Through Boobytraps, Deceit and Slander
My mission is to fulfill my own happiness.
And to share that with my family.
Keeping my eyes opened wide,
And stepping aside...
Away from those burdened by trivial pursuits.
And commonplace backbiting issues...
Does nothing to enhance my peace of mind!
And 'that' is my only objective!
I am not seeking conflict,
Or anyone to help me define who I am.
I am extremely aware of that.
And proud to express it!
And can't 'nobody' offer me directions.
With an interpretation of the steps I have taken!
I have found my own way!
Through boobytraps, deceit and slander!
And I am not trying to find,
Another mind to comprehend it!
It is what it is...
And deserved!
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
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Related quotes
Said Before To Say It Again
On my mind are these times.
And I do find these times on my mind,
Hard to define.
With a keeping of those,
Feeling these times have them boxed in.
And on my mind,
There is a reason to seek rhythm and rhyme.
With my visions set,
On what it would take...
To increase my happiness.
I've said this before to say it again.
I'm not looking for stoppers,
To block as obstacles to hop over.
Or the welcoming arms of acceptance.
With a hope that they will open,
The gates to a fence to feel I've been approved.
On my mind are these times.
And I do find these times on my mind,
Hard to define.
With a keeping of those,
Feeling these times have them boxed in.
Acceptance or not,
I'm not looking to get out of a box.
Too many have found themselves there,
To argue over space,
With little of it that to share.
I've said this before to say it again.
Those feeling trapped,
Like it exactly like that.
Fresh is the air,
One dares to breathe alone.
Revitalized is an atmosphere,
When the clearing of a sky,
Becomes recognized to the one who looks...
To discover the vastness of it to become known.
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
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No Peace Within It
Those who deliver lies,
Do their best...
To make them come true.
Only to prove to others,
How misery clings...
Onto a demented mind,
Seeking to be believed.
From a shallowness,
Conceived.
And there is no peace...
Dwelling within it,
At all.
Nor none to share or leave.
It stays in mental conflict!
This mind...
Exposed for others to see.
With a credibility that leaks,
A public bleeding.
From a self defeating deceit!
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
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That Is Not An Offer
How can you say,
With 'me' you have been direct?
I find you too convoluted.
Too introspective.
Too self involved with issues,
You have protected.
And you wish me to be the one you select...
To find you irresistible?
As if I'm seeking someone...
With looks and no depth?
Those days for me have long 'petered out'.
I use to have a pet!
But today I'll settle for all the peace of mind I can get.
And chasing behind mysteries...
I'd rather leave alone to be drama free.
Do you see how clear my eyes are?
You will not find them clouded with doubt!
Or vacantly awaiting for an occupation,
Of your BS planted to upset.
That will be a bet made you lose.
You will not find strategic steps of your 'mess'
Accepted here to endear to leave confusion.
And that is not an offer.
That is a conclusion.
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
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Resentment?
Resentment?
I have never met anyone,
With abilities and skills...
That expressed a resentment,
Towards anyone seeking to be convinced...
Talents they possess,
Could be used at someone else's benefit.
And there to easily access.
But had been ignored,
For another sought to address...
That left them with an impression to express.
Resentment?
How many people do you know,
Would give up their expertise freely?
To confess to anyone,
That a giving up of their unpaid time...
Had been rejected,
Without a compensation of payment done.
To allow a continuance of their peace of mind?
And this they kept protected.
Acknowledging how this was difficult to find.
Resentment?
I doubt very seriously if they had that feeling.
Perhaps relieved...
What they brought to offer to others,
Had not been dissected or scrutinized.
With a diluting done of their freely given abilities.
Resentment?
Would not be the word I'd use,
To define their state of mind.
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
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Sitting Seeking Pity
Never will these wounds known that I carry,
Affect you directly.
When I earned my scars you were not involved.
Not to see them inflicted when I enlisted,
Into the military.
Not to hear of my friends being killed and buried.
Or the toil that took on my emotions.
I've already done the numbing of the mind thing.
You were not there,
To see me grieve over the death of my son.
Or the pain I felt blaming myself and everyone,
Regarding how that was done.
Or when both of my marriages ended!
And I was then still quite young.
All you know is what you see.
You have no idea what is inside of me.
Or the devotion I still have for my family.
After years now spent not seeing my mom and dad.
Very close those feelings you will not believe.
Or seeing them die that has left me sad.
Nothing I do has been magically produced.
Even forgiving myself and others,
Has reduced me to tears at times.
When I know of those folks who have sacrificed their lives,
For their beliefs.
As you wallow away in pettiness...
To complain about your issues.
And how from you they wont leave!
While you invite them on a daily basis.
And you say of me for you I show no empathy?
You have no idea how much I care!
I am just not like you.
Sitting seeking pity.
Because my cries for help,
Is all I choose to do!
My knees are not intended,
To be bended and kept knelt!
Never will these wounds known that I carry,
Affect you directly.
I am too aware of those steps I've taken.
I am too aware of what it takes to celebrate life.
And too much aware of a happiness,
I have chosen to separate from what has happened.
Pulled out of despair and dragged away from strife.
I will listen!
But I am not here to compare to share to relive.
Any of your agonies on your sleeve you so willfully give.
I am here to assist your getting over it.
Not to sit with you and feast upon defeat.
I am not that kind of 'friend'.
And those friends you do not need.
So stop rehearsing your tragedies.
Let's take a hike through the park,
And hug a few trees.
Let's express to them our gratitude.
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
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Can Not Be Bought To Purchase
The finding of a peace within,
Comes as a blessing one can not explain.
And...
Becomes a feeling known one wishes not to change.
Anyone wanting to give their peace of mind away...
Either has too much of it.
Or afraid others might find them crazy!
And this is a possibility.
Since a peace felt within...
Is often interpreted as being self centered.
And if it is?
Few with a deserved and earned peace of mind,
Are going to care less how others address it.
Very, very few are going to show this as a concern.
Unless the living in bliss becomes too much to handle.
And as of yet...
No one has been arrested for experiencing too much joy!
To have peace within is a happening,
That can not be bought to purchase.
Nor can the value of it be priced to sell.
One's soul that has been sold on keeping it,
Can find nothing else that qualifies...
A reason why the ridding of it would be a thought.
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
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Peace of Mind...
Peace of mind is found in my everyday activities.
Peace of mind is the mind I us to make my own decisions.
Peace of mind is the mind of a sober mind
Peace of mind is mine to have
Peace of mind is the mind of someone doing there best
Peace of mind is my mind that I wake up doing what is right for me
Peace of mind is you’re to have
Peace of mind is found in you
Have a peace of mind
poem by Ms. Anika Martinez
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There Is Something About Having Peace
Everywhere I have been,
To travel and/or live.
I made it my choice,
To meet and share with different people.
I've been creative all my life.
And nothing about it is a mystery.
With an experiencing of it done,
On various stages.
Under spotlight.
And alone emotionally.
And today I can say,
I would have to think hard...
To express regret.
Every breath of life I have been given,
I am thankful to feel so blessed.
For anyone to recommend,
Or to me suggest...
What it is I should do with my time,
Have no idea...
The joy I have with peace of mind.
And that peace of mind is mine to define.
With a seeking I do not do,
To anyone to explain what I have gone through...
With a welcoming of it to keep.
And prepared to defend it,
From nosey busy bodies if I have to!
I wasn't born yesterday,
With a searching for compatible companionship.
Or sharing my life in an argumentative relationship.
Trust me...
I have donated.
And my charity work has been done.
There is something about having peace...
With a quietness on a daily basis released,
That I have learned to love and appreciate.
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
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Without the Expense of Therapy
I'm not this or that.
Or drive a Cadillac.
In fact...
I don't have a car at all.
And with the price of gas...
I'd rather sit on my,
Memories.
When I filled up my car.
And drove where I pleased!
To visit 'friends'.
Or just to witness different sceneries.
I did not do that...
To take for granted,
Where my life 'then' sat!
There is nothing like being aware...
Of having nothing valued,
That others care to share!
I don't have 'bling' or other things to impress.
From your point of view...
I have nothing to keep,
Anyone's interest!
And that suits me fine.
Since I do have peace of mind.
Unlimited.
And not one dime did I spend to get it!
Nor will you find me...
Wallowing in pity.
Because I have nothing you value.
To strut and flaunt upon the streets,
Of big cities.
Or belong to a clique.
You are doing your best,
To share fading pretentions with!
I never felt comfortable passing judgements.
Not the kind I am sure someday you will miss.
And every step I take...
Not one is placed,
As I look around...
Seeking to find anyone familiar,
To approve with explanation...
A way of life I find just fine.
And...
I might add,
Without the expense of therapy!
Am I touching upon a subject,
Too close that invokes a sensitivity?
You'll get over my provoking!
And the stroking of those jokes.
I am not one to enjoy...
That kind of teasing you employed!
You seem to have too much on your mind...
To define in these times.
Oh...
I did hear a rumor.
Psychologists have lowered their prices!
It seems this is their season.
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
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Of Non-ness
But at this time...
On these non-days,
When a sense of non-ness is existing.
I try to find in my mind,
A reason and a rhyme...
To define what it is I choose to decline.
And it is at this time,
I'm feeling quite fine.
And those non-days existing,
With a non-ness to grind...
To upset my mind,
I can't allow...
Myself to be twisted in the mix of it!
I once participated in heated debates.
About the absence of the right,
To enjoy the life I've made.
Without feeling I should trade away...
This happiness I feel and have,
I just can't walk away from to see betrayed.
And it is because at this time,
On these non-days...
Whether they come to others to keep and stay,
I wish agitation begin from me to fade.
Because at this time I made up my mind,
On those non-days bringing all that non-ness to find...
I,
Choose peace...
Over being demeaned.
Because at this time I made up my mind,
On those non-days bringing all that non-ness to find...
I,
Choose peace...
Over being demeaned.
And when that non-ness is there to share,
Because at this time I made up my mind to care...
I,
Have chosen peace...
And I've left the scene.
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
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Deceit They Perceive Is Hidden
I have never believed,
I was always right.
Or believed my opinions expressed,
Were the best.
No! An operating done on fumes of ego,
Is such a waste of reality.
And seeking excuses to make for my actions,
Is too exhausting for my peace of mind.
And there are more offended,
By the appearance of truth.
Than they are disrespecting someone,
With a deceit they perceive is hidden from others.
And the concealing of truth is difficult to do,
For anyone keeping it with them to introduce.
Since a truth introduced is not to be disputed.
It is what it is to defeat deceit each and every time.
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
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Innocent
Without hesitation she opened her hand,
Her father looked into her eyes;
He saw not a sign there of fear or guilt,
He knew she was not telling lies.
The thought of deceit
Had no place in her mind,
She was innocent right from the start;
Her hand opened wide
For her daddy to see,
Her eyes opened wide as her heart.
'I don't know where it is,
I've not seen it at all, '
Small defence from her lips, but it's true
That this innocent child
Made her father repent,
His apologies now, she was due.
'Please forgive my suspicions,
My harsh angry words, '
Said her father with tears in his eyes;
And to you my dear reader
The moral is this:
Simple innocence needs no disguise.
Written March 1995
poem by John Carter Brown
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In The Sky
High in sky
We are miles apart
Separated by seven seas but to seek start
You gave nod to seek union
The best way we could find was as companion
It was creating ripples
You were very kind and capable
Of taking decision
With firm determination
'Half way' I was excited at proposal
It had novel way to suggest an arrival
You had magic way of spreading wings
Beautiful songs of love to air and sing
You were riding on high waves
As it was you aim and craze
You were on highest mountain peak
Where I had no power to reach and speak
I will close the eyes and find her near
She may speak for hours without any fear
What a joy and happiness she was making to bear
And my god those words which she used whisper
I found her after years of separation
For seeking new approach and relation
She must speak her mind and come closer
She was and may remain dominant as ever
She haws opened up like fresh rose
I have no field to choose or suppose
She may spread further and offer refuge
I may not be then in position to refuse
She stands for joy and happiness
I have seen brightness on her face
A close fulfillment but never to claim
And firm resolve to share even the blame
She was and may remain always dear
Whether in embrace or in rear
She is star and always high in sky
I can only look at her and try
poem by Hasmukh Amathalal
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I've Just Come Back From Having a 'Moment
When I sit and visit with nature,
In a surrounded quietness.
I've come to eliminate any hints of conflict,
Others may share...
From an environment that permits it.
Nothing is like one's solitude at times.
It energizes with such purety.
Like air free of toxins.
And a mind relaxed,
Of pressures that come.
To undo peace that's done.
When I sit and visit with nature,
I am more aware of the leaves on trees.
I am aware of the difference between Pine and Oak.
And the array of birds sitting on their branches to chirp,
And sing.
Aware am I of the drifting clouds.
From East to West and sometimes reversed.
So aware am I when I leave this scene...
I do not thirst to hear those who habitually curse.
It unnerves my inner peace!
That peace I try to hold onto...
As I unball my fists.
That peace I try to hold onto...
As I bite my lower lip!
'Good Morning, how are you? '
*WHAT? What do you want? *
'I'm just saying good morning!
No offense.'
*I apologize. Forgive me.
I have just come back from having a 'moment'! *
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
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Fighter For the Right to Love
If you want to give me anything.
Give me something to enhance my peace of mind.
Continual platitudes don't do it!
A barrage of compliments...
I can see right through it!
Flattery is okay,
For those with egos to display.
But my needs are simplistic.
As are my desires.
I'm not one to race off into the woods...
To show how good I am,
At making bonfires!
Show me you can be yourself.
That's all I want to see.
I'm not asking for your resumé.
I wish to discover your hidden qualities.
And as long as you allow yourself,
To invite and welcome a pretense.
I'm going to do the same to you.
And when I do that...
I'm not seeking to make sense.
Not at all.
So...
If you want to give me anything.
Give me something to enhance my peace of mind.
Give me something I can return to you!
Like being real and genuine!
'And I didn't mean for those last lines to rhyme.
But you know I am a writer.
Did you know I was a fighter...
For the right to love, too? '
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
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The Mind Will Find Whatever It Wants
The mind will find whatever it wants,
To belabor.
The mind will choose to define,
Itself and what it defends.
That may or not be offense.
A mind confined,
Spends a lot of time.
In search to uncover its own comfort.
And even when that comfort comes to show,
A stubborn mind that it needs to grow.
That mind will always find,
A way that is done not to do it.
The mind will find whatever it wants,
To belabor.
The mind will choose to define,
Itself and what it defends.
That may or not be offense.
The mind will find whatever it wants.
Even if that is a haunting of itself,
To keep life a threatening existence.
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
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Peace And Pieces
peace of mind and pieces of mind
easy to find and hard to define
peace of heart and pieces of heart
present when together and absent when depart
peace of love and pieces of love
happy if its true and sad if its bluff
peace of family and pieces of family
good when sharing and worst when breaking
peace of soul and pieces of soul
good or bad our deeds play a lead role
peace of world and pieces of world
its price less as it cannot be bought or sold
peace to sleep and pieces of sleep
relaxes when deep and breaks with even a beep
poem by Fahmina Arjumand Misha
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Help Yourself To Happiness
Everybody, everywhere seeks happiness its true
But finding it and keeping it seems difficult to do
Difficult because we think that happiness is only found in places where fame and wealth abound
And so we go on searching in phases of pleasure
Seeking recognition and monetary treasure
While being so unaware that happiness is just a state of mind within the reach of everyone who takes time to be kind
For in making others happy we will be happy too
Because the happiness that you give away always returns to shine on you
Oars of That Boat Left Untouched
Would I take my mind,
Now relaxing comfortably with peace.
For excursions into conflict...
That has taken me years to release?
Would I take my happiness...
And pawn it for something less valuable?
If at any time before this time,
I had done that unknowingly?
It was not peace of mind I had!
I had to have been still in the seeking of it!
The only thing I would trade this blessing for...
Would be a cool breeze blowing.
As I floated down the Nile in a row boat.
And The Creator and I are reminiscing,
My recovery from making bad decisions.
As we drifted.
And both of us are sipping on another round,
Of Mai Ti(s) .
With the oars of that boat,
Left untouched!
That to me is worthy of negotiation.
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
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Some Peace Of Mind
You see me on the street, well you guess Im doing fine
Oh but its fantasy baby, almost all the time
Ive got to get away, by myself
Oh the way its going, soon be needing help
'cause Im just a man, doing the best I can
Dont you understand, I just want some peace of mind
You see me on the stage, doing my job
I learn to do it well, keep on singing the song
But sometimes it gets, so lonely out there
When youre on the road and youre going nowhere
Because Im just a man, oh I aint got no plans
Dont you understand, Im just trying to find some peace of mind
I have to stand in line, baby when Im in queue
I got to do it all, just the same as you
Got my doubts about it, oh but I try
Oh make it work with tears in my eyes
Because Im just a man, only trying to do the best I can
Dont you understand, I want some peace of mind
Oh Im just a man, baby I aint got no plan
Oh dont you understand, got to get some peace of mind
Oh got to get, got to get some peace of mind
Oh got to get, got to get some peace of mind
Got to get, got to get some peace of mind
Got to, got to, got to get, got to get, get some peace of mind
Got to get, got to get, get some peace of mind
Get me some, get me some, get me some, get me some peace of mind
Get me some, get me some, peace of mind
Get me some baby, get me some peace of mind.
song performed by by Van Morrison
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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