Also, if you watch the film once, there are lots of things that you won't get because there are punch lines in the first act, the setup to which isn't until the second act.
quote by Simon Pegg
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Related quotes
The Worst Joke Ever
You see there's this cat burglar who can't see in the dark.
He lays his bets on 8 more lives, walks into a bar.
Slips on the 8 ball, falls on his knife.
Says, "I don't know what I've done, but it doesn't feel right!"
Some things don't hold up over the course of a lifetime,
When's the first time you heard that one, 1954?
Get to the punch line. fall to the floor.
Give me a minute and I'll tell you the setup for
The worst joke ever, I never
I'll tell you my version of the greatest life story
Don't bore me
Now I am floating,
I feel released.
The moorings have been dropped,
The weights unleashed.
Everything is crystalline, simple and free.
The crime of good men who can't wrestle with change,
Or are too afraid to face this life's misjudged unknowns
You're not hurting anybody else's chances,
But you're disfiguring your own.
Give me a minute and I'll tell you the setup for
The worst joke ever, I never
I'll tell you my version of the greatest life story
Don't bore me, I NEVER
Give me a minute and I'll tell you the setup
You see there's this feeling that I've heard this one before
song performed by by REM
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Punch & Judy
(fish / marillion)
Punch
Punch and judy
Punch and judy
Punch and judy
Washing machine, pinstripe dream
Stripped the gloss from a beauty queen
Punch and judy, judy
Found our nest, in the daily express
Met the vicar in a holy vest
Punch and judy
Punch and judy
Brought up the children church of e
Now I vegetate with a colour tv
Worst ever thing that ever happened to me
Oh, for d.i.v.o.r.c.e.
Oh judy
Whatever happened to pillow fights
Whatever happened to jeans so tight, friday nights
Whatever happened to lovers lane
Whatever happened to passion games
Sunday walks in the pouring rain
Punch
Punch
Punch and judy
Punch and judy
Punch and judy
Punch
Punch
Punch and judy
Punch and judy
Punch and judy
Curling tongs, mogadons, I got a headache baby, dont take so long
Single beds, middle age dread
Losing the war in the waistlands spread
Who left the cap of the toothpaste tube
Who forgot to flush the loo
Leave your sweaty socks outside the door
Dont walk across my polished floor, oh judy
Whatever happened to morning smiles
Whatever happened to wicked wiles, permissive styles
Whatever happened to twinkling eyes
Whatever happened to hard fast drives
Complements on unnatural size
Punch
Punch
Punch and judy
Punch and judy
Punch and judy
Punch
Punch
Punch and judy
Punch and judy
Punch and judy
Propping up a bar, family car
Sweating out a mortgage as a balding clerk
Punch and judy, judy
World war three, suburbanshee
Just slip her these pills and Ill be free.
No more judy
Judy, judy no more!
Goodbye judy!
song performed by by Marillion
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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But in film you always watch situations or stories that you really have no relation to. A lot of times just because there's no personal connection doesn't mean you can't connect with the film or the characters in the film.
quote by Jay Hernandez
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Beaten To The Punch
You say that you can and then you run to get your mummy
And youre almost beaten to the punch
Looking for the man who sold you the dummy
And youre almost beaten to the punch
Laughing at the older guys who say its just as well
Saved by the wedding bell
Almost beaten to the punch
Youre looking for somebody new that you can knock around
You are almost beaten to the punch
If youve got a head for figures then youd better count me out
You were almost beaten to the punch
You pulled the piece but you soon called it love
You go hand in glove
Almost beaten to the punch
Your body speaks much louder than your voice
You let it do the talking so I dont have any choice
Now you find the younger guys are putting up resistance
And youre almost beaten to the punch
You better get out now because youll never go the distance
And youre almost beaten to the punch
Youll find a girl and youll promise her anything
Even a wedding ring
Almost beaten to the punch
song performed by by Elvis Costello
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A lot of times I watch TV and I watch film and there's so many things I'd love to talk about that I feel don't get the opportunity to be shown. Sometimes things become very stereotypical and one-sided, and I feel like it's such a colorful world.
quote by Alicia Keys
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No Time
By hank cicalo
Hober reeber sabasoben
Hobaseeba snick
Seeberraber hobosoben
What did you expect?
No time, no time for you.
I got no time, baby,
Got lots of better things to do.
Runnin from the risin heat
To find a place to hide,
The grass is always greener
Growin on the other side.
No time, no time for you
I got no time, baby,
Got lots of better things to do.
[instrumental riff]
No time, no time for you
I got no time, baby,
Got lots of better things to do.
[instrumental riff]
No time, no time for you
I got no time, baby,
Got lots of better things to do.
Tryin to tell the world
Somehow of how I feel.
Tell me what you said again,
I cant believe its real.
No time, no time for you
I got no time, baby,
Got lots of better things to do.
Andy, youre a dandy,
You dont seem to make no sense.
Nevermind the furthermore,
The plea is self-defense
No time, no time for you
I got no time, baby,
Got lots of better things to do.
Got no time
I got no time
[repeat, adlib and fade]
song performed by by Monkees
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Gignol
Addict of Punch and Judy shows
I was when I was small;
My kiddy laughter, I suppose,
Rang louder than them all.
The Judge with banter I would bait,
The Copper was a wretch;
But oh how I would hiss my hate
For grim Jack Ketch.
Although a grandsire grey I still
Love Punch and Judy shows,
And with my toddlers help to fill
Enthusiastic rows.
How jolly is their mirth to see,
And what a sigh they fetch,
When Punch begs to be shown and he
Jerks up Jack Ketch.
Heigh ho! No more I watch the play;
It is the audience
That gives me my delight today,--
Such charm of innocence!
Immortal mimes! It seems to me,
Could I re-live my span,
With gusto I would like to be
A Punch and Judy Man.
poem by Robert William Service
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I think the original Matrix was really incredible. It was so original and it did so many innovative things with film. It was a much bigger film. Bound was just a smaller film. It was kind of like an old noir film.
quote by Gina Gershon
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I've done lots of songs for film soundtracks and things like that - stuff I'm not ashamed of, but that doesn't represent my legacy with the Pretenders.
quote by Chrissie Hynde
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I was probably the best that ever walked this earth. And I could take a punch. I could deliver a punch. I didn't have the hardest punch in the world but my punches were sharp and they were crisp. And if you took too many of them, you would be knocked out.
quote by Larry Holmes
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Punch And Judy
Gather 'round!)
Punch and Judy did it truly and were married in a haste
In love, maybe, using the baby as a kind of romance paste
She's grown fatter, her hair cut shorter, looks much older than nineteen
He's a drinker not a thinker, baby spoiled his could have been
This must be make-believe
This must be make-believe
This must be make-believe
'Cos who do we know, dear, who acts like that?
oh oh oh oh!
Punch and Judy
Punch and Judy in a semi on a brand new council plot
Sunday lunchtime, beer-for-Punch time, while his dinner's far from hot
She grows tired, cab is hired, she goes round to see her friend
He comes back late, fool is irate, we will see his temperament
Punch and Judy in a quandary, she's walked out and he is mad
Now he's grown up, can't smash home up, retribution must be had
Punch and Judy had a baby who brought them to married bliss
Mr Punch has drunken hunch that he must punish kid for this
Punch and Judy
song performed by by Xtc
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Punch And Judy
Gather 'round!)
Punch and Judy did it truly and were married in a haste
In love, maybe, using the baby as a kind of romance paste
She's grown fatter, her hair cut shorter, looks much older than nineteen
He's a drinker not a thinker, baby spoiled his could have been
This must be make-believe
This must be make-believe
This must be make-believe
'Cos who do we know, dear, who acts like that?
oh oh oh oh!
Punch and Judy
Punch and Judy in a semi on a brand new council plot
Sunday lunchtime, beer-for-Punch time, while his dinner's far from hot
She grows tired, cab is hired, she goes round to see her friend
He comes back late, fool is irate, we will see his temperament
Punch and Judy in a quandary, she's walked out and he is mad
Now he's grown up, can't smash home up, retribution must be had
Punch and Judy had a baby who brought them to married bliss
Mr Punch has drunken hunch that he must punish kid for this
Punch and Judy
song performed by by Xtc
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Prom Night
This is a murder I wrote
Prom night hearts racing
Anticipating the memories to last a lifetime
But not this time
It was all setup
From the time we bought the tux
No turning back now
I held your hand and walked you in
And now the plan begins
It starts with punch
A drink made just for you
Then a dance
Now you don't stand a chance
It's over now
Your eyes have closed for the last time
I won't cry tonight
Watching you put up a fight
Puts a smile on my face
You were always viewed as a disgrace
poem by Isaac Spradlin
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5. A Punch-up
Punch and Judy always fighting
Crocodile is always biting
Baby crying Punch looks rough
Judy says she’s had enough
She leaves Punch to baby mind
He’s lost baby cannot find
Searching high and searching low
Punch thinks Judy mustn’t know
Judy’s back she had a hunch
With a stick she batters Punch
Policeman comes to stop the fighting
Sausages the croc is biting
Punch arrested took to jail
Judy searching starts to wail
Baby found beneath a bush
Fast asleep a little hush
Judy goes back to the station
Told the police with much elation
Punch released it made him smile
Till he got chased home by the crocodile
poem by David Threadgold (2008)
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Make Sure The Camera Is On Your Best Side
I once had it said to my face
That I did not 'act' right
Therefore that person made a decision
To ignore me
The one walking up to me
To tell me this to my face
And that's why they have not been around
If I should be concerned with worry
As to the absence of their presence
This 'has' got to be a setup of some kind
No one is that stupid
To walk up to someone to tell them
They have been ignored and for what reasons
This 'has' to be a new approach to inflicting humiliation!
I began to feel extremely uncomfortable
Because I knew right then
Someone was hired to tape my reactio
And I was not dressed to impress
To be captured on film!
Not to appear to laugh for no reason
Blackmail material?
That's what I thought
If I was going to be filmed
I was not going to look the part of a fool
So I walked away slowly
As if I did not hear one word that was said
Hoping the cameras were fixed on my left side
My left profile is better to capture on film
My acting friends always say
'Make sure the camera is on your best side'
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
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I was delighted to have lines when they came - learning lines for film isn't a problem, but television is a little different, because we shot those shows the whole way through.
quote by David Selby
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I'm just one of those people that if I sit down to watch a horror film, I put my hands over my face and I cry a lot and I don't see half of the film because I'm too upset.
quote by Neve Campbell
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I'm a big movie fan. After a show, if I'm on the bus or a plane, it's often hard to get to sleep, so I'll watch a film. An action film can even relax me.
quote by Garth Brooks
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She Is Electric
Shes electric
Shes in a family full of eccentrics
She done things I never expected
And I need more time
Shes got a sister
And God only knows how Ive missed her
On the palm of her hand is a blister
And I need more time
And I want you to know
Ive got my mind made up now
But I need more time
And I want you to say
Do you know what Im saying?
But I need more ....
Coz Ill be you and youll be me
Theres lots and lots for us to see
Theres lots and lots for us to do
She is electric, can I be electric too?
Shes got a brother
We dont get on with one another
But I quite fancy her mother
And I think that she likes me
Shes got a cousin
In fact shes got bout a dozen
Shes got one in the oven
But its nothing to do with me
And I want you to know
Ive got my mind made up now
But I need more time
And I want you to say
Do you know what Im saying?
But I need more ....
Coz Ill be you and youll be me
Theres lots and lots for us to see
Theres lots and lots for us to do
She is electric, can I be electric too?
song performed by by Oasis
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My War
My war is about to Start
One Punch can Start it
a War of Anger
War of Madness
War of Revenge
War of Fully-Hated
a Rapid Punch of Over-Madness
Punch of Revenge for Embarrassment
Punch of Totally-Hated
Punch of Firing Anger
My Heart Beats with On Mercy
a Heartbeat of Non-Contentment
Beat of No Feeling
Beat for my Foolish Enemy
The Beat for My Angry-Mad Heart
For The revenge of My War
poem by Jesse Marlou Padro
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