All you have to do is to look like crap on film and everyone thinks you're a brilliant actress. Actually, all you've done is look like crap.
quote by Helen Mirren
Submitted by Veronica Serbanoiu
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Related quotes
Piece Of Crap (Eddie Vedder & Ministry) (White Label Demo)
Neil Young) (various dates)
Tried to save the trees, bought a plastic bag
The bottom fell out, it was a piece 'a crap...piece of crap...
Wanted an LP, only had CD's
Digitally clean, it was a piece of crap...piece of crap...
Bought myself a can, thought it'd take me far
The dealer was a liar, he was a piece of crap...piece of crap...
Got it from my friend, on him you can depend
I found out in the end, it was a piece of crap...piece of crap...
I'm trying to save the trees, I saw it on TV
They cut the forest down to build a piece of crap...piece of crap...
Picked up a magazine to read about the scene
It didn't tell me beans, it was a piece of crap...piece of crap...
I went back to the store, they gave me four more
The guy told me at the door it was a piece of crap...
It was a piece of crap
song performed by by Pearl Jam
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Piece Of Crap
Tried to save the trees
Bought a plastic bag
The bottom fell out
It was a piece of crap
Saw it on the tube
Bought it on the phone
Now youre home alone
Its a piece of crap
I tried to plug in it
I tried to turn it on
When I got it home
It was a piece of crap
Got it from a friend
On him you can depend
I found out in the end
It was a piece of crap
Im trying to save the trees
I saw it on tv
They cut the forest down
To build a piece of crap
I went back to the store
They gave me four more
The guy told me at the door
Its a piece of crap
song performed by by Neil Young
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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And if you're a golfer and you watch a golf film and Matt Damon swing, and it's not great, then you're not going to believe in the golf story, you're not going to believe in the rest of the film. That's the whole movie, so if that swing looks like crap, the movie's crap.
quote by Shia LaBeouf
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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The English Teacher
I bumped into my grandson's English teacher yesterday
at the football, and in between shouting like teenagers
I moaned about the state of A's Eng. Lit. not to mention Eng. Lang. -
you know, you've heard it all before... in my day.....never regretted....
he agreed, but said go easy on the lad he's only thirteen
they all want to be fifteen and grown up at that age,
they can't be seen by their peer-group to be 'for' anything too much
so they ridicule everything, it's either pretentious crap if it's modern
or stupid ancient crap if it's more than a generation ago...
they even call Shakespeare a sad loser until
someone says he wrote the screenplay for that film
though they're fascinated by the idea that Marlowe
was a spy as well as a crap writer not that they've read him anyway
but you know what he said
put them up on stage in the annual Shakespeare and make them
speak his lines, and they'll never forget it,
they'll not say anything about it to me except in private but
they'll remember it to their dying day it's things like that
he said that keep me in this bloody job.
poem by Michael Shepherd
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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English Teacher
bumped into my grandson's English teacher yesterday
at the football, and in between shouting like teenagers
I moaned about the state of A's Eng. Lit. not to mention Eng. Lang. -
you know, you've heard it all before... in my day.....never regretted....
he agreed, but said go easy on the lad he's only thirteen
they all want to be fifteen and grown up at that age,
they can't be seen by their peer-group to be 'for' anything too much
so they ridicule everything, it's either pretentious crap if it's modern
or stupid ancient crap if it's more than a generation ago...
they even call Shakespeare a sad loser until
someone says he wrote the screenplay for that film
though they're fascinated by the idea that Marlowe
was a spy as well as a crap writer not that they've read him anyway
but you know what he said
put them up on stage in the annual Shakespeare and make them
speak his lines, and they'll never forget it,
they'll not say anything about it to me except in private but
they'll remember it to their dying day it's things like that
he said that keep me in this bloody job.
(revisited)
poem by Michael Shepherd
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Dead Cats, Dead Rats
Dead cats, dead rats
Cant see what they were at, all right
Dead cat in a top hat, wow
Sucking on the young mans blood
Wishing he could come, yeah
Sucking on the soldiers brain
Wishing it would be the same
Dead cat, dead rat
Cant you see what they were at?
Fat cat in a top hat
Thinks hes an aristocrat
Thinks he can kill and slaughter
Thinks he can shoot my daughter
Yeah right! oh yeah!
Oh right! yeeah!
Dead cats, dead rats
Think theyre an aristocrat
Crap, now thats crap!
song performed by by Doors
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Any professional knows that the flute and the piano is a boring combination. All you've got to arrive at is a kind of typical gestural crap, right? You might agree, though you wouldn't call it gestural crap.
quote by Morton Feldman
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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I did not deal well with the politicians. I tend to tell people that when they are full of crap, that they are full of crap.
quote by Robert Crandall
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Her Laundry List
Curtains were made
to conceal ugly people's nudity
Matchsticks were made to
scratch the inside of your ears
(doctors warn against this practice)
Fishing poles were made
to poison a man's ambition
Carpeting was made to cover dirt floors
Television was made to sell crap
Newspapers were written to wrap the crap in
Welfare was made to keep people dependent on crap
And finally
I was made to be yours
Socks worn more than three days were meant to be thrown away
and so therefore you weren't made to be mine
Logic....who said anything about Logic?
poem by Ted Sheridan
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Because of You
Because of you
I’m angry all the freakin’ time
Because of you
I’m always wary
Because of you
I lost my virtue
Because of you
I am broken
Chorus
Now we’re here
And no way
Will I give in to you
Now we’re here
My only weapon
Is sarcasm
Now we’re here
And I don’t want
What you started with me that day
Now we’re here
And I think
Who gives a crap anyway
End chorus
To you
I’m exposed
To you
I’m a quick target
But you will see
I’m not that easy
There’s more complications
That come with this confident girl
Now we’re here
And no way
Will I give in to you
Now we’re here
My only weapon
Is sarcasm
Now we’re here
And I don’t want
What you started with me that day
Now we’re here
And I think
Who gives a crap anyway
And I stand by and think
What’s the deal here
I never bothered you then
I don’t bother you now
And you started it
And all your friends laugh
Like no one’s watching
And I realize they aren’t
And I don’t want to tell
It’ll urge you on
But I can’t take this anymore
Now we’re here
And no way
Will I give in to you
Now we’re here
My only weapon
Is sarcasm
Now we’re here
And I don’t want
What you started with me that day
Now we’re here
And I think
Who gives a crap anyway
Don't worry, be crappy. Revolutionary means you ship and then test... Lots of things made the first Mac in 1984 a piece of crap - but it was a revolutionary piece of crap.
quote by Guy Kawasaki
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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I met someone the other night who's 28 years old, and he hasn't worked a day since he left college because he's pursuing a dream he'll never, ever realize: He thinks he's a great singer. Actually, he's crap.
quote by Simon Cowell
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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While You Skate
You can't break my heart and run,
Believing that will stimulate...
Since you've done it to invigorate,
While you skate.
Oh no!
No no.
No. No. No. No. No. No. Oh nooo!
You can't do what's been done before,
To pat and scratch like a puppy begging for more.
Ooo oh no.
No no.
No. No. No. No. No. No. Oh nooo!
Hold up on that locomotive.
With motives to bowl me all over...
Or roll in granola.
I'm much wiser...
Older.
Bolder.
And I don't cry on no one's shoulder!
Or weep for treats in tantrums to annoy.
Oh no.
No no.
No. No. No. No. No. No. Oh nooo!
Back up off that BS stuff.
I've had enough of all that crap you've laid!
I'm not a cuckoo.
Or your loose screw.
Ooooh back up off that BS stuff.
I've had enough of all that crap you've laid!
I'm not a cuckoo.
Or your loose screw.
You can't break my heart and run,
Believing that will stimulate...
Since you've done it to invigorate,
While you skate.
You can't do what's been done before,
To pat and scratch like a puppy begging for more.
Oh no.
No no.
No. No. No. No. No. No. Oh nooo!
Back up off that BS stuff.
I've had enough of all that crap you've laid!
I've said...
Back up off that BS stuff.
I've had enough of all that crap you've laid!
You can't break my heart and run,
Believing that will stimulate...
Since you've done it to invigorate,
While you skate.
No. No. No. No. No. No...
No!
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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The Way Things Are
I wouldnt know what to do with another chance
If you gave it to me
I couldnt take the embrace of a real romance
Itd race right through me
Im much better off the way things are
Much much better off, better by far, by far
I wouldnt know what to say to a gentle voice
Itd roll right past me
And if you chalk it up youll see I dont really have a choice
So dont even ask me
Im much better off, the way things are
Much much better off, better by far
So keep on calling me names, keep on, keep on
And Ill keep kicking the crap till its gone
If you keep on killing, you could get me to settle
And as soon as I settle, I bet Ill be
Able to move on
How can I fight, when were on the same side
How can I fight beside you
So keep on calling me names, keep on, keep on
And Ill keep kicking the crap till its gone
If you keep on killing, you could get me to settle
And as soon as I settle, I bet Ill be
Able to move on
So keep on calling me names, keep on, keep on
And Ill keep kicking the crap till its gone
If you keep on killing, you could get me to settle
And as soon as I settle, I bet Ill be
Able to move on
song performed by by Fiona Apple
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Efforts Of The Underdog
The only game I am here to play,
Is...
'How To Stop That Crap That's Maxed'
The only reason why I desire to compete,
Is...
'The Good Guys Seem To Be The Ones Defeated'
And I...
Support the efforts of the underdog.
Everyone seems to wish,
To kick those down and out.
Everyone seems to desire,
To be everywhere...
To champion despair.
The only game I am here to play,
Is...
'How To Stop That Crap That's Maxed'
The only reason why I desire to compete,
Is...
'The Good Guys Seem To Be The Ones Defeated'
And I...
Support the efforts of the underdog.
'Here...
Get up.
You take the ball.
Hopefully I can block you.
If I get knocked down...
You jump over me,
Finding a space...
To speed your run.
Until you have found,
Solid ground.'
The only game I am here to play,
Is...
'How To Stop That Crap That's Maxed'
The only reason why I desire to compete,
Is...
'The Good Guys Seem To Be The Ones Defeated'
And I...
Support the efforts of the underdog.
I've been there too many times myself.
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Rough And Ready
Mud grips wide tib
Cigar stickin' outta my face
Earn hard racin' sticker
On the wind banged up finder
4 by 4 straight pipe roar
Primer and rust all over the door
Scard up doubles magbel fuppers
White t-shirt aint afraid to work
Got a what are you lookin' at pretty boy smirk
..::Chorus::..
Cold beer, hot wings
Wranglers, school ring
Get just what you see
Gun rack, ball cap
Don't take no crap
Aint a pretty boy, toy
Well i'll rock you steady
Rough and ready
Work boots, one blue suit
Size too small
Won't wear it at all
Unless somebody's kids get hitched
It dont fit and makes me itch
Up with the sun, off in the run
Makin' money money cause we wanna have fun
5 o'clock whistle off like a mistle
Got a hot date, girl named Kate
Thinks i'm cool cause I shoot straight
Aint one thing about her fake
Shes long and tall and she goes great with
..::Chorus::..
Cold beer, hot wings
Wranglers, school ring
Get just what you see
Gun rack, ball cap
Don't take no crap
Aint a pretty boy, toy
Well i'll rock you steady
Rough and ready
Rough and ready baby
Well you are who you are
And thats allright with me
But I am who I am
And thats all I can be
I like
..::Chorus::..
Cold beer, hot wings
Wranglers, school ring
Get just what you see
Gun rack, ball cap
Don't take no crap
Aint a pretty boy, toy
Well i'll rock you steady
Rough and ready
Rough and ready
Rough and ready baby
song performed by by Trace Adkins
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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superciliousness in Norway
Superciliousness in Norway.
“They crap in our forest, ” an angry man yelled,
Roma people had pitched tents near the forest
where people of this tolerant nation go skiing
in winters. They came here to find work but
was meet with scorn and mistrust, they came
in hope of getting a part of our largesse; the rich
do not know this word. When people who used
to be poor suddenly see they are better off than
other countries, the first reaction is pride and
an unbecoming arrogance, like it was their
cleverness that brought oil up from the bottom
of the sea… Now instead of being humble having
had such luck they become reactionaries giving
advice to less fortunate countries.
“They crap in our forest”, nourishing an imbecilic
nation that due to undeserved richness has lost
contact with reality and human kindheartedness.
poem by Oskar Hansen
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Any Opportunity I Can Get
Which view,
In your opinion...
Has more of an advantage,
From a horse drawn cart?
The one riding as a passenger,
While sitting in the front?
Or the one from the back,
With nothing but the rear of the horse to see?
'That's difficult to answer.
I have grown very attached to gardening.
And any opportunity I can get,
To collect free manure...
I jump and grab it immediately.
On the other hand...
Some of that indecisive crap,
I hear coming from the mouths of those...
Riding along AND ignoring the view,
Provides for me no benefit at all.
And I can tell from the horse's expression,
There is something I do with something 'he' does...
I am getting for free!
And at his expense.
And I can tell by the look in his eyes,
He has become suspicious as to why...
When I ride,
I am the only one who feeds him carrots! '
I see!
So you prefer the rear view?
'That depends on the time of the year.
And what I am willing,
To sit through to listen and hear.
Some crap is more beneficial than others.'
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
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Yes, but if you take that crap and put a star in it, then you've got something.