Dissonance
The moon has cast its influence...
For all lunacy to abound--
A journey through your cranial matter...
Pounding out insanitys sound;
Your split persona has dominated---
Paranoia that is rife with spleen...
Ever so hard to digest your personal quest--
Difficult to grasp your outright mean! ;
Your 'delusions of personal reference'--
Seem to dominate your daily grind...
Revealing darkened edges of 'insanities poetic'--
The escort of the splitting mind;
Underneath The Umbrella
1974-2010
A poem about lack of keen eyesight
Mental illness and the inability to
Discern what is written about generally
And what is taken to be written about
Them...delusions of reference are
Often seen in strong paranoia...in
Schizophrenia and Bi-polar illness.
*Thought i had better clarify this
As there have been some whose
Paranoia or delusions took my writes
To be about them..
poem by Theodora Onken
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Related quotes
Paranoia Key Of E
How come you say you will and then you wont
You change your mind and then you say you dont
The mystery is why I play the goat
The mystery you call love
Sometimes youre like an eagle strong like a rock
Other times it seems you get unlocked
And all your worst fears come tumbling out
Into the street, into the snow
I remember when you had a dream
Everything was what it seemed to be
But now nightmares replace everything
And everything you see is wrong
You said wed meet but youre two hours late
You said you thought someone had picked your gate
So you hid and were afraid to wait
Seeing shadows in the snow
Seeing shadows in the snow
Now your friend godfrey is a perfect choice
One minute down next time rejoice, he seems -
- to have found the perfect voice
Paranoia key of e
Lets say everything he says is true
You love me but I cheat on you
And in my bedroom is a female zoo
Worse then clinton in prime time
I swear to you Im not with jill or joyce
Or cyd or sherry or darlene or worse
Im not kissing you while inside I curse
Paranoia key of e
Lets play a game the next time we meet, ah
Ill be the hands and you be the feet
And together we will keep the beat
To paranoia key of e
Now, you know manias in the key of b
Psychosis in the key of c
Lets hope that were not meant to be
In paranoia key of e
Anorexia is in g flat
And f is anything Ive left out
Dyslexia, kleptomania and vertigo
Patricide a, matricide d the same schizos
Paranoia key of e
Lets have a coda in the key of k
Something that only we can play
Maybe well light up like a hundred k
Paranoia out of key
Paranoia key of e
Paranoia key of e
Anorexia, dyslexia
Kleptomania, patricide a, matricide d, vertigo, schizos
Paranoia key of e, paranoia
Paranoia, paranoia, paranoia key of e
Paranoia, paranoia, paranoia key of e
song performed by by Lou Reed
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Destroyer
Met a girl called lola and I took her back to my place
Feelin guilty, feelin scared, hidden cameras everywhere
Stop! hold on. stay in control
Girl, I want you here with me
But Im really not as cool as Id like to be
cause theres a red, under my bed
And theres a little yellow man in my head
And theres a true blue inside of me
That keeps stoppin me, touchin ya, watchin ya, lovin ya
Paranoia, the destroyer.
Paranoia, the destroyer.
Well I fell asleep, then I woke feelin kinda queer
Lola looked at me and said, ooh you look so weird.
She said, man, theres really something wrong with you.
One day youre gonna self-destruct.
Youre up, youre down, I cant work you out
You get a good thing goin then you blow yourself out.
Silly boy ya self-destroyer. silly boy ya self-destroyer
Silly boy you got so much to live for
So much to aim for, so much to try for
You blowing it all with paranoia
Youre so insecure you self-destroyer
(and it goes like this, here it goes)
Paranoia, the destroyer
(here it goes again)
Paranoia, the destroyer
Dr. dr. help me please, I know youll understand
Theres a time device inside of me, Im a self-destructin man
Theres a red, under my bed
And theres a little green man in my head
And he said, youre not goin crazy, youre just a bit sad
cause theres a man in ya, knawin ya, tearin ya into two.
Silly boy ya self-destroyer.
Paranoia, the destroyer
Self-destroyer, wreck your health
Destroy friends, destroy yourself
The time device of self-destruction
Light the fuse and start eruption
(yea, it goes like this, here it goes)
Paranoia, the destroyer
(heres to paranoia)
Paranoia, the destroyer
(hey hey, here it goes)
Paranoia, the destroyer
(and it goes like this)
Paranoia, the destroyer
(and it goes like this.)
song performed by by Kinks
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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High Times
Written by jay kay, toby smith, stuart zender and derrick mckenzie
You dont need your name in bright lights
Youre a rock star
And some thin foil with a glass pipe
Is your guitar, now yes it is
Little angela suffers delusions
From these high times
Shes been cleaning up,
Since she was fourteen
On the main line
And her hunky funky junky,
Of a boyfriend
Got her on late nights
With her skirt tight
Woah shes a wild thing, letting it all swing
God bless our high times
Dont you know that last night
Turned to daylight
And a minute became a day
Last night
All my troubles
Well they seemed so, so far away
Searching my reflection
For a glimpse of, an other me
Ive got to get away from these high times
All these high high times
Cause these hight times
Are killing me
Now high times go on
And on and on
High times rock your mind yeah
This twisted crystal kingdom
Where you live your nine lives
And your head spins
With purple cyclones made of dexadrine
And when the phone rings
You think bad things
Well these are high high
High high times yeah
In any backstreet when you take a hot seat
Make sure you check your flight times
Oh now mama
Dont you know that last night
Turned to daylight
And a minute became a day
Last night
All my troubles
Well they seemed so, so far away
Searching my reflection
For a glimpse of, an other me
Ive got to get away from these high times
All these high high times
Cause these hight times
Are killing me
Now drop it this time
Paranoia will destroy ya
Paranoia will destroy ya
Paranoia will destroy ya
Paranoia
Paranoia
Dont you know that last night
Turned to daylight
And a minute became a day
Last night
All my troubles
Well they seemed so, so far away
Searching my reflection
For a glimpse of, an other me
Ive got to get away from these high times
All these high high times
Cause these hight times
Are killing me
La la la la la
High times (oh yeah)
Were living in high high high times yeah
song performed by by Jamiroquai
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Acute Schizophrenia Paranoia Blues
Im too terrified to walk out of my own front door,
Theyre demonstrating outside I think theyre gonna start the third world war,
Ive been to my local head shrinker,
To help classify my disease,
He said its one of the cases of acute schizophrenia he sees.
Well the milkmans a spy, and the grocer keeps on following me,
And the woman next doors an undercover for the k.g.b.,
And the man from the social security
Keeps on invading my privacy,
Oh there aint no cure for acute schizophrenia disease.
Ive got acute schizophrenia paranoia too,
Schizophrenia, schizophrenia,
Ive got it, youve got it, we cant lose,
Acute schizophrenia blues.
Im lost on the river, the river of no return,
I cant make decisions, I dont know which way Im gonna turn,
Even my old dad, lost some of the best friends he ever had,
Apparently, his was a case of acute schizophrenia too.
I got acute schizophrenia paranoia too,
Schizophrenia, schizophrenia,
Ive got it, youve got it, we cant lose,
Acute schizophrenia blues,
Theyre watching my house and theyre tapping my telephone,
I cant trust nobody, but Im much too scared to be on my own
And the income tax collectors got his beady eye on me,
Oh there aint no cure for acute schizophrenia disease.
No there aint no cure for
Schizophrenia disease.
song performed by by Kinks
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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I think paranoia can be instructive in the right doses. Paranoia is a skill.
quote by John Shirley
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Paranoia is an illness I contracted in institutions. It is not the reason for my sentences to reform school and prison. It is the effect, not the cause.
quote by Jack Henry Abbott
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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A Poem Which Makes No Reference To Poetry
A POEM WHICH MAKES NO REFERENCE TO POETRY
A poem which makes no reference to poetry
And does not wonder who and what the poet is-
A poem that makes meanings of life outside the world of its own self- reflection-
A poem that is what life is
In some far and different way-
That poem
Waiting elsewhere
Written by someone else
So great in its beauty
And so powerful in its light
That poem written by someone else
About something I know nothing about
In a way I never dreamed or imagined
That poem is not written by me
And never will be.
poem by Shalom Freedman
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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This Is Going To Be A Long Ride
My observations are never premeditated.
With a plan to only accept that which I believe.
I experience a witnessing,
As a student willing to learn.
I take notes whether mental or written.
And free myself from regurgitating quotes,
To whisper into ears to then leave.
I'm not like that.
What I describe is viewed with my eyes.
And what I hear is seldom my own sentiments.
Although when I see something that should be clear,
But to others it is not as it appears...
I wonder when my delusions have ended.
And how many conscious aren't aware when they start.
I'm not like that either.
Could we all be confused,
And refuse to accept we've been abused and neglected...
By our own delusions?
Could we all be wishing what we witness isn't what it is.
To admit what is does exist without the benefit of our wishes?
Could my observations perceived as not being premeditated,
Be, in fact, a comforting of a trap...
My mind extends to enhance my comprehension?
Or...
Could I just be needing rest and have yet to confess,
I can use as much of it as I can get?
'Yes! '
I'm sorry.
I am having a personal self assessment.
Am I disturbing you?
'Yes.
I am hoping your 'self-assessment'...
Soon ends as to not to further prolong,
My 'already' too long bus ride.
But who knows...
Maybe I am confused AND deluded! '
I apologize.
I didn't realize I was speaking that loudly.
'No problem.
I do the same thing myself.
At home.
Alone.
When I'm seeking an intelligent conversation.'
Oh.
I agree with you.
This is going to be a long ride.
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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We Your Dearest Friends
We, your dearest friends
Are having dinner without you
We're witty and we use it to be vicious
In just another minute
We'll laughing about you
To the untrained eye
It wouldn't look suspicious
We, your dearest friends
Don't really care if you have needs
Your hopes and dreams
Are trivial by your standards
We make fun of how you sing
And then we imitate your speech
And the stupid things
You say we like to slander
But we won't reel you out too far
'Cause after all, we need you for
Our ongoing quest
We've bonded here in faithlessness
To undermine your happiness
Toying with your paranoia
Everything you do annoys us
It annoys us
We remember how
You bought us all those gifts
You liked to make us think
You were so generous
Be careful in the future
Of everything you say and do
'Cause it can and will be used
Against you by us
We your dearest friends
Judge you "guilty
Here and now
Of thinking you're a star
When it's all over
Nobody wants you
And we the least of all
It's been a long time since
You had those famous lovers
But we won't reel you out too far
'Cause after all, we need you for
Our ongoing quest
We've bonded here
In faithlessness
To undermine your happiness
Toying with your paranoia
Everything you do annoys us
(it annoys the hell out of us)
It's not the straw
No, it's the final straw you'll say
Finally you've grown a sturdy backbone
There'll be no invitation to
Your rocky coast this year
Your queenly voice will
Ice us down the telephone
You'll never guess who's joining us
For brandy later on
That's right, it's your bete noir from hell
That's who
Are you worried we might spill the beans
Are you worried we might tell
About your little visit to the bin when
you were cuckoo?
But we won't reel you out too far
'Cause after all, we need you for
Our ongoing quest
We've bonded here in faithlessness
To undermine your happiness
Toying with your paranoia
Everything you do annoys us
It annoys us
Toying with your paranoia
You have an unforgiveable personality
Unforgettable, yes
We were so happy once in the Garden of
the Finzi-Continis
Oh, yes we were
Never more, never more
Here comes the waiter
We'll just put it on your house charge
You'll never know the difference
Never notice
song performed by by Carly Simon
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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I Am Not Your (Capital) 'Y'! ! !
Sick is sick! ! !
And plans are plans
Laying here in the warmth of my husband
Trying very hard to understand! ! !
Where do you come off, anyway?
Your schemes-delusions of a manic mind!
I love my husband in bed and out...
Do you need it-any better defined? !
And if i wasn't married
I wouldn't be looking for someone rude & crude
Besides, know about your devious plans
W & B and you know-the whole darn crew! ! !
So 'Y' not just dropp the 'Y'?
Because it does not represent me! ! !
Have no interest in manic-criminal pornographers
Is that so difficult to see?
Your mental illness and greed has taken its toll
You make me and my heart so very sick
You and your groups con games are the lowest of the low! ! ! !
Do not understand what makes you all tick!
I'm leaving you with these words-
I wear my ring because of the real love my husband & i share
What may have been on pause for a mere moment-
Is on full and filled to the brim with tender loving care! ! !
May i recommend you read a previous poem:
(((Damage Control))) (From his mouth to God's ears)
poem by Theodora Onken
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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I Hate Schizophrenia
I hate schizophrenia-
Spending months in a locked ward,
Pacing up and down low piled carpeted halls
Between therapy groups, and those nothing to do weekends.
Oh, how I hate schizophrenia.
I hate having schizophrenia,
Having to take at least seven medications
To get me through the day, and to take Ativan
To assure me a normal night’s sleep.
I hate having schizophrenia.
I hate this illness I have called schizophrenia.
Taking the Seroquel and Abilfy that make me ravenous so
I feel that I must spend the day vigorously exercising to
Keep my weight at a normal range, and to live on rabbit food.
How I hate this illness called schizophrenia.
I hate my terrible illness, schizophrenia.
If I don’t take multiple medications,
I hallucinate, get paranoid and delusional,
Have sleepless nights after nights, and
I have no motivation.
I have schizophrenia and how angry it makes me feel.
Nurses, so called friends and therapists half my age
Treat me as if I were a child.
I am ill so I cannot be trusted.
I have schizophrenia and how angry it makes me feel.
I hate schizophrenia.
It is an illness that has a stigma attached to it, and
It has a grip on me.
It impairs my functioning and
It mars my relationships.
I hate schizophrenia.
I despise and resent having this terrible illness.
All of my relatives are well adjusted and highly functional.
I was born the black sheep; Why am I this way?
It’s so unfair!
When I think of it tears stream down my face.
I must have removed my glasses a hundred times today to
Wipe the tears away, yet
They keep on flowing.
I despise and resent having this terrible illness.
I don’t like being diagnosed with schizophrenia.
Even in the darkness of the night on heavy medications
Voices haunt me.
I just want people to leave me alone.
I want to run away from the world and
Escape to a world of my own.
I don’t like being diagnosed with schizophrenia.
My name is not “schizophrenia”.
It is the name of this illness I was cursed with.
I am so angry now I could scream and hit the walls.
But the staff would come and grab me and throw me in seclusion, if I did.
Yes, that empty room with a hard mattress in a corner on the floor.
I could destroy myself.
I suppose all of us who have schizophrenia feel this way sometimes.
I suppose what upsets me the most is what
People say about me:
“She is schizophrenic.”
I am not “schizophrenic.”
I am a human being, flesh and blood with an illness.
I am a person, NOT an illness.
It is a constant struggle for all of us who have schizophrenia, to
Be a label, not a person.
That is the biggest problem with people in this world.
They label us, who are ill,
They don’t see us as just people.
And people we are, inside and out, not diseases.
poem by Claudia Krizay
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Imagine a thousand more such daily intrusions in your life, every hour and minute of every day, and you can grasp the source of this paranoia, this anger that could consume me at any moment if I lost control.
quote by Jack Henry Abbott
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Brimming to the Rim In Denial
Brimming to the rim in denial.
Putting truth on trial.
But none of this rhetoric,
Escapes observations...
That can not be erased,
As seen.
No matter who declares,
What 'is' or is not obscene.
Truth is not another version of deceit.
To be interpreted to inspire a life of delusions.
And delusions have never strengthened reality!
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
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Gunshot Glitter
Dont you wanna let go of your heart
Or you resist the beds of bliss
Fortune makes fools of us all
My dear materialista, silence was insane,
The parting was mutual.
Dont you want the rocket to rock out?
Theres room for us both to fly.
Tell the man Im never coming back again.
Tell the man Im never coming back again.
Why should you notice at all?
Gone again beside you will fall
Down to the sea out of the skies
Of gold cards and casual tears
I have only come to see you shine
Feminine smiles the right side is wise, more than i.
I wanna be your lover,
Lipstick my name across your mirror.
Blood red with flaked gunshot glitter
And be one with all you disowned in your young life.
You paranoia politician diva.
You paranoia politician diva.
Will you let go of your heart,
Left behind a hypnotizing swirl
The semis left behind.
Dont you want to rocket to rock?
Theres room for both of us to fly
Same show everyday, dont have to blow up in the sky.
So I just came from hicks town,
Left my coins behind
Maybe some poor cloths pony will himself a life
Why should you care if I crash your affair?
Why should you notice me? I really wanna see you shine.
I wanna be your lover,
Lipstick my name across your mirror.
Now, be one with all you disown,
True love has come to us all.
Blinded by the flame, right side smiles,
Organized male, love, my silence was insane.
The parting was mutual the moment I became
A paranoia politician
Diva
A paranoia politician diva
A paranoia politician diva
A paranoia politician diva
Diva, diva, diva
song performed by by Jeff Buckley
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Down the road of play.
We`ve all run along
Down this road of play
Today,
All to say.
There`s nothing there.
Old ghosts of no repair.
The illness is over
The soothsayer said the teddybear
Is told to stand and stare.
There`s nothing there
It`s fair to say.
It was a while ago
You told me so.
There`s nothing there.
Just old paranoia,
Circle in a square.
There`s nothing there.
What`s to compare.
Fools on a roundabout square.
Horses going up n` down,
Waiting for the clown
To dare say nothing at all,
Or is there?
poem by Peter Vealey
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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In The Night You Wander
In the night you wander around
Alone in your house.
Everyone has described you,
You recall your childhood as one baby,
Dancing around, by yourself, being twenty.
You amble up and down the stairs,
In undying love for your life story.
Now it has reached mealtime,
Lose the food of the poor,
Keep beans, artichokes and wine,
Beautifying the taste of mealtimes.
What else can you say?
I'm thinking of the times you sat beside me
Making delusions, the usual delusions.
This time was small in confusion,
The thoughts kept moving and prodding,
And the delusions kept coming.
You lost them at the end of the day.
A mirage appears after seconds,
We found the life story,
A journey to the other side.
I'm thinking of you, with undying love,
You're my friend of course.
poem by Naveed Akram
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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How slowly the days creep by
Maybe for a time I have been dead
and are living in someone else’s dream
or illness paranoia in this silent existence,
where I cannot any more make love or find it
as if I am already in the realm of death
and too slowly time continues to creep by
as if every thing has come to a deadly halt.
To nowhere I can turn
and daily I am wondering
about the reason of my existence
and the purpose of everything
and nowhere there is hope
that can let the darkness around me
pass a little quicker
while I am haunted.
Or maybe there are gods that are voluptuous,
that have got to beg nymphs
for their sexual favours
while I am lost in my madness
and do not write great words anymore
and they are now visiting other places
rather than my poems
as if something in me, maybe something intangible
wards them off from me and are refusing them
and they echo their mighty words
out at other places
and their roaring and jollification resounds around me
while they have pleasure and are enjoying themselves
to which I can only yearn
and in this hell I have to stay shackled.
Now lock your hands around me
as if nothing can every loosen them
and let your lips find mine
and bind us in sensual passion
that when death’s fingers grab for me
I for a last time
hear your heart beat
and you surround me for a last time lovingly.
[Reference: Wie langsam kriechet sie dahin by Heinrich Heine.]
poem by Gert Strydom
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How slowly the days creep by [1]
Maybe for a time I have been dead
and are living in someone else’s dream
or illness paranoia in this silent existence,
where I cannot any more make love or find it
as if I am already in the realm of death
and too slowly time continues to creep by
as if every thing has come to a deadly halt.
To nowhere I can turn
and daily I am wondering
about the reason of my existence
and the purpose of everything
and nowhere there is hope
that can let the darkness around me
pass a little quicker
while I am haunted.
Or maybe there are gods that are voluptuous,
that have got to beg nymphs
for their sexual favours
while I am lost in my madness
and do not write great words anymore
and they are now visiting other places
rather than my poems
as if something in me, maybe something intangible
wards them off from me and are refusing them
and they echo their mighty words
out at other places
and their roaring and jollification resounds around me
while they have pleasure and are enjoying themselves
to which I can only yearn
and in this hell I have to stay shackled.
Now lock your hands around me
as if nothing can every loosen them
and let your lips find mine
and bind us in sensual passion
that when death’s fingers grab for me
I for a last time
hear your heart beat
and you surround me for a last time lovingly.
[Reference: Wie langsam kriechet sie dahin by Heinrich Heine.]
poem by Gert Strydom
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Mind Grinder
I'll take a side order of paranoia,
This morning.
I'll take some hash browns...
Fresh hashed from the fields.
Spread that toast with more tension
And pour me another cup of grief!
'Is the mind grinder in? '
We need to have more cocktails
Of poison passed.
Is the mind grinder in?
He's got more sessions...
Those last confessions were bought.
They believe him...
And his twisted way of making it alright.'
Do I need another dose of 'I told you so? '
Even though I feel full of substituted truth
Many seem to be craving with diets of coke!
And that's the joke!
Toking up in puffs of smoke.
'Weed please.
Rolled fine! '
The mind grinder can crank this whine into sorrow.
Making fear too high a price to pay to allow simple peace.
The mind grinder can crank up cruel pictures of life...
Insuring the future will be deep in doom and torment!
Do I need another dose of 'I told you so? '
Do you need another way to be told
How to forget who you are?
Do you need another way to plant fear in your soul.
What has happened to that bold stance for justice?
I'll take a side order of paranoia this morning!
I heard it was the rage.
I'll take a side order of paranoia this morning!
Why should I be the one left not crazed?
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
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Through My Ardent Prayers
With a discipline kept in practice.
And assisted through my ardent prayers.
I am there within a mental seclusion.
I am there aware and devoted...
Feeling blessed each day!
Although I am tested to accept,
And manifest delusions.
My best is tempted to slide at times.
When my mind becomes bombarded,
With teases I taste.
Most times easy to find.
I admit it can be difficult,
To break away from my human lusts.
But a faith I maintain...
To help me refrain from such temptations.
And I grow to trust,
That I can and must endure.
As long as I know my quest made is pure...
From doubt and confusion,
Induced with desires I can refuse to embrace.
I can face darkened shadows.
And replace the clouds with Sun to shine.
It is through my ardent prayers,
I dare to strengthen on my journey.
In a haste not wasted on yearnings...
To undo mistakes I can make sometimes.
But learn I do with each step I take,
I can choose whatever it is I wish.
And I wish to be free to be me...
Unafraid,
To expose my imperfections.
Or show I can heal,
From blemishes revealed.
It is through my ardent prayers,
I dare to strengthen on my journey.
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
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