Humor results when society says you can't scratch certain things in public, but they itch in public.
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Itch and Scratch
You’re just like an itch
that keeps coming back.
Every time I itch
I have to scratch, scratch, scratch.
Just like a train
on a railroad track
You go away today
and tomorrow come back.
Try taking an aeroplane
instead of a car,
then hop on a rocket
to a distant star.
You’re just like an itch
that keeps coming back.
Every time I itch
I have to scratch, scratch, scratch.
And just like an itch
you’ve got under my skin,
this is a situation
that I just can’t win.
Please give me a break
and get off my back.
Get out of here
and don’t come back.
You’re just like an itch
that keeps coming back.
Every time I itch
I have to scratch, scratch, scratch.
poem by Orlando Belo
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Itch, Itch, Itch
should it not annoy me
what comes from single addition sound
itch, itch, itch
scratching my finger point
my heart is like free market
my brain is like full garbage
itch, itch, itch
there's worm army in my back
I get itch in my leg
itch, itch, itch
it's an itch in my mouth
I have sharpen my nail
I want to jump and scream
can I come to scratch you into pieces
the hands that touch me impolitely
the blunt mind that speaks empty
itch, itch, itch
you are just itch for me
poem by Maria Sudibyo
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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I Scratch Therefore I Am
i scratch therefore
i am
a cat.....
(a tomcat
or a tiger on the loose of a safari in your mind)
you itch therefore
you are
a dog....(or a bitch
or a fungus in the
anus)
you itch and i scratch
therefore
we exist,
therefore
we are.
animates, needing something to thrive upon,
we evolve and get complicated, we revolve around something
and get a little
sophisticated,
we scratch some more, we itch some more,
no longer cats, or tigers, or dogs or bitches, we go beyond
these animated needs,
we somehow say
we need love this time...
poem by Ric S. Bastasa
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Scratch My Back
(words & music by giant - baum - kaye)
One good turn deserves another
Be my love, Ill be your lover
Its all part of natures laws
If youll scratch my back then Ill scratch yours.
If youll scratch my back then Ill scratch your back
Like two peas in a pack, lets get rid of our itch together, hmm
Joy they say is in the giving
Come on give, make life worth living
Your welfare is my concern
Do a favour for me, Ill do one in return
If youll scratch my back then Ill scratch your back
Like two peas in a pack, lets get rid of our itch together, hmm
Scratch me now a little lower
What a feeling do it slower
Thats it, hmm youre getting hot
Well I gotta admit, you just hit the spot
If youll scratch my back then Ill scratch your back
Like two peas in a pack, lets get rid of our itch together, hmm
If youll scratch my back then Ill scratch your back
song performed by by Elvis Presley
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Millions of public workers have become a kind of privileged new class - a new elite, who live better than their private sector counterparts. Public servants have become the public's masters. No wonder the public is upset.
quote by Mortimer Zuckerman
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Public Animal #9
Me and G.B.
We ain't never gonna confess
We cheated at the math test
We carved some dirty words in our desk
Well now it's time for recess
Old man waitin by the monkey bars
Tradin all his ball cards
And they promised him a gold star
And they told him he could go far
Hey Mr. Bluelegs
Where are you takin me?
I'm like a lifer
In the state penitentiary
If I keep my nose clean
I won't get my eyes shined
But I'm proud to be
Public Animal Number Nine
License plates are runnin
Out of my ears
I'd give a month of cigarettes
For just a couple of lousy beers
Or even a bottle of
Real cheap wi-hine
But that's the price you pay to be
Public Animal Number Nine, Number Nine
Hey Mrs. Cranston
Where are you takin me?
I feel like a lifer
In the state penitentiary
She wanted an Einstein
But she got a Frankenstein
Yeah, I'm proud to be
Public Animal Number Niiiirrrrrgh
Public Animal Number Nine
Public Animal Number Nine
Public Animal Number Nine Nine
Public Animal Number Nine Number Nine
Number Nine Number Nine
Number, Number Nine Animal Number Nine
Public Animal Number Nine Nine
Public Animal Numbergh Niiiirrrrrgh
Public Animal Nurrrgh Nirrrgh
Errrrrrrrrrrrgh
Public Animal Number Ni-yine
Public Animal Number Ni-yine
Public Animal Number Number Nine Nine
Public Animal Naaaaaaaagh
song performed by by Alice Cooper
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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I think that the public is in and the public is in big, and the public is not, I don't think going to pull out because the public knows what I said about 1987.
quote by Jim Cramer
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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The public library is a center of public happiness first, of public education next.
quote by John Cotton Dana
Submitted by Micheleflowerbomb
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We've had public hearings. We've had interim reports, which our statute has encouraged us to provide to the public. We have brought the public along with us, trying to make as much available as possible over time.
quote by Richard Ben Veniste
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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My focus and that of all members of the Government responsible for delivering services to the public is to make sure that the public sector can use all the skills it needs to do the job the public wants it to do.
quote by Estelle Morris
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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In view of our public pledges, we public officials can never again go before the public merely promising election reform. The time for promises is past.
quote by Charles Edison
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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I believe if a private citizen is able to affect public opinion in a constructive way he doesn't have to be an elected public servant to perform a public service.
quote by Warren Beatty
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Mutual Itch One Lonely Night
this mutual each we have
one lonely night
when the moon sails in the
black sky
and the stars are too near
like lilies to the sailboat
on the placid lake,
i scratch my itch
you scratch yours
but what about our backs
those parts that i cannot reach
and you cannot reach
too
we follow the natural law
i'll scratch your back
and you scratch mine
no more no less
we are just
but friends,
tonight
poem by Ric S. Bastasa
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Speak of things public to the public, but of things lofty and secret only to the loftiest and most private of your friends. Hay to the ox and sugar to the parrot.
quote by Johannes Trithemius (1488)
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Petulance
Quit the public office first
If you want to be petulant.
If you show your petulancy
It is dangerous for the country.
Public officers are on the chair
Only for the general public.
And adulation is to
Give aside.
poem by Gajanan Mishra
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The American public highly overrates its sense of humor. We're great belly laughers and prat fallers, but we never really did have a real sense of humor. Not satire anyway. … When we realize finally that we aren't God's given children, we'll understand satire. Humor is really laughing off a hurt, grinning at misery.
quote by Bill Mauldin
Submitted by Veronica Serbanoiu
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The public! the public! how many fools does it require to make the public?
quote by Thomas Chalmers
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Several things about Reagan are unusual in a public man. He was not a typical politician at all, but a private man in public life.
quote by Lyn Nofziger
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Society as a whole is better off when information is available to the public. Whether you are talking about how to prevent disease, or about who does the best job of treating disease, it is useful to provide as much information to the public as possible.
quote by David Obey
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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I propose a Constitutional Amendment providing that, if any public official, elected or appointed, at any level of government, is caught lying to any member of the public for any reason, the punishment shall be death by public hanging.
quote by L. Neil Smith
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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