I have no trouble with the twelve inches between my elbow and my palm. It's the seven inches between my ears that's bent.
quote by Tug McGraw
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Related quotes
Eliasamy
7 inches long,
But the minor came for it;
9 inches long,
And the major was satisfied by it;
But i am Eliasamy in the clouds of your love.
poem by Edward Kofi Louis
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What did I do in high school? I grew from 5 feet 4 inches to 6 feet 2 inches.
quote by Gregory Peck
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Inches Away
You came out of a dream,
and stood there before me,
inches away from the tips of my fingers. I
wanted to hold you,
but you were so near yet so far.
The impossible dream
that could never be.
The hurt in your eyes,
so evident to see.
Maybe one day
when the hurt goes away,
there maybe a chance.
We just have to wait and see,
and then you may not be
inches away from my fingertips.
poem by David Harris
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Interestingly, koi, when put in a fish bowl, will only grow up to three inches. When this same fish is placed in a large tank, it will grow to about nine inches long.
quote by Vince Poscente
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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When it comes to sex, the most important six inches are the ones between the ears.
quote by Ruth Westheimer
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Those Creams
Clotted and sour, whipped and double,
All delicious when laid on the tongue,
One could find oneself in deep trouble,
It's hard, keeping the figure young.
They melt with so much pleasure,
When you deem to taste their charm,
And if you're sampling them at leisure,
They can do you a lot of harm.
Inches creep onto your waistline,
And without warning, before very long,
Your poor body becomes less divine,
And your willpower, becomes less strong.
The flavoured ones, they are so yummy,
Nutty mixtures, with chocolate and fudge,
But they're no good at all for your tummy,
And will not help those inches to budge.
Those creams call out, waiting to tempt you,
And so you really just have to resist,
You should try out the 'Weight Watchers' menu,
Now then girls, do you follow the gist?
poem by Ernestine Northover
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Skatin On Thin Ice
(kinky friedman)
They say that even jesus hates a loser
And when you die you go to hockey hell
And when your soul gets sent down,
Therell be the devil skatin round
And an interview with howard cosell.
Well, some call him a jet-set gladiator,
Some say hes a soldier in a bloody silver war.
But hes one hell of a warrior
Hes got a good lawyer
And every time he crosses that line you can hear that garden roar.
And he keeps on skatin on thin ice
Just six inches from paradise
Livin on the ice, lovin on the run.
He keeps on skatin on thin ice
Just six inches from paradise,
Written in the stars, meltin in the sun.
Well, he scored again last night out in vancouver,
You might say that it was on a power play.
He come in close, he shut the light,
Before his teeth came out that night,
In the morning it was hell to break away.
Through northern lights and southern nights theres someone
Who warms your heart as you shiver from the cold.
But every gypsy, every lover, every dreamer must discover
What you win out on the ice, youre gonna lose out out on the road.
And he keeps on skatin on thin ice
Just six inches from paradise
Livin on the ice, lovin on the run.
He keeps skatin on thin ice
Just six inches from paradise
Written in the stars, boy, meltin in the sun.
Written in the stars, boy, meltin in the sun.
song performed by by Kinky Friedman
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Shirley
Your orange, green and black tape-measure
(In inches, of course)
Curls comfortably, as it always has,
On the table beside you;
And your needles click happily,
Lovingly working the wool together,
Knowing the human warmth they share
And create for another's body and being;
You are your knitting,
With your caring and love,
And your orange, green and black tape-measure
(In inches, of course)
poem by Roger Clark
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Ode to Tea
tea, it is best to taste
the new sprouts
fresh, tender, velvet
sacred inches of yellow green
that smile to the new day and
invite us with open arms
to be picked and savoured
sealed within each new leaf
are the glitter of health enhancing first light,
intellectual infusion of the moon
invigorating mountain air and
the subtle rejuvenating energy of dew
tea, inches of nature's best
blends in spirit with spring water
to shower us with a sparkling tonic
so that we too can be charming
and refreshing as young tea leaves
poem by John Tiong Chunghoo
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There's Snow In Olinda
The high road closed to traffic you can't drive that way
And in the high mountain village kids with snowballs play
And it snowed in Olinda four inches today
In the coldest part of Sherbrooke some venture to say.
Down through the high country the Winter winds blow
And though cold in Olinda it seldom does snow
Four inches a good fall though elders recall
That they can remember a much bigger fall.
It's been snowing in Olinda on the higher ground
Four inches this morning 'the word's got around'
The last kick of Winter and Spring is so near
But such is expected at this time of year.
There's snow in Olinda a wonderful sight
And the golf course and park is a blanket of white
And kids in the village are playing in the snow
And through the high country the Winter winds blow.
poem by Francis Duggan
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Distance In Miles Feb 27th,2011
I’m sorry but I never did forget inches, feet, yards and miles,
And I can’t forget Fahrenheit; replaced by Celsius denials,
I feel as though I’ve broken some rule or law and maybe I did,
I’m looking around for a sign that says, what I did was forbid.
I’m sure our Ottawa bureaucrats thought this change was great,
Dump the old inches and feet and miles and don’t have any debate,
Then our politically correct politicians all said yes,
I still think the numbers on my car speedometer are a mess.
I’ve not known the distance from Montreal to Toronto since then,
Nor the temperatures on TV though I hear them again and again,
Maybe I should see a psychiatrist to see what’s wrong with me,
How long has this being going on; maybe I need some vitamin B?
FEB 27TH,2011
poem by James Bredin
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How I wish to be LOVED
close as your fingers
are to each other
tall, thin, fat, or small
warm as your palm
as you squeeze me in
sincere as your heart
is to every pause of life
affectionate as your bossom
to a hungry suckling child
and intimate, intimate as your sweet lips
are on those esctatic inches of my life
poem by John Tiong Chunghoo
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Early Morning Snore
It starts of just before four am
with a put, put, put of an old Volkswagen,
and then descended into
a motorcycle engine on idle
with a tick-a-tick-a-tick
before revving up a notch
into an motorcycles engines roar.
Hence, my other half was at it again
with her early morning snore.
Like everyone, she denies that she ever snores.
Each morning like a regular alarm clock,
she starts her snoring engine
and I quickly vacate the bed,
it is my only escape to peace,
away from a motorcycle engine
roaring inches from my head.
One day I got out my portable Dictaphone
and started recording her,
when I played it back
she said I had recorded out in the street somewhere.
Now I am an early riser,
and who wouldn’t be
with a motorcycle engine roaring
just inches away from your ear.
12 December 2009
poem by David Harris
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They that die by famine die by inches.
quote by Matthew Henry
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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The Three Foot Rule
When I was bound apprentice, and learned to use my hands,
Folk never talked of measures that came from foreign lands:
Now I'm a British Workman, too old to go to school;
So whether the chisel or file I hold, I'll stick to my three-foot rule.
Some talk of millimetres, and some of kilogrammes,
And some of decilitres, to measure beer and drams;
But I'm a British Workman, too old to go to school,
So by pounds I'll eat, and by quarts I'll drink, and I'll work by my three-foot rule.
A party of astronomers went measuring the earth,
And forty million metres they took to be its girth;
Five hundred million inches, though, go through from pole to pole;
So let's stick to inches, feet and yards, and the good old three-foot rule.
poem by William John Macquorn Rankine
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If Johnny Only Had An Eight Inch Foot
I remember being in elementary school,
And on the very first day of fifth grade...
The teacher said to us,
'Always know this...
No question asked is a stupid one.'
We all looked at each other.
To then compete to ask,
Some of the most stupidest questions...
We could create she could not possibly answer.
Because we all lived in a low income project,
It was believed we were deprived of intelligence as well.
And we, then, as children...
Did not want to disappoint her expectations.
'If two shoes were on the wrong foot,
Would that be twelve or twenty-four inches missed...
If Johnny only had an eight inch foot? '
~I don't know.
Is there a Johnny in the classroom? ~
'No!
We only have Mikes and Bobs.'
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
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Baseball is a game of inches.
quote by Branch Rickey
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Evil comes to us by ells and goes away by inches.
I'm not overweight. I'm just nine inches too short.
quote by Shelley Winters
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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