What's the two things they tell you are healthiest to eat? Chicken and fish. You know what you should do? Combine them, eat a penguin.
quote by Dave Attell
Submitted by Lucian Velea
Vote! | Copy!
Related quotes
Penguin Paradise
Each penguin's such a precious thing,
Content to honk all day!
Each wide-webbed foot, each floppy wing,
To them, they're quite OK.
The water's cold! They walk on ice!
Do you hear them complain?
To them, this place is Paradise!
They say, 'No p.p.p.pain, no g.g.g.gain! '
You won't catch me in ice cold sea
And gobbling ice cold fish!
They'd soon lose all their novelty -
They're not the ideal dish...
The easy life, that's all I want -
Not fish day in, day out...
My choice in every restaurant!
Yes, that's what life's about!
And central heating suits me fine
And clothes and jewels, too...
Some champagne or some fancy wine
And then I'll muddle through.
But fish, fish, fish would drive me mad!
I'd soon curl up my lips!
With no potatoes to be had,
There'd be no fish and chips!
No telly and no radio,
No papers to peruse...
Live as a penguin? No, thank you!
This human life I'd choose...
poem by Denis Martindale
Submitted by Poetry Lover
Vote! | Copy!
Penguin Paradice
Each penguin's such a precious thing,
Content to honk all day!
Each wide-webbed foot, each floppy wing,
To them, they're quite OK.
The water's cold! They walk on ice!
Do you hear them complain?
To them, this place is Paradise!
They say, 'No p.p.p.pain, no g.g.g.gain! '
You won't catch me in ice cold sea
And gobbling ice cold fish!
They'd soon lose all their novelty -
They're not the ideal dish...
The easy life, that's all I want -
Not fish day in, day out...
My choice in every restaurant!
Yes, that's what life's about!
And central heating suits me fine
And clothes and jewels, too...
Some champagne or some fancy wine
And then I'll muddle through.
But fish, fish, fish would drive me mad!
I'd soon curl up my lips!
With no potatoes to be had,
There'd be no fish and chips!
No telly and no radio,
No papers to peruse...
Live as a penguin? No, thank you!
This human life I'd choose...
poem by Denis Martindale
Submitted by Poetry Lover
Vote! | Copy!
Varied Menu
Chicken and rice.
Fish and rice.
Rice and chicken.
Rice and fish.
Varied menu - 'ish!
Nice jungle place.
There's plenty of space.
Fresh clean air
But that dietary pair,
Fish or chicken
.....Not again!
So more trekking with a frown
Back to Georgetown.....
poem by George BernardBloodyShaw
Submitted by Poetry Lover
Vote! | Copy!
A Daft Crackpot
Parky the penguin felt so low,
He didn’t really like the snow,
Or the blustery winds that blow
Across his icy world.
Parky the penguin thought that he
Would find a boat and go to sea,
He needed to be wild and free,
Gone from his icy world.
Parky the penguin sailed away,
Spotted a sunny sandy bay,
Where he could laze around all day.
Unlike his icy world.
Parky the penguin got so hot,
And could not find one shady spot,
He knew he was a daft crackpot,
Leaving his icy world.
Parky the penguin hitched a ride,
On a tiny raft, narrow not wide,
And reaching home, had verified,
He’d missed his icy world.
Parky the penguin hugged his Mum,
Then skidded off upon his tum,
His escapade was not humdrum,
Nor was his icy world.
poem by Ernestine Northover
Submitted by Poetry Lover
Vote! | Copy!
The Death of a Planet
The ocean waves crash along the shore
Its deep, gloomy depths hold
untold stories,
untold tragedies
Far away,
miles and miles along.
A 30ft wave submerges
a melting glacier
Penguins and fish alike swim away
to escape
the treacherous ship.
Polluting the water with oil
Pulling up pounds and pounds,
tons and tons
Of fish every day
Neither aquatic life,
nor penguins are safe
From the monstrosity
of human kind.
A mother and father penguin
get caught in a net,
tangle
and die.
Their baby now has to
fend for himself
But
with the shortage of fish,
with the fish gone
He does not
have enough energy
To swim back
to shore
The poor, innocent baby penguin
gets tired
And begins
to drown
Everything goes black
He is dying…
dying…..
gone
poem by Helena Dombrowski
Submitted by Poetry Lover
Vote! | Copy!
I only eat fish - no chicken, no turkey, just fish. I get all my protein from fish and egg whites.
quote by Jack LaLanne
Submitted by Lucian Velea
Vote! | Copy!
Is this chicken, what I have, or is this fish? I know it's tuna, but it says 'Chicken of the Sea.'
quote by Jessica Simpson
Submitted by Lucian Velea
Vote! | Copy!
Self reliance
A sparrow in swiftness, an eagle in hovering,
Or a seagull in glides is not what a penguin is.
To flitter or flutter too, the penguin is not aspiring.
Envious not of others’ skill, she lives sanguinely.
15.09.2000, Pakmd
poem by Rm. Shanmugam Chettiar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
Vote! | Copy!
Pierre The Penquin
'I have just been swimming to catch my fish. I have 3, I love fish it is absolutely delicious, I don’t want them cooked, I can’t see the sense in that, I will eat them raw one by one and savor every bite. They are cold and slippery to slide down my throat. I will eat my fish first, then I might go for another swim, or I might go for a snooze for a while.'
Who knows?
Pierre the penguin has just been swimming,
to catch his evening meal.
He does not need a boat for this,
or a rod or reel.
He can swim very fast,
and catch his fish quite easily.
Pierre is well equipped for this,
has you all can see.
He has a flipper on each leg,
that makes him very strong.
So, when he goes swimming,
he can stay out there quite long.
The fish are cold and slippery,
to slide down Pierre's throat.
The oil in the fish,
gives Pierre his lovely coat.
After his meal,
he might go for another swim,
or he might go for a snooze.
Which one do you think,
Pierre, should really choose?
poem by Pamela lutwyche
Submitted by Poetry Lover
Vote! | Copy!
Crow Black Chicken
(laurence wilson)
Well, I went on the mountain
And I gave my horn a blow
Thought I heard some purty gal say
Yonder come my beau
Crow black chicken and crow for a day
Crow black chicken and fly away
Crow black chicken and-a ...
I like chicken pie
Well, the hardest work that ever I done
Is plowin a field of rye
The easiest work that ever I done
Was eatin chicken pie
Chicken crow for midnight
And chicken crow for a day
Along come an owl, lord, have mercy
And stole my chicken away
song performed by by Ry Cooder
Submitted by Lucian Velea
Vote! | Copy!
So
So, what's it gonna' be...
I waited patiently, stubby pencil in hand.
'...chicken or fish? '
She was planning a dinner party, the magnificent woman-
'Um...um...why not both? Oh, and we need some candles...put those down.'
'ok...both, ' I wrote, 'chicken and fish. Who are these people you're inviting?
'Just a bunch of diplomats. Oh, and flowers, but I'll get those.'
'Diplomats? What kind? ' I inquired, idly.
'I don't know, yet. Whatever's not on sale. But there's only one kind of diplomat. You'd best be going. They'll be here in six hours.'
I rose to go.
'And the salad? ' I remembered.
'What about it? , she asked, tying on an apron.
'What kind? '
'Mista.'
'Yes, sir, ' I saluted, and left.
poem by Morgan Michaels
Submitted by Poetry Lover
Vote! | Copy!
The Penguin
I've seen the beautiful penguin
And what a sight it is!
It's very cute, you're bound to grin -
It's next to perfect bliss!
The way it waddles side-to-side,
Its webbed feet on the go
And at full throttle, open wide,
It still moves kinda slow...
It reminds me of a beaver,
The water is its home,
Yet it likes to take a breather,
As onward it would roam...
It's virgin white on waiter black,
A costume ready-made...
The water's surface starts to crack -
It dives in unafraid!
I'd like to stroke a penguin's front
To see if penguins smile...
I've not been on a penguin hunt
In quite a long, long while!
It must be great to have such fun,
To swim and swirl below,
Inside wet water, 'neath the sun,
Fluorescent, all aglow!
Forget about a Teddy Bear!
Its fur is way too rough!
I'd rather be at home and share
A penguin I could love...
poem by Denis Martindale
Submitted by Poetry Lover
Vote! | Copy!
Ode to Chickens
An Ode to Chickens
Oh chicken, oh chicken,
With orange little feet,
All white and fluffy,
So good to eat,
Oh chicken, oh chicken,
I will get you so fat,
Then I will kill you,
And eat you at last
poem by Trevor Cummins
Submitted by Poetry Lover
Vote! | Copy!
It makes me mad when I go to all the trouble of having Marta cook up about a hundred drumsticks, then the guy at the Marineland says, 'You can't throw chicken to the dolphins. They eat fish.' Sure they eat fish, if that's all you give them. Man, wise up.
Jack Handey in Deep Thoughts
Submitted by Lucian Velea
Vote! | Copy!
31
A fish that drinks like a fish, that is a fish in excess
A fish that fishes in troubled waters, that is a fish taking advantage of another fish in trouble
A fish that fishes or cuts bait, well, to be or not to be, to retreat or to attack, that is the fishy question
A fish that is neither fish nor fowl, is a fish that is neither one nor the other, lacking some convictions
A fish out of water, is a fish feeling left out, no longer in his accustomed environment
Do you have other fish to fry for now?
Is there other matter requiring my attention?
Poor fish,
the lake is finally fished out from his fishy mind.
poem by Ric S. Bastasa
Submitted by Poetry Lover
Vote! | Copy!
Some things that can happen with a fish
A fish that drinks like a fish, that is a fish in excess
A fish that fishes in troubled waters, that is a fish taking advantage of another fish in trouble
A fish that fishes or cuts bait, well, to be or not to be, to retreat or to attack, that is the fishy question
A fish that is neither fish nor fowl, is a fish that is neither one nor the other, lacking some convictions
A fish out of water, is a fish feeling left out, no longer in his accustomed environment
Do you have other fish to fry for now?
Is there other matter requiring my attention?
Poor fish,
the lake is finally fished out from his fishy mind.
poem by Ric S. Bastasa
Submitted by Poetry Lover
Vote! | Copy!
Ode To Orange Chgicken
Orange chicken, oh orange chicken,
how much I love you.
You're sweet, sticky, and tangy, all at the same time,
you go great wi th soy sauce, but never with lime.
ode to orange chicken, which I love to devour,
it's been in my mouth so often, it knows that i have power.
It knows the names of my taste buds, Jill, Lil, and Bill,
sometimes the orange chicken is happy, but sometimes it's held against it's will.
Whenever I eat orange chicken, it goes CRUNCH, CRUNCH,
and I have to have chow mein, and that goes MUCH, MUNCH!
Ode to orange chicken, it is always in a bowl,
but did I mention, i also love eggrolls.
poem by Aubrey Harmel
Submitted by Poetry Lover
Vote! | Copy!
Chicken Hearted
(bill justis)
My girlfriend slipped and fell
Now she's hanging from a cliff
I can't come to her rescue
But these flowers i must sniff
You see i'd really like to save her
But i aint got the nerve
I'm chicken hearted
I'm chicken hearted
I'm tryin' to kiss my girl
And it makes me want to faint
I'm scared of my own shadow
And afraid of what i ain't
I've no inspiration
I'm kinda yellow...
I'm chicken hearted,
I'm chicken hearted
Mama's in the workshop
Daddy's in the jail
I seem to be afraid
To go to work and make their bail
I guess my folks will have to stay there
Cos i'm just like a snail
I'm chicken hearted,
I'm chicken hearted
song performed by by Roy Orbison
Submitted by Lucian Velea
Vote! | Copy!
Vegetarian Mumbo Jumbo
I dont want tofu Id rather have a mouthful of beef stew I dont want
To be a vegetarian why eat beans when you can have steak insted?
I dont feel bad about eating something thats dead why should I be
Sad for cows getting hit in the head? so I like eating fish tell me whats
Wrong with this how can you blame me for eating chicken of the sea?
Dont waste your breath yelling at me about animal rights and how they
Should be free its survival of the fittest and were winning I dont feel
Bad about eating something thats dead why should I be sad for chickens
Being force fed so I like eating fish tell me whats wrong with this how can
You blame me for eating chicken of the sea?
song performed by by NOFX
Submitted by Lucian Velea
Vote! | Copy!
Silly; Cats: I Have A Treat For A Black Cat
Black cat why do you run?
I want to have some fun.
Let me pet you.
Let me get you
some fish on toasted bun.
Fish you don't like you say?
What else would make your day?
Some beef perhaps?
Some chicken scraps?
I'll help you have your way.
When you finish your meal
I'll make with you a deal.
Come visit me
and I will see
next time you'll have some veal.
Then together we'll play;
for some toys I will pay.
Then you may nap
upon my lap.
I'll care for you O.K.?
We'll be not all alone.
Each other we shall 'own'.
At night I'll sleep
while watch you keep,
in our bed by the phone.
(10-22-2006)
poem by Bri Edwards
Submitted by Poetry Lover
Vote! | Copy!