I noticed that there are no B batteries. I think that's to avoid confusion, cause if there were you wouldn't know if someone was stuttering. 'Yes, hello I'd like some b-batteries.' 'What kind?' 'B-batteries.' 'What kind?' 'B-batteries!' and D-batteries that's hard for foreigners. 'Yes, I would like de batteries.'
quote by Demetri Martin
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Love Toy
Doo wop bop
When it comes to boys
Mamma always said
Never let any temptation
Go to your head
Doo wop bop
Oh but its so tempting so delicious
When I kiss your lips
When I feel your fingertips
Cause ooh, you my love toy
No batteries required
Ooh youre my love toy
Wind me up and I start to move
Ooh youre my love toy
No batteries required
No, no, no Id be so ashamed
Beisdes Ive got my reputation to maintain
Must you be so darn persistent
Tryin to make me weak
bout to knock me off my feet
Ooh, you my love toy
No batteries required
Ooh youre my love toy
Wind me up and I start to move
Ooh youre my love toy
No batteries required
Doo wop bop, ooi ooi doo wop, doo wop bop
You are always on the sly
When I see you smiling
With that look in your eyes
Whispering those little secrets
You really turn me on
Doo wop bop
Makes me wanna have more fun
Ooh, you my love toy
No batteries required
Ooh youre my love toy
Wind me up and I start to move
Ooh youre my love toy
No batteries required
Ooh...que rico
Ooi ooi doo wop bop
No batteries required
Ooi ooi doo wop bop
Love toy
Ooi ooi doo wop bop
No batteries required
Ooi ooi doo wop bop
Love toy
song performed by by Gloria Estefan
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Batteries Not Included
Six oclock in the morning
Wake up by the bed
There sits a japanese toy
And I like it
See the name on the wrapping
Cant read yet but I know
Its made for me (lucky boy)
And I want it
Lights that flash, wheels that go round
Digital display
Fresh silicon chips to enjoy
And I need them
(wheres the batteries? )
Sitting silent and empty
Wish I could breathe life
In my new friend whos terribly still
And I like him
Just like me. prhaps hes hungry.
Six volts make him smile
And twelve volts would probably kill
How I like him
Daddy, wheres the batteries
I cant find my batteries
(theres no batteries)
Seven oclock in the morning
They find me by the bed
With my friend the japanese toy
I am with him
Mummy, daddy --- cant see you,
Hear you. batteries not
Included in this little boy
(wheres my batteries? )
song performed by by Jethro Tull
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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For example, a breakthrough in better batteries could supplant hydrogen. Better solar cells could replace or win out in this race to the fuel of the future. Those, I see, as the three big competitors: hydrogen, solar cells and then better batteries.
quote by Bob Inglis
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Fresh Air Waltz
Looking at you now, you seem just a shadow
You had the energy to recharge our batteries
I suppose your success became your security
Darkness is not what you need
You were the one who refused to give up
You were the one who lifted us, lifted us off our knees
Now its our turn to give you some help
Fresh air thats just what you need
Not the stale bread from the failing bitter table
Its so hard
Wheres the justice we cry
Its there and will follow us til the day we die, til
The day that we die
Looking at you know, you seem just a shadow
You had the energy and you recharged our batteries
Now its our turn to give you some help
Fresh air thats just what you need
Now its our turn to give you some help
Fresh air thats just what you need
Thats just what you need
song performed by by Howard Jones
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Vibrator
Is it my imagination
Or are U with the boys again?
U used 2 take me with U
I used 2 be your best friend
When U finally come home
Your car ain't got no gasoline
That's OK, baby
Cuz my new love treats me like a queen
Eat your heart out
CHORUS:
Vibrator makes me feel so good
Vibrator - don't U wish U could?
Vibrator - his patience can't be beat
Vibrator - I guess U could say that U're obsolete
Ha ha ha ha ha ha
It must be my imagination
Cuz I know I didn't hear U laugh
U'd be surprised what I do when U're through
Taking your macho bath
Uncharted waters sailed with ease
Land is always in sight
But with U it's always abandon ship (abandon ship)
And we didn't even get away from the dock 2night
Eat your heart out
CHORUS
Is it my imagination
Are U with the boys again?
U used 2 take me with U
I used 2 be your best friend
But now I'm just a plaything
Your ego-feeding female sex machine
Well U can take a hike, mister
Cuz U're the poorest excuse 4 a man I've ever seen!
Eat your heart out, sucker!
CHORUS
Vibrator makes me feel so good
Vibrator makes me feel so good
Uh oh, oh no!
Please don't die on me no
(Vibrator) {repeat in BG}
May I help U?
Yes, I was wondering if U had batteries 4 my bo...
Oh my God!
Look at the size of that thing!
Where did U get this?
Look, U got batteries or not?
Oh sure, we have batteries
They're in the storage room
Tell U what
I'll just take this downstairs and put them in myself
No, I'll tell U what, U and your rubber glove can go downstairs
And I'll take my business elsewheres
Now gimme this! Jeez!
Well, what do U want?
Goodness!
Goodness, nothing!
Baby, I'm busy
What do U want?!!
Do have any batteries that will fit my body massager?
Body massager? Please!
Right, U see my back's been acting up lately and...
Yeah, my back's been acting up 2
In fact, it acts up every time my boyfriend leaves
No, really, my back...
Save it honey, put it in the bank
I know what's happening
Here, these oughta work
Yeah, yeah, that'll work
Thank U!
Yeah, yeah, go on, get outta here!
Thank U so much, thank U!
Yeah, so get..
Body mas.. please!
(Vibrator) {repeats in BG}
G-spot, g-spot, where, oh where..
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
Ready or not, here I come
Oh yeah
Oh, here I come
Oh yeah
Here I.. here I.. here I come!
Now
song performed by by Prince
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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I bought some batteries, but they weren't included.
quote by Steven Wright
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Not even the TV remote control obeys if you don't know how to change its batteries.
aphorism by Hasier Agirre, translated by Dan Costinaş
Submitted by Dan Costinaş
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I once bought my kids a set of batteries for Christmas with a note on it saying, toys not included.
quote by Bernard Manning
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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This is our lance. See, you're making me laugh about this now, because there have been a few jokes on the set about what they actually look like. But, see, I personally think they'd be a great toy. So... just batteries aren't included.
quote by Kevin Sorbo
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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The Hardy Boys burned me out. I was recharging my batteries. It was time to return to work, but it was tough because my visibility was low.
quote by Parker Stevenson
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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A little before noon I sent orders to all my batteries to open fire through the streets or at any points where the troops were seen about the city, as a diversion in favor of Jackson.
quote by James Longstreet
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Holographic Jaguar
a walking skeleton,
dc batteries for brains
i don't want to need
to have to plug
into anything or anyone
for power or illumination,
my eyes rings you pull
on hand grenades soon
as enemy is sighted
poem by Doug Bentley
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Hanna
Recharge your batteries and come to me my sweet love,
For i am flexible and i know how to handle you;
But the circumstances of life is like,
Hanna your friend sitting alone at the bay waiting for the birds to fly over.
poem by Edward Kofi Louis
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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The results would have stayed on the watch face until the batteries died. But trying to make time stand still this way would have been a mistake. It is just as important to erase times eventually as to save them at first.
quote by Joe Henderson
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Of your own indefatigable labor from early dawn and of your explicit instructions, that the batteries should reserve their ammunition, until the grand charge should commence, for which the enemy were undoubtedly preparing.
quote by John Bigelow
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Neira
Charge your batteries and be ready for my love,
For the temple of your love is like the message of the peace of Neira.
poem by Edward Kofi Louis
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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We all walk in the ocean of darkness
With uncertainties as our enemies
Some cry with uneven pathways they try
Flashlights can be used but few can buy
Reminder: flashlights do have batteries.
quote by by Borgjie Distura
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Radiance
To bask themselves in radiance,
They purchased flourescent lamps.
Believing they could energize,
And show this...
Without the required batteries needed.
Since they perceived themselves,
To have followed instructions.
'That comes from the 'inside'.'
~OH?
But where are the outlets to plug them in? ~
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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It was supposed to be a year or two just to refresh my batteries, but I moved to Silicon Valley in the early 90's, and one thing let to another, got very involved in high tech, and formed a company and it ended up doing pretty well.
quote by Thomas Dolby
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Earthly minds, like mud walls, resist the strongest batteries; and though, perhaps, somethimes the force of a clear argument may make some impression, yet they nevertheless stand firm, keep out the enemy, truth, that would captivate or disturbe them.
quote by John Locke
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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