Don't Let My Confidence Offend

Please,
Don't let my confidence offend.
I did not always place my steps,
With such self assurance.
And when I first met my own arrogance,
Even I became overwhelmed...
With the flaunting of it.

My experiences and indifferences from others,
Witnessed.
Did this to me.
And when I discovered my own identity,
Well...
People were quick to abandon my honesty.
And so difficult it was for me to let them go.

Please,
Don't let my confidence offend.
I did not always place my steps,
With such self assurance.
And when I first met my own arrogance,
Even I became overwhelmed...
With the flaunting of it.

However...
Becoming use to it I've done.
You don't have to.
And this I completely understand if you don't.
But compensating where I am for you?
To show it can be done at your satisfaction?
Is not going to happen. Period. With no explanation!

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Did It Just to Prove

If I could...
Most likely I wouldn't.
And if I did it just to prove to you,
What is needed to be done...
I did to do for show to tell,
Attached to limitation.
And trapped within your manipulation,
Is exactly what that is.

No comfort comes to me,
Or appears.
And my peace of mind,
Was not earned that way at all.
It came to me by accident...
When I stopped making attempts,
To reinvent intentions meant...
That would come to test the strength,
Of my identity.

And easily I now see how that is done.
Insecurities like that I have overcome.
When fingers snap I neither come nor run!
I saunter.
To satisfy my curiousity!
Label it arrogance or confidence if you wish.
My steps are placed where they are and when...
If that is my decision to so choose.
And that is the most refreshing aspect of my life.
To know my own capabilities.

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No Matter What The Tactics Used

No one can be chased away from their self confidence.
No matter what the tactics used...
To show them to be full of themselves with ego.

One who survives being attacted for their appearance,
And identity...
To then crawl to their feet from being on their knees,
Literally and emotionally...
Those looking will rarely find,
Someone like this...
Hiding behind their discomforts to complain.

And any and all mistreatments are remembered to motivate,
Those achievements shown to be believed...
To those unfamiliar with the sight of accomplishment.
Those with a self confidence,
Are quick to show...
And not embellish from their lips to express.
Aware they are of where to place their footsteps.

No one can be chased away from their self confidence.
People like this are determined to succeed.
No matter where they are to ensure the act is done.
And...
No matter what the tactics used to address,
What they have been taught to learn to do at their best.

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Conceited

You try too hard to deal with me.
Don't.
My basic approach reflects a complexity.
I know this!
And I can understand,
Why you believe there is much more to me.
But there isn't.

Between you and me...
I will admit this!
Sssshhh...
Come closer!
I am a victim of my own brilliance!
YES!

However,
You did not hear that from me,
Okay?

If it was discovered I had 'that' much confidence...
People would mistake my arrogance for pride.
And I much rather have them believe I am conceited.
Contrived and full of myself.

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If I Offend, So Be It

If I offend...
So be it!

I am not here,
To be the 'next' James Baldwin.
Or follow in the footsteps,
Of Langston Hughes.
The shoes I wear are quite comfortable.
And the path I walk upon,
Has not already been paved.
That is the task that has be laid before me.
To do that myself!

If I offend...
So be it!

I am not living my life intending to be anyone else,
Than who I am.
I am the first Lawrence S. Pertillar.
And make no mistake about it...
I will be acknowledged,
For the life I've lived.

If I offend...
So be it!

I just know who it is I am.
And I am not who I am because I seek to get paid for it!
Like most folks lost and deluded,
By the meaning of 'identity'.
I've been blessed and I am grateful...
To have a dignity as well.

And 'if' I offend...
So be it!
There's so many others,
Who have minds associated with making a quick buck.
And people like that...
Are indoctrinated with corrupted agendas!

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On Top of Earth I Will Stroll

I wish someone would stop me,
And ask me why I peacock.
As if I am not suppose to flaunt,
My pride and dignity.

Only those threatened by arrogance,
Should evaluated the keeping...
Of their own insecurities.
Instead of proclaiming to be,
One who is down to Earth.

If I am not beneath it yet,
On top of Earth I will stroll.
With a flaunting done,
Undaunted.

No time do I spend,
Competing to defend...
Or understanding weaknesses,
I have taken time from myself to rid.

I've learned how to stroll,
And be bold with the doing.
Arrogance?
I don't take time to define the doing of it.
Or do I attempt to comprehend,
Why people spend most of their lives...
With their noses in the business of others.

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Niccolo Machiavelli

When you disarm the people, you commence to offend them and show that you distrust them either through cowardice or lack of confidence, and both of these opinions generate hatred.

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Underlying the whole scheme of civilization is the confidence men have in each other, confidence in their integrity, confidence in their honesty, confidence in their future.

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Action in Inaction, understand Inaction in Action

Alas..
My own difference and lack of confidence,
Or may be unwillingness,
May be negligence or may be indifference,
Accompanied with laziness says..
I Won't Do it or I can't do it..! ! ! `

My own necessities,
My own requirements,
my own thoughts and motives compel me to say,
I Want to Do It`:

My own self assessment,
My own speculations,
My own gained confidence, Shaken by unknown fears, or expectations of unknown consequences
say,
I Can't Do It`

My own jovial and casual nature,
Mixed with curiosity and self interest,
My own desire to survive say,
I Will Try To Do It`:

My own ignorance,
My own insufficient knowledge,
Insufficient experience
Incompetent attitude say,
How Do I Do It`

My own self,
my own interests,
My own confidence
My love and necessities say,
I Can Do It..
My own determination,
My own will power,
My own arrogance,
My own decision My own preparedness
say,
I Will Do It..

And the result is...
Yes.. I Did It..! ! !

Each day If I move towards,
Infinite self or the bigger self in me,
The gigantic and potential selfless doer in me,
I love Him and believe in his guidance,
no need of those steps above mentioned,
Only work without ambitions,
Action in inaction,
Inaction in action is understood well!

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Confidence

(words & music by tepper - bennett)
When everyone thought the world was flat
Columbus said its round
He went down in history
And america was found
cause
He had confidence
A little thing called confidence
Theres no job too immense when youve got
Confidence
With a c and an o and an n and an f
And an I and a d and an ence
Put em all together and what have you got
Confidence
Youll be surprised what you can do
If you will only try
Remember the tortoise and the hare
Who had that famous race
The speedy hare wound up nowhere
And slow poke took first place
cause
He had confidence
A little thing called confidence
Theres no job too immense when youve got
Confidence
Youll be surprised what you can do
If you will only try
How do you know that you cant ride a rainbow in the sky
Youll be surprised what you can do
If you will only try
All you need is confidence
A little thing called confidence
Theres no job too immense when youve got
Confidence
With a c and an o and an n and an f
And an I and a d and an ence
Put em all together and what have you got
Confidence
Confi ..... confi .... confidence

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Confidence

Not easily refined or defined,
Is confidence.
Nor is it cropped to pluck,
Off from a Sun drenched vine.
To slowly savor for the flavor.

Confidence is a development.
A work in progess.
Not recited from studied print.
Nor listening as lectured...
From a podium will convince,
The taking of notes...
Will provoke it into existence.

Confidence,
Similar to experience...
Is something done,
That is seldom pleasant...
When it comes as a personal delivery.
And...
Most times arrogance is misrepresented for it.

However,
It does take obedience and strength to listen.
To then comprehend that failure does not mean to stop,
To yield and repeat flops.
As a sign that ambition obtained has been dropped.
No,
It does not!

Caution perhaps,
To proceed at your own risk.
But confidence does not allow obstacles to prevent,
Progress.
Or the jumping over hurdles.
Since each hurdle cleared...
Removes the fear to face another.

Clarifying anyone's doubt about confidence adopted!

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Swagger

With a walk of pride,
And heads held high.
Displaying a confidence seen and undenied.
Some come to think of this still as arrogance.
Anyone appearing dignified and proud,
With an identity that speaks out loud...
And arrogance is applied to this stride that clouds,
Today's definition

Swagger is what that is called today.

In my day...
In times that seem so far away.
To act as if one was a foolish clown...
Was one who was down to Earth.
And had been taught this was acceptable,
With a teaching of this from one's birth.
Being a fool was preferred behavior.
In cycles where dysfunctions were revered.

Many times I was told I wasn't a bag of chips.
But easily spotted as a dim-witted dip!
To display one's intelligence...
Was for some an embarrassment.

Today...
Those 'dips' done by the ones with wit,
Appear to have a lot of emulated swagger.
With a hip-hop that raps and rocks!

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I Am Going to Throw My Arrogance Around

You may think this distasteful,
And I can care less.
But I am going to throw my arrogance around.
With a pulchritude that is peacocked.
Like a rooster doing goose steps.
And swimming like a swan,
On my own fresh water pond.
Why?
Because that's what I choose to do.
You?
Can take a hike or fly a kite!
Like I said...
I can care less.
I am going to throw my arrogance around.
And guess what?
Not even seek your approval.

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Faith is the confidence, the assurance, the enforcing truth, the knowing.

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If One Smiling Looks out of Place

Why do you smile now all the time?
It looks out of place.
Especially around those,
Adorning exposed frowns on their faces.

'I've found a different approach to reveal my bitterness.
I have discovered this way expresses my agitation.
And if anyone is offended,
They would have to ask themselves why this offends? '

It does not offend as much as it just looks out of place.

'Well...
Don't you think that is a sad commentary to make?
If one smiling looks out of place...
That should irritate everyone as to what it is they find important.'

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C.S. Lewis

Say your prayers in a garden early, ignoring stead¬fastly the dew, the birds and the flowers, and you will come away overwhelmed by its freshness and joy; go there in order to be overwhelmed and, after a certain age, nine times out of ten nothing will happen to you.

C.S. Lewis in The Four LovesReport problemRelated quotes
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There can be no great courage where there is no confidence or assurance, and half the battle is in the conviction that we can do what we undertake.

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From Safe But Yet Inquisitive Distances

Once a fresh new fragrance has been sniffed...
By those accustomed to experiencing,
A life adventured and explored!
It is understood how some can become overwhelmed.
If their steps have been hesitant in debate...
As a discussion takes place,
To uncover the benefits of something shown.
Instead of partaking in the unknown...
From safe,
But yet inquisitive distances!

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Role Tape Please

There was a time in my life,
I would dare not offend anyone.
Although there were those,
Who seemed to have been addicted to it.

Role tape please!
Thank you.

Today...
Scenes have changed.
A seriousness took place in my life.
And I felt I had to over emphasize...
An offending done at my expense,
Was downsized not to exist.
I don't like it one bit!

And yet my return of it...
Is swift with an purpose connected,
As directed.

There was a time in my life,
I would dare not offend anyone.
But these days...
An asking for it,
Gets a quick delivery!

And...
Cut.

I will do my own editing from now on.

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The Fight Of Your Life.

Getting ready for the fight of your life. The pressure is on. And you must be dynamite. Shine like never before. An insatiable appetite. No holding back. The thunder from my hands will be felt miles away. This is my last shot. And i shall falter not. Its life or death. Its without mercy. No pity for those who cant do for themselves. Revel in it. Its arrogance or confidence. Take your pick. I'm a royal prick. I'm a *ssh*le and a d*ck. But I'm living. Their comes a time when you must put the past behind. Three steps forward, two steps back. Always under attack. Well come I'm ready for the fight of my life. What ever it takes. Make or break. My will is strong. I know where i belong. Protecting them is over. I shouldered those burdens for way to long. Take a picture, savor this moment. For I'm ready for the fight of my life. Trying to predict the ending. Futile efforts. Betting on sh*t deals. Destroying what isn't real. It was never their. So now most despair and are not prepared. But I'm aware of what has to be done. Its not gonna all be fun. But im still ready for the fight of my life. Live and let live. So hard to forgive. Breaking so many ethical boundaries, all at once. Renouncing all claims. I want no parts of it. Your loss. Your cost. Substituting one bad habit for another. It wont happen again. No more friends cause I'm getting ready for the fight of my life. It will be the fight of my life and i must do it alone.

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The More It Is Understood

The more I comprehend where I stand,
The more it is understood...
How my stances taken can offend.
And since I am not one to be defensive,
I can perceive why it is believed...
My strength is interpreted to be arrogance.
Since I am not one to be limited to definitions,
With a searching in my mind to find them.

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