Family Dynamics And War
Family Dynamics and War
They both saw their faces reflected in each others tears
as they dismantled the love they once knew in angry words and fears.
Their embittered regrets stood crucified along the highway of
their misunderstandings and manipulated meanings.
Their bad habits had the taint of addiction and habit, of rote reactions,
of-ice pick-in-the-eyeball harms and afflictions;
and yet:
they seldom resolved or settled issues;
instead settling for desultory, bitter truces and family feuds and family wars;
settled for steely silences,
sex and affection wars,
pitting friends against friends,
family members against family members.
They conducted secret alliances,
forced people to take sides,
seeking to put themselves in the right at all times
and each other in the wrong,
forcing kids,
neighbors,
and even mere acquaintances
into a "You are on my side or you are on their side" choice of right or wrong
And yet:
each secretly wondered why the love had shriveled
until there was only a naked drive
toward being right,
toward wanting to control and manipulate,
toward the murder of all soft feelings,
of the loss of the ability to be truthful,
of ever admitting having wronged the other
of the ability to be humble,
of incessantly seeking power over
and the utter humiliation of the other,
of gradually being blind to that was once my husband,
was my wife, my friend, my neighbor, my kids;
And yet:
worse and worse it got
until it spilled further and further out
among school acquaintances,
among friendship circles,
out among the neighborhood and churches
into small town after small town
until attitudes solidified
into the false belief
that this was the way the world was;
surrounding themselves with others similarly afflicted
who were the same
where False Truth seemed to be true everywhere
in all the relationships they sought
out others
others who had similar histories
and prejudices
and the dynamic grew
all these alikes clung together
reinforcing their illusions among themselves
and others
ejecting all others who which did not participate in
the warped view
keeping only those who needed to maintain the false vision
to keep themselves safe from Truth
a warped view which needs constant feeding
needs constant reassurance
that what they were doing to
and with others
was not destructive
was a-ok
shielding them from any notion that destroying self
family and others was totally unjustified and destructive
because True Truth needs to be defended against
because in time it will overcome Untruth every time;
because a mere glimmer of Truth
will cause a collapse of the individual psyche,
of entire groups
of whole societies
and that would be emotional chaos
be too much self revelation.
So they continued to ruin themselves and others with behavior that was deadly,
continued to build the belief
that those harmed by them deserved to be harmed
deserved to be disciplined at their hands,
that those who disagreed with them were
enemies;
that that who disagreed or sought to pull the veil from their eyes
were trying to destroy them
and must be stopped at all costs;
Now the view shifted until there are whole groups now
which fell into the hated categories,
the view evolved to the belief that that there were only two kinds of people in the world,
those like us and those not like us
and those not like us
must be stopped at all costs.
That we must launch a preemptive war
against them
before it is too late
before they come to kill all of us.
poem by Lonnie Hicks
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Related quotes
just how right I am
I just can’t understand
how it is that
the world can’t understand
how right I am
and how wrong it is
OK, we’ll excuse the world, for the moment,
since it is far removed from my person
and my mind
so it can’t really be expected to understand my
unfailing rightness:
just how right I am and how just I am;
but the family, my family –
no, not the family of man
but the damned family of mine, my blood and bones and skin –
I can’t understand for the world of me
why my own family
that eats at the table with me
can’t understand
how right I am
and wrong they are…
just how right I am
and how just I am…
Look, I can understand about the world
but I just can’t understand
how the family….
I mean, this is where the family is important
for if the family can give me
just a little support –
just a teeny-weeny bit – I mean how much
does it take
for the family to see
how right I am
and how wrong the family is.
Is that really asking for too much?
You see, I’m sure you can see,
if only the family could agree
the world itself would see
how right I am…
But what is to be done?
prophets are never accepted
in their own home
and so in their own family too…
and so perhaps the truth lies in this cliché…
still, if one looks at it clearly,
I just can’t understand
how it is that
the world, which includes that silly family of mine,
can’t understand
how right I am
and how wrong it is
poem by Raj Arumugam
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Family
When its family, you forgive them for they know not what they do
When its family, you accept them, cause you have no choice but to
When its family, theyre a mirror of the worst and best in you
And they always put you to the test
And you always try to do your best
And just pray for God to do the rest, when its family
Some are preachers, some are gay
Some are addicts, drunks and strays
But not a one is turned away, when its family
Some are lucky, others aint
Some are fighters, others faint
Winners, losers, sinners, saints, its all family
And when its family you trust them and your hearts an open door
When its family, you tolerate what youd kill others for
When its family, you love and hate and take, then give some more
Somehow you justify mistakes, try to find some better way
To solve the problems day to day, in the family
You take the trouble as it comes and love them more than anyone
Good or bad or indifferent, its still family
You choose your lovers, you pick your friends
Not the family that youre in, nah
Theyll be with you til the end, cause its family
And when its family, you forgive them for they know not what they do
When its family, theyre a mirror of the worst and best in you
When its family, when its family
Let me be all that I should be to the family
song performed by by Dolly Parton
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Why Can't We Be A Family
why can't family be family again
we used to always be friends
we used to huddle together
whenever we got scared
we felt the warmth in one anothers arms
because we knew the love was there
we used to build forts out of whatever we had in our rooms
and wage sars
throwing pillows, books, and brooms
we used to have mini mosh pits
with just the four of us
we headbanged and pushed
we screamed and pretended to cuss
we used to protect eachother
we used to defend one another
we used to stand together like brothers and sister
when mom punished us we would all resist her
we used to be a family
a family that would always care
we used to be a family with more happiness than despair
we used to be a family that never hogged food or air
we used to be a family that told eachother we were there
we used to be a family
a family that sat down toghether and ate
we used to be a family full of our own ideas that we create
we used to be a family that got along without debate
we used to be a family with more love than hate
so why can't family be family again
and remember why those times were so good
why can't family be family again
and treat eachother the way we should
why can't family be family again
and throw the hate away
why can't family be family again
and invite the love to stay
poem by Ricky Baker
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Why Can't Family Be Family Again
why can't family be family again
we used to always be friends
we used to huddle together
whenever we got scared
we felt the warmth in one anothers arms
because we knew the love was there
we used to build forts out of whatever we had in our rooms
and wage sars
throwing pillows, books, and brooms
we used to have mini mosh pits
with just the four of us
we headbanged and pushed
we screamed and pretended to cuss
we used to protect eachother
we used to defend one another
we used to stand together like brothers and sister
when mom punished us we would all resist her
we used to be a family
a family that would always care
we used to be a family with more happiness than despair
we used to be a family that never hogged food or air
we used to be a family that told eachother we were there
we used to be a family
a family that sat down toghether and ate
we used to be a family full of our own ideas that we create
we used to be a family that got along without debate
we used to be a family with more love than hate
so why can't family be family again
and remember why those times were so good
why can't family be family again
and treat eachother the way we should
why can't family be family again
and throw the hate away
why can't family be family again
and invite the love to stay
poem by Marco Jimenez
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A Letter From Baby, To Guzel (an excerpt from current somniations...)
Guzel,
You have pointed to MY actions as destructive; MY actions were just REACTIONS to YOUR actions; You deceived everyone BECAUSE you were scared, which pushed you away from the 'love of your life'-ME! MY actions are, and have only ever been bourne out of selfless love and and a boundless concern for you; YOUR actions, ON THAT day were the destructive actions; THEY are the only thing that caused all of what followed, for the brief time that both of us were NOT ourselves.
WHY would you destroy something so beautiful, because you are scared? All you needed to do was, say: 'Moe, I am scared! '-to which I would have replied something like: 'OK, no problem-the solution is to slow down and reassess, to ensure you are NOT scared again.' MAYBE THAT is what you should have, and what I would have, done! YOUR actions since that day tell me and the world, that you WANT to fix what YOU broke; namely, NOW, due YOUR actions, EVERYONE with a 'need to know' of MY past does (ALL AT ONCE) and THAT is dead, and? ? ? s they may have NOW, are for me and ME alone; YOUR burden is done my beloved!
I need YOU to understand that though you effectively betrayed me, as well as yourself by NOT being wholly honest about how you REALLY feel, I AM NOT angry, I understand completely NOW why you did what you did, and when and how you did it! I know more than anyone WHY! ! I know more about you than perhaps anyone else in the world, perhaps even YOU! YOU were NOT ready to come here, consort with BOTH our families under the BURDEN of YOUR secret about what HAPPENED to ME! ! I understand, not only because I love you, but because I am pretty insightful as well!
As time marches from that tragic day just before Christmas, the truth, the REAL TRUTH settles and the deceit as well as my 'baggage' fades; Speaking of such-both your past and mine have only strengthened us, they are NOT burdens for each, they are NOT cloaks behind which to hide-they ARE ways that we have learned lessons and gained much strength!
GOD and YOU and alone control both your own destiny, as well as how others view you and those you love most ardently-people are capable of much love, as you well know, through me, as well as others. YOUR friends and family effectively were MORE ambushed MORE than I, BY YOU! But again, the damage has been done, the coast is now clear and the 'drama' is gone. NOW, I only possess a 'sordid' past which includes an 'ex-wife' and TWO beautifully inspiring Daughters. JUST THE WAY YOU LIKE IT! ! (*as you said to me 8 January 2012*) . I HAVE NEVER seen WHAT I know about YOU as baggage, but as PROOF of your strength-now show the world how strong you really are!
Stop running FROM your love and TOWARD YOUR fear, reverse the course, er, curse and come back to friendship, then perhaps love at YOUR speed, it IS real, it IS true and YOU are LOVED!
-Baby
poem by Maurice Harris
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Family I love
love my family with my hold heart.
My love is Joy to love my family
Family is sad and happy and love.
Family is fun and painful and pretty.
My family is like all families we have
love and we have happiness and tears
I love my hold family
My family is like angels who fly in sky
I am grateful that I have family that loves
me.
My family are kind and nice and fun to be
around
My family is painful like all familys are and
heart breaking and Evil sometimes
My family is heart breaking and deadly like
everyone else
Hey I can't stop loving my family not matter what
it coats in the family.
Way my family is just makes me want have family
with someone be as good as they are.
But God know I love my family
and our love is great to have in life
and even know they leave he world they still
a live in my hearts.
poem by Kristina Riggs
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Family vs. Friends
Friends come in your life as ocean waves come and go.
You friends may be there one day and be gone the next.
Family is like blood, you need it to survive and it will always be there.
Family is there the day you are born and will be until the day you die.
Friends may be there for the short term, it is your family that will
remain by your side.
Always put your family first, friends should go second.
Family will be there to support you and catch you when you fall.
Friends may be good to talk to when you are feeling down,
but they might not be there when you need someone the most.
Family will be there to laugh and they will be there to cry.
Family will be there through the good and bad.
Family is always there.
poem by Nina Grobe
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The One They Never Mention
They say Love lasts forever,
That Family sticks together.
But they never say one thing,
About Friendship.
They never mention when you discover,
Love doesn't last forever,
Family doesn't always stick together,
Without Friendship you'll snap, like a dried up twig.
They pick you up, when you fall,
They hold you, when you cry,
But next to Love and Family,
No one pays attention to Friends.
Next time listen when they say,
"Love lasts forever, and Family sticks together."
And don't forget to add,
"And Friends are always there."
poem by Rachel Mac
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Family Possession
In your own world,
the world who don't know,
what its mean,
what its theme,
The way you think,
the way you look,
at a family member,
no one know,
what its thinking about.
Your mind should think positive,
pray to God it won't oppose.
No one in your family,
no one as your friends,
not even yourself,
knows that you in love with someone,
in your family tree,
more than just a family.
The way you're obsessed,
the way you empress,
on a family member,
that you're deeply in love with,
will lead you to emotional choas,
and confusion on that person,
and other family members,
who starts to realize.
Your wife will leave you,
in suffering passion,
leaving you as she,
sees you in a shameful matter.
Shame on you,
for exporting your love to someone else,
shame on you,
for not giving your attention to your wife,
shame on you,
for using incest movement.
The more you're obsessive,
the more worst it gets,
the more passion will suffer,
as your wife,
leaves you.
poem by Mathew Cruz
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This is not a family
This is not a family...
No not to me... a family is people who are there for you they are the people that you trust to make sure your okay they are the people that believe in you and they are the people who will never lie to you and always be honest
This is not a family...
For a family its pretty sad to think we treat one another as nothing talk to eachother as if we dont care for one another and backstab and walk on one another because we can
This is not a family...
I use to think i had it good till i grew up and relized family shouldnt bring eachother down... family shouldnt make you cry... family shouldnt make you think you will be nothing and stay nothing for....
This is not a family...
Instead its just a sad excuse of people who put up with eachother not because they want to but because they have to... for this family that i have i hope that all of you will soon relize before its too late that i love my family... and i believe in my family... and that even though my household is not right at all... i know that i will become something... not because you make me think i cant... its because i believe in myself and with that i know i will someday do great things...
FOR this is not a family...
but it is my family
poem by Andrea Thanasas
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Family talk
The world is our home
The cosmos is our family
We should keep the secret
Within the family.
Here is our family
There is love there is hate
There is lust there is vengeance
There is jealousy there is greed
There is loyalty there is betrayal.
We are all here in the family
In this family no body is
Taking birth nobody is dying
And all are constant and eternal.
The world is our home
Our family and it is ours.
poem by Gajanan Mishra
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Twos and Threes
Relationships live or die
from the Threes and Twos;
You and I
may love our best;
your needs
my needs
may meld or clash;
but as long as we're
the Twos
we will fail;
and the relationship
will delve down the deeps.
Yours vs. Mine
Right vs. Wrong
Your Family,
My Family,
Your View
My View,
Your Needs,
My Needs:
stuck in the Twos.
The Three is You and I
and understanding that
there is another person
in the relationship;
The US.
Then we see
that sometimes we have to
value US
more than
than You and Me.
What shall prevail:
the irritation over
the tooth paste tube,
the unmade bed
the chores or we Three?
Is Happiness
the sacrifice
for Three
we learn to make?
Yes it is.
The Three
you me and the kids
Us and our family
not versus,
but additions to
the love
we want to add to our lives.
The Three comprehends
that all belong in this tapestry.
No outsiders here.
No insiders either.
Nations too,
practice Two:
Us vs. Them
Good vs Bad
Foreigners vs Us
God with Us and
not with Them.
Civilizations thrive or die
by the Threes and Twos.
So do We.
So practice
Three
not Two;
You might
be
happier.
But then again
that is just my view.
poem by Lonnie Hicks
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Family First
Friends may come and friends may go
Family is first and this I know
Putting friends first is a mistake
And not one that you should make
Family’s forever and this I know
Friends enter your life and then they go
Making friends is fun trust me with this
But not something you would miss
Love your family while they are here
Keep their love very near
Family can leave the world at any time
So don’t make yourself feel like slime
Family is here to comfort you
I know your friends do this too
Without your family you would be lost
Hold on to them no matter the cost
poem by Bonnie B Long
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Family first
Friends may come and friends may go
Family is first and this I know
Putting friends first is a mistake
And not one that you should make
Family’s forever and this I know
Friends enter your life and then they go
Making friends is fun trust me with this
But not something you would miss
Love your family while they are here
Keep their love very near
Family can leave the world at any time
So don’t make yourself feel like slime
Family is here to comfort you
I know your friends do this too
Without your family you would be lost
Hold on to them no matter the cost
poem by Cheyanne Whien
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Keeping email alive in touch
Keeping email alive in touch
A day gone by without your mail
I seem to be a year for me
Today I read your mail
Is full with gladness and happiness
Family and friends
Getting in touch
From around the world
I dream of the day, when we meet
Or again
In real from around the world
I will tell you, how much I love you
My family and your Friendship
When we do we spend all day long
Talking of this
Miracle email alive
Only we can make this happen
Because we been waiting for this moment
For a long time
I been waiting to meet you all
Or again
I miss you all
And to be my true friends
That you donâ? ? t know yet
When we meet each other
You agree my family and friends
When I read your mail
From the most beautiful family and friends
I have with you all
It is so pleasant to understand
I want you to know
You are the most loving
Family and friends
I want to feel your peasant
Completely our friendship
I truly love to have family and friends
Like you all
To all my beloved family and friends
Are important to me
Life in touch will never stop
Whatever weather
Keeping email alive in touch
The more successful is filled with common sense
poem by See Fee Lee
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To Me What Family is
Family to me has many meanings
For all are full of diverse feelings
Love and anger, both within a single one
Children who stay and children who run
Can one family be better than another?
It all depends on how they love each other
A family’s love should last forever
Bonds of love nothing can sever
For the family I have, I am happy and blessed
And nothing more truthful have I ever confessed
Family has many meanings, but one rises above
The greatest meaning of family, is that of love
poem by Glaedr the poet
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Cretin Family
I am not so upset about my horrible self
But why don't you go upset yourself
Hey here's the mirror see your stupid face
What a disgrace man and you know it's true
Cretin family Cretin family Cretin family
Everyone's against me
Cretin family Cretin family Cretin family
Oi-oi-oi-oi
Don't stare at me it's freakin' me out
Look what's happening now it's all your fault
You can't do nothin' absolutely nothing' o.k.
Why don't you get a hoola hoop
and do the cretin hop and
Cretin family Cretin family Cretin family
Everyone's against me
Cretin family Cretin family Cretin family
Oi-oi-oi-oi
I am never wrong don't tell me what to do
Here's a little curse it's from me to you
It's nothin' gonna happen nothin' ever will
You'll be miserable every day your luck will always be bad
Cretin family Cretin family Cretin family
Everyone's against me
Cretin family Cretin family Cretin family
Oi-oi-oi-oi
Everyone's against me
Oi-oi-oi-oi
Everyone's against me
Oi-oi-oi-oi
Everyone's against me
Oi-oi-oi-oi
Everyone's against me
Oi-oi-oi-oi
song performed by by Ramones from Adios Amigos
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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BS Projectors
Oh they will and they know they can BS.
Those BS projectors.
Killers of relationships!
Their own,
And all of those of family members.
Friends and friends of friends.
Co-workers and 'their' associations.
When they begin projecting there is no end.
They never tell the truth about dilemmas.
They hope innuendo toasted with hearsay,
Will do!
Those BS projectors project,
With distortions like none ever knew.
With an image they select that projects,
What they want others to view!
BS projectors do a smokescreen...
On minds.
Like hoodwinkers who get their due too!
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
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Family Of Friends
How do you live,
in a family,
that never shows love,
that only brings drama and chao,
upon the table of life.
...
How?
because you surround yourself,
with another kind of family.
...
A family,
that never judges you,
won't pull you to the ground,
but pick you up when your down in the dirt.
...
People who,
you can tell anything too,
and won't think differently of you,
after they know,
your deepest,
and darkest most kept secrets.
...
This family,
isn't blood related,
but so much more,
their a family of my friends.
: : end: :
written: 11/13/05
poem by Broken Angel
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What Is Family?
A family is love
That puts itself above
Everything else in this world.
A family is trust
That's fair and just
In its treatment of each other.
A family is pride
And will never hide
Its feelings for one another.
A family is dear
And won't disappear
When things are getting tough.
A family is hope
That learns to cope
With all that comes their way.
A family is sound
With their feet on the ground
On every brand new day.
A family is kind
And will always find
The time to be together.
A family is wise
And treasures its ties
For always and forever.
poem by Edwina Reizer
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