Suddenly you're like a pirate, you're 65 years old and you've got an earring.
quote by Fred Willard
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I think my wife saw a picture of the rock group Journey, and they're kind of aging, and the one guy had dyed blonde hair with black roots, and... my idea was to get a little earring, I wanted to have a dangling earring.
quote by Fred Willard
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Suddenly
Orbison/melson
Suddenly, my heart stood still
Suddenly, the sight of you gave me a thrill
Suddenly
Suddenly, i see you everywhere
Suddenly, all at once i seem to care for you
Suddenly
So suddenly i found you
To think you were near all the time
I've often been around you
I don't know how i could have been so blind
Suddenly, my world is new
Suddenly, suddenly there's only you
Suddenly
So suddenly i found you
To think you were near all the time
I've often been around you
I don't know how i could have been so blind
Suddenly, suddenly you're my dream come true
Suddenly, suddenly there's only you
So suddenly
song performed by by Roy Orbison
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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I don't really know much about pirates, or pirate culture. I'd be a contrarian pirate.
quote by Todd Barry
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Love Found on Caicos
The beautiful princess rode her
unicorn Stardust
under the full dreamy
moon
On the white sandy beaches
of Caicos
With a gentle sea breeze
kissing her
From her head to her
toes
With a view of the pirate ship on
the aqua blue sea
She saw the rogue pirate
debonaire
Give her a wink and
a smile
The handsome pirate with the
cute derriere
He whistled and called to her
Hey Baby, come with me to
the Secret Isle
I have something special
for you
Plus emeralds rubies sapphires
and diamonds too
poem by Rachel Nichols
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Pondering Pirates
PONDERING PIRATES
Edward Iacona
There has remained a fascination
That has lasted through the years,
Of pirates, ships and the treasures
Of those adventurous buccaneers.
It is very obvious in these times
That pirates are still quite popular
In films and books and games and such
But not the real ones in Somalia.
We also pay them homage
With 'Talk Like a Pirate Day'
So salt yer speech me hearties
And add 'Arrgh' to what you say.
There are pirate costumes for Halloween
Some will buy them and some will make them.
But a real pirate would not ask for treats
He'd just threaten you and take them.
There are the Pittsburgh Pirates
And to further what my case is.
What could those pirates possibly steal
Except for a couple of bases.
There are Neuveau Pirates of today
That have no need to prowl the seas.
They can be found in the local laundromat
Selling inexpensive DVD's
Still some laud the life of pirates,
They will act so and admire it
What always puzzles me is that,
Why do they desire it?
Back in the day a real pirate
Had not much which to aspire;
Rare promotions, no paid benefits
And no security on which to retire.
For all the riches that they stole
Which was a considerable pile
What good did it really do them?
I don't think it changed their life style.
Yet thoughts of pirates still surround us
Be they fiction, real or on a line of scrimmage.
But, no matter how one thinks of them,
It took Disney to change their image.
poem by Edward Iacona
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When everyone around you is doing all this incredible pirate acting and you're having to sort of play the straight guy and move the story forward, you kind of want to be doing some of that pirate ripping it up stuff, but in truth, to be a part of that project is what I love.
quote by Orlando Bloom
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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When Did Youth Go?
When did I stop being a teenager?
When did I stop listening to the radio
from midnight until 2 or 3 a.m. weeknights?
Why was teenage music so empowering?
Why were we so absorbed with the music?
Music which really rocked our wild souls?
Music we danced at local teenage disco too.
Music we drove our parents or first cars too.
Music we drank beer or spirits or partied too.
It seemed we could not live without music.
It seemed we could not meet without music.
It seemed our dreams lived within the beat of music.
Music was part of the fuel which drove our souls.
Music was part of the weekend ever speeding by.
Music was magic drumbeat of hot midnight parties.
Where is the large rocking crowd going?
Where are all the friendly teenagers going?
Where are all those old friends going?
Where where is large trendy rocking crowd going?
Where where are all the friendly teenagers going?
Where where are all those good old friends going?
Suddenly those wild unending party days are over.
Suddenly those exciting unending teenage years are over.
Suddenly those pubs full of our friends are empty.
Suddenly they all suddenly left town.
Suddenly they are all no longer around.
Suddenly they are all in places we don't go.
Suddenly they all suddenly left the old home town.
Suddenly they are all suddenly no longer around.
Suddenly they are all in places we don't know or go.
Where did those teenage years quietly go?
Those teenage friends I used to know?
Where did they all suddenly go?
Where did those teenage years quietly creeping go?
Those lost teenage friends I once upon a time did know?
Where did they all suddenly go exiting a vanishing show?
poem by Terence George Craddock
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Gradually you grow into my life
Gradually you grow into my life,
you reconnoitre my body, soul and spirit
as if you are suddenly starting a new journey,
taking to the road without any fear
and on the way you become part of me
as my own wonderful wife
and before long
I am madly in love with you,
when hours suddenly escape in your presence,
when the morning comes far too suddenly after the night,
when continually I miss you when we are apart,
when small things suddenly do amaze me,
when together we take on weeks, months and years
when as the most lovely woman you are beside me.
poem by Gert Strydom
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A Pirate Called John
I got to know
That pirate called John
Because he has a ship that he
Cruises the whole
Atlantic ocean and then the
Pacific ocean with
Also that pirate John takes his
Bird with him
poem by Aldo Kraas
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A Pirate Hooks
My craving lands like a pirate horde
grappling onto my fleeing ship
swinging on ropes
til they board
in critical numbers
large enough
to overwhelm
my resistance.
They all have the same face
and while my sword is sharp and swift
I'm soon overcome by desire mixed
as pirate laughter rings
throughout my ship
reminding me of what
I like about pirates
and their lust.
For pirates
live on the edge,
laugh low in the guttural throat
they shiver my timbers;
my attraction bursts.
They make me love the pirate life;
unsafe
and a little rough;
but trading off there
smothering boredom
and life freed
from correct complacencies.
Humm.
Who has not inside
a secret pirate heart?
Who would not like to swoop down
and grapple life from stilled ships
and drifting hulks, startle complacent faces
and make off with Life's Treasures?
Who would not choose
life over death?
My Hearty?
poem by Lonnie Hicks
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Note To Self
I found your earring on my bedroom floor,
The only thing that proves you were once here before;
It's funny how absterging it has become my favorite chore.
I don't just think of you anymore,
It's more like reenacted vagary scenes from our lives.
12 shots of Jameson should take me there,
Beyond fear.
More drunk than Keith moon,
I'll see you soon, very soon, you said.
It's been 3 years,6 months and 7 days instead.
If you and I ended with you and I,
Then I guess we are dead.
poem by Jolomi Amuka
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Suddenly
Suddenly I see the forest
behind each single tree.
Suddenly I see stars shine.
They're shining just for me.
Suddenly I know just why
they've all come into view.
It's all because I fell in love.
I fell in love with you.
Suddenly I see the rivers
that form from every stream.
Suddenly I see the pictures
so clearly when I dream.
And suddenly I know just why
I'm never feeling blue.
It's all because I fell in love.
I fell in love with you.
Suddenly from out of the blue
it took me by surprise
that all the things I could not see
were right before my eyes.
And suddenly, so suddenly
I opened up and knew
that it happened when I fell in love.
I fell in love with you.
poem by Edwina Reizer
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Suddenly Silence
Where there was communication,
Suddenly silence.
Where there was conversation,
Suddenly silence.
Where there was interaction,
Suddenly silence.
Where there were possibilities,
Suddenly silence.
Where there was happiness,
Suddenly silence.
So where have you gone,
That suddenly you are silent?
What is your reason that
Suddenly you are silent?
How will I know why
You are suddenly silent?
Must I be suddenly silent, too?
(4.30.7 Inner Thoughts (PFD))
poem by Heather Z. Hanna
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To Prepare for You
To prepare for you
I scrub the soles of my feet
and cut my toenails.
I wash and brush my hair
Flicking it out with my fingers
so each strand will dry fast and sweet
in the breeze of the ceiling fan.
I smooth oil on my elbows, thighs, and knees;
brushing oil from my palms
over my nipples
so they’ll stick to your fingers.
I wrap myself in a silky sarong
choose a cunning earring
which will jangle in your bed
when I shake my hair over you.
Will you notice that I’ve cut my hair?
One side is longer than the other
but I won’t neaten it.
I’ll wear the earring on the long side.
I streak perfume through my hair.
Bought near the Jain temple
in Udaipur
palest green scent distilled from a root
dissolved in oil of sandalwood
Last time I left you
I could smell you in my hair all day.
poem by Kaye Aldenhoven
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The Pirate Cares
The pirate cares for me,
he appears in features too imaginary,
owls want him to burst and fly,
let the assistant of his avoid
the diabolical bold brow of a boy
who dwells on the ship,
before enticing the rascal.
The lover in breezes generated him,
smelling like mud, saying molten children.
The neighbour for him is seldom well
thinking however to bend the aim
provided the city of monsters stirs no hate.
The pirate arrives so he established.
poem by Naveed Akram
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Surprise Me Again
Well I remember the day when she said go away
I rearrange my hair
Well I cant take anymore
I bought some natural food
And then I fell on the floor
Well I cant take anymore
I need a change of address
By the way, why cant you smile
She said at first it was great
And in the middle I stayed
But at the end I was sick
I said Ive got to get out quick
Then you suddenly smiled
You took me by surprise
You suddenly smiled
You took me by again
Well I remember the time
Wrapped up nice and cosy
She was washing my hair
Well I was thinking of midnight, falling in love
Watching the rain fall
When we relax Im going to sleep on your chest
And listen to your beats
And lets go to norway, live in rain and snow
And get totally depressed about nothing
At all really hello
Then you suddenly smiled
You took me by surprise
You suddenly smiled
You took me by again
You suddenly smiled
You suddenly smiled, again and again
You cant smile
Then you suddenly smiled
You took me by surprise
You suddenly smiled
You took me by again
You suddenly smiled
You suddenly smiled
You suddenly smiled
You suddenly smiled
You took me by again
song performed by by Haircut 100
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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The next few years are going to be horrendous in the UK. The last thing we need is a Somali pirate-style raid on the few wealth creators who still dare to navigate Britain's gale-force waters.
quote by Andrew Lloyd Webber
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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The Tale of Custard The Dragon
Belinda lived in a little white house,
With a little black kitten and a little gray mouse,
And a little yellow dog and a little red wagon,
And a realio, trulio, little pet dragon.
Now the name of the little black kitten was Ink,
And the little gray mouse, she called her Blink,
And the little yellow dog was sharp as Mustard,
But the dragon was a coward, and she called him Custard.
Custard the dragon had big sharp teeth,
And spikes on top of him and scales underneath,
Mouth like a fireplace, chimney for a nose,
And realio, trulio, daggers on his toes.
Belinda was as brave as a barrel full of bears,
And Ink and Blink chased lions down the stairs,
Mustard was as brave as a tiger in a rage,
But Custard cried for a nice safe cage.
Belinda tickled him, she tickled him unmerciful,
Ink, Blink and Mustard, they rudely called him Percival,
They all sat laughing in the little red wagon
At the realio, trulio, cowardly dragon.
Belinda giggled till she shook the house,
And Blink said Week!, which is giggling for a mouse,
Ink and Mustard rudely asked his age,
When Custard cried for a nice safe cage.
Suddenly, suddenly they heard a nasty sound,
And Mustard growled, and they all looked around.
Meowch! cried Ink, and Ooh! cried Belinda,
For there was a pirate, climbing in the winda.
Pistol in his left hand, pistol in his right,
And he held in his teeth a cutlass bright,
His beard was black, one leg was wood;
It was clear that the pirate meant no good.
Belinda paled, and she cried, Help! Help!
But Mustard fled with a terrified yelp,
Ink trickled down to the bottom of the household,
And little mouse Blink strategically mouseholed.
But up jumped Custard, snorting like an engine,
Clashed his tail like irons in a dungeon,
With a clatter and a clank and a jangling squirm
He went at the pirate like a robin at a worm.
The pirate gaped at Belinda's dragon,
And gulped some grog from his pocket flagon,
He fired two bullets but they didn't hit,
And Custard gobbled him, every bit.
Belinda embraced him, Mustard licked him,
No one mourned for his pirate victim
Ink and Blink in glee did gyrate
Around the dragon that ate the pyrate.
Belinda still lives in her little white house,
With her little black kitten and her little gray mouse,
And her little yellow dog and her little red wagon,
And her realio, trulio, little pet dragon.
Belinda is as brave as a barrel full of bears,
And Ink and Blink chase lions down the stairs,
Mustard is as brave as a tiger in a rage,
But Custard keeps crying for a nice safe cage.
poem by Ogden Nash
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Ratbag (Fun Poem 109)
Ratbag was a pirate
whom sailed the seven seas
and the Spanish Main.
You won’t find his name in any history book,
as he wasn’t that good at being a pirate at all.
He was neither Long John Silver
nor Captain Henry Morgan.
His greatest claim to fame
was attempting to kidnap
a Polynesian Princess,
but feisty woman said,
“Ho, Ho, Oh no you don’t.”
Then promptly hit Ratbag
over the head with a coconut.
However, she was much better than
just conking him on the bonce
she ran off with his pirate ship
and his motley crew as well.
She left ole Ratbag stranded on an island
with the most ugliest women
the world has ever seen.
Ratbag got away from there,
and hitched a ride
on a passing brigantine home,
but the law caught up with him
said he must spend twenty years
in the penal colony at Cookaroo.
Then he was place on a farm
that raised kangaroos;
his job was to round them up
at the close of day.
Another thing he was not good at
as the Cookaroo’s kangaroos
beat him up every time he shouted.
Escaping from Cookaroo,
he became a highwayman
another job he wasn’t good at its sad to say.
The first coach he shouted stand and deliver to,
ran him into the ground.
Sadly, that led to his demise.
1 September 2009
Author Note:
The name Ratbag comes from a criminal who was once locked up in Newgate Prison. The rest of this tale was made up by the author who hopes it raised a smile.
poem by David Harris
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