Those Who Laughed With Time To Waste

I never sought to be taken for a fool.
But there were those foolish enough,
Not to believe I was serious.
And perhaps that seriousness,
Had been misinterpreted.

And I have never elected,
To see them in that way.
Anyone making attempts,
To express their gifts and talents...
With intent,
Gained my respect.
Since I knew what that took.
I knew too well what that meant.

With those comments made by some and done,
And time that has come many have tried to shun...
I still have not been the one to evaluate.
A progress made.
However...
Few I knew have made great strides.
While those who laughed with time to waste...
Seem to have vanished to other places,
To grace their faces with fates they've faked.
Or wish to make attempts to do it.

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I Was Made To Feel Different In My Younger Years

I remember sitting in the corners of shadows.
Wishing to be invisible,
After making attempts to disappear.

I was made to feel different in my younger years.

My voice was deep at the age of twelve.
And my knees knocked.
I was aware I walked pigeon toed.

I was made to feel different in my younger years.

People were quick to critique me then.
When they would laugh at me.
I laughed right back at them to hide and cry alone.

I was made to feel different in my younger years.

I grew wiser before I aged.
And years it would take for me to learn to forgive.
But I did with a doing successfully.

I was made to feel different in my younger years.

Perceptive, empathetic and sometimes distant.
Removed from anguish I knew others felt.
Yet today I might sit with periodic embitterness.

I was made to feel different in my younger years.

I've learned to use my talents and gifts,
To lift me beyond any loneliness that visited.
And with slow and painful steps I grew to improve.

I was made to feel different in my younger years.
And when I self examine to reflect...
So happy I am to have held on to my patience,
With a giving to others a respect regardless...
If little of it was shown to me,
When I was growing to bloom.

I was made to feel different in my younger years.
Hungering then to be accepted.
I was made to feel different in my younger years.
Hungering then not to be neglected.

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Rudyard Kipling

The Vampire

A fool there was and he made his prayer
(Even as you and I!)
To a rag and a bone and a hank of hair
(We called her the woman who did not care),
But the fool he called her his lady fair
(Even as you and I!)

Oh the years we waste and the tears we waste
And the work of our head and hand,
Belong to the woman who did not know
(And now we know that she never could know)
And did not understand.

A fool there was and his goods he spent
(Even as you and I!)
Honor and faith and a sure intent
But a fool must follow his natural bent
(And it wasn't the least what the lady meant),
(Even as you and I!)

Oh the toil we lost and the spoil we lost
And the excellent things we planned,
Belong to the woman who didn't know why
(And now we know she never knew why)
And did not understand.

The fool we stripped to his foolish hide
(Even as you and I!)
Which she might have seen when she threw him aside --
(But it isn't on record the lady tried)
So some of him lived but the most of him died --
(Even as you and I!)

And it isn't the shame and it isn't the blame
That stings like a white hot brand.
It's coming to know that she never knew why
(Seeing at last she could never know why)
And never could understand.

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Congratulations

(dave gibson, patti stephens)
Congratulations
You made a fool out of me
I hope youre happy
So now just let me be
I might be slow to lovers
But I catch on eventually
Congratulations
You made a fool out of me
Anticipation
You kept me waiting in line
Your situation did not allow you time
So Id sit home alone
Pretending someday youd be mine
Congratulations
You made a fool of me this time
Then he played it smart
You stole my heart
And tore my world apart
Guess you always knew
Id be the perfect fool
Congratulations baby
You win, I lose
Imagination
The way I dreamed it could be
Ooo, the sweetest sensation
Of how you made love to me
But now the visions gone
Its time to face reality
Congratulations
You made a fool out of me
Congratulations
You made a fool out of me

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Essential

I know I am more than qualified.
Every moment of my life,
Has been scrutinized under microscope.
When I used the bathroom...
There were those who gave up hope,
I could do that on my own.
Every step I made has been followed.
And attempts to overcome my weaknesses...
Were spent in public view.
I did not hide behind a desk.
Nor group with a clique...
To mask my defects.
I know I am more than qualified.
Every moment of my life,
Has been scrutinized under microscope.
I had been considered foolish...
Quite lazy and a joke.
And as I realized those who found time to criticize...
I knew then I was more than qualified.
Since I used my time...
Clearing obstacles off my path.
And thanking God along the way...
I had humor left to laugh,
At those who took their valuable time...
Finding fault with what I did.
When all I've done is to use my mind!
And blessed to have teachers,
Who knew how to subdue my ego!
And thanks to them I let that go when it annoyed!
I know I am more than qualified.
I am removed from that which had blinded my eyes!
Which in fact...
Just might make some folks highly dissatisfied,
That I have made my credentials far more essential...
Than I have utilized!
I like to keep that as a surprise!
It's fun to throw around a resumé every now and then.
Not to impress.
But just to get a moment's rest when interviewed.

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You Made Me Belive

You made me believe we are meant to be
You made me believe in more than just you and me
You made me believe in something rare
You made me believe in something we share

You made me believe miracles could happen
you made me believe I could do something's i never knew I could do

You made me believe,
its sounds kinda funny,
but you made me believe
IN LOVE
Thats sweeter than honey

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Grew To Believe

I did not awaken with dreams to write.
Or decide I was creative.
I awakened each day trying to fight it,
This appetite I had.
Especially when I thought that I had,
Something I should not want to have.

Few people I knew were encouraged to express,
An acceptance of their gifts.
I grew up in the projects.
And those who were 'different' were made to feel it.

Few people I knew were encouraged to express,
A happiness with talents they possessed.
With a gladness from others...
Who did not address an envy with a jealousness.

But a showing of a knowing that I knew,
Grew...
Inside of me.
Yes,
A showing of a knowing that I knew...
Grew!

A showing of a knowing that I knew,
Grew...
Inside of me.
Yes,
A showing of a knowing that I knew...
Grew,
To believe.

I did not awaken with dreams to write.
Or decide I was creative.
I awakened each day trying to fight it,
This appetite I had.
But...
A showing of a knowing that I knew,
Grew...
Inside of me.
Yes,
A showing of a knowing that I knew...
Grew,
To believe.

A showing of a knowing that I knew,
Grew...
Inside of me.

A showing of a knowing that I knew...
Grew,
To believe.

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Pointless Oppositions

So happy am I and pleased to see,
Others with talents to express them publicly.
When I began to do this I felt alone and strange.
Especially when people misunderstood my attempts,
To do what I desired and not seek attention to get.
Although it was part of the territory to be exposed.
I only knew of a love of it.
Ego had nothing to do what I chose!

And as years have gone by so happy am I,
To see others with 'gifts' express them in public.
I know how lonely and difficult it gets,
When others with no interests...
'Assume' they can pass judgement with senseless tests.
Hoping to discourage those born to do their best.
To only witness one determined to be who they are,
And achieve with a doing to reflect their best efforts.

So happy am I and pleased to see,
Others with talents to express them publicly.
And...
Putting to rest,
Those who protest with their pointless oppositions.
Only those who know,
Grow from those wounds to heal to show what's real.

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Knowing I Can Not Accept Less

When I approached...
I could not keep,
My sincerety from reeking.
I sought to seek your closeness.

Concerns I expressed,
With a heartfelt depthness.
Yet,
This became a sign for you...
To undo my goodwill.
And attempts to bring you joy.
I came to offer myself.
Hoping for a future,
The two of us could build together.

But you chose to see this,
From a limited perspective.
And from that mindset,
I have elected to disconnect.

If you are prepared,
To disrespect a sharing of my happiness...
What from you would come next?
Shallow comments made...
About whose life lived is best?

After taking the time to neglect my own steps,
Why should I linger in regret...
Knowing I can not accept less,
Than what is expected from you!
More abuse to confuse the issue?
I think not!

And in review of what has been done.
Giving in a way to you I pursued...
That has been thorough and thoughtlessly crude.
With a mindlessness shown to shun?
Why should I wish,
For a mending of this distance?
Needing not for me to miss.

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Unintended Blunder

Accepting and foolish,
Is the one who believes...
That derogatory statements made,
Are spoken by the one unaware...
Of their content.

And those who make attempts,
To mask their offensive actions meant...
Do it to get attention for their misdeeds.
With a pleading for a forgiveness,
As if an unintended blunder has been made.

People with open mouths,
Know exactly what comes out of them.

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Others See Clearly

You went out of your way...
To have me appear to be a fool.
Gathered with your relatives and close friends...
And made sure you had them believe that too!
You remarked about my attempts,
And embellished them with criticisms meant.
Until you felt your actions sealed...
Me as a joke,
To provide your zest and zeal!

You went out of your way...
To have me appear to be a fool.
But I wonder today what your thoughts are now?
Since what you set out to prove...
Has made others see clearly,
Which one of us can be certified now...
To be that fool you saw,
Had to be obviously you!

Congratulations!
Your efforts have been duly noted!

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Sorry Suzanne

The Hollies
Sorry Suzanne
(Geoff Stephens/Tony Macauley)
Single release february 1969
I can't make it if you leave me
I'm sorry Suzanne believe me I was wrong
and I knew I was all along
forgive me
I still love you more than ever
I'm sorry Suzanne for ever hurting you
you know I never wanted to
I'm truly sorry Suzanne.
I could never ever justify
all the tears I've made you cry
but I do regret it, my Suzanne
You gotta believe me
I was looking round for someone new
what a foolish thing to do
all the time I knew it
heaven knows what made me do it girl
I can't make it if you leave me
I'm sorry Suzanne believe me
I was wrong
and I knew I was all along all along
forgive me
{Interlude}
I'm truly sorry Suzanne.
If you would only take me back again
things would be so different then
what I wouldn't give for
one more chance to live for you Suzanne.
I can't make it if you leave me
I'm sorry Suzanne believe me
I was wrong
and I knew I was all along all along
forgive me
I still love you more than ever
I'm sorry Suzanne for ever hurting you
you know I never wanted to
I'm truly sorry Suzanne.
{postlude fadeout}

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Unintending To Be Perceived As Offensive

I accept with appreciation,
Compliments from others.
Who become aware of my attempts.

Sometimes I wish,
I could express more enthusiasm.
To show such thankfulness for such gifts.

And this I've done for many years in my routines.
With a doing done I do,
In a process that of my creation sees.

I accept with appreciation,
Compliments from others.
Who become aware of my attempts.

Sometimes I wish,
I could express more enthusiasm.
To show such thankfulness for such gifts.

And I do say, 'Thank you.'
Since I am grateful for the attention my gifts get.
Although I consider myself an 'elf' sometimes,
Just doing my part as God's work in progress.

With a doing at times God knows,
Can be a bit mischievous with a willingness unintending.
To be perceived as offensive when that deed I do gets done.

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I Have A Woman Inside My Soul

I have a woman inside my soul,
Her eyes sombre and sad.
She waves her hand to try to reach me,
But I cant hear what she says.
I wish I knew what she says,
I wish I knew what she wants,
I wish I knew what she says to me,
I wish I knew what she means to me.
I see an asphalt road inside my soul,
Its pale even in a warm summers day.
It stretches into the mist and calls me,
But I dont know what it takes.
I wish I knew what it takes, (I wish I knew)
I wish I knew what it gives, (I wish I knew)
I wish I knew what it says to me, (I wish I knew)
I wish I knew what it means to me. (I wish I knew)
I see a tombstone inside my soul,
Its old and mossy, covered in dead leaves.
It stands with an engraving on it surface,
But I dont know what it reads.
I wish I knew what it reads, (I wish I knew)
I wish I knew what it says, (I wish I knew)
I wish I knew what it says to me, (I wish I knew)
I wish I knew what it means to me. (I wish I knew)
(yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, hey)
I feel snow covering inside my soul,
Its hard and shining in shades of grey.
No footsteps ever made their marks,
And I dont know when it melts.
I wish I knew when it melts, (I wish I knew)
I wish I knew when it happens, (I wish I knew)
I wish I knew if it happens at all, (I wish I knew)
I wish I knew what it means to me. (I wish I knew)
I hear a stream running inside my soul,
Its cold and clear and carries a tune.
But I dont know what it sings and tells,
I dont know where it goes.
I wish I knew what it sings,
I wish I knew where it goes,
I wish I knew what it sings, (I wish I knew)
I wish I knew where it goes, (I wish I knew)
I wish I knew what it sings. (I wish I knew)
(I wish I knew)
(I wish I knew) (yeah!)
(I wish I knew)
(I wish I knew)

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Please

So you never knew love
Until you crossed the line of grace
And you never felt wanted
'Til you had someone slap your face
So you never felt alive
Until you'd almost wasted away

You had to win
You couldn't just pass
The smartest ass
At the top of the class
Your flying colors
Your family tree
And all your lessons in history

Please...please...please...
Get up off your knees
Please...please...please...
Please...

So you never knew
How low you'd stoop to make that call
And you never knew
What was on the ground 'til they made you crawl
So you never knew
That the heaven you keep

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Just Your Presence Alone

Wherever you are going,
I am happy...
To have chanced upon your presence.
And it was here.
It is a thrill to remember.

You are full of life,
And irrestible energy.
The light within you is so bright,
It's radiance glows around you.

To witness it,
I know I've been blessed.
But if I may make one suggestion?
Do you see those untrimmed hedges,
Surrounding those wilting trees?
Do not make any attempts,
To add your sparkle to them.

Why?

I've seen attempts made in the past.
By those attracted to their sadness.
But around these parts...
Those attempts made will be resented.
Trust me.
What you see...
Most folks around here regard,
As their motivation.

Wherever you are going,
I am happy...
To have chanced upon your presence.
And it was here.

However,
Let me make this clear...
Do not spend years trying to convince anyone,
What you bring to offer...
Is inspiring and to their benefit!
Just your presence alone,
Poses to them a threat.

'You shouldn't be so negative.'

Negative?
You have no idea how positive I am.
I am one of few around here,
Willing to express the truth.
You stay here long enough,
You will find that out for yourself.

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Never Far Away (feat. Richard Marx)

Every day I'd wake and ask myself
Was I strong enough for you
Foolish doubts and fears took me away
I'm sorry now you never knew
For so long I've wondered where you are
Underneath a tapestry of stars
In my heart I knew you'd come again
I just didn't know where or when
Heaven waits for us
Through love's open door
And it's brought you back to me once more
Heart don't fail me now
Now that you are near
Love was never faraway from here
I have tried to make some sense of this
Guess I needed time away
Once I realized how foolish I'd been
I couldn't waste another day
I forgive you with my heart and soul
And now it's time for us lose control
Take me in your arms like you did before
Darling,don't talk anymore
CHORUS
Somewhere deep inside I always knew
That I was meant to spend my life with you
You're the only answer to my prayers
I knew that love would lead us back somewhere
Through love's open door
And it's brought you back to me once more
Heart don't fail me now
Now that you are near
Love was never faraway from here

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You Made Me Love You

Ive been worry all day long
Dont know if Im right or wrong
I just cant help what I say
Your love make me speak this way
Why,oh why should I feel blue
Once I used to laugh at you
But now Im cryin
No use denyin
But no one else but you what do
You made me love you
I didnt wnat to do it
I didnt wnat to do it
You made me want you
And all the time you knew it
I guess youve always knew it
You made me happy sometimes
You made me glad
But there were times,dear
You made me feel so bad
You made me sigh for
I didnt wanna tell ya
I didnt wanna tell ya
I want some love,thats true
Yes I do,deed I do
You know I do
Gimme,gimme what I cry for
You know youve got the
Kind of kisses
That Id die for
You know
You made me love you

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Experiencing The Meaning Of Freedom

To be scrutinized over periods of time,
Eventually brings to one a liberty...
To choose to do what they please.
Knowing in the doing of it...
Someone's going to mention,
What is being done!

The how. The when. The where. And the 'who'.
Questioning the 'why' to create their own answers.
To make anyone listening come to wonder,
What their own lives would be like...
Experiencing the meaning of freedom?

And what gives others the right to waste their time,
Making attempts...
To evaluate those minding their own business.
Something many living today find most difficult to do!

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The Making of a Man

When God made Adam long ago, He fashioned him supreme,
A billion thoughts that he might know his life was not a dream...
Thus no excuses could release that Man that God had made,
If by his sins he lost God's peace and through guilt was dismayed...

When God made Adam long ago, the angels gave God praise,
They did not treat Man as a foe, so new to Godly ways...
Yet Lucifer was mortified when Eve was introduced,
As God created from Man's side this female not refused...

When God made Adam long ago and Eve, his helpmate wife,
In whom new children were to grow when they made love and life,
Then Satan knew they would not die if children must exist...
And so he tricked them with a lie that they did not resist...

When God made Adam long ago, He knew him through and through,
He also let grace overflow, despite each sinful view...
Thus from God's Eden Man was sent and Adam's sons knew shame,
As through each day of sin they went, with each to bear the blame...

When God made Adam long ago, in time to see him fall,
He chose to send His Son below, a sacrifice for all...
God filled the Scriptures with this news, as prophets voiced His plans
Worldwide to Gentiles and to Jews dispersed across the lands...

When God made Adam long ago, He paused to count the cost!
For sin would wander to and fro and Hell would claim the lost!
Lord Jesus died, passed by Death's Door, with courage unsurpassed!
The making of a man, for sure... Our Saviour, first to last...

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There Is No Contradiction

Why is it wished that he be replaced?
Your opponents believe he is great!

'He is incompetent.
Knows nothing about diplomacy.
Has failed every test thrown in his face.
And has ruined all our lives.
He is the reason wht our standards and values,
Have taken a steady nose dive.

That's odd.
You made the same exact comments,
That last time we sought your opinion.
But then...
Someone else had been elected years ago.
What is your explanation,
For what seems to be a contradiction.

'Oh?
There is no contradiction at all.
Those are the same comments I will make,
Whoever is elected and sits in that seat of power.
I am exercising my right to complain and speak my mind.
Like the rest of the ones protesting the loss of their entitlements.
And those high paying jobs we had for doing absolutely nothing,
That we miss dearly.
No!
There is no contradiction.
I am just as self centered now as I was back then! '

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