What Is It They Should Feel
I never 'thought' to be me.
I always knew 'me'.
And I was...
Me.
Clearly defined.
And did not mind in my own mind...
That was mine,
The acceptance.
I've been cool with it.
It's a relationship I'm glad I did not miss.
However...
I never knew some pretended,
To be a 'them' they were not.
I was shocked!
Until I saw them in and out of pretensions.
They introduced with familiar shallowness.
And that with not knowing 'who' they are...
Has left what it is they should have been,
Unknown.
And that is why they have no identity.
None that goes recognized or used,
To provide them comfort.
They seem so unrelaxed and 'staged'.
They are simply non-entities.
Seeking to be unified,
By a commonness they see...
But no one feels or can relate,
What it is they should feel.
It is a desperation to save themselves.
From themselves.
But from what?
And to what depths 'that' is kept real?
Depends on 'who' and what they determine,
Is impressed by a falsity imposed.
And how severe the conditioning process,
Has been.
But then again...
I do suppose,
They have somewhere to go...
To induce 'some' kind of reality,
That frees them of their masks!
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
Vote! | Copy!
Related quotes
Prioritized And Lifted
I knew too well,
What my life had been like.
And that loneliness no one could touch.
I was deeply mentally scarred and troubled.
Yes...
I had been there.
I knew too well,
The masking of pretensions.
And the smothering of those emotions...
Afraid to let anyone see them show.
I have been there,
To numb them...
With alcohol or weed.
I have been there with a broken heart,
Many times to feel inside me bleeding.
I knew too well,
What my life had been like.
And that loneliness no one could touch.
I was deeply mentally scarred and troubled.
I had been there.
And going back,
I don't intend to do.
To feel again pain is not one of my pursuits.
Not back to back to scrape my knees!
Naw.
I don't think so.
Even with knee pads...
That's not happenin'!
Being at a place that drains to remain there?
For purposes to have others see one unchanged...
Is a selfishness that provides for them comfort!
And I know that kind of environment too well!
I had been there too.
Doing just that!
Providing others comfort at my expense.
Now I provide my own comfort.
Which to me makes much more sense...
In the maintaining of my peace of mind and happiness.
And those who proclaim I have changed...
As if one's purpose in life is to remain the same,
Are right!
I decided my life had to be prioritized and lifted,
To the top of my list and agenda!
And those who believe this is against God's wishes,
Have no connection to God!
I had been there myself...
To undo that kind of ignorance!
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
Vote! | Copy!
I Thought You Knew
The only shame I claim,
Is not being honest.
When I took it upon myself...
To decide you could not bear,
The truth.
I pretended not to know it!
And now you are left to suffer.
Clinging onto delusions.
Hoping...
That what has been diminished from your reality,
Will survive to revive a time that has passed!
A time that has gone.
With no guarantee given,
That it would last!
Not to linger for you...
To pick up when you wished.
And to be carried on!
And I observe you in despair.
Wishing to revisit yesterday!
Wishing to do those things,
You promised yourself you would!
If only you could!
With intentions that are good.
And I was there...
Letting you believe,
You had time!
And I knew in my mind,
You were not living in yesterday then!
And I pretended not to know it.
I thought you were teasing.
And unwilling to show it!
And today,
No matter what I say to you...
You aren't prepared to accept tomorrow.
You are not living in the 'now'!
And doing that,
Now...
Can only bring you joy!
But you wish to keep...
Those memories kept in bitterness,
To refresh as if they sit to treat!
And I pretended not to know that...
Because I thought you knew!
Because,
Well...
I thought you knew me too!
But I realize so vividly now...
Both of us have been wrong,
For too long!
The only shame I claim,
Is not being honest.
When I took it upon myself...
To decide you could not bear,
The truth.
I pretended not to know it!
And the happiness I have discovered...
You would not understand it.
Even though I have been here.
And wanting it to be shared!
What you have found to rely on that comforts...
I view that as a sign of despair.
I thought you knew...
I have not been there to share that with you!
And that's the only shame I claim!
Not being honest.
When I took it upon myself...
To decide you could not bear,
The truth.
I pretended not to know it!
But you...
I know now,
Aren't pretending at all.
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
Vote! | Copy!
Clear Description
I am going to be me.
I suggest you do the same.
Or locate someone,
To help you find yourself.
Once you have given them,
A clear description.
And that may take some time,
For that to be defined.
Especially when so many,
Rely on familiar and similar minds!
And breaking away,
From that kind of programming...
Is a challenge to be empathized.
But not to stop and wallow...
In a sobbing sympathy!
If someone is not healing,
By the acceptance of the real deal...
Today.
When reality is taxfree?
And they still have no identity,
That is trusted with truth and honesty?
They can forget it.
They will never recognize themselves.
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
Vote! | Copy!
Whether Daggerless But...And, Or If Cloaked
I wish I knew your true identity.
I wish I knew who you were...
Coming into my lfe,
Daggerless but cloaked.
With mental teases...
That do not provoke.
Even though you could...
But you don't provide a heat...
To ignite and get that fire started.
I wish I knew your true identity.
I wish I knew who you were...
Coming into my lfe,
Daggerless but cloaked.
With mental teases...
That do not provoke.
Even though you could...
But you don't provide a heat...
To ignite and get that fire started.
Why?
Do you sense a commonness between us,
Perhaps?
Do you perceive my 'eclecticness'
Has a variety of pieces,
I make comfortably fit.
And you believe you know 'the how'
'The why' and reason I do this?
If there is a 'reason behind it at all!
I wish I knew your true identity.
I wish I knew who you were...
Coming into my lfe,
Daggerless but cloaked.
With mental teases...
That do not provoke.
Even though you could...
But you don't provide a heat...
To ignite and get that fire started.
I sense you like to wine and dine,
Under candlelight?
But you don't provide a heat...
To light and get that fire started.
Whether daggerless,
But...and, or if cloaked...
Or not!
We both need something to eat.
Curiosity may have killed the cat...
But this dude does not feed on teases,
Alone!
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
Vote! | Copy!
Acceptance of Limitation
An intelligence defined by its commonness.
With conditioning affects,
Repeatedly unchanged...
Remains the same in its acceptance,
Of limitations confirmed and expected.
It is not reaching for heights unknown.
Or maverick voyages inspected to address.
Since little of that is nurtured or shown.
Within itself...
There is a discouragement left.
Although a willingness is welcomed,
A birth that clings onto a faith untested...
Allows a growth of hypocrisy condoned.
On foundations grown...
Initializing at its base.
This is not to be question or challenge.
Definitions have been set in place!
The realism of symbolism flourishes.
Never to be erased or end confrontations,
Taking place within.
A intelligence seeking comprehension...
Struggles with knowledge.
And attempts to avoid division.
But eventually chooses to separate in isolation.
To protect from the effective feeding of delusion.
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
Vote! | Copy!
Arresting Presence
The 'vision' was to be remembered.
But the hour of its visit was not.
A reinvention of my thought process...
Came to startle and speeded the beating,
Of my heart.
It did not terrorize,
But held me in awe and with surprise.
And before my eyes and ears appeared...
Magnificent light with familiar voices,
I endeared.
Immediate comfort with peace was mine.
Whatever 'it' was...
I knew it was divine.
And I could not protest,
Its arresting presence.
'What do you think 'it' was? '
I don't know!
But I'm glad I'm not on crack.
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
Vote! | Copy!
Never Thought It Could Be Like This
Never thought it could be like this
this churning in my stomach
the beating of a thousand bird wings
in my heart
I never thought it could be quite like this
softly playing my part
like it was a work of art
but really not knowing what to do
with this glorious gift of mine
you
a first kiss
like stars and rain dropping from the sky
you never said you were going to be there
to hold me as I cried
presents
presents from you is what I need
not showing me how to be
not treating me like a child
just treating me as me
a lovely beautiful queen
you make me feel to be
as I am kissing you with out regrets
I didn't know
I never could have guessed it could be like
skipping on clouds and sliding on rainbows
as I stubbled upon the unsteadiness of reality
I knew
I could never have a relationship with you
but is this what it should feel like
when I touch lips with the man of my dreams
you are
you not him
you are the man I saw
in my dream
it wasn't him
is love really as sweet as maple sirup in the morning sun light
I love it when we are together
when I feel as beautiful as a sun set on horse back
I love it when it feels like you love me just as much as I love you
could this be the real thing
I never thought it could feel like this
poem by Mrs. Cynosure
Submitted by Poetry Lover
Vote! | Copy!
Conditioning
Well youre not, youre not who you think you are
Well we think that you are john or dave
But youre not, youre not who you think you are
Jumbled mass of preconceived ideas
From our birth we were given an identity
People told us we were great or small
From our birth we were given rules of right or wrong
Not forgetting the bullies at school
The world teaches us to think that life is full of limitations
The world tries to make us think that there are loads of limits
The world teaches us to think that life is full of limitations
The world tries to make us think that there are loads of limits
Welcome to conditioning
Welcome to conditioning
And as the world makes us feel great
And as the world makes us feel small
Oh so convinced of our identity
If we only knew it we just cant believe it we just wont believe it
Leading us to think that we are such a success
Conning us to think that we are just a failure
Leading us to think that we are so intelligent
Conning us to think that we are just a do-do do-do
Welcome to conditioning
Welcome to conditioning
Who is to say what is what
Welcome to conditioning
Who is to say what is what
Welcome to conditioning
Who is to say what is what
Er, sorry, ha ha
Who is to say what is what
Welcome to conditioning
Who is to say what is what
Welcome to conditioning
Who is to say what is what
Welcome to conditioning
song performed by by Howard Jones
Submitted by Lucian Velea
Vote! | Copy!
Majestic Ecstasy
I wish I knew you before...
You decided to cry,
For the rest of your life...
With that state of mind.
When will you feel deserving to accept,
A happiness that is within your reach...
Just for you,
Free of past regrets.
Although I know it is unrecognizable.
Perhaps disposable as well.
And on that,
I am not willing to bet, yet.
Forget those promises and missteps made.
I thought with us we would clear the slate.
And be done of those mistakes.
With others who came to introduced to us,
Baggage with issues packed...
To share with us their every heartbreak.
I wish I knew you before...
You decided to cry,
For the rest of your life.
With that state of mind.
You can not be honest with me!
Not if you aren't able to leave,
That hypnotic bleeding behind.
When am I going to occupy some of that time?
When will I begin to see,
The one I knew who now plays seek and find!
I am yours.
But not a part of you...
Radiates onto me to shine.
I'd like to know,
More than one piece of you...
You keep for me and say it's mine!
I wish I knew you before...
You decided to cry,
For the rest of your life.
With that state of mind.
I hope one day we will really come to meet.
Before, during or after...
When we do,
Come.
Together when we together...
With a majestic ecstasy,
Come when we meet.
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
Vote! | Copy!
No One Knew
Don't be afraid he said
When he took his hand
Slowly drove him mad when
He filled his head with sand
No one knew
Not even mother dear
She just cleaned her shelves
Her mind was struck with fear
Several years went by but
Nothing changed at all
Once I thought I heard the boy cry
Thought he took a fall but no
No one knew
What went on
Until it was too late
He shot him
No one knew
Anything about you
No one knew
Anything
And in the end
Everything seemed lost
He could not defend
Oh
song performed by by Green Lizard from Identity
Submitted by Lucian Velea
Vote! | Copy!
Rumors, Conflicts and Constant Gossip
I know your family has questions,
About me and our relationship.
And exactly what it is I do.
With a persistence to see us,
Eventually split!
But please inform them,
Before my impatience slips.
That the slut they believe I am,
Is not me...
But 'had' been you.
Before we met.
And honestly expressed,
Each of our past regrets!
I am no angel,
By no means do I have wings.
And I never pretended to fly,
To disguise my flaws with alibis...
Or compromise the truth I found.
However...
If they continue to ride on high horses...
As if manure that smells does not stink.
Tell them, yes
I might have been divorced before.
But I wasn't the one,
To teach you to be a whore.
You and I have discussed our blemishes.
And we needn't do that to open old sores.
And I was worse than you.
I was thisclose to prostitution.
And 'anything' they've ever said 'I DO' to...
Was to stay busy in our business,
Probably others too!
And we have chosen that to ignore!
That's why I prefer to have them,
Not around us anymore.
Now...
Should I relate this?
Since our past mistakes,
We've already dismissed.
Or is it with me,
You want to keep this...
Our private relationship?
We did not come together,
To smear ourselves with their constant...
Nonsense!
I'm not revisiting our past failures.
Or joining in to share their conflicts.
So they can decide,
What we have discovered...
It will be left up to them to ruin quick.
That kind of sickness,
I can identify and not putting up with!
Now...
Should I relate this?
Or is it with me,
You want to keep this...
Our private relationship?
Is it with me we've agreed there is a happiness?
Or is it your family you wish to please...
Knowing what 'they' share together,
Are rumors, conflicts and constant gossip!
And they talk and speak about 'unity'?
Please!
Should I relate this?
I can be very protective,
When it comes to peace of mind...
And my own happiness in a relationship.
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
Vote! | Copy!
The Road I Travel
With in my mind, I thought I knew
That I dare not travel back,
This road so dark, dim, and blue,
With trees, ever changing of truth.
This familiar path, so like a knack,
Within my mind. I thought I knew
The way down it and what I’ll do,
But all my thoughts seemed to lack
This road so dark, dim, and blue.
I tried to stray, to part from you,
With your spiteful cement, all black,
Within my mind. I thought I knew.
But I cannot, I won’t sort through
The sky of lies that make and crack
This road so dark, dim, and blue.
So vain, yet suddenly true.
To this place, I still travel back,
Within my mind. I thought I knew
This road so dark, dim, and blue.
poem by Sarah2 McMahon
Submitted by Poetry Lover
Vote! | Copy!
Fishing For Fresh Water Bass
By the time their minds begin unfolding...
They will have the consciousness
Of also knowing,
The ignorance they manifested...
Will provide such a stench,
To bring clarity to their eyes as well!
Getting accustomed to truth...
Is like being slapped in the face
By a 'trout'!
When all the time,
You thought you were fishing for fresh water bass!
And then all of a sudden...
A mind awakens to guilt,
And a polluted thought process!
You now see...
Had been addicting!
And those folks you 'had' thought were crazy...
And out of their minds?
You now find a desire to be in their presence!
And they now look upon you with suspicion!
Hey...
That's how it is!
NOW,
Attempt to have a conversation with someone...
You knew,
Before you lost the confinement,
Of your once narrowed mind!
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
Vote! | Copy!
Something for someone new
I'm lying here thinking
about the way i feel
understanding we could build
something so real.
I envy the look resting
in the depths of your eyes
it speaks of honesty
instead of some lies
you make me understand
things i thought i knew
i'm so glad,
that i've met you
i'm glad that you, too, came
from an aweful past
'Cause maybe you'll help me
to move on at last
I hope that you feel
the same way i do
and that you want me
the same way i want you
poem by Heather Taylor
Submitted by Poetry Lover
Vote! | Copy!
Grew To Believe
I did not awaken with dreams to write.
Or decide I was creative.
I awakened each day trying to fight it,
This appetite I had.
Especially when I thought that I had,
Something I should not want to have.
Few people I knew were encouraged to express,
An acceptance of their gifts.
I grew up in the projects.
And those who were 'different' were made to feel it.
Few people I knew were encouraged to express,
A happiness with talents they possessed.
With a gladness from others...
Who did not address an envy with a jealousness.
But a showing of a knowing that I knew,
Grew...
Inside of me.
Yes,
A showing of a knowing that I knew...
Grew!
A showing of a knowing that I knew,
Grew...
Inside of me.
Yes,
A showing of a knowing that I knew...
Grew,
To believe.
I did not awaken with dreams to write.
Or decide I was creative.
I awakened each day trying to fight it,
This appetite I had.
But...
A showing of a knowing that I knew,
Grew...
Inside of me.
Yes,
A showing of a knowing that I knew...
Grew,
To believe.
A showing of a knowing that I knew,
Grew...
Inside of me.
A showing of a knowing that I knew...
Grew,
To believe.
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
Vote! | Copy!
Feels So Good
It feels so good
I knew that it would
Nothing's gonna take this day away
Cos it feels so nice
Oh so right
Nothing's gonna take this day away
Was only yesterday
I tried to get away
And now this feeling makes you turn around
I was so very sure
What I was wishing for
And now my feet can hardly touch the ground
Cos the sun is shining
Holiday timing
I needed something to rescue me
Feeling ordinary
Now I'm ready
So come on with me
Cos
It feels so good
I knew that it would
Nothing's gonna take this day away
Cos it feels so nice
Oh so right
Nothing's gonna take this day away
I'm where I wanna be
Life in so bottle me
I took my cares
And left them all behind
I had to get away
Deal with them another day
They're outta sight and out of mind
Cos the sun's still shining
No denying
Something came along to rescue me
Feeling ordinary
Now I'm ready
So come on with me
It feels so good
I knew that it would
Nothing's gonna take this day away
Cos it feels so nice
Oh so right
Nothing's gonna take this day away
It's just what I needed
It's an emotional healing
It's a wonderful feeling
Nothing left to lose
Yeah
Cos it feels so good
I knew that it would
Nothing's gonna take this day away
Cos it feels so nice
Oh so right
Nothing's gonna take this day away
Cos it feels so good
I knew that it would
Nothing's gonna take this day away
Cos it feels so nice
Oh so right
Nothing's gonna take this day away
Cos it feels so good
I knew that it would
Nothing's gonna take this day away
Cos it feels so nice
Oh so right
Nothing's gonna take this day away
song performed by by Atomic Kitten from Feels So Good
Submitted by Lucian Velea
Vote! | Copy!
Fishing To Net A Big One
Excessive.
External.
Assessing...
To determine,
What one has to value...
Instead of that person's
Frame of mind and worth,
Says a lot to the one being assessed...
About the shallowness of the assessor.
A scanning done before introductions are made,
Does not make the doing of it...
A good first impression to leave,
For someone seeking a relationship...
With the hope to be seen with a prized trophy.
Embarrassment is usually felt,
When someone hollow has been told...
Their fishing to net a big one,
Would be better spent on obtaining lessons...
On how to approach those,
Who are accustomed to sighting a leech.
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
Vote! | Copy!
If you knew
If you knew how much I love you!
If you knew how much I need you!
If you knew how dear you are to me!
If you knew how much I miss you!
If you knew how many times I think of you!
If you knew how painful it is to live without you!
If you knew when I feel hell lot of jealous for you!
If you knew why so many words for you!
If you knew why so many music for you!
If you knew how much I wish your best!
poem by Asif Andalib
Submitted by Poetry Lover
Vote! | Copy!
Clean Slate
Envy of, a sense of true identity, a sign of confidence to see.
Because when she said "I love that music, too,"
she meant, "Only as long as you want me too."
So sad, we don't see, until we become what they want us to be.
It's too late.
I don't know why,
but what they want me to do,
I do it.
Powered by wealth,
changing myself,
and if they only knew that I knew it.
And it seems that the real life will have to wait,
because the world's so busy,
so busy, cleaning a clean slate.
Oh.
Ahh, hoping to find what's mine,
so I can lead a full life,
use a knife,
and dig in like a cannibal.
Out for,
for myself, but all the things I want are serving someone else.
I don't know why,
but what they want me to do,
I do it.
Powered by wealth,
changing myself,
and if they only knew that I knew it.
And it seems that the real life will have to wait.
As the world keeps cleaning, it's cleaning.
The spin cycle runs round.
A clear decision can be found.
Can't think when my mind,
my mind runs 'round.
song performed by by Quicksand
Submitted by Lucian Velea
Vote! | Copy!
For Him I Know Not: Viii
i never really explored
the depths of this soul
that people talk so much of
but when your eyes first met mine
and the lashes moved on their own
in disbelief if it's all for real
that nth part of a wink
i knew what eternity is all about
in that eternity i dived
deep into those unknown depths
ever since
i've been waiting at those
invisible depths...
25may2010
16.50hrs
poem by Indira Babbellapati
Submitted by Poetry Lover
Vote! | Copy!