Rather Not Be Bothered

There is nothing about redundancy,
I'd like to review.
It seems so...repetitive,
And recycled.
Like a bad habit used to amuse...
And excused as accepted.
This gets as old as hearing 5th graders,
Threatening to run away from home!
I tried that myself.
Until I got tired of saying the same thing over again.
And arriving back just around supper time.
I was getting the hint!
With or without my presence...
Time was going to be taken to eat!
And my absence was getting a bit too familiar!
So I adapted to other tactics.
None proved to be tear worthy.
Only my own seemed to flow!
I was awakened quite early in life!
Redundancy provides a similar comfort!
Until something drastic...
Like growing up happens.
Or the realization that the same routines,
Seldon provide new observers.
And those familiar with these acts...
Have lost a desire to express empathy!
Or a wish to make eye contact.
It's a clue they would rather not be bothered.
Thanks to God I found better usages for my time.
Or I'd be totally dependent on making excuses,
For myself and my actions.

poem by Lawrence S. PertillarReport problemRelated quotes
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This 'Thing' About Time

I have this 'thing' about time.
And those who express,
Time for them is meaningless.

It is like having a discussion about discipline.
And many can intellectualize it...
But the act of it is too distant for them.

Being on time some define,
Is stated for the purpose to be on it and not late.
Others will take it and waste it as they see fit.
Not arriving before or on time at all.
Just to have another irritated losing patience...
Awaiting to hear an excuse someone makes.

I have this 'thing' about time.
And those who express,
Time for them is meaningless.

It is like having a discussion about discipline.
And many can intellectualize it...
But the act of it is too distant for them.

And long past the hour,
Someone appears in an atmosphere...
That by the minute is getting sour.

And more time is spent,
Listening to inventive excuses...
Describing why they had not called,
To apologize at all.

I have this 'thing' about time.
And those who express,
Time for them is meaningless.
With no sign of respect...
To the one that is questioned,
Why is it they seem to be quite upset!

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Using Outdated Tactics

It is believed...
By those limited in mind.
That if one's presence is avoided,
An influence that one 'may' have over others...
Will also go ignored.
And this approach they believe is most effective.

However...
This is not the year 1999.
And for many 2012 has not arrived.
As they are found using outdated tactics,
Elementary school children use for practice.
And bored they have become with the redundancy.

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Hush The Fuss

You've been familiar with the bottom,
But it's time to look up.
And dropp excuses if you got 'em,
With a mind corrupt...
On stuff!
And thinking life is too tough.
And that you've had enough,
Because the life you live is just too rough.
Hush the fuss.
Since too many got it rougher.

You've been familiar with the bottom,
But it's time to look up.
And dropp excuses if you got 'em,
With a mind corrupt...
On stuff!
Hush the fuss.
Since too many got it rougher.

You complain about the trivial things.
But...
Hush the fuss.
Since too many got it rougher.

You want to blame your pain on others to name,
But...
Hush the fuss.
Since too many got it rougher.

And you want to play the same tired games,
But...
Hush the fuss.
Since too many got it rougher.

Hush the fuss.
Hush the fuss.
Hush the fuss,
Since too many got it rougher.

You've been familiar with the bottom,
But it's time to look up.
And dropp excuses if you got 'em,
With a mind corrupt...
On stuff!
But...
Hush the fuss.
Hush the fuss.
Yes,
Hush your fuss,
Since too many got it rougher.

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Excuses

Why no one will help me
I am too dumb I am too smart
They'll not understand me
I am lonely
They'll hate me
And there is not enough time
It's too hard to help me
And god wants me to work
No resting no lazy
These excuses how they served me so well
They've kept me safe
They've kept me stoic
They've kept me locked in my own cell
I'm too far from home
It takes far too much energy
And I cannot afford to
No one will ever see me
These excuses how they served me so well
They've kept me safe
They've kept me stoic
They've kept me locked inside my cell
These excuses how they're so familiar
They've kept me blocked
They've kept me small
They've kept me safe inside my shell
Bringing this into the light
Shakes their foundation
And it clears my side
Now my imagination
Is the only thing that limits
The bar that is raised to the heights
No one can have it all see
I have to they want me to
And I can't let them down
I'll never be happy
These excuses how they served me so well
They've kept me safe
Theyve kept me small
Theyve kept me locked inside my cell
These excuses how they're so familiar
They've kept me small
They've kept me stoic
They've kept me locked inside my cell

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And yet We Sit in Accepted Procrastination

The time we are given to do what it is,
Seems...
Isn't enough.
It does not seem enough.

The time we are given to do those things,
We wish for us someday would bring...
To appear as if through the thinnest of air.
Seems...
Isn't enough.
For us it just doesn't seem enough.

And yet we sit in accepted procrastination.
Hesitating with that time we get...
To make excuses,
For not doing that what is wished.
Or making plans to have it fit,
With that time given,
To allow it.

The time we are given to do what it is,
Seems...
Isn't enough.
It does not seem enough.
But a wasting of it many do not admit.

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Head Creeps

No more time
Just one more time
So crazy, beat the strain
Too lazy, shake the gray
So, and she willed the rain
So let me be defamed
Your redundancy stains
Tired of infantile claims
Like puppets on a string
Untangle you from me
Time to call the doggies off
Tired of the shadowin
Slide me to the side again
Slapped in the face again
No more time
Just one more time
Your redundancy stains
Tired of infantile claims
Like puppets on a string
Untangle you from me
So crazy, beat the strain
Too lazy, shake the gray
So, and she willed the rain
So let me be defamed
Time to call the doggies off
Tired of the shadowin
Slide me to the side again
Slapped in the face again
One day my plane leaves
Some way my head creeps
Some day my head leads
Some way my head creeps
No more time
Just one more time
Empty room sets the scene
Pick at me slow, pain fiend
Suck me through barbed screen
Anger becomes our queen
Tongue whipping forked black
How long until you crack
Surprised and set back
Lackeys loose talk for fact
Time to call the doggies off ]
Tired of the shadowin ]
Slide me to the side again ] (2x)
Slapped in the face again ]
One day my plane leaves
Some way my head creeps
Some day my head leads
Some way my head creeps
Creeps
No more time
Just one more time
So crazy feel the hate
Yeah, Ive got years to wait
I know its not too late
Lending clean hands of fate
Rise from the dirt Im in
Hide in anothers skin
Stick black dress doll with pin
Your mouth takes on my grin
So crazy (3x)

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Unincorporated Insights VI

Cauterized by divergent opinions,
We remain stagnant as our lives progress,
Similar to the hipolimnion—
With its waters still, aching to express.
The erumpent and sluicing fluids
Of understanding and dialectics
Flow in a stymied, wholly languid
Way when we need something apoplectic,
Something fluttering with violence and
Roaring with rage and swooning with romance.
Let us not pretend that we understand.
Let us be carried away as the advance
Cavalcades, washing out redundancy.
Are we blinded by irrelevancy?

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Please Please Please

Please please please
No more melodies
They lack impact, they're petty
They've been made up already
Please please please
No more maladies
I'm so tired of crying
You'd think I was a siren
But me and everybody's on the sad same team
And you can hear our sad brain screaming
Give us something familiar*
Something similar
To what we know already
That will keep us steady
Steady
Steady going nowhere
Please please please
No apologies
At best they buy you time
Until you next step out of line
Please please please
No more remedies
My method is uncertain
It's a mess but it's working
And maybe if you tried it out
You won't like it when you're crying out
Give us something familiar
Something similar
To what we know already
That will keep us steady
Steady, steady
Steady going nowhere
Please please please
No more melodies
They lack impact, they're petty
They've been made up already
Please please please
No more maladies
I'm so tired of crying
You'd think I was a siren
But me and everybody's on the sad same team and
You can hear our sad brain screaming
Give us something familiar
Something similar
To what we know already
That will keep us steady
Steady, steady, steady, steady
Steady going nowhere
Please please please
No apologies
At best they buy you time
Until you next step out of line
Please please please
No more remedies
My method is uncertain
It's a mess but it's working
And maybe if you want to try it out
You won't like it when you're crying out
Give me something familiar
Somethin' similar
To what we know already
That will keep us steady
Steady, steady
Steady going nowhere

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The Magic Wand Of The Too Familiar

it happens all the time
the most familiar things and events and people
come daily and they become so ordinary

and then
you wonder
somehow
something

unfamiliar begins to strike you
making some furrows in your face
it becomes magical

a wand of the familiar
turns you into a prince
a sword is handed to you
a horse for you to mount
upon

a heart that begins its journey
on some adventures
that were there once
in your youth

you become alive
then the world changes its colors
and you realize

you never notice
something had long been put here

how foolish you have been
for not noticing such a familiar thing?

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Leased Toys

Few have military backgrounds.
The ones that do...
Aren't the ones sobbing on another's sleeve,
About a life
Diminished by a lack of affordable materialism.
Or teased by weekly sales.

Once one decides to give their life away for a belief...
It's not difficult to see those weeping,
Without an emotion to express empathy.
Because a creditor keeps them from sleeping.
While those who give their time to civic duty...
Return to streets.
To be ignored!
Becoming homeless to live undernouished.
After displays of bravery...
And courage.
To now have nothing to eat!
On familiar turf they grew.
Played and chose to defend!

That's BS!
And other terms that could be used,
To express this 'wounding' of disrespect.
Shown blatantly and has long lasting affect.

Few have military backgrounds.
And they are the ones seen,
Screaming!
Because someone says they can not pay what is due...
To stay comforted in familiar surroundings,
With their mortgaged and leased toys!

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Familiar World

This world look so familiar
The air, I think I breath before
The music, I think I heard before
The journey, I've journeyed before
but all in 'once a life time'
It's my second journey into this unknown world
The journey I seem to have taken before
It look so familiar
Once in a life time, it seemed I was somebody
May be even the wealthiest man in the world
i don't know
Maybe a wretched, lonely man
I'll never know
But one thing I do know
is that I've lived once
And right now, It's my second journey
Into this very familiar but unknown world

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(Murder Poem) Shades Of Black

No empathy, no remorse, no recourse in my actions.
All I see is things in shades of black.
I was abandon as a child.
I'm alone as a man.
The goodness of the damned.
Oh how I wish I had a plan.
Something set in stone.
With many regrets I walk this life feeling like a reject.
A failure all on my own.
I don't need no help from you never did.

No empathy, no remorse, no recourse in my actions.
All I see is things in shades of black.
Their is poison in the water.
Their is treachery afoot.
Oh Oh just come look.
The blood has been spilt and they have no clue I did it you.
I don't even care if they did.
I'll take as many I can.
When everything has gone so wrong.
Sitting staring out the window with a revolver in you in hand.
What choices are left?

No empathy, no remorse, no recourse in my actions.
All I see is things in shades of black.
A nightmare of solutions unfold.
Each bloody as the next.
How can you ever truly live with it.
Settling for only second best.
The black knight ego's of arrogance.
Tunnel vision fills his eyes.
All he's after is the prize.
I doesn't matter who gets hurt on his way to it.
With deliverance I give you pain.
A message from someone who truly insane.

No empathy, no remorse, no recourse in my actions.
All I see is things in shades of black.

No empathy, no remorse, no recourse in my actions.
All I see is things in shades of black.

No empathy, no remorse, no recourse in my actions.
All I see is things in shades of black.
And it is time for my greatest attack.
As if anyone should be proud of such a thing.
The sweat pours off my brow as I become the butcher of butchers.
A dissection of a living to dead body.
Someone help this man, oh please anybody.
The urges to kill won't stop.
They are all hes got.
Taking out all his sexual frustrations.
These escalation will only continue.
They will not just die.
Or move on to a paradise behind the next dawn.
No matter how hard I try.

No empathy, no remorse, no recourse in my actions.
All I see is things in shades of black.

No empathy, no remorse, no recourse in my actions.
All I see is things in shades of black.

No empathy, no remorse, no recourse in my actions.
All I see is things in shades of black.
I feel nothing no more.
I don't know why.
I wish I could fix myself tonight.
I wish I could embrace love once again.
But wishes are nothing but useless thoughts.
The futility of the evil creature I am.
Hated by everyone.
So foul have I become.
A disease that can never be done.
Just kill me now.
To save so many.
Promise me, make your vow.
Cause I won't go down quietly.
I fight it for as long I can.

No empathy, no remorse, no recourse in my actions.
All I see is things in shades of black.

No empathy, no remorse, no recourse in my actions.

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Result of Your Creation

You don't care where it comes from.
Nor does a hint or clue,
Interest you.
Although it has come to confront...
You rather grunt in irritation.
Nothing about its appearance,
Stirs within you a contemplation to explore...
The origin.
You rather ignore it.
Just like everything you do that is done.
Everyone has begun to notice the crumbling...
Coming to do what has to be done that stuns,
But you!

You don't care where it comes from.
Nor do you wish to know,
It is what you reflect and your neglect
Has left it to grow!
To bring some to weep and many to sow.
Whether or not you accept it to harvest...
Does not affect the effectiveness of the trap.

And the setting of it,
Accepted or not is too damaging for you to take back!
Turn your head on that if you will.
But it is still a result of your creation!
A devastation of a planted ignorance...
You believed would bloom into fruit you would eat!
Like quick sales of stolen goods on urban streets!
Your mindlessness comes back to defeat you!

You don't care where it comes from.
Nor does a hint or clue,
Interest you.
Either you are too blind...
Or being ignorant is a desire you wish,
With a hope others will find in time!
And that time is not too far from your behind.
Unfortunately...
It is your mind that has come to find these times appealing!
With every denial you bring.

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Where Is She

Not a single day has passed without you in mind
Lots of excuses come across as thought to find
You were never away in the past for a single minute
You were uncontrollable at home and never remained mute

Whole day passed off amidst your little noise
You were always ready for something to poise
You may venture for something and make my blood pulses up
I had no option but to remain silent and shut up

Today she is not in this lovely home
I look at door steps for her welcome
I know she may come any time and knock
I puffed more from cigars and left thick smoke

You have nice art to make me smile
You will not allow gloom to descent even for while
You may keep me engaged in lovely conversation
Remind me all the time about commitment and healthy relation

Her absence has made me totally blank
From the sun rise I have taken nothing or drank
I must admit her presence as some source of strength
Without her I am unable to adjust or take comfortable breath

I can do nothing without her being on my side
She will lean on my solder and confide
Whisper lovely and sweet words in my ears
She had made me fully dependent on her for years

Today I realize her importance when she is not here
I used to neglect everything when she was with me or near
She won’t bother me for even small things
Life at home without her is dreaded for something

Lovely home is zero without her sweet smile
I am on bed and thinking for it meanwhile
How come females have strong will power to control?
When nothing can be made available without shout call?

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Lost

Searching in the crowd
For a resemblance
To no avail
No familiar faces

I once loved
A forbidden love
Oceans separated you from me
Virtually all familiar faces gone

I roam the dessert of life
Feeling all alone
Like a blind man searching
For a familiar face
The sound of your voice
The ringing of laughter shared
Of familiar faces
Barren, empty bossom
Swallowed by the dessert of life
All familiar faces
Passed with time...

06.07.2012

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Excuses

Yo, whats up, this is Ginuwine
And I wanna tell you
It aint no time for excuses with your woman
You be right or you be out, ya heard
Do it right, check this is out
This is my story
Theres a time that comes in a mans life
When is real, want it all, when his mind is right
It could come at any time, morning, noon or night
You would know at the time, nothing more to fight
He might not, and I know cause Ive done the same
You know Im right there with you, dog, but she wont
play the game
She will be done packed your bags, sit em all there
right outside your door
Cause shes tired of the lyin s*** and she aint
takin no more, oh, no she aint
Excuses (Everybody has one)
Excuses (She dont wanna hear them no more, oh)
Excuses (She said take that s*** elsewhere)
Excuses (She dont wanna hear no), excuses {She dont}
Excuses (She aint got time for them)
Excuses (So dont fill her mind with them, no)
Excuses (She said take that s*** elsewhere)
Excuses (She dont wanna hear no), excuses {She dont}
Take her out, hold her hand, let her know youll die
for her
Cause thats your lady, yes, thats your baby
Shes a seed, feed her well, watch her blossom out
And only the real players out there can dig what Im
talkin bout
Be that man, be that one, do the things she loves
Pay attention, should I mention how it all was once
You broke your neck just to get her, dont you pull
back now
Cause sooner or later shell be gone, what youre
askin now
Excuses (Everybody has one)
Excuses (But she dont wanna hear them no more, oh, no
she dont)
Excuses (She said take that s*** elsewhere)
Excuses (Oh...), excuses {She dont}
Excuses (Yeah, she)
Excuses (Dont fill her mind)
Excuses (She said take that s*** else, oh, yes, she
did)
Excuses, excuses (Listen) {She dont}
Dont fake nor front, tell her now
Make your choice right now
Tell her where you stand
Youre no boy or little kid, youre grown
Standin big, young man
Think what brought that in, ooh
All that s*** youre talkin bout like you aint
heard the phone
Shes up on it, dog, shes up on it, dog
And all that fake s*** like your beeper was off
Shes up on it, dog, shes up on it, dog (Ooh...)
Excuses (Everybody gots one)
Excuses (She dont wanna hear them)
Excuses (She said take that s*** elsewhere)
Excuses, excuses {She dont} (She dont)
Excuses (She aint got time for them)
Excuses (So dont fill her mind with them)
Excuses (Huh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no)
Excuses (No, no, no), excuses {She dont} (She dont
wanna)
Excuses (She dont wanna hear no excuses)
Excuses (Ooh, she dont wanna)
Excuses (Come on)
Excuses (She dont wanna hear them), excuses {She
dont}
Excuses (She aint got time, huh, she dont feel them)
Excuses (Ooh, ooh, she dont deserve)
Excuses (No, huh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no)
Excuses, excuses (She dont wanna) {She dont}
Excuses

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Redundancy in Abundance

Exuding eloquent dismal
Over the trickling perspirations
Of exhausting redundancy
Is but amassing more to credence
In the thicket of its abundance
I'd rather hold my breath
In a hiatus.

For one, the searing streets
Is full of stray cats making slinky love
With the baleful rake of amour
And their hoarse caterwauls
Disembogue the quintessence
That sex became overrated
And love dissipated
In the grazing of tongues
And bracing of flesh.

And there's the lubricated
Lubricous gears of the tethered clock
That never sojourn for a migraine,
Never sway slowly for a holiday,
And we pounce with it
Every goddamned day,
Impenitently hating the pace
Of every goddamned days!

I have seen a poet
Write about anything every time
Like the Asian snowflakes
That he'd never seen
Metaphysically or otherwise,
And efface the pedagogy
In the art of poetry
With depth and significance.

And there's a loneliness
That drove a man
To eat in the banquet
Of diurnal redundancy
Pretending to watch the T.V.,
Dwelling in a pseudo-revelry,
Clipping wings and depleting songs
Like a caged canary.

There is an impasse
In the chambers of the heart
That you held in your arms
With profane vigilance
That makes you wonder:
If a heart can still break
When it is already dead?

And all these redundancies
All these follies
Abates our pillars
And the fountain
Where we reel in
The gilded virtues of existence.

Do you know the remedy
Of the loathsome redundancy?
There is none.
The disease is inflected upon
The brittle bones of the soul
That would throb scathingly
Yonder your disintegration.

Redundancy is not a phenomena
That the gods had schemed
Like the symmetries of tragedies,
It is but a perspective,
Essentially, a lost corrupted perspective.

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IF I Had 'Their' Time

Time and again,
People say they have none of it...
To do that which needs,
Their immediate attention.

And time and again,
The time that is wasted...
For them procrastinated to selected excuses,
Easy for them to make.

These are the people who say it's never too late,
To again...
Be freed of making decisions,
With a putting off what they see others do.

To say like most people who choose foolishness...
'IF I had 'their' time,
Of course I could achieve similar accomplishments.
But unlike them...
I don't have that kind of time to do what I wish.
I am not that fortunate.'

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Unsolicited

Without the advantage,
And benefits...
That do not overnight come,
One's intended physical regimen...
Will more than likely,
Will be something not to be done.

And an absence of discipline,
To initiate motivation...
Seldom begins,
Without a doing.

But those committed to wining and dining,
Will find the time to spend...
Making arrangements for them.
And this says one thing about priorities set.
They have been effectively placed,
To make the best excuses.

And the best of excuses do come,
Unsolicited.

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Love Walks In

Contact is all it takes
To change your life to lose your place in time
Contact! asleep or awake
Coming around you may wake up to find
Questions deep within your eyes,
Things youve never realized
Chorus:
So when you sense a change
Nothing feels the same
All your dreams are strange, love comes walkin in
Some kind of alien
Wait for the opening
Then simply pulls a string
Another world, some other time
You lay your sanity on the line
Familiar faces familiar sights
Reach back remember with all your might
Ohh there she stands in a silken gown
Silver lights shining down
Chorus
Love comes walkin in
Solo
Sleep and dream is all I crave
I travel far across the milky way
To my master I become a slave
Til we meet again some other day
Where silence speaks as loud as war
And the earth returns to what it was before
Chorus
Love comes walkin in

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