Lesbian humor isn't trying to sell anything, it doesn't have to sell out. Coming out as a lesbian onstage is still a very political act; if it weren't, more women would do it.
quote by Kate Clinton
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Related quotes
Lesbian Woman V 2
Rewrite/parody of the classic Pretty Woman
Lesbian woman stalkin' down my street
Lesbian woman, get away
You're the not I want to meet
Lesbian woman, I don't want you
Believe me
That's the truth
No one who looks as good as me could ever want someone like you
Mercy
Lesbian woman, won't you get away from me
Lesbian woman, surely you can't help but see
Lesbian woman, I'll make it as plain to you as can be
No matter how hard you try
There will never be a you and me
Lesbian woman, no I don't wanna stop a while
Lesbian woman, no I don't wanna talk a while
Lesbian woman, guaranteed you'll never get an orgasm out of me
Lesbian woman, no, no, no
Lesbian woman, just go away
Lesbian woman, you'll just have to move on and forget about me
'Cause I don't want you
My bible says it ain't right
Come on and understand please that there is no maybe
I really don't wannabe your baby
No, no, no
Lesbian woman, you won't be tappin' mine tonight
Lesbian woman, just walk on by
Lesbian woman, I don't give a damn if you cry
Lesbian woman, just walk away
Ok
That's the way it must be, ok
Go on home, it's late
And don't you dare try again tomorrow night
But wait, what is this I feel
What's happening to me?
Is she turning me on?
Is that what's happening to me?
Yeah, I'm gonna let her give it to me
O-oh
O-oh God forgive me
O-oh
O-oh my
Lesbian woman
2008 Ramona Thompson
poem by Ramona Thompson
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Lesbian Woman-V 1
A rewrite/parody of the classic Pretty Woman
Lesbian woman prowling down your street
Lesbian woman, guaranteed I'm the kind of woman you're like to eat
Lesbian woman, you can believe me
It's the truth
No one could do you as good as me
Mercy
Lesbian woman, won't you come over and please me
Lesbian woman, surely you can't help but see
Lesbian woman, I know you must be as horny as me
So tell me baby
Are you hot and bothered tonight?
Just like me
Lesbian woman, lick me a while
Lesbian woman, rub me down a while
Lesbian woman, give the best of your breasts to me
Lesbian woman, oh oh oh
Lesbian woman, do me that way
Lesbian woman, say you'll spend the night with me
Cause I wanna sex you
I'll love you down right
Just say you'll come with me baby
Be mine tonight
Lesbian woman, don't walk on by
Lesbian woman, don't try to lie or deny
Lesbian woman, don't walk away
Ok
If that's the way you wanna be, ok
I guess I'll find another to take home, give them a red hot date
As for you
Baby you'll have another chance tomorrow night
But wait, what do I see?
Is she walking back to me?
Yeah, my baby is walking back to come onto to me
O-oh
Lesbian woman
2008 Ramona Thompson
poem by Ramona Thompson
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Living a Lie
Everyday i wake up lying to myself
Everyday i wake up denying who i am
For the sake of my father
He hates who i am
He hates the fact that i'm a lesbian
But i'm living a lie
I lie to myself everytime i say
That i'm not a lesbian
I'm living a lie
and i can't stand it
It's driving me insane
I wish i could stop lying to myself
I wish he could appcept me
and not just see me for a lesbian,
but for who i really am
but he won't because i'm living a lie
and he doesn't know it
poem by Brandi Young
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I would like to do another piece of fiction dealing with a number of issues: Lesbian parenting, the 1960's, and interracial relationships in the Lesbian and Gay community.
quote by Audre Lorde
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I consider myself a lesbian, but I'm a bisexual lesbian.
quote by Betty Dodson
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Women who love women are Lesbians. Men, because they can only think of women in sexual terms, define Lesbian as sex between women.
quote by Rita Mae Brown
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I think my election is one of several indications that gay and lesbian folk are being brought more into the center of things. I'd like to think that my election signals my bringing of gay and lesbian folk into the center of the church.
quote by Gene Robinson
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There's no such thing as 'hard sell' and 'soft sell.' There's only 'smart sell' and 'stupid sell.'
quote by Leo Burnett
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I became a lesbian because of women, because women are beautiful, strong, and compassionate.
quote by Rita Mae Brown
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Used Car Sales People
With the gift of the gab they would talk their way out of hell
These used car sales people they know how to sell
On their selling ability their jobs are at stake
The more cars they do sell the more commission they do make
On any deals they clinch they have never lost
And your trust on such people can come at a cost
The more cars they sell the more money they get paid
A hard job to succeed in the used car trade,
Shy and sensitive used car sales people one might say are rare
To sell one a car no effort they do spare
They have to sell cars or their boss them will fire
And other used car yard owners as car sales people them will not hire
The more cars they sell the greater is their pay
So to sell you a car they try every which way.
poem by Francis Duggan
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Some women can't say the word lesbian... even when their mouth is full of one.
quote by Kate Clinton
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I am a writer who happens to love women. I am not a lesbian who happens to write.
quote by Jeanette Winterson
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Sell Me A Coat
La la la la la la la la la la la la la
A winters day, a bitter snowflake on my face
My summer girl takes little backward steps away
Jack frost took her hand and left me, jack frost aint so cool
Sell me a coat with buttons of silver
Sell me a coat thats red or gold
Sell me a coat with little patch pockets
Sell me a coat cause I feel cold
And when she smiles, the ice forgets to melt away
Not like before, her smile was warming yesterday
See the trees like silver candy, feel my icy hand
Sell me a coat with buttons of silver
Sell me a coat thats red or gold
Sell me a coat with little patch pockets
Sell me a coat cause I feel cold
See my eyes, my window pane
See my tears like gentle rain
Thats the memory of a summer day
Sell me a coat with buttons of silver
Sell me a coat thats red or gold
Sell me a coat with little patch pockets
Sell me a coat cause I feel cold
Sell me a coat with buttons of silver
Sell me a coat thats red or gold
Sell me a coat with little patch pockets
Sell me a coat cause I feel cold
La la la la la la
song performed by by David Bowie
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Well, I always looked at Mulan as a movie about a lesbian coming out.
quote by Harvey Fierstein
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It's a cosmic joke that I'm a lesbian, because I understand men so well but women are a complete mystery to me.
quote by Lea DeLaria
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My dad was a ham, too. He could sell those women anything. Of all his sons, I was the only one he could trust to sell as well as he could. I was proud of that.
quote by Paul Lynde
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But the true feminist deals out of a lesbian consciousness whether or not she ever sleeps with women.
quote by Audre Lorde
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When you sell a man a book, you don't sell him 12 ounces of paper and ink and glue - you sell him a whole new life.
quote by Christopher Morley
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To me, celebrity doesn't mean a whole lot unless you're willing to use it. So I wanted to use it in a different way, with my AIDS work, the human rights stuff for the gay and lesbian community and the speaking I do.
quote by Judith Light
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Fed On Antiquated Qualities
He is his lover,
Yes.
That she is a lesbian...
No one yet of that has guessed.
Lives lived to be happy,
Isn't for them to confess.
What they have between them,
Is for them that is best.
He sees himself as strong and brave.
And she respects that.
Having her own path to pave.
And both are independent.
Defending the choices they've made.
Emotionally,
They have been freed from sexual conflicts.
To live in a society...
Breast fed on antiquated qualities.
In a world that keeps evolving...
From descriptions that depict,
What is and should not be!
He is his lover,
Yes.
That she is a lesbian...
No one yet of that has guessed.
And fewer today spend their time concerned.
Is this a process of a higher conciousness?
Perhaps that is what we are here to witness,
And learn.
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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