Diets, like clothes, should be tailored to you.
quote by Joan Rivers
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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They sent me to these places to get the weight off. The diets never worked; the diets actually made it worse.
quote by Lisa Whelchel
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Total Breakdown
Total breakdown.
In respect.
Total breakdown.
In discipline one should get.
Total breakdown.
Of relationships.
Keeping one happy and safe...
Would be a miracle to escape,
Any cracks appearing in it.
Total breakdown.
Of societies!
Without outside interference,
To proclaim how they should or should not be.
Total breakdown.
Witnessed in mentalities.
And bad diets can be the reason.
Bad diets can account for most of these.
Total breakdown.
Complete.
With few left to mend,
The inefficiencies.
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Don't Eat More Eat Less
I weigh myself every day,
But it's all to no avail,
Despite countless diets I can say,
I was always doomed to fail.
Each day I only eat three meals,
Breakfast a sandwich then dinner,
If you only knew just how that feels,
You wouldn't class me as a sinner.
Yes I have the occasional snack,
But it's not a meal as such,
A chocolate biscuit gets me flak,
But to me it's not that much.
I take some sweets to calm me down,
The odd one I'm allowed,
Packets that is but don't you frown,
With will power I am endowed.
I really love my crisps and juice,
Jelly babies I can't resist,
I totally adore my chocolate mousse,
My desserts I've never missed.
Alcohol I'm told is perfectly fine,
If it's taken in moderation,
So I drink a daily bottle of wine,
It keeps me in total sedation.
I endeavour to exercise every day,
But it really is a crime,
All that sumptuous food leads me astray,
For activity I can't make the time.
When I jumped on to my weight machine,
All I could hear were haunting wails,
Was it from some ghostly Queen,
No it was coming from my scales.
It's the weight of all those clothes I wear,
It has nothing to do with me,
They make me look the shape of a pear,
That's just fallen from a tree.
One day I'll reach my perfect size,
I'll not predict where or when,
But when I do you'll hear my cries,
I've reached a perfect ten.
Diets have cost me thousands of pounds,
But I should have smelled a rat,
For the thing to me that most confounds,
It's in money not in fat.
Every one tells you the same,
It's the basis of every diet,
It's a con by any other name,
Boil your food don't fry it.
It doesn't matter whether you boil or fry,
Or the type of food you eat,
These special diets are all a lie,
They're all guilty of deceit.
Here's the greatest diet of them all,
It's been around for thousands of years,
The simplicity of it will enthrall,
It won't leave your pockets in tears.
The answer's there it's in your face,
Truth is it's beyond belief,
It's one which we can all embrace,
without giving out cash relief.
What is the answer I hear you ask,
You must relieve us from our stress,
The solution to our thankless task,
'' Don't Eat More Eat Less ''
How To Make a Man
You need four things-
Silicon. quartz, titanium and wit.
Maybe a bit of the old drawing board, for foiled days.
He will be rusty at first,
Until you grant him speech,
To rise above the animals;
And then his desire to know what he is
Will be all-consuming.
It is only natural.
I like the idea of giving him a scowl;
For a robot shouldn't laugh at his maker.
Then a suit of blue clothes,
Nicely tailored for the world of wannabees.
He will make a living, all right.
But to raise a family is like being
A flock of birds in orderly flight.
If he does that, I'll make another:
Every man should have a brother.
poem by Stan Petrovich
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Greasy Fingers You Don't Need 'Em
Would you give up your midnight snack,
Knowing you should not do that?
Oh oh.
Oh. Oh. Oh...
Ooo.
Would you give bad habits back,
If it widened you with fat?
Oh oh.
Oh. Oh. Oh...
Ooo.
Would you minimize your woes,
If you chose not to buy new clothes?
Oh oh.
Oh. Oh. Oh...
Ooo.
Would you get down on the floor,
Exercising even more?
Oh oh.
Oh. Oh. Oh...
Ooo.
If you really want to feel real good,
You've gotta work your butt...
Off!
No diets you can take,
Will erase those pounds you make.
To leave,
You...
Happier each day.
And determining to stay,
That way.
Greasy fingers you don't need 'em!
Would you give up your midnight snack,
Knowing you should not do that?
Oh oh.
Oh. Oh. Oh...
Ooo.
Would you give bad habits back,
If it widened you with fat?
Oh oh.
Oh. Oh. Oh...
Ooo.
If you really want to feel real good,
You've gotta work your butt...
Off!
No diets you can take,
Will erase those pounds you make.
To leave,
You...
Happier each day.
And determining to stay,
That way.
Greasy fingers you don't need 'em!
One day you'll lick,
And pay.
Oh oh.
Oh. Oh. Oh...
Ooo.
Would you give up your midnight snack,
Knowing you should not do that?
Would you give bad habits back,
If it widened you with fat?
Oh oh.
Oh. Oh. Oh...
Ooo.
Ewww!
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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I don't believe in fad diets.
quote by Jenny Craig
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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The clothes back in those days were made so much better than clothes are today. They actually took time to make clothes to fit a woman's body. Today they make clothes that fit sizes, so it stretches to fit this and that.
quote by Debbie Allen
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Cow's diets have never been sustained on grass grown in May.
I think the Iraq War is not particularly tailored to American interests.
quote by Peter Brimelow
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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A song has to become as much a part of you as a tailored suit.
quote by Martha Reeves
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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I never worry about diets. The only carrots that interest me are the number you get in a diamond.
Whatever help we may want from the international community now or in the future, we want to make sure that this help is tailored to help our people to help themselves.
quote by Daw Aung San Suu Kyi
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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As for those grapefruit and buttermilk diets, I'll take roast chicken and dumplings.
quote by Hattie McDaniel
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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I'm very girly. I love to talk about diets, exercise, kids, make-up.
quote by Rachel Hunter
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Everyone would talk about their diets and working out and what it made me do was go to craft services where all the food for the cast and crew was and I would eat.
quote by Kristin Davis
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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I used to be hung up on my figure, but it's a waste of time. I don't believe in diets. Have four pints one night, be healthy the next.
quote by Sophie Ellis-Bextor
Submitted by Veronica Serbanoiu
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I'm a former hippie, so clothes are important to me - your clothes defined you in that period. I guess clothes still defines people. But, I change a lot. I'm in my Brooks Brothers period now.
quote by John Hughes
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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I think that fashion can be a lot of fun. I love clothes, but I recognize that it should only be a hobby. Some clothes that are more design-based look better on women with figures like wire hangers, because that's the nature of the design. I won't wear those clothes.
quote by Anne Hathaway
Submitted by Diana Frone, MTTLC
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Animals in Clothes
Animals in clothes I see
Driving cars or sipping tea
Animals in clothes I see
But they don't know what they are
These animals that drive a car?
Dress in clothes?
Sip the tea?
Just like you
Just like me
Very clever animals they'd be!
But they don't know what they are
These animals that drive a car
Dress in clothes
Sip the tea
Just like you
Just like me
So truly stupid animals they be
Not to realize what they are
Just because they drive a car
Sip the tea
Just like you
Just like me
Oh what stupid things we be
Not to realize what we are
Just because we drive a car
Dress in clothes
Sip the tea
So g-r-a-c-i-o-u-s-l-y!
You and Me
Oh what stupid things we are
Not to realize what we be
Animals that drive a car
Dress in clothes
Sip the tea
You and me
For if Mr Piggy had our brain
Ten fingers
Clothes, and a name
Wouldn't he be just the same?
1986
poem by Egal Bohen
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Yo-yo
Many Diets you follow.
Losing weight like no tomorrow.
And it finally plateau,
You indulge in sweet sorrow.
That's called dieting Yo-Yo.