We do have a zeal for laughter in most situations, give or take a dentist.
quote by Joseph Heller
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Crocodile's Toothache
Oh the Crocodile
Went to the dentist
And sat down in the chair,
And the dentist said, 'Now tell me, sir,
Why does it hurt and where?'
And the Crocodile said, 'I'll tell you the truth.
I have a terrible ache in my tooth.'
And he opened his jaws so wide, so wide,
That the dentist he climbed right inside,
And the dentist laughed, 'Oh, isn't this fun?'
As he pulled the teeth out, one by one.
And the Crocodile cried, 'You're hurting me so!
Please put down your pliers and let me go.'
But the dentist just laughed with a Ho Ho Ho,
And he said, 'I still have twelve to go --
Oops, that's the wrong one, I confess.
But what's one crocodile's tooth, more or less?'
Then suddenly the jaws went snap,
And the dentist was gone right off the map.
And where he went one could only guess...
To North or South or East or West...
He left no forwarding address.
But what's one dentist more or less?
poem by Sheldon Allan Silverstein
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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A dentist's assistant named Jule
saw a blister appear on his tool.
Said the dentist 'don't fret
it's the girl that you met
from the Queensland Venereal School.'
quote by by Herbert Nehrlich
Submitted by Dan Costinaş
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Theses officers were good friends, so it must have been a terrible argument, because the one who played chess with my father was so angry that he walked over to the dentist's house and got the dentist out of bed and shot him.
quote by Bruno Schulz
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Dentist Chair (Fun Poem 99)
Everyone hates the dentist
some much more than me.
Just the thought of the drill
and the light in your eyes
puts the chills up me.
One of my worst encounters
of the dentist chair came in the 1960’s
when a cold in a tooth made my face swell
on one side like a melon
and I could only drink through a straw.
They knocked me out to remove the tooth.
Having no recovery room
they put me back in the waiting room
and sat me in a chair out there.
It was the dawn of the plastic moulded ones
and the one I sat on was so slippery
I kept slipping down.
I mumbled aloud about the dentist being no good.
Some of his patients took one look at me
and decided I was right, then made a hasty exit
from the waiting room.
With the side of my face swollen to the size of a melon
I can understand why.
Another encounter with a dentist
was quite a few years later.
A different dentist with a wholly different approach.
He was having his waiting room decorated
and I was the only one there.
He came in with a Cheshire grin across his face.
“Mr Harris, do you mind if this gentleman
takes out your teeth today? ”
Being I and thinking it was a student,
I said I didn’t mind.
The dentist then said, “He is my interior decorator.”
The smile still implanted on his face.
I nearly ran out of there.
Now the third tale concerns my wife
and she fears the dentist even more than me.
She had an appointment
and when we arrived,
the surgery was closed for lunch.
We went for a little walk
and all the cars we passed had dents in the side.
“See that.” I said.
“Yes.” She replied.
“That’s what the dentist does
when he can’t get his own way.”
As we approached, a corner
there was a church on the other side.
“Why don’t you nip in there for a quick pray
that the dentist doesn’t come back? ”
She thumped me I wonder why.
As we walked back to the surgery I assured her,
that everything was going to be OK.
They calm you as soon as you walk in.
She looked at me suspiciously and asked how?
They have a big mallet just above the door
and bop you on the head as you walk in.
Your teeth fall out in the process
and the job is done.
Now I wonder why she has never asked me
to go to the dentist with her again.
1 April 2009
poem by David Harris
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Put you energy into music. If it fails you, you can become an accountant or a dentist. And then if you become a dentist or an accountant, it's too late to become a musician afterwards.
quote by Peter Tork
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Now, most dentist's chairs go up and down, don't they? The one I was in went back and forwards. I thought 'This is unusual'. And the dentist said to me 'Mr Vine, get out of the filing cabinet.
Un-believable Situations
Un-believable situations,
Leave a lump in a throat.
And those,
Un-believable situations...
Can leave a weight on shoulders,
Whether one is young on older.
No matter who's brave or bold.
Stricken with heat or fever,
No matter who's brave or bold.
Those un-believable situations,
Can warm a heart...
Or turn it cold.
Few are prepared for what they can not see.
When surprised by situations.
Many choke up and can not breathe,
When confronted by situations...
Shocking and unbelieved.
Stricken with heat or fever,
No matter who's brave or bold.
Those un-believable situations,
Can warm a heart...
Or turn it cold.
Those un-believable situations,
Always stun the ones who disbelieve.
Those un-believable situations,
Come to bring some to their knees.
Those un-believable situations,
Always stun the ones who disbelieve.
Those un-believable situations,
Come to bring some to their knees.
Those un-believable situations,
Always stun the ones who disbelieve.
Those un-believable situations,
Come to bring some to their knees.
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Meanings are not determined by situations, but we determine ourselves by the meanings we give to situations.
quote by Alfred Adler
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Heather's Lesson
Survive, thrive in difficult situations.
Glow like heather and smile with glory.
Serving deserving, deserve admiration
Survive, thrive in difficult situations.
Exist to help others in habitation
and be protective like heather's story,
Survive, thrive in difficult situations.
Glow your face and smile with glory.
***
Survive, thrive in difficult situations,
Dare to take care of the creatures.
Being selfless give help to everyone;
Survive, thrive in difficult situations.
Tells Heather: serving get admiration.
Smile, while spreading color and flavor;
Survive, thrive in difficult situations,
Dare to take care of the creatures
poem by S.D. Tiwari
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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The Dentist Appointment
On Thursday morning, I have to see the Dentist;
Cancelling the appointment, I am trying to resist.
I just don't know if I will be able to do it;
I don't know if I can put myself through it.
To help myself relax, and help allay my fears.
I am planning to plug my iPod into my ears
If, with my favourite music, my ears are filled,
It will drown out the sound of the dreaded drill.
Whenever I think about it, I feel extremely tense.
The relief I'll feel, when it's over, will be immense.
In the pit of my stomach, I get bouts of butterflies;
A few times, in secret, I've even had a little cry.
On my last trip to the Dentist, my eyes sprung a leak,
And my fingers gripped tightly to the edge of my seat.
The needle which they use, feels me with such fright,
So I'll lie there tomorrow, and shut my eyes really tight.
On Thursday morning, I'm the first one in the chair;
I'm hoping that this will make it a tad easier to bear.
But what if, the situation, I really just cannot face?
What if, away from the surgery, I then quickly race?
My Dentist does his real best to put me at ease;
He is really friendly, and looks slightly Chinese.
But, if I keep myself calm, and be really brave,
My teeth, my Dentist, will then be able to save.
poem by Angela Wybrow
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A Prayer
Dear Lord
Give me the gift of laughter
for each day
laughter with hope
to greet the coming of each dawn
and faith that never dies
give me the gift of laughter
instead of sighs
poem by Meggie Gultiano
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Zeal
Your zeal and my zeal,
Great cloud of witness to take us through;
But Adam and Eve fell into sin.
Of fleshly fathers to correct us,
Of fleashly mothers to care for us,
But to the great gathering of love is what we need.
Chasten your children and teach them the zeal of life,
For the great cloud of witness is with zeal.
My love is higher than the heavens and,
My works are easily noted by you;
But i will wander into the deserts and the mountains.
Perfected is my love by faith,
And i will to you very soon;
But let your zeal lead you on always.
poem by Edward Kofi Louis
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You can turn painful situations around through laughter. If you can find humor in anything, even poverty, you can survive it.
quote by Bill Cosby
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Maybe
Maybe you could take a lil' piece of my pain
Maybe you can make it all feel the same
Maybe you can burn this night in my brain
Maybe you can find someone else to blame
For all this pain
Maybe
Maybe you could tell me about your worst fear
Don't say it out loud, whisper in my ear
Ain't never felt nothing' like this here
Maybe you can see things a lil' more clear
Dry away your tear
I love you are just three words that are overused when we're talking
Love and friendship, situations get confusing so often
Maybe I should give this woman my namea piece of my pain
Maybe
Maybe we can talk about all my dreams
Watch them all come apart at the seams
Sometimes when it rains it really teams
Sometimes they cut diamonds with laser beams..whatever that means
I love you are just three words that are overused when we're talking
Love and friendship, situations get confusing so often
Maybe I should give this woman my timethat would be fine
Maybe
I love you are just three words that are overused when we're talking
Love and friendship, situations get confusing so often
Maybe I should give this woman my namea piece of my pain
Maybe
song performed by by Everlast
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Live by this credo: have a little laugh at life and look around you for happiness instead of sadness. Laughter has always brought me out of unhappy situations.
quote by Red Skelton
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Give Me Love
(graham russell)
Im tired enough, oh Im tired
And I feel so weighed down
I dont want failure while my whole life waits around
I need a love just like the rest
And Ive waited now so long
I dont take what I can
So I dont find love within
Oh, give me a chance to show some affection
Let something show
Im the one that said it
Im the one who needs you now
(chorus)
Oh, give me love
Give me love and laughter
Give me love, love, love and laughter
Give me love, give me love and laughter
Give me love, love, love and laughter
Im with you now and thats all right
But I need more than your touch
Show me where your heart lies
Now I feel like letting go
I could fall so easy for you
And I wouldnt even try
Your love lies lost in me
Keep on kissing mine good-bye
Oh, say the words say you get lonely
Just let me know
You will never regret it
And youll never be lonely again
(chorus)
Love, dont take it away
Dont throw it away on somebody
I know theres no one else who needs you more than me
(repeat chorus to fade)
song performed by by Air Supply
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Cindy Perl, Thanks for Nothing
Thanks for nothing, Cindy Perl.
After five long years of dating-
Movies, concerts, masticating-
You decided David Tepper’s not for you.
You needed one who'd make you smile
And provide for your lifestyle.
So you went and wed a dentist-
Good for you.
All that Tepper’s managed since
is Four Billion more or le$$.
He has a mansion in the Hamptons
by the shore.
Cindy, you backed the wrong horse-
But don’t go getting a divorce.
Your dentist fills your cavities
For you
poem by John F. McCullagh
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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The Inward Beauty
Laughter the inward beauty
You come with Joy
So full & fresh
You come with happiness
The cure in sadness
You come with excitement
Mending the broken
Laughter the medicine
To our body & soul
The strength you give
The passion to carry on
When you come
Always within
Always on time
Ready to flow
Laughter, the inward beauty
so true, so faithful
Our inward beauty, laughter
poem by Fiefa Bruce
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To a fellow poet
What can I give you –
for only giving can I think of,
in this dark season of the year
which needs no festive name, to name the need…
this dark season, when hearts yearn
for all that’s bright, and warm, and love..
what can I give you, at this time?
I give you – music… music, heard
outside the heart’s dark winter door
to say, that all’s not lost; all’s never lost;
there’s music still and always, through the door…
you’ll hear, and know yourself to be that all…
I give you – laughter… laughter, on the face
of strangers, as you open that dark door;
strangers who laughing turn to you
and share their laughter and a proffered hand;
a room of laughter shared with you, illusions laughed away…
As poet gives to poet, these I give you;
they are – but poetry;
as poetry, may live.
*
[occasioned by discussion of ‘the three persons’ in poetry:
the confessional poetry of ‘I’;
the poetry that speaks and gives to ‘you’;
and the poetry of he, she, it, they – of universal truth..]
poem by Michael Shepherd
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Give Me Strength
A lonely man I know myself to be
Its not as bad as some things I have seen.
The picture painted here is not a dream
The only reality is the way it seems.
The happier you fly
The sadder you fall
The laughter in your eyes
Is never all.
Give me strength to move along.
Give me strength to leave my sweetheart.
Im riding down swept road in my old car
The moon is almost full except for stars.
The party ended long before the night
She made me feel alive and thats all right.
The happier you fly
The sadder you fall
The laughter in your eyes
Is never all.
Give me strength to move along.
Give me strength to leave while shes gone.
The happier you fly
The sadder you fall
The laughter in your eyes
Is never all.
Give me strength to move along.
Give me strength to move along.
Give me strength to move along.
song performed by by Neil Young
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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