Magic
Fear, anger, mistrust and nearly
Half a century of
Living in a world unfamiliar
To all but myself-
Has left me in dismay and in solitude-
Tomorrow is another day where
My morning shall be
Walking in the darkness, although
Moments away from sunrise and
Knowing that within a few hours
As I sleep- my mind shall become aware-
As if lightening has struck in some
Magical way-Fear, anger and
Mistrust shall disappear in a moment’s notice-
A different sort of sun shall rise
For me alone, shining light upon my kaleidoscopic world-
Black skies transform to cobalt blue as
A hurricane of sorts shall blow the sinister clouds away-
I shall see a rainbow rise from
Behind mountains of madness and
As the moon in its fullness disappears behind
Blossoming trees and I regain my sanity and hope,
Those alien voices shall be silenced-
Fear, anger and mistrust are hiding deep inside of a phantasmal river,
Rapidly receding and it shall only be days before
That river overflows and washes over me,
I can see those dismal clouds returning-
And all I can do is to remember words of wisdom telling me to
Grasp firmly onto those fleeting feelings of peace, hope and
Focus on the clarity of the skies above-
Feelings are so like thunderclouds- and
Finding one’s rainbow is a rarity- when lightening has struck your mind-
When feelings of fear and rage are inborn-
One never knows when the rain shall begin to fall again-
Voices that I hear are not real, and all I can do is dream
While the rain is falling until lightening strikes again-
Skies clear and although skies of cobalt blue so magnificent
Are in passing as is that phantasmal river before it overflows-
Perhaps in a different light it shall wash my tears away and hope shall remain, that
That magical sun shall someday rise for me alone and never set…
poem by Claudia Krizay
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Searching
The sky is raining teardrops-
Although the sky is a deep shade of cerulean blue-
The mountains reflect the color of the sky, and as
The sun is trying to rise above mountains of uncertainty-
I walk a never ending pathway leading to nowhere,
I fear the world that the sky rains upon and
These teardrops falling from the sky
Intermesh with the tears emanating from my heart that bleeds
Pain, confusion and terrifying madness
I feel as someone's hand is reaching out from the sky to taunt me, as
Eyes are seemingly staring from the creek that runs beside me-
Although dread is tearing my body and mind apart,
Robbing me of my flagging grasp on reality, -
I keep walking steadily upon that pathway, though seemingly void of direction.
The sky is raining teardrops-
Teardrops that could be falling from the depths of my soul-
I fear the world, inside which I could soon be drowning in a river of tears,
But I keep walking that pathway that I fear could be leading to nowhere.
I can see people walking before me-
People nobody else can see, and
I listen to voices calling my name-
Voices that only I can hear, and
That hand that reaches from the sky that taunts me,
Most likely, only I can feel.
As frightening as these intruding contacts can be-
They are my close and familiar friends, especially
When this world is spinning out of control,
The sun has risen above mountains of madness and
Is burning my spirit, inside and outside-
The path I walk is blocked by fallen branches of barren trees and while
I stumble over rocks- I shall keep walking this pathway,
Although I do not know where it leads to-
Teardrops fall from my eyes and from the cotton-like clouds that decorate the sky,
My life is a struggle day in and day out-In this life I have yet to find my destination-
I could end my life drowning in a river of abyss, however
I shall keep on walking this mysterious pathway until
I find my place in this world- this world of vast and endless possibilities-
The sun beats down upon me searing my flesh and my spirit, as
I weep tears of frustration and anger-
Somewhere though I believe there is a place for me and
I shall continue walking this pathway-even though I foresee no end or direction
I shall keep walking as I look upward toward the sky of cobalt blue and
Those magnificent cotton-like clouds, giving me hope and direction
Until I discover my own dream, as far away as it may be.
poem by Claudia Krizay
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Where Darkness Prevails
Outside my window- only darkness prevails and inside my bedroom
Shadows flutter about the walls-
Light has evaded every corner, the floors, and the ceiling and I know that
Even though my thoughts, misconstrued inside my own mind and
Yesterday seems as an eternity passed-
I never have been able to perceive what tomorrow may bring-
As I lie here in bleak darkness I hold onto the present moment
As it was a string to a kite
Ready to escape and disappear into the heavens-
Voices I can hear are none but a figment of my imagination and
Shadows have become ghosts that are threats to my existence-
It seemed as if none but a few hours ago- My spirit, lithe and free,
Had much hope for what tomorrow would bring and
Somehow that hope has vanished in the darkness-
Leaving me alone, terrified and trusting none but
The thoughts that run rampant inside of me-
Life is a mystery to me and how
The sun, a rainbow and laughter can turn to
Rain pouring from the darkest clouds in the universe,
And inside of my mind
That feeling of freedom and happiness has transformed to
Mistrust, anger and my grasp onto reality, flagging?
If I could only find a star in this prevailing darkness
That lurks outside my window I could wish upon that star for
Rejuvenation of peace and hope for a future –I would-
But now I hear torrents of rain falling outside that could just as well be
Tears from angel’s fury and betrayal?
The moon is full on this night and inside the world of my reflections
As old tales have declared- if I were to dance outside
Beneath the moon on this night, my sanity would be lost
In a gust of wind and my sprit would be reborn in another world,
Lithe and free as could be- in some other dimension, place and time
There would be a sun that would rise for me alone-
Time has evaded me and I believe I am holding onto that kite’s string
Soaring upward in the sky living for none but the present moment
Ready to escape and disappear into the heavens- where
Darkness has become none but a delusion?
poem by Claudia Krizay
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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My Destiny
Once I alleged there would be a
Destiny for me and
I would think of a tree bearing leaves
Unfolding in the springtime that would
Only touch the sky if clouds were dense as
Thunderclouds, perhaps-
Dark as fear and ominous- If fate would allow
I would reach upward on a solitary walk
At the dawning of each day and touch the sky
Before the sun came out from hiding from behind cragged mountains-
At daybreak a few stars still being visible-
I would wish upon one remaining star- My destiny being to
Find a safe place for myself in this world? Clouds so dense and dark-
As deceiving as promises made by those I once believed in
Before lightening would strike and thunder would clap
Would deceive me and their ghostly spirits still haunt me as
Wind would blow down that tree
That never touched the sky because this wind had blown and
Lightening struck it down?
If I could I would be a tree that
In the event of never touching the sky and being the victim of a storm
It would not matter because a tree
Cannot feel the pain of deception, fear and mistrust?
I would live my life as a tree blossoming every spring,
Leaves unfolding and then changing colors in the autumn-
Always beautiful to see but
Not knowing the depth of sorrow felt or the
Agony of loss even after having fallen-
Only because God did not give it a soul?
The sun shall rise over the mountains as the full moon
Bids the night farewell- before light succumbs the darkness,
I shall wish upon a star and if the stars are obliterated by clouds so dark and ominous-
I shall try to be thankful for my soul that was God-given- that
I can feel love and appreciation of all that is beautiful-
Even if all the people in this world slight, hurt and betray me-
I can appreciate the glory of the rising sun and adore the splendor of nature-
I still have myself and even if lightening were to strike me dead,
My soul shall live on forever….
poem by Claudia Krizay
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Destiny
Once I alleged there would be a
Destiny for me and
I would think of a tree bearing leaves
Unfolding in the springtime that would
Only touch the sky if clouds were dense as
Thunderclouds, perhaps-
Dark as fear and ominous- If fate would allow
I would reach upward on a solitary walk
At the dawning of each day and touch the sky
Before the sun came out from hiding from behind cragged mountains-
At daybreak a few stars still being visible-
I would wish upon one remaining star- My destiny being to
Find a safe place for myself in this world? Clouds so dense and dark-
As deceiving as promises made by those I once believed in
Before lightening would strike and thunder would clap
Would deceive me and their ghostly spirits still haunt me as
Wind would blow down that tree
That never touched the sky because this wind had blown and
Lightening struck it down?
If I could I would be a tree that
In the event of never touching the sky and being the victim of a storm
It would not matter because a tree
Cannot feel the pain of deception, fear and mistrust?
I would live my life as a tree blossoming every spring,
Leaves unfolding and then changing colors in the autumn-
Always beautiful to see but
Not knowing the depth of sorrow felt or the
Agony of loss even after having fallen-
Only because God did not give it a soul?
The sun shall rise over the mountains as the full moon
Bids the night farewell- before light succumbs the darkness,
I shall wish upon a star and if the stars are obliterated by clouds so dark and ominous-
I shall try to be thankful for my soul that was God-given- that
I can feel love and appreciation of all that is beautiful-
Even if all the people in this world slight, hurt and betray me-
I can appreciate the glory of the rising sun and adore the splendor of nature-
I still have myself and even if lightening were to strike me dead,
My soul shall live on forever….
Claudia Krizay
poem by Claudia Krizay
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Creation
Shades of cerulean blue are outstanding in the very early morning’s sky-
Darkness is fading as the sun awakens-
The moon was full last night, though still peering through the trees-
Reddish-orange foliage almost glowing as would a bonfire,
The tips of its flames touching the cumulus clouds, ever so gently- and
Ever so tenderly caressing the last star as it fades into the cosmos;
To my longing soul’s content, autumn has arrived and
I kick aside the colorful fallen leaves, as
I leisurely walk in my solitude, my thoughts as a nightingale on wings,
Begin in flight of my imagination;
In my mind’s eye, I am building a cabin in the center of the woodlands,
Losing myself inside the world of my dreams-
In the center of my delusions I am the last person alive on this planet
Accompanied only by the deer, and birds hovering about-
Colorfully contrasting with the sky-
I listen with care to voices only I can hear-
Once terrorizing me, ordering me to take my life have transformed to
Hymns of splendor and radiance, carrying me away to another universe-
I remember the days when the sounds of car engines roaring,
Angry voices shouting and days of never abating,
gray skies with thunder clapping
While lightening struck as rain would fall- I was locked inside
Chambers of madness and confusion-
Though now I have escaped and
have cut the rope that once tied me to grim reality-
I know now that I have found myself and have abandoned the world that
Once had me trapped inside a kingdom of fear and sadness-
I am finding myself surrounded by the beauty of the forest
My tears have been carried downstream and
I can laugh with the sun as it appears from behind the mountains-
I am alone, but never lonely being in union with nature, though
The center of my own foundation-
Tonight the moon shall rise in its fullness once again and
My fantasies shall follow the path of comets and shooting stars
As I have lost myself inside the world of my thoughts for an eternity,
Darkness is fading- darkness of the world of my past apparition
And my own sun awaits me as I have unlocked the gate to the
Peaceable world of my creation, only to move forward and
Never to look behind…
poem by Claudia Krizay
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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The Essence of my Dreams
Losing myself in flight on an early summer's morning-
In flight, unaware of the direction-
Unaware of the time of day, I know that
I don't believe in heaven anymore-
In flight above deep blue mountains-
But not weary of the sun's rays attacking me-
Never touching the sun and
Never finding my rainbow,
A myriad of colors are painting the sky-
Though only inside the world of my imagination.
Losing myself in flight and wondering-
If I will ever find safety and peace of mind here in the sky,
Amongst the scattered clouds that surround me-
I could hide behind a cloud to escape reality-
Reality that has become none but a threat to my existence.
Within the figment of my imagination-
I have wings that carry me high above the mountains,
Above the treetops and the ocean turning green as
Its waves lap against the shore-
A multitude of colors are decorating the land below-
Trees are never green but violet in their hue and
That ocean- green but never blue as are the mountains-
In flight I am losing myself in so many different ways-
Separating myself from the world into which I was born-
My mind is creating visions of far away places and
Inside the fortress of my mind, God has given me wings to fly with,
Although I do not believe in heaven-
Within moments I find myself lying upon the ground-
The sky, cloud covered as rain begins to pour down upon me-
I am a lost, lone, and confused spirit-
Threatened by sounds of cars speeding up and down the road behind me-
And people shouting while thunder claps and lightening strikes.
Voices inside of mind are commanding me
To lift my wings and take flight once again-
However I am trapped, being unable to fly, my wings having been phantasmal-
Though inside my dreams I can swim the ocean, searching for safety and familiarity-
Perhaps I shall find myself an island amongst the sea-
But alas only in my dreams-
And perhaps the rain shall stop falling and a rainbow shall rise above the mountains-
Inside the world of my thoughts I shall paint the sky blue and cloudless,
Lift my wings and soar back into the sky and look down-
Down at this world where I have always wished to escape from-
Happiness shall be found within the world of my imagination-
Violet hued trees - their branches swaying in the wind
May someday give me shade as I close my eyes and dream,
Then I shall burst into song, in chorus with the voices inside my mind-
I have peace of mind now knowing I can be anyplace I can fathom-
Because I am a person who though never believed in heaven-
Strongly believes in the essence of my dreams…
poem by Claudia Krizay
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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The Magical Land of My Dreams
A silver key has locked me inside my own world, where I have
Lost myself inside the shadows of my dreams-
As would a thundercloud, my tears are like the rain that falls-
The sky would clear and as the sun would re-emerge,
Perhaps there is some levity inside this place of my reverie-
Having lost my soul and my spirit following close behind as a
Fledgling bird may have flown by within a moments notice,
I hear the ticking of a clock rhythmically keeping time to
The motion of my steps slowly walking away from
The confusion, fear, and destitution of veracity-
I am none but a silhouette slipping through a crack in the door
Leading to this place of my flight of the imagination-
I have lost myself along the way I once believed was paved for me alone,
Though only lead me towards madness
And to a world so vast, frightening and unfamiliar-
Running backward down that very same path until I arrived at
That mystifying door that was open for me alone,
That door only I could enter with that magical silver key,
I could hear the songs of angels singing tunes of love, peace and faith-
Stepping with caution over the threshold of that door,
As I closed it gently but firmly behind me-
Here inside this place where there are no hills and trees grow
With leaves of silver and a creek runs through in all of its crystalline clarity-
The sun here is just bright enough to guide me down a
Path of hope- and the people in this place are not threatening and
Are true to their word, innocuous, caring and promising that
Here tears are golden and only shed for joy-
No room for sadness, disappointment and fear in this miraculous land,
This magnificent place where I have been reborn-
I own a silver key and a special paintbrush with which I have painted
A rainbow across a sky of cerulean blue- along with phantasmal seraphs
With unyielding strength I have pushed all clouds away.
I listen to the joyous tunes of cherubs’ singing- I can see the reflection of
Peace flowers dancing in a cool breeze before the sapphire-hued pond-
My spirit and soul I once believed lost has been found here-
I have locked the door between myself and what so many have deemed as reality
With that phantasmal silver key and thrown it to the wind.
So many have believed that painted rainbows, crystalline creeks and ponds of sapphire-
Songs of angels and trees bearing leaves of silver
Are none but figments of my imagination- I have in a sense lost myself
Inside a world of my delusions but having abandoned fear, sadness and dismay-
This new found peace of mind has become my new reality –as that silver key is
Blowing about in the wind somewhere, some place a long distance upward in the sky-
I know I am safe here inside the shadows of my dreams- knowing that
All clouds have disappeared, my tears
Which have fallen with the rain of past days, are forever gone…
poem by Claudia Krizay
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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The Magical World of My Dreams
A silver key has locked me inside my own world, where I have
Lost myself inside the shadows of my dreams-
As would a thundercloud, my tears are like the rain that falls-
The sky would clear and as the sun would re-emerge,
Perhaps there is some levity inside this place of my reverie-
Having lost my soul and my spirit following close behind as a
Fledgling bird may have flown by within a moments notice,
I hear the ticking of a clock rhythmically keeping time to
The motion of my steps slowly walking away from
The confusion, fear, and destitution of veracity-
I am none but a silhouette slipping through a crack in the door
Leading to this place of my flight of the imagination-
I have lost myself along the way I once believed was paved for me alone,
Though only lead me towards madness
And to a world so vast, frightening and unfamiliar-
Running backward down that very same path until I arrived at
That mystifying door that was open for me alone,
That door only I could enter with that magical silver key,
I could hear the songs of angels singing tunes of love, peace and faith-
Stepping with caution over the threshold of that door,
As I closed it gently but firmly behind me-
Here inside this place where there are no hills and trees grow
With leaves of silver and a creek runs through in all of its crystalline clarity-
The sun here is just bright enough to guide me down a
Path of hope- and the people in this place are not threatening and
Are true to their word, innocuous, caring and promising that
Here tears are golden and only shed for joy-
No room for sadness, disappointment and fear in this miraculous land,
This magnificent place where I have been reborn-
I own a silver key and a special paintbrush with which I have painted
A rainbow across a sky of cerulean blue- along with phantasmal seraphs
With unyielding strength I have pushed all clouds away.
I listen to the joyous tunes of cherubs’ singing- I can see the reflection of
Peace flowers dancing in a cool breeze before the sapphire-hued pond-
My spirit and soul I once believed lost has been found here-
I have locked the door between myself and what so many have deemed as reality
With that phantasmal silver key and thrown it to the wind.
So many have believed that painted rainbows, crystalline creeks and ponds of sapphire-
Songs of angels and trees bearing leaves of silver
Are none but figments of my imagination- I have in a sense lost myself
Inside a world of my delusions but having abandoned fear, sadness and dismay-
This new found peace of mind has become my new reality –as that silver key is
Blowing about in the wind somewhere, some place a long distance upward in the sky-
I know I am safe here inside the shadows of my dreams- knowing that
All clouds have disappeared, my tears
Which have fallen with the rain of past days, are forever gone…
poem by Claudia Krizay
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Life in Fear
Lost in a dream world, far beyond veracity-
Seated cross-legged upon a wooden beamed floor-
I pray to the Goddess, the savior of my spirit
Fabricated in a moment, although lost and forgotten-
Now I speak only to the people who live
Beyond the mountains, purple in their hue-
Dancing beneath the magical rain falling from
The loveliness of crimson clouds-
Melodious voices ring out as they
Enchantingly obliterate the demons of my past and present-
An expressive smile creeps up upon my face-
Finally I have been liberated-
As a ghost-like shadow eradicates the light,
I feel the presence of faltering footsteps
Pounding the floors-
Loudening voices resonate throughout the confinement of this room:
“I am coming to take you away-“
I feel a firm grip of a stranger’s hand upon my shoulder as
A metal cuff locks about my wrist-
I feel my body somehow
Disconnected from my mind as I rise to my feet-
Moments later, locked inside the confinement
Of an unfamiliar vehicle-
Blaring sirens exacerbate my fear-
In this moment of terrifying madness
I pray to the goddess, the savior of my spirit-
Crimson clouds transforming to dank, dark fogginess-
I feel a different sort of rain falling-
I have come to realization-
That the demons of my past and present - have returned-
As my soul escapes the confinement of my mind,
Thunder claps while lightening strikes-
There is no magic beyond mountains
No place for dancing and the only voice ringing out now
Vibrant as pounding upon a base drum bellows-
“I have come - to take you away-“
poem by Claudia Krizay
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Blue Skies Bring Tears
Unleash the armageddon
So all the children go to heaven
I sit by quiet still
With their pictures on my eyes
You'll draw the guns your given
Write down the words as written
And never disturb the presense
Of resurrection touch
And it's about time
It's about drawing near
Blue skies bring tears
Blue skies bring tears
Blue skies bring tears
Descend the darkened stairway
Make hate with plastic playmates
And fire out remaining traces
Of your self esteem
Mainline the deepest secrets
Lick clean the dirty fingers
I am a stranger to you
As you are to yourself
And it's about time
It's about fear
Blue skies bring tears
Don't you want me (don't want you)
Cause I await cityside
We'll watch the seas start to die
Blue skies bring tears
Take me inside your body
Blue skies bring tears
Cover me with your soul
Blue skies bring tears
To the darkest reasons
Blue skies bring tears
Is where I wish to go
Blue skies bring tears
You are the sweetest flower
Blue skies bring tears
That I have ever devoured
Blue skies bring tears
I ask for nothing given
Blue skies bring tears
For nothing in return
Blue skies bring tears
Blue skies bring tears
Blue skies bring tears
Blue skies bring tears
Blue skies bring tears
Blue skies bring tears
Blue skies bring tears
Blue skies bring tears
Blue skies bring tears
Blue skies bring tears
Blue skies bring tears
Blue skies bring tears
Blue skies bring tears
Blue skies bring tears
Blue skies bring tears
Blue skies bring tears
song performed by by Smashing Pumpkins from Machina: The Machines Of God
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Sometimes
Sometimes I hear the sound of a bolt of lightening
Strike any tree, and
As I walk through the darkness of day,
I only can envision
A glimpse of hidden sunshine,
A gray cloud covering the tips of the treetops, and
A spotted green snake slithering through the grass that
Blankets the tortuous path I walk every day…
Sometimes I hear the thunder crash, as if
Some lost and troubled angel
Hovering about the black sky above me has
Expressed her inexplicable rage, or
God has angrily snapped his fingers-
Sometimes I see clouds circulating beneath my feet, or
I see hell rising above my head, and
Many times, as I walk along this wooded trail,
The whole world follows me,
Laughing at my thoughts-
An evil eye from heaven focuses on my every move, and
Sometimes I feel myself hanging with a noose about my neck,
Ironically from the most magnificent and statuesque tree
In all of the forest-
When fear overcomes and apprehension about
Tomorrow rolling over the mountains invades my baffled mind,
I try to hide behind the ominously approaching thunderclouds-
God never promised me that I would find a rainbow and
The demons that live inside my mind
Have never promised that they would stop their
Incessant vociferations-
The whole world follows me as tomorrow
Blatantly turns to today-
I stand, but never alone beneath a maple tree,
Capturing each moment as it falls encased inside a
Single raindropp that could have been a tear
Cried for yesterday’s sorrows-
Sometimes when that bolt of lightening strikes,
I quietly whistle a happy tune-
It has been said that music calms the troubled soul, and as
I hide from this frightening world
Beneath the clouds below my feet,
I pray for a touch of heaven to chase
This terrifying world away-
Though God never promised me a
Rainbow or a prayer,
Just a ray of light would be a welcome sight,
To dispel the darkness of this world
That terrorizes me –
Light, love and fear-
What truth-filled words they are…
Claudia Krizay
poem by Claudia Krizay
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Song For Life
I never believed that
I would see the rain fall again
At this moment in time-
I upheld the moon in my hands
On the darkest night of the year-
Today the day is at the spring and
The wind is carrying
Dandelion thistles
Through every moment in time-
I believe I see a cardinal
Perched upon the branch of a
Cherry tree alone-
Singing a song of hope and love-
All I can do is weep only because
I know tomorrow
Rain will come down in a deluge and
My tears will only follow…
I remember the day we met- my true love and I - the rain was
Falling hard and I would
Capture the raindrops in my cupped hands and
Wondering if my tears would fall
In this moment in time-
I would uphold the sun in my hands on
The darkest day of my life-
Never let it loose from my grasp because
I believe that love is tenuous as is
A day with sunshine or
A night when the moon is full-
Cardinal, I say,
Sing me an aria about love that
I shall never forget and
Watch me dance in the rain as my tears fall
Into the pond in the midst of the forest-
Love is none but tenuous and
I have lost my love once more and that is why I weep-
Rainy days are plentiful and so like the loss of amity-
Sing with me and perhaps tomorrow the sun shall rise over the mountains and
My love shall return and rain shall never fall again
And my love will never again abandon me-
Sunlight, moonlight and love-fickle as they may be-
Here we are at the spring and everything is blossoming-
My hope, my life and my tears- never ending-
And my song and my new life has just begun-
In my hand I hold a bouquet of dandelions and as their
Thistles are blown about,
I give my tears away-
I never believed I would see rain fall
Again, in this moment in time-
Of course there is so much I never believed would be true and
As I let the elusive sun from my grasp
Disappear behind mountains of madness-
A rainbow on the horizon,
As beautiful as it may be
Is all the hope that tomorrow may bring-
It is the only hope I have for a future so
I continue my journey and my search for
None but sanity and grace to be bestowed upon me-
Nothing is more tenuous than life-
Not love, not sunshine or moonlight-
So I shall hold on to every element of life-
For without a firm grasp upon life-
Love, light and feelings
Could never exist for a moment in time so
Be thankful to be alive and
Dance in the rain and sing in the darkness and
Be thankful for every moment that
You are alive and never let go-
Not for one moment in time-
poem by Claudia Krizay
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Flight
I have always loved the sky and
Dreamed, not only late at night,
Of life beyond our solar system
Elsewhere in the universe so vast-
Some would say that I envision the sky
Under a different light, as
The sun people worship and fantasize
Around which our planet revolves,
Has been brightly blinding and deceptive-
Inside the world of my thoughts as
Others have deemed as delusions-
Casting rays that are fires from hell,
Illuminating the paths I frantically walk
Trying to escape what is real.
Cerulean blue is the sky at night, and
Cobalt blue at sunrise,
Overshadowed by the dimmer light of the moon at twilight,
Adorned with contrasting cumulous clouds at dawn as
Rare shades of blue magically transform to gold as
The evil sunrises, threatening me-
Although I fear the overwhelmingly dazzling rays of the sun
Aiming towards me as a sort of lethal weapon,
I would still make my journey through and across the universal sky
If I only could- inside the fortress of my mind,
I have created my own universe, with a different sun,
People I could trust and who speak a language
Which only they and I could converse and comprehend- while
There would be no sickness, war or evil to fear.
I have no place upon the familiar planet earth.
I was born under a different star-
I have escaped veracity,
I have become a extraordinary nightingale lifting my wings,
Flying beyond the sun, the moon and past Saturn, Venus and beyond-
Inside the world of my apparition, as I soar further
Away from all that terrifies me
I know that a day shall come that I shall arrive
At my new home, in flesh, not only in spirit-
I have always loved the sky, and
I have always lived, in my own way
As a shadow obliterated by massive crowds of
Those who only wish me harm.
The story of how my body and soul
Shall soon survive and find blissful contentment,
Someplace beyond what they can envision
Is one nobody shall ever hear, as
My thoughts have traveled too many light years away –
One day the sun shall burn out and I may return,
After all of earths’ hellions have vanished-though
I shall never be alone, as I have by my side
Those phantasmal beings of my sorcery-
I hear thunder now and the rain begins to fall, and
I cannot see through the black and ominous clouds-
With much disdain my journey must be postponed as
I watch the rain fall into the ocean,
I find myself drowning inside a different ocean-
That is, an ocean of an abundance of tears, which
I have wept, unashamedly knowing that
Nothing is without hope and I deeply believe
I shall become that extraordinary nightingale someday again soon
Ascending upward, when the sky becomes once again
That distinctive shade of cerulean blue-
I can find my place amongst angels or more simply
Amongst the beings inside of my imaginings and be joyful
And with hope that the sun shall not set my dreams afire,
That the rain shall not begin to fall again,
Someday I shall be contented to be alive,
as a strong, brave and immortal being, while
Never a lost soul or a shadow blackened by the nightmares of my past.
poem by Claudia Krizay
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Pain, hope, anger, Tired, fear, lost.
Pain, hope, anger.
Tired, fear, lost.
the pain within is only our own to bare
the hope is our mind playing tricks on us
the anger is finding there is no life
the tired of being pushed around
the fear of losing
the lost
Pain consumes the world
Hope is lost
anger is held high
Tired always
Fear consumes our minds
Lost is all our hopes
Pain can not beat us
Hope still shines the smallest ray of light
anger is controled
fear minimizes
lost is the feeling of emptyness
The pain wont hold us back
The hope shines the way
The anger can not harm
The fear is gone
The lost is home.
In This Moment
Light is dim
Although in this moment
Light is not a welcome entity-
My mind wants to hide itself
Within the darkness of
This very early summer morning-
In this moment, I foresee no serenity and
I hear voices screaming while
In the fortress of this room
I know I am the only one present.
If only my bed, here where I lay, were a ship, I would journey years backward
To the place I lived in at all times many decades ago-
Now I know that land was non existent, even though
At the time it was my only reality.
In this moment, my only reality is within this room
Where the light is dim and
Outside this window, where the shades are pulled halfway down,
A world surrounds me-a world I cannot call my home.
Here within the place of my thoughts,
There exists a sea cobalt blue in its hue
A sea of tranquility, although it seems as if
All tranquility has just been shattered-
Even though the voices I hear screaming are terrifying and unreal-
The voice of reality is dimmer.
Threatening voices and this bed in which I lie is a boat
Now in the midst of a storm at sea, and although
I can foresee no destiny-here where I lie resting,
All is familiar to me while the real world outside is foreign, and
A threat to my existence.
So here in this moment, I close my eyes to all that I fear and I know that momentarily
I shall drift off to sleep and dream of the past-
Where I lived inside my own world of bliss and harmony-
Here In this very moment where the light of reality is dim,
My eyes are closed and I am sailing upon my magical ship,
Back to the time where fantasy brought me only peace of mind
Unaware of the day I would awaken alive in a planet they call "Earth"
Where my imaginary ship would overturn and I would find myself
Drowning in a sea of madness where there exists no recourse to fear,
In this moment where light has never been dimmer…
poem by Claudia Krizay
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Candle of Hope
Candle of Hope
Lost within space and time,
I am running, as I am
Following the stars before me-
Inside of my mind,
All I can see are moments of madness.
My hair, blowing in the wind, behind me, as I
Dash away from all that I fear,
My thoughts are far away from
Every moment in time,
As I am searching for a ray of hope to hold onto as
None of my dreams have ever
Come true-
If I could light a candle,
Perhaps its flame would guide me towards a miracle-
A miracle of my most promising fantasies becoming reality-
Where the darkness of night
Would transform to the levity of daybreak at sunrise-
I am lost in space and time, where
My world continues to darken-
Life has always been a bizarre journey for me where
Hope has yet to be found-
It is the stars that have given me an increment of light,
Illuminating a pathway before me, to give me
Some small hope that I would awaken
In some other world where
Love, fortune and peace of mind would
Overshadow mistrust and sadness-
I whisper in thought, somewhere in the back of my mind-
Light me a candle with a flame so bright,
That will break through dark clouds of doubt-
Whereby I would be running forward in time,
Finding wealth, joy, and hope never ending
As the flame on that candle
Would burn for an eternity
Only to guide me forward, not backward,
Leaving that life of misfortune behind me-
Claudia Krizay
poem by Claudia Krizay
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Internal Reverie
In the darkness on a starlit night
I lay close to the shore of my memory and imagination-
Waves of anger and recollections of personal injury,
Mistrust and betrayal are flooding over me as
A tidal wave would, splashing tears of hurt and doubt
From my eyes as the moon laughs ridiculing
The fear that has me immobilized-
Starlight is dim as any hope left inside,
The light of the moon, figments of my imagination and
Feelings of rage are overwhelming me as
Rain begins to fall and as raindrops hit the ground I feel an upsurge of emotion-
I cannot control as the starlight becomes dimmer
- Inside my mind a clock is ticking rapidly-
Flight of time is terrifying as the waves of resentment
Splash upon the imaginary shore where I lie-
Lost hope and the pain of self harm induce once hidden fears to resurface-
Ships sailing in an ocean without direction, in the darkness of this starlit night
I would board a ship and search for another destination as
I ride the waves, no land in sight- Overcome by bleak darkness as the moon disappears
Behind the clouds and the rain pours down in torrents,
Blinding me- I never believed there was a god or a heaven,
I never believed in angels singing or
Patron saints that would bring me towards some sort of salvation-
Life has been a tragic musical of which I am the star-
Lost inside my own world from which I was snatched away-
I lived in a world where the sun rose in the very early morning and
People never deceived one another and starlight was bright in
The early evening, into the dawn of the next day-
Waves were gentle, washing over a shore of freedom and
Rain never fell, obliterating my horizon-
I ride my ship into the night as the stars and moon have disappeared-
Waves are closing in on me and I am searching for an island of serenity –
I hear for the first time angels singing their most heartrending melodies-
Perhaps it is only a dream- but in my mind dreams are my only reality as
I can see the stars appearing on the horizon as candles would brighten a
Home on a winter’s night, I keep on riding that ship still trying to find redemption-
Islands of expectation and trust that may appear in my wildest reverie-
In fate and luck I am a believer whether or not a God exists-therefore
Even though light may be dim, a gentle ocean breeze shall
Perhaps carry me towards that island in my fondest dream where
The sun shall appear from behind those clouds of misfortune, which shall
Become none but lost memories of the past, never to reemerge.
Claudia Krizay
poem by Claudia Krizay
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You Told Me
I remember you reading me about
Places beyond the mountains,
Above the trees and behind rainbows-
You told me that skies turned gray here sometimes
And the sound of thunder would
Resonate throughout -
The places I used to run and hide from and
Those places where the skies would at times turn red in hue
Where the light of the sun would bear down
Upon that paranormal pond I so often spoke of-
I had told you about the world I lived in where
Few people lived and cats ran wild while
Trees grew tall to scrape the clouds as
Pink and silver as they reflected in
The course of a running stream that lead
Towards a safe place where I could hide from
That world I so feared where cars ran vicariously-
Clocks ran from nine to five in that world where
Three billion people were known to live-
That world where I had never felt safe at home.
To retreat to the land beyond the mountains and
Behind rainbows-
I told you in those rare moments when I was afraid to speak and
Fearful of everything you deemed as “real”-
I know the world in which you live is real to you and
Although this land of purity, and through my eyes
I saw as safe and majestic-
You told me this was none but a delusion-
I remember living for a short while
In your world, where guns fired, thunder clapped, cars would rush
Carelessly down boulevards and skyscrapers were built
To barely withstand rain, sleet and snow-
In desperation I spread the wings you told me did not exist-
Lifted my body and flew beyond the mountains and the rainbows and far away from
This world so overwhelming and so threatening-
You were the one who read me tales about lands beyond the mountains
And in my mind I found a place behind a rainbow-
And it didn’t matter if it was none but a delusion because-
Through my own eyes, what feels like home,
No matter where the place may be-
Is truly home to me- no matter where its destiny-
You told me the thunder would sound soon and the lightening would strike-
I told you “Never in my world” and if some day I also saw it as a “delusion”
It would not matter because I have found my safe haven here-
Alive and content in this place where I can call myself
Settled and secure,
I would never turn my head to see the rain falling upon
Skyscrapers and cars breaking down on the highway
Early in the morning-
Whether my dream world is real to you or
Just a figment of my imagination in your mind,
It is true to life to me-
That is what matters and
If some day you wish to see what living blissfully encounters-
Climb over that mountain and beyond a rainbow
After a storm-
You shall find me there to
Welcome you and perhaps you also-
Shall never see any turning back, as
What is veracity and what is phantasmal-
Is as has been said-
Is in the eyes of the beholder-
poem by Claudia Krizay
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Reverie
There exists a place within my most vivid dreams where suspicion is unheard of-
Where lack of trust had never shown its evil countenance-
I follow this meandering river beyond
This territory illuminated by daytime stars- without the sun
Shining its orange-hued light upon the path my spirit follows-
The moon, stars, the gilded pond-
Seemingly violet in hue when reflecting the light of the moon at midnight-
I am walking alongside the river of my imaginings
Serpentine and deep in some ways as the
Ubiquitous thoughts and voices only I can hear inside my mind-
This realm of meandering rays of light
I follow and nobody follows me
Safe within my solitude, I am-
Only seraphs paint the sky a pale shade of cerulean-blue
As certain as the flowers are growing alongside the path beside me-
Although today-I am not afraid-
Flowers are non- threatening as they have no souls- and
Those who have no souls can do no harm-
Alive in this land where trees grow upward to reach the sky-
I do not fear:
Yellow blossoms dance in
An early spring zephyr and the trees bow gently
Within a gentle gust of wind-
The light of the moon is dim but magical
Unlike the garish rays of the sun-
Alone inside this place of my reverie, I am-
I see my reflection in the crystal clarity of
A pond of azure-blue reflecting the starlight-
Safe inside the world of my delusiveness-
Separate from humanity, I have escaped far beyond the mountains rising behind me as
The cloud cover bars me from reality-
Here inside my own small world protected by the ramparts of nature-
I am alive and jovial- I am not afraid-
Just happy to be singing my own songs and to be speaking my own voice-
With nothing to fear- alone, and content to be alive inside this land of my dreams-
Just to be watching the sun set behind the mountains as darkness overshadows-
I am not afraid…
poem by Claudia Krizay
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Water My Thirsty Soul
Can the rain fall from cloudless skies
Can your tears fall from hardened eyes
I cried out to the Lord, in my time of need
I prayed for the rain, my soul to feed
And my God, who is never far away
Opened up His heart as He listened to me pray
And from heaven on high He sent down the rain
There's a river of grace that's gonna wash away the pain
And out of my heart flows a river so deep
My once dry eyes they now continually weep
And everywhere the river flows there's grace from above
And everyone it touches they are filled with His love
This rain that falls, it falls from endless blue skies
It fills my empty heart and falls down from my eyes
The Lord Himself sent down the rain from above
And now the cloudless skies are filled with clouds of His love
So if it's rain your looking for, this moment, today
Wont you fall down on your knees and cry out and pray
The Lord of every rain dropp that falls down from above
Will sweep you down the river to an ocean of love
This ocean is boundless, its forever and a day
And in this sea of beauty you will hear the Lord say
I am the Father's tears that was shed from above
And I will carry you home across this ocean of love
poem by Frank McEleny
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