I do like beer, but lately I've started drinking non-alcoholic beer and I like the taste of it and I don't get the alcohol, so that's a good alternative also.
quote by Mike Ditka
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Related quotes
Paintings are like a beer, only beer tastes good and it's hard to stop drinking beer.
quote by Billy Carter
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Chug-a-lug
Here a mug, there a mug, everybody chug-a-lug
Here a mug, there a mug, everybody chug-a-lug
Gary likes a girls tight black pants
Larry knows he doesnt stand a chance
Carl says hurry up and order it quick
Dave gets out to chase that chick
Dennis wonders whats under the hood
A big chrome tach and it sounds real good
I go down to the root beer stand
And drink up all that I can
Give me some root beer (chug-a-lug chug-a-lug chug-a-lug)
Give me some root beer (chug-a-lug chug-a-lug chug-a-lug)
Give me some root beer (chug-a-lug chug-a-lug chug-a-lug)
Cold beer, root beer
Here a mug, there a mug, everybody chug-a-lug
Brians still glued to the radio
Louies lookin out the rear window
Guys got around to orderin fries
But root beers my best buy
Give me some root beer (chug-a-lug chug-a-lug chug-a-lug)
Give me some root beer (chug-a-lug chug-a-lug chug-a-lug)
Give me some root beer (chug-a-lug chug-a-lug chug-a-lug)
Cold beer, root beer
Here a mug, there a mug, everybody chug-a-lug
Give me some root beer (chug-a-lug chug-a-lug chug-a-lug)
Give me some root beer (chug-a-lug chug-a-lug chug-a-lug)
Give me some root beer (chug-a-lug chug-a-lug chug-a-lug)
Cold beer, root beer
Here a mug, there a mug, everybody chug-a-lug
Root beer, need another mug now
Root beer, chug-a-lug-a-lug now
Root beer, need another mug now
Root beer, chug-a-lug-a-lug now
Root beer, need another mug now
Root beer, chug-a-lug-a-lug now
song performed by by Beach Boys
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Drunken Dancing Fish
An old man fishing
Sat all day in his boat
Drinking beer
Watching the bobber float
Perhaps it was the alcohol
Or the rocking to and fro
But he swore he saw
A fish come up and dance a do si do!
So quickly
It was gone
But the staggering effect of it
Like a hangover, lingered on long
He sold the boat
And gave up beer
Now he drinks ginger ale
And only hunts deer
poem by Smoky Hoss
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Beer Bong
If I want some beer
I don't want to hear
About how I missed the show
Because I drink to slow
So pass me the beer bong
It wont take very long
For me to put down
This torpedo to the ground
Because drinking beer is to slow
Beer bong is the way to go
To go to go
Don't drink to slow!
song performed by by NOFX
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Beer Song
If I want some beer I dont want to hear about how I missed the show
Because I drink to slow so pass me the beer bong it wont take very long
For me to put down this torpedo to the ground because drinking beer is too
Slow beer bong is the way to go to go to go dont drink too slow !
song performed by by NOFX
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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60% Proof
alcoholic drinks
are measured by their
percent proof,
For example,
a 'six proof' beer
would have 3% alcohol,
barely any,
while a strong liqueur
that advertised it was 80 proof
would have
40% alcohol.
It isn't, however, quite that simple...
there are other
complications, but that
is not my point
here,
what about poetry?
what kind of
proof is this
poetry that makes
you drunk?
or do you want
something to make
you sober?
you get high?
you want to?
ah, try putting
alcohol in your
words,
give it the
kind of proof
needed,
then say, ahh,
this is real poetry
this certain relief
from the harsh
realities of our lives,
this ahhh,
ahhhh, ahhhh
oh God!
poem by Ric S. Bastasa
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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It was my first scene. My first day. We could have started with me drinking a beer, something a little less than having Barbies touching each other. But they started with that.
quote by Gisele Bundchen
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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If you ever reach total enlightenment while you're drinking a beer, I bet it makes beer shoot out your nose.
Jack Handey in Deep Thoughts
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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I never had one beer. If I bought a six-pack of beer, I kept drinking till all six beers were gone. You have to have that kind of understanding about yourself. I haven't had a drink now in 12 years.
quote by Samuel L. Jackson
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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The Croaking Toad And The Leopard Frog
The croaking toad and the leopard frog,
Were drinking beer on a hollow log.
And the croaking toad said, you're my best bud,
Man you can really hold your suds.
And the leopard frog replied in kind,
Another friend like you, I couldn't find.
You're my best friend when skies are grey,
You're by my side come what may.
I'd rather drink my beer with you,
Than catch blue bottles the whole day through.
Let's drink one more to the breaking dawn,
While we listen quietly to the crickets song.
But the croaking toad said I must go,
I'm very sleepy and the cock just crowed.
I'll see you tonight for a cold one or two,
I really love this black swamp brew.
And the leopard frog said I'll be here,
With my styrofoam ice chest sitting near.
Just bring some peanuts when you come round,
With beer they taste so good going down.
6/8/11 Alton Texas
poem by Juan Olivarez
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Jenny's Husband
He has no taste for alcohol not even a light beer
And she says that he should be named the husband of the year
He changes the baby's nappy and cooks the evening tea
And she feels very happy to have one good as he.
he's never once been on the dole he gives her all his pay
And he's the greatest worker at least that's what she say
The bank account is in her name and Jenny runs the show
And for women's liberation she's struck a mighty blow.
She talks of Billy 'two doors down' his conduct a disgrace
And if she were married to him she would put him in his place
He spends his night down at the pub and comes home after ten
She cannot understand how women tolerate such men.
But if Billy were her husband she would not have her own way
And he'd go to the pub at night and not give her all his pay
And their marriage would not last too long for lack of harmony
But her George is very different as he bends quite easily.
She boast about her husband George he walks the narrow line
And he doesn't have any vices which seems to suit her fine
And alcohol doesn't pass his lips not even a light beer
And she at least has proclaimed him the husband of the year
poem by Francis Duggan
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Scotch Is A Secret
If drunken is a verb, then death is one too,
For they both induce violence, and if not, radical truth.
If a last wistful breath is what's seen as a plea,
Then please, gentle secrecy; let me fall down to knee.
Whiskey is a worry, and vodka is a vice,
I may once taste sweet blissful beer, but only once or twice.
Preach for the obvious, the sacred; the life;
Hypocrite be an innocent; a daughter a wife.
Let us all hide our secrets, behind the worrisome wine,
Charming be the chardonnay, as we taste flask flat beer fine.
Let the priest sip clandestine champagne,
And let all be right with the world,
Let a liar be justified a fight,
And a mute have the option of word.
If all of this be true; and the alcohol stable a fire;
Then let scotch be kept my secret,
And I, a truthful liar.
poem by Dayna Mortimore
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For the second straight year, craft beer is the fastest growing segment of the U.S. alcoholic beverage industry. In 2005, craft beer experienced a 9 percent increase in volume, nearly triple that of the growth experienced in the wine and spirits industry.
quote by Sherwood Boehlert
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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We're basically after Joe's beer money, and Joe likes his beer, so you better make sure that what you give him is at least as pleasurable to him as having his six-pack of beer would be.
quote by Jerry Pournelle
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Prerequisites to a poem
This is hard to reveal..so so much for zeal.
Before writing a poem, I have no clue what it might be.
First I think of a subject, love life or the weather
The colors in forests or the sweet taste of nectar.
Then I think about women and the color of thier hair
Their lips and their curves and the brakes that I lost.
Then suddenly an inspiration. A passing thing many times,
For a beer gave me other thoughts good for the job.
Reality sets in and I know I have to write something,
Good wrong or right. Thinking and thinking, I continue drinking.
Go shea your a poet and most people know it,
What a sad tale might show up.
So I made a promise to give beer a break
And the next verse I write will be straight from my heart
With a hot cup of tea for my readers and a shot just for me.
Cold Beer, Women and Music
I like cold beer on a hot day
I like hot women on a cold day
I like music on a hot or cold day
I like to have cold beer in my pad
I like to have my women scantily clad
I like to have my music not bad
I like my cold beer enshrouded
I like my women endowed
I like my music loud
I like my cold beer in my right hand
I like my women tanned
I like my music close at hand
I like cold beer to unwind
I like women to dine
I like music to remind
I like cold beer with women
I like women with cold beer
I like cold beer and women with music
poem by Bill Kamen
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Forbidden Fruit
Eight days to beer! A sigh sweeps thro' the nation
Sweeps like a gale from 'Frisco to New York.
('Say! But it's tough, this long anticipation.
Oh boy! I'm rarin' to get at that cork!')
Six days to beer! Was ever waiting bleaker?
And how the dull days drag their slow length by!
('Aw, say! Just let me at a foamin' beaker!
But, nothin' doin'. I'm a legal guy.')
Four days to beer! How slowly Time is creeping,
Turning the pages with a laggard hand.
('Say, honey, dope me so that I stay sleeping
Until the glorious Sixth dawns o'er the land.')
Two days to beer! ('Shucks, I can't wait much longer!')
One day to beer! To luscious, legal beer!
('Ah, hold me, honey! help me to be stronger....
Now, attaboy! The glorious Sixth is here!!..')
'Here's how! ... Say! What's the stunt? This stuff is phoney!
It aint got no kick! It palls! It disappoints!
It's just the stuff that guys like Al Capone
An' such tough eggs sell in speakeasy joints!
Here's me, been lookin' for a time right regal,
Lickin' me lips an' rarin' to begin...
Sure, this is beer, all right; but now it's legal.
It don't taste half so good... Say, pass the gin'
poem by Clarence Michael James Stanislaus Dennis
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Is Austerity Possible
Liquids: are alcohol and gasoline
The friends of man, food for thought?
I have bumbled through many thorny nights,
Heavily drinking ethanol,
And many a stormy day with beer in hand;
And I pumped gallons of gas
Into strangers' tanks as well as my own,
To travel to far-off deserts,
Where drinking alcohol like am idiot,
I tore up off-road tracks in the land that I love. It was foolhardy.
They call it democracy.
But, rather, I would fain substitute
Powders-psych meds I need to take,
Combined with recreational pharmaceuticals,
In which powder,
Condensed into pills,
Or encapsulated into capsules,
Tear up the brain I love,
Are not a friend of mine,
But open up a spacious nature
Superior to liquids and gases.
poem by Stan Petrovich
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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The Path To Rightousness
SOME FRIENDS WERE SEATED AT A BEER PARLOUR DRINKING BEER! ALL OF A SUDDEN A MAN WALKED IN AND SAID, MERRY MEN! A LIQUOR CONTEST IS ABOARD!
HOORAY! SHOUTED THE JOLLY FELLOWS! JUST THEN A PREACHER WALKED IN WITH HIS HOLY SCRIPTURES AND SHOUTED OUT FOR ALL TO HEAR, WIDE IS THE PATH THE LEADS TO DESTRUCTION! REPENT OF THY ALCHOHOLIC WAYS AND FOLLOW THE PATHS OF RIGHTOUSNESS!
JUST THEN A WELL KNOWN WHORE WALKED INTO THE PARLOUR AND ON SIGHTING THE PREACHER, SHE QUICKLY SEIZED HIM BY HIS BELT!
THE SURPRISED FELLOWS ALL CAME TOGETHER AND ENQUIRED OF HER, SAYING, WHAT BE THY PROBLEM THAT YOU TROUBLE THIS RIGHTOUS MAN? AND SHE REPLIED, HE HAS REFUSED TO PAY ME FOR MY SERVICES, THRICE I HAVE ALLOWED HIM MY PLEASURES ON CREDIT, BUT ALAS! TODAY HE MUST PAY!
THE STUNNED FELLOWS ALL BECAME SILENT AND WENT BACK TO THEIR BEER DRINKING!
poem by Overlord Don Manuel Ihcakeyno
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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House Of The Gods
Finally found a place they could never reach
Sipping singha beer on pattaya beach
Singha beer dont ask no questions
Singha beer dont tell no lies
Singha beer dont ask no questions
Singha beer dont tell no lies
Theres a guy next to me wont tell me his name
Buys me mekong whiskey just the same
Singha beer dont ask no questions
Singha beer dont tell no lies
Singha beer dont ask no questions
Singha beer dont tell no lies
Im just a wally
Hanging out on pattaya beach
Im just a wally
Hanging out on pattaya beach
Met a girl said shes really going to blow my mind
She says she dont mean sex and I say alright
Turns out shes a bloke, tries to give me head
I have to run out screaming to the street instead
Shes just a wally
Hanging out on pattaya beach
Im just a wally
Hanging out on pattaya beach
Singha beer dont ask no questions
Singha beer dont tell no lies...
In the house of the gods
Where no mongrels preach
I watched the sun going down
On pattaya beach
Im just a wally
Hanging out on pattaya beach
Im just a wall
Hanging out on pattaya beach
song performed by by Pogues
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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