It Was Me Who Let You Keep Me On Hold
It is not about you.
Although it had been,
For a number of years.
I awakened in a new mood.
And it was not attitude.
It was a consciousness.
No longer did I feel a need,
To be there for others...
Without my own needs addressed.
I am addressing my needs.
And you may believe it is selfishness.
After I awakened I just cared about what I felt.
And I feel blessed to realize,
Part of my life has been kept...
To live in the pleasing of myself.
It is not about you.
Although it had been,
For a number of years.
Now it is about me!
My needs and wants.
With desires missed I have yet to live.
It is not about you.
It was.
And it was me who let you keep me on hold.
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Related quotes
Feel
I gave you everything all I could give
It might not have been the life you thought youd live
I know it feels good to have you by my side
Even though I know you could just break my heart wide
I just have to ask you, one more time...
Did I make you feel like number one?
Did I help you see like stars and the sun?
Did I make you feel like number one?
Did I make you feel like lifes just begun?
Its like a puzzle, a piece that just fit
You never really needed to look for it
In your eyes I see my future and my past
I never really thought that we would last
I just have to ask you, one more time...
Did I make you feel like number one?
Did I help you see like stars and the sun?
Did I make you feel like number one?
Did I make you feel like lifes just begun?
We have seen all the good times and the bad
Waitin' for the next part we never had
To the highest mountain, yeah, I would climb
I just have to ask you, one more time
Did I make you feel like number one?
Did I make you see like stars and the sun?
Did I make you feel like number one?
Did I make you feel like lifes just begun?
Did I make you feel like number one?
Did I help you see like stars and the sun?
Did I make you feel like number one?
Did I make you feel like lifes just begun?
song performed by by Zug Izland
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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I Felt Freed
One day I awakened,
And there was an insignificance I sensed,
From yesterday!
That cleared the morning air.
There was something about my life,
That had arrived and I liked.
Appearing in my sight...
With such a happiness I could not ignore.
It was there to make certain,
I had been aware.
And whatever to me was done and/or said,
Before I laid my head down in my bed...
Prepared to flee.
Somehow this was unknown to me.
And when I had awakened it had fled!
No longer to me to be important.
To address as my priorities.
And I felt freed!
I felt freed.
I felt...
Freed!
To live a life much more motivated.
With a quest to face challenges...
I now seek and dare!
As opportunities to prove...
I can move anything off my path,
That isn't of benefit and doesn't belong there!
And I felt freed!
I felt freed.
I felt...
Freed!
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Breathing Freely
Breathing freely,
And adopting this as my number one...
Priority,
At first...
I brought along with it some guilt.
I was taught from birth,
Doing for others...
Provided me a sense of self worth.
And a doing for myself first,
Was a selfish activity.
And I thought about this,
Through the years of my giving.
And I thought about this,
With a lesser happiness...
As I continued to live.
If I am not happy,
To whom do I address this?
And who is going to recognize my unhappiness,
Better than I can myself?
And...
I awakened!
As if it was the first time I had witnessed dawn.
Breathing freely,
And adopting this as my number one...
Priority,
At first...
I brought along with it some guilt.
I was taught from birth,
Doing for others...
Provided me a sense of self worth.
And a doing for myself first,
Was a selfish activity.
Today,
Feeling selfish is the least of my concerns.
I am no longer seeking to prove I can be sacrificial.
I've earned and deserve the right to be happy.
Pleasing the needs of others,
To receive disrespect as a benefit?
Is a lesson I have learned not to repeat.
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Zero Covers All
Lately I realize.
I am a numb number,
living through life.
First child.
Date of birth.
Sixth star of twenty-seven.
Scorpio numbers six of twelve.
Studied tenth class,
Then 5-year’s graduation,
Every class I had a scroll number.
Exams written on id number.
Studied law.
Head churning three years,
with numbered sections.
Penal code, constitution.
Clauses of law in numbered sects.
Registered in bar council.
Legal practice.
Case files are numbered.
Subsequently I got,
House number, door number.
Phone number.
Mobile number.
Account numbers.
Credit card number.
Pan card number,
Folio numbers,
Car number,
License number,
Policy number,
Health card number,
Election card number,
Passport number,
Ration card number,
Ultimately, when you put me in morgue,
allotted me a number.
Which, I do no know.
However, I know a number.
I am a big zero.
It covers all my life
Yes, we discovered zero.
What a relief?
Does it not cover all?
fulfill all values!
By the way your number please?
X number or N number?
Infinite numbers.
________________
poem by Satheesan Rangorath
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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If I Awakened Without Life
If I awakened without life,
How could I prove it?
Or validate I once did live?
Who would know I even existed?
And what of myself did I live to give?
If I awakened without life...
What would it be,
That I would awaken to?
Would I continue to be a dream,
My mind created?
Or is all of this an illusion I have pursued?
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Number
I have no number
No number is related to me
Do not show me number
I have not missed any
There is no magic square
To fill the number
There is no number
I have also not trumpet
For number.
poem by Gajanan Mishra
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Do You Want This?
'Do you want this?
Come and get it.'
I slept with dreams.
And awakened as if they existed.
I awakened as if...
In my hands I held them.
To realize and never to let them drift.
'You want this?
What makes you think,
It will be made easy...
For you to touch and get.'
And I began to taste my dreams,
To me fed on a daily basis.
Years of impatience I knew too well.
Rushing to succeed...
Had me stumbling to fall.
I hated being teased.
'Do you or do you 'not' want this?
How else do you expect to get it? '
I could not shut that voice within up.
It seemed to taunt and I was beginning to have enough.
And then...
A process began within me slow.
Although my dreams and wishes would not let me go.
They were there holding onto me too tightly.
Slowly I began to seek teachings needed.
Gritting my teeth to qualify my desires.
And then one day I did awaken validated.
Feeling with a patience quite surprised.
And accepting what I had not realized.
'You want this? '
Yes.
Yes, I do.
I feel I am ready.
And I've got patience too.
'Good for you.
Now...
Just with a few more steps taken,
All that you wish...
Will eventually come true for you to exist.'
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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That Which Possesses My Life
It has been 24 years now,
That I decided to leave behind...
Every possession I had collected,
And had owned.
To be of comfort to someone else.
I had did this before,
Back in 1969.
For a similar reason,
That has blessed me...
With tremendous insight.
And I do..I can understand 'why',
People cling tightly onto what they possess.
It connects them with their existence to life.
And I am glad I've discovered...
I am life!
Not 'that' which I possess.
I awakened with a consciousness to that revelation.
And...
THAT which possesses 'my' life,
Awards me for expressing my gratefulness.
And so blessed I am to be aware of this connection.
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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You Dont Know Me At All
I woke up this morning with an attitude
Looked at the headline,
Put me in a real bad mood
Sitting here in limbo
Trying to stay sane
Between the end of the summer
And the coming of the blessed rains
And I feel dirty, all the way down
I feel dirty, baby, like this pretty town
I gave you everything on a silver tray
Could have been a fool for ever,
But Im not made that way
And after all these years,
I figure its time to say goodbye
Im doing you a favor,
I will not help you live a lie
And believe me
If you think Im gonna catch you when you fall
You dont know me,
You dont know me at all
I closed up the curtains
Learned to confess
Baby, I knew better
But you were such a pretty mess
You took my breath away
And now I want it back
Ah, you shouldve killed me,
You always looked so good in black
And after all these twisted roads
That weve been down together
I think its time to say goodbye
And believe me
If you think Im gonna get down and
Crawl
You dont know me,
You don t know me at all
Ohh, ohh
(really catchy guitar part!)
And after all these years,
I figure its time to say goodbye
Im doing us a favor baby
You know I cannot live a lie
And when you need me
And you think Im gonna
Be there when you call
You dont know me
You dont know me at all
You dont know me at all
Not at all
You dont know me at all
You dont know me at all...
song performed by by Don Henley
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Accepting the truth
it been two years since i lost you,
and the years are going up,
it gets easier to think of you,
but having you here will be nice too,
i know you in a good place,
i just wanted you to be happy,
God took you quickly,
you no longer have pain,
i can no longer hold onto you,
and i no longer regret that,
i know you still by my side,
giving me hope and feeling,
that everything will be alright,
you don't have to be here in person,
for me to be alright,
because you taught me everything i needed,
to be the person you wanted me to be,
i don't have to be surrounded by people,
to feel like i belong,
because it only makes me feel more alone,
i don't have to be accepted,
or to appear as normal,
for people to accept me,
because i am who i am,
i won't change a thing,
and i shouldn't have to,
just to be liked,
you taught me that,
why please other people,
when it don't make me happy?
and even though i miss you,
i'm glad i don't regret you being gone,
it was a part of life i don't like,
but i can live with it,
it is what it is.
11/02/10
poem by Mona Martinez
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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No Childhood
Grew up too fast
Childhood didn't last
Defiled at the age of 3
Changing my life permanently
Mom wasn't there
Life wasn't fair
Never met my dad
Neglect was all I had
Grew up too fast
Childhood didn't last
16 and pregnant
didn't know what that meant
responsibility aquired
overworked and over tired
child number 2 on the way
just another month - just another day
married and divorced by 23
struggling to find the inner me
trying to identify what love was
yearning to know if I was enough
Searching for my worth in man after man
floating through life waiting to land
3 years later - baby number 3
responsibility was all on me
as life moves on and the clock keeps turnin
days gone by and i'm still yearning
for the childhood i never had
for the chance to meet my dad
into my life walks my superman
claimin if anyone can save me - he can
he sweeps me off my feet
making me complete
i take his last name
and life isn't the same
i thank God for the opportunity
he's given by sending you to me
and as i start to open up and realize
stop hiding and open my eyes
i missed out on my childhood
and though i did the best i could
to be the mom i never had
give my kids my missing dad
and stil i feel inadequately
as i search deeper within me
to find out who i'm supposed to be
sometimes i feel like i have nowhere to give from
the places that were supposed to till me were never done
and so i grasp for an idea of hwo to be
the mom that wasn't modeled for me
I can't play, I can't pretend
scars of the past continuing to mend
i imagine and play how i think a mom should be
but more often than not it doesn't come naturally
nuturing was replaced by survival
when just trying to make it was all
i had the energy to do
and as i'm writing you
i realize that i missed out on my childhood
and i wonder if it's understood
I'm not the parent i want to be
but i'm the best parent that's within me
still making mistakes
but doing what it takes
to be a better mom than i knew
and as i'm writing you
i realize that i missed out on my childhood
poem by Miss Thang
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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27 Years! ! ! ! !
27 years of my life-
I lived like a wife,
waiting for my husband kiss;
Which i always missed.
27 years of my life -
Waited all the nights,
To share my happiness and sadness;
And i felt it was madness.
27 years of my life-
I spent with unknown husband,
Who has time to work;
And I felt like a jerk.
27 years of my life-
I spent with boredom,
And being a loyal wife;
I lost my freedom.
After 27 years of my life-
I still feel something missing,
I still keep looking;
And still waiting.
And the next 27 years will pass by:
Without my husband near by.
poem by Anju Addanki
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Creases
Falling to pieces
Fold up in creases
Baron trees bending with breeze
No wonder they have no leaves
My mind is a waste land with not thoughts
No thoughts than can hold my attention
Staring at the sky
Thinking if only i
Now i have a thought
No its gone again
Okay just relax and think again
Time to clear my mind
Think of a better time
Well they are a distant memory now
So have i succumbed to being alone to long
Have all my thoughts and emotions
Packed up and gone
Have i been lost from reality way to long
Is it to late to start anew
Can i return to the person i once new
This void i have deep in me
Its not of lost love cause i choose to be free
So what is this void that is emptying me
Maybe my life has gone stale and old
Needing something new excitement to take hold
I know i am just a number
A number in this game
What number am i
Are there numbers the same
Is there someone out there just like me
Seeking the answers of what they should be
Time will tell
Is there enough time to discard this shell
Shell of a life i have been living
Always waiting for a new beginning
How dose that happen how do i start
Where do i enroll how do i take part
Live life to the fullest enjoy every day
How can you do this when you dont know the way
My days are of writing and writing how i feel
Is there nothing left to write about
Nothing more to feel
Knowing you might some day come
Knowing you might some day come
and how unprepared I’ve always
been
like Mr. Sloppy
in Charles Dickens’
our Mutual Friend
I made a list:
not meat, vegetables, beer and pudding
but number l, warmth.
number 2, warmth.
number 3, warmth.
number 4, a good snuggler.
number 5, someone who sings
while he/she works.
number 6, a dancer.
number 7, someone who grows & is
intrigued by
the mind. And
by the spirit too.
Number 7, someone who is loved
by animals; and loves
them back without
a thought.
number 8, someone who smells
delicious.
number 9, someone whose anger
lasts no longer than mine.
number 10, someone who
stands beside me. behind me. If necessary
in front of me.
number 11, someone who
is a passable cook.
number 12, Someone who laughs
a lot, thinks I have a fine
sense
of humor
& has friends.
number 13, someone who can be
original in dress:
stylish
warlock –In silver, lapis
& black – to my witch.
poem by Alice Walker
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Not A Photocopy Or A Transparency
I do not need an answered survey,
To review responses...
As if I do not know details or understand,
What my life has been like.
And first hand.
I've known each day,
About those obstacles that have come my way.
And what it is I must do.
And who it is I must fight!
Forget those graphs with statistics crafted.
My eyes have been wide open,
Despite of outsiders...
Giving their opinions to convince others,
Information gathered...
Is a life I've known to live,
Whether wrong or right.
I've lived my life and not in hiding.
Day and night,
And for a number of years.
I am not a photocopy or a transparency.
Every emotion I feel is real,
Here inside of me.
And when I get upset with my feelings hurt...
It is up to me to know,
To what degree I've got to heal.
I do not need an answered survey,
To review responses...
As if I do not know or understand,
What my life has been like.
And first hand.
I've known each day,
About those obstacles that have come my way.
And what it is I must do.
And who it is I must fight!
Everyday since my birth,
Here on Earth...
I've observed and felt and grew.
And all of the experiences I have obtained...
I've learned more than one lesson!
I've learned quite a few.
And with each day I am blessed to live,
God has granted me the wisdom...
To know what it is,
And what it takes...
For me to succeed and complete,
Whatever it is that I must do to feel upbeat.
I am not on the sidelines,
Observing to be entertained.
I am an active participant and involved...
No matter who says what,
Or with unsolicited authority...
May say or claim!
I am 'me'.
Regardless of those labels attached to my name.
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Three In Numer
We three in number
Doing together
The work with us
We three in number
Gather mangofruits
Count flying birds
We three in number
Looking the world
That is smiling
We three in number
Staying together
And in peace
And we can not live
minus one other.
poem by Gajanan Mishra
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Ego
Written by ricky & marty wilde
All the time I try to reason with you
But I just cant seem to make you understand
Nothing seems to ever really get through
Cant you feel emotions like any other man
You never cared for anyone (anyone)
You never cared for anyone (at all)
Any love that youve ever given me
You only gave me for your ego
Look at how you wanted all of my tears
Any time you felt you needed security
All the nights you let me out on my own
Thats the thing that you just cant give back to me
You never cared for anyone (anyone)
You never cared for anyone (at all)
Any love that youve ever given me
You only gave me for your ego
Youre only plan it seems is look after number one
You just cant comprehend what it means to love someone
Stay away, get lost, get out of my life
Cant you see the changes now and at last Im free
Any plans I have just dont include you
And thats the one thing you wont take from me
You never cared for anyone (anyone)
You never cared for anyone (at all)
Any love that youve ever given me
You only gave me for your ego
Every time I tried to reason with you
But it seemed that I never made you understand
Nothing ever seemed to ever really get through
Cant you feel emotions like any other man
You never cared for anyone (anyone)
You never cared for anyone (at all)
Any love that youve ever given me
You only gave me for your ego
song performed by by Kim Wilde
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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She's Got My Number
She's got my number she always did
She can always see where my secret's hid
Everything about me is hers to tell
She's got my number she always will
She's got my number I must confess
One look in her eyes and I feel undressed
She can see right through all my little games
She's got my number she has my name
Late night driving with the telephone
In the car and I'm always
Waiting
song performed by by Semisonic from All About Chemistry
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Unwanted Number
You should hear the things that they say about me
Theyre saying shes no better than she needed to be
They dont know that he was kind and strong and tender
And now Ill never be another unwanted number
Unwanted number
How can I tell them?
How can I express?
How it felt to step out of this life and into his embrace
How can I tell them?
How can I explain?
All the love that I never had I found in him
There may be a stain on the family name
And if my father was here I think I know who hed blame
Mama says that he just doesnt care to remember
And all he thinks of me is another unwanted number
Unwanted number
(how can I tell her?
How can I express?
How it felt when he came to my room
And helped me to undress
What can she tell me?
How can I believe
That she really didnt hear me cry
When he wouldnt leave? )
Theres a local game where they whisper my shame
They say he gave her his child
He wouldnt give her his name
They will torture me from january till september
And soon theres going to be another unwanted number
Unwanted number
Unwanted number
And I will give my love to another unwanted number
Unwanted number
Unwanted number
song performed by by Elvis Costello
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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I Like That Too
You know I can't stop trying being more for you.
And wanting to be every part of the life,
You live too.
With you with me,
I feel this selfishness.
As if I want to protect you...
In a possessiveness,
You would wish I'd give...
As you do.
And I am not resisting it,
If it shows.
You know I can't stop trying being more for you.
And wanting to be every part of the life,
You live too.
With you with me,
I feel this selfishness.
As if I want to protect you...
In a possessiveness,
You would wish I'd give...
As you do.
And I am not resisting it,
If it shows.
Okay...
You want me to be the one to go first?
Since you are the more submissive!
Just let me know when you get tired of it.
I like it when you are dominate.
And this I know,
I will not come to miss.
When you are aggressive,
It gives me a boost.
A lift!
'I was just about to say I like that too.
About you!
When we do it.'
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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