real;
True strength is the endurance, to endure that which you feel,
Inside, at the thought of all the pain endured-
The ability to realize that, his untimely death cured
The weakness he tried to hide frrom the rest of us,
He took so much through cowardice, but not the best of us-
We have nothing, about which to be ashamed,
The monster I called my Father, is the only one to be blamed!
-Maurice Harris,28 August 2011
poem by Maurice Harris
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All The Demons And Ghosts
You have stolen my 'todays', yet you shan't steal my tomorrow-
Thought upon your deceitful ruse surely hastens sorrow!
Nary shall there be, for you, a proper penance,
Somehow though, you must come to truth's acceptance!
The only way to take leave of your deceit-
Is to allow for my truth to defeat,
All the Demons and Ghosts
Responsible for your shame, the most!
For if but only, our children's posterity
You owe, at the least, your honesty!
Without such, your downfall you have surely brought,
As is, to tell the truth, is what you ought!
They say: 'the truth shall set you free'-at least you, it shall keep-
Otherwise choice made, causes my heart's weep!
3 August 2008
poem by Maurice Harris
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Until The Day Is Done
Any days rife with anger are long-since gone;
Remaining behind is hurt and confusion, long-lingering, since its dawn!
Love, alone, should've been enough for reasoned thought to follow,
Believe, I do, the mantra: 'always tell the truth...', your words are hollow!
Long gone too, any want for vengeance:
God shall allow for you to serve your penance!
Your futile attempt to prove me guilty, proved you to be such,
Though perhaps deserving of punishment, penal-may be too much!
Self-guilt, served with a helping of inner-shame shall, I believe, suffice,
Though, a taste of your bitter medicine, I think, at times, to be nice!
You have implied in the past that, perhaps I love thee not sufficiently-
It appears though, that you were the one loving deficiently!
If anyone need prove anything, to anyone,
It is you, to me and all others! I await thee dear, until the day is done!
Maurice Harris,17 January 2008
poem by Maurice Harris
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God's Greatest Gift
God's greatest gift-that of being a Father,
Rivaled only by compeer of a Mother;
Each aid formation of precious individuality,
Causal most to evolution in a child's personality-
Created in thine own image, guided by counsel,
Aegis directed lovingly is surely found well!
All careful parental thought made does attest
To your want and need for each, all the best!
Gather from it's import, the duty it imparts,
Guard must be offered it, in your hearts!
Not are each possessory, rather compeers,
Blessed witness to their wonder, through the years!
Treasure and duteously take possession of this,
Lest, if not, surely you would be remiss!
Maurice Harris,26 October 2009
poem by Maurice Harris
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A Purposeful Lesson, From A Painful Past
I lament the fact that I do not miss my dearly-departed Dad,
Nor may I see as real, the relationship that we once had:
My Father was not the man he purported to be;
It is only now, long after his demise, that I am able to see
The man I thought I knew, for who he truly was.
What is past is prologue, yet not for me, because
Though many years have past, I still wonder what was real.
My heart aches for what this association was allowed to steal,
Both from me and those I hold in the highest esteem.
Oh, how I wish that it were only a bad dream,
But I am not so fortuitous as to see its end-
My present is not one my past could portend.
I am not my Father's keeper, nor am I to blame
For anything that he once did-so, why then the shame! ?
He was but a fiend with which I share a last name,
Yet, it is not my purpose, nor surely my aim,
To cast aspersions at the man from whence I came,
Merely to markedly point out that we are not one and the same.
I can no more help my connection to him as I can my logical mind,
Yet this diaspora spreads and I may never leave it behind!
I have ardently prayed for refuge from this horrible curse,
Yet my prayers have gone unanswered, and the guilt, gotten worse!
I only wish to awaken to a world where ignorance is no longer-
A world where time heals all, and I am allowed to become stronger
For all that I have had to endure, for all I have overcome,
Yet my mind will not allow riddance to be paid to these cumbersome
Burdens I feel deep in my soul because of who my Father was.
I should not be made to suffer for what my Father does,
Just as no man should be held to account for acts of another,
I should not be made to recompense for those of a Father
I never really knew-whose shameful ruse was hidden from me.
This exorcision is needed, to ensure this curse is ridden, from me
And all those that I hold dear, for they have suffered too!
The world must see not only what I have suffered through,
But that my suffering was not in vain-it was surely not His intention
To inflict such pain without purpose; His Intervention
Is rife with lessons for all the world to see.
Lessons in the way He intends for the world to be:
Where His children demonstrate love, understanding, and compassion
For each other-without bias and prejudice-and without ration!
This must be the lesson that He wished to be taught to me
And the way He believes the world ought to be-
Otherwise my penance was all in vain,
And the world truly is insane!
-Maurice Harris,19 June 2012
poem by Maurice Harris
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Her Ardor
I believe in, yet know not how to accept, her ardor-
This is my mind's and heart's conflicted barter;
My mind says: 'surely, truth hath been spoken-
Her soul, lain bare to me, ne'er merely token! '
My heart says: 'surely, this may not be real-
Yet, she relays what her heart doth truly feel! ? '
Not once in my life have I been so tender-
Until God shone upon me again, her splendor!
At times, I am in awe, others, in disbelief-
Either way, my heart purloined-she, its thief!
Each solitary nox, as I lie down, to sleep,
I thank God: 'Heavenly Father, allow me to keep
This love she offers me-e'er allow that it be earned-
Assured Thee must be, it will be likewise returned! '
Maurice Harris,5 May 2010
poem by Maurice Harris
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Truth Leads My Actions
Do you believe still, what your mind caused you to think?
In your heart, you know your cause lacks veracity-
Alas, like a desperate, dying animal-you fight with tenacity!
Your paranoia causes your world to change, before you may blink!
Ever did you think, you may not be right?
Removed have you, their Father, their friend-
For them, I shall wage on, until the bitter end!
Know do I my ultimate victory, as righteous is my fight!
Nothing good has come, from that day on,
This due His rejection of your sinister way-
You had but one choice, from that day!
Accept this and the truth-allow again, love's spawn!
Deserve not, do you, my tolerance and understanding-
Truth leads my actions, my cause quite commanding!
Maurice Harris,18 June 2008
poem by Maurice Harris
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The Recital Of My Heart's Glory
I am bereft of sentiment worthy of mine own wondrous emotion
As my verity, at long last, hath given cause for soul's devotion;
As though predestined, reality meets with my heart's fanciful intuition,
My oft-imagined, life-long somniation hath come to wonderful fruition!
Once, as a child I did glimpse same, yet 'twas fleeting, and I, not prime;
Now, as a man, I bear witness to this grace again-this beauty, sublime!
For every man or monad thought inviolable, there exists impuissance-
Mine hath the form of a dichotomy, as she exudes with pleasance!
Nary doth a moment fleet whence thought is not consumed with such-
Periodically, I must cause remind, lest I should think it all, too much!
All this, yet still, an adjoining hath not been, for years, score-
To muse, whensoever same comes again-all, and evermore!
Hath there ever been such an eminent, empyrean, story?
Lo, there hath been-and it is surely the recital of my heart's glory!
Maurice Harris,1 December 2009
poem by Maurice Harris
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The Only Father I Have Really Ever Known
You never stood up and told the truth, you never even tried-
You simply took so much from those around you, and simply died-
Without contrition or even shame for all that you had done to so many-
Instead, I was left to carry guilt for a Father that did not have any.
The simple fact that you helped to procreate me, seemed to suffice,
As reason for the deceit and bias of many, the iniquitous price
That I was asked to pay, simply for who my Father was,
When I am no more responsible, for what my Father does,
Than those that you victimized before your untimely demise.
This is a most prescient fact that some do not stop to realize:
I was just a little boy then, yet became privy to your maleficence
As a man of 36, when my love for you became abhorrence;
When the man I knew as my Father died once again,
Where the sorrow for a Father lost, became the bain
Of my very existence-the thought that I mourned you
And the loss that I felt, when I was never warned, you
Were a monster-a fact that I should have known-
Instead, I held on to your memory, where I could have grown-
To distance myself from who I believed you to be,
To grow as a man, for all the world to see,
Unbiased by my connection to you, a man I never knew.
Instead, deceitful asservations, of things I could never do,
Continue to haunt me, as a spectre of unspeakable torment;
Where, my erstwhile inherent rights, I now sadly, silently lament.
It is not from you though, that I seek relief
From the horrors of my heart's abominable grief.
I look to my only real Father, in Heaven above,
Who only shows me compassion, truth, and love-
Not all that which you espoused, and have done.
You stole so much from us, but I will have won
When I can finally say I do not loathe you any longer,
Only what you have done-then I will be so much stronger
Than I am now, and then perhaps, ready to finally go home
To Heaven, and to the only Father I have really ever known.
-Maurice Harris,21 October 2012
poem by Maurice Harris
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Listen To Your Heart (An Ode To Courage)
But one simple, yet obvious fact remains, as has for nearly three years:
Love and hate have been engaged in a battle-love versus fears;
I am the truth of your heart, and your deceit is the manifestation
Of much, yet undue trepidation, as it relates to your future celebration
Of love in its myriad forms-now, the battle is between your heart and mind;
Your heart contains love as verity, yet your mind contains fears you need to leave behind;
Your mind contains a misplaced animus toward the love that causes your fright-
The courage I wish to impart to thee, is the strength to fight back, with all your might,
Any thought that this fear is permanent or rational-love's truth shall cause it to fastly fleet!
I, and others, may aid you along the way-yet, the battle's outcome must, before we truly meet,
Be a foregone conclusion-as circumstances seem to now indicate:
Time is needed to re-establish reality, from the delusion your fears helped to create;
In many ways, and by many personages, the power of truth has been extolled-
Now beloved, this very power is what your heart does resolutely hold-
To free you at last from the burden of your fears, to finally embrace
The love that has awaited you for your entire life, and which you may not efface,
By any means-either through an ignorance of your heart's exaltation,
Or by living the fallacy you have in the past-a dichotomous experimentation;
I have not been fooled by this charade, as I contain the truth of your heart's verity-
And the most salient advice I could e'er bestow, to impart the most prescient clarity,
Is to look to what your heart has told through all these many years:
Embrace the love that's in your heart-use this to banish all your fears!
poem by Maurice Harris
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I Love You, Yet Not
What will need be, in for your mind
To leave all you allege, finally behind?
You know better than to paint a picture, so fantastic-
Alas, you know deceit supplanting truth is tragic!
Why then, where truth is needed the most
Would you subvert the actual, in chase of a ghost?
Where be the lady to whom my heart doth belong-
What thee allowed, not what's meant by head-strong!
I love you, yet not do I want mine hand be forced-
My demands are stern, not as others, coerced!
Maurice Harris,18 June 2008
poem by Maurice Harris
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To Me, A Mystery
In some ways you choose to remain, to me, a mystery-
Wonder do I at thought of such: 'why...what for? '
Alas, the more I know about you-I love you more!
Know do I too, not is it I you fear, but your pain's 'history'!
You must know this though my bonnie lass:
Nary can cause repeat of hurt for you, being my cause-
Thought surely of my requited love enough to give pause!
In return, I offer you stewardship of my heart, made of glass!
Replete am I, heart and soul, with you in my embrace-
Harm shall ne'er come to you as long as I am alive,
To be the Prince worthy of my Princess, is what for I shall strive:
Wanton of naught in return, but witness to your grace!
The fates surely have been kind to me in their erudition:
To recompense their faith in us, I shall make my life's mission!
Maurice Harris,16 November 2008
poem by Maurice Harris
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Her Secret!
Long too forgotten, or so too should have been;
Not so though-mistrust abounded, now I am imprisoned!
Ne'er a thought, entered, nor an action, taken
Supportive of your fear, though still, me, you have forsaken!
Love never passes, for this is our test of time;
Sorrow and consequence are not just mine!
Stories were told, yet truth did emerge-
Banish did we, this horrific scourge!
Cursed by my Father,
Punishment for me, from many, other!
Needed we did each other, more then, than ever,
A love made immemorial; healing, not severed!
Wherever we are taken, from this place to another,
Always and ever am I her Father, and you, her Mother!
Reacted you did, to what you felt, wrong as it may be-
Truth emerged and set us apart, learned surely did we!
Hopeful I am in Justice, to put the past to rest;
At times, there are moments, we shall never forget, lest!
Learned are we now, of all consideration-
Wanton are we now for glimpses of our former infatuation!
Lonesome heart, wanton of vengeance or truth's gleam?
Please understand, my love, not always are things as they may seem!
Dying inside never needing not more
Than your hand in mutual understanding
Ever is this, ever is my heart, more demanding;
Ever encompassing, my heart, with those I do adore!
Maurice Harris,30 November 2007
poem by Maurice Harris
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