Never slap a man who chews tobacco.
quote by Willard Scott
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Ned’s Delicate Way
Ned knew I was short of tobacco one day,
And that I was too proud to ask for it;
He hated such pride, but his delicate way
Forbade him to take me to task for it.
I loathed to be cadging tobacco from Ned,
But, when I was just on the brink of it;
‘I’ve got a new brand of tobacco”, he said –
“Try a smoke, and let’s know what you think of it.”
poem by Henry Lawson
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Slap That Bass
Zoom zoom zoom zoom
The world is in a mess
With politics and taxes
And people grinding axes
Theres no happiness
Zoom zoom zoom zoom
Rhythm lead your ace
The future doesnt fret me
If I can only get me
Someone to slap that bass
Happiness is not a riddle
When Im listening to that
Big bass fiddle
Slap that bass
Slap it till its dizzy
Slap that bass
Keep the rhythm busy
Zoom zoom zoom
Misery, youve got to go
Slap that bass
Use it like a tonic
Slap that bass
Keep your philharmonic
Zoom zoom zoom
And the milk and honeyll flow
Dictators would be better off
If they zoom zoom now and then
Today, you can see that the happiest men
All got rhythm
In which case
If you want a bauble
Slap that bass
Slap away your trouble
Learn to zoom zoom zoom
Slap that bass
(bridge)
Dictators would be better off
If they zoom zoom now and then
Today, you can see that the happiest men
All got rhythm
In which case
If you want a bauble
Slap that bass
Slap away your trouble
Learn to zoom zoom zoom
Slap that bass
Zoom zoom zoom zoom
Zoom zoom zoom zoom
Zoom zoom zoom zoom
song performed by by Ella Fitzgerald
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Agony
And in spoonful oil
Kitchen is busy frying
Mustard and lentils two tablespoons each
And chillies hundred grams
And a pack of cigar or raw tobacco
In added two tablespoons of oil
Then to grind with lemon size tamarind, salt
To make tobacco chutney
And the water soaked tobacco
Kitchen is busy grinding
With salt and cashews handful
To make balls, be deep fried in oil
Be added to a masala tomato puree
To make tobacco kofta curry
And to the cooked rice
Kitchen is busy seasoning
With fried clove, cardamom, and cinnamon
Onion and ginger-garlic paste, salt
Sauted well with flavoured tobacco
Then to garnish with cut cigar pieces
To make tobacco biryani
Tobacco chutney, tobacco curry
Tobacco biryani..what next..
Forgotten Kitchen hurrying
To make more koftas
Be put in sugar syrup
To make tobacco jamuns
Then you see, exhausted Kitchen
Under the wildly running fan rests
Wildly coughing out
Her heart despite its rapidness
Awaiting patiently her lover
Who's been chained to her delicious cooking
poem by Indira Renganathan
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It is time for Congress to provide relief for tobacco farmers. Since the 1930's tobacco production has been regulated by a quota system, which required farmers to purchase quota in order to grow tobacco.
quote by Allen Boyd
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Losing the war of tobacco..
Losing the war of tobacco..
I'm losing the war that has consumed my life.
Tobacco is my war that I fight along side
Tobacco is in the life I live in
Tobacco is the war I'm losing
Tobacco has consumed my life
poem by Joe Johnson
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The Goat And I
Each sunny day upon my way
A goat I pass;
He has a beard of silver grey,
A bell of brass.
And all the while I am in sight
He seems to muse,
And stares at me with all his might
And chews and chews.
Upon the hill so thymy sweet
With joy of Spring,
He hails me with a tiny bleat
Of welcoming.
Though half the globe is drenched with blood
And cities flare,
Contentedly he chews the cud
And does not care.
Oh gentle friend, I know not what
Your age may be,
But of my years I'd give the lot
Yet left to me,
To chew a thistle and not choke,
But bright of eye
Gaze at the old world-weary bloke
Who hobbles by.
Alas! though bards make verse sublime,
And lines to quote,
It takes a fool like me to rhyme
About a goat.
poem by Robert William Service
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Tobacco
The Indian weed, withered quite,
Green at noon, cut down at night,
Shows thy decay; all flesh is hay,
Thus thinke, then drinke tobacco.
The pipe that is so lily-white,
Shows thee to be a mortal wight;
And even such, gone with a touch,
Thus thinke, then drinke tobacco.
And when the smoke ascends on high,
Thinke thou beholdest the vanity
Of worldly stuffe, gone with a puffe,
Thus thinke, then drinke tobacco.
And when the pipe grows foul within,
Think on thy soule defil'd with sin,
And then the fire it doth require.
Thus thinke, then drinke tobacco.
The ashes that are left behind,
May serve to put thee still in mind,
That unto dust return thou must.
Thus thinke, then drinke tobacco.
poem by George Wither
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There's nothing quite like tobacco: it's the passion of decent folk, and whoever lives without tobacco doesn't deserve to live.
Fundamental of Liar Chapter XXXVII: Portion
there's man who gets big portion
then eats it without thinking
there's man who chews it slowly
and manage himself with that portion
there's man who wastes his portion
or saves for someone
but there's man who keeps it for himself
and with greedy heart wanting more
there's man who gets small portion
then eats it with pleasure
there's man who chews it slowly
and try to satisfy himself with that portion
there's man who doesn't touch it
so the others can taste it
but there's man who empties it
and without ashamed keep asking more
poem by Maria Sudibyo
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I checked out all types of tobacco trying to find one that would be easiest to live with, I ended up using pipe tobacco. It burned slower, and it wasn't as harsh on my throat... It also smelled better.
quote by David Strathairn
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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No matter what Aristotle and the Philosophers say, nothing is equal to tobacco; it's the passion of the well-bred, and he who lives without tobacco lives a life not worth living.
Sure, it is apparent that presidents are looking at polls, but they are also stepping up on issues. President Clinton stepped up on tobacco. He shaped the polls on the tobacco issue.
quote by Donna Shalala
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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I'm glad now, at age 66, that I never used alcohol or tobacco... I've buried a lot of friends who used tobacco or alcohol.
quote by Jerry Falwell
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Enemies
In the puddle of sweat
Stuck up the humid heart
Waiting to be fanned mercy
Hissing in bright day
Sometimes added sissing
Awake at night like in day..
Power of the government fails
Five hours per day
An order out of the way..
Mr.PC otherwise soft
Often becomes hard dark mirrored
Berating my better half slapped him one day
Wonder, he resumed
Slap, slap, slap
Habituated myself no sooner
Just to send Mr.PC to his hospital
Mr.PC communicates well
But lets not out any abc of his heart
Impaired old age difficult to be repaired
Old we versus old Mr.PC
The repairer's laughing..you too?
poem by Indira Renganathan
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Don't You Hear Jerusalem Moan
Don't You Hear Jerusalem Moan
Don't you hear Jerusalem moan?
Don't never let a chicken get big enough to crow
Don't you hear Jerusalem moan?
Don't you hear Jerusalem moan?
Don't you hear Jerusalem moan?
Thank God there's a heaven and a ringing in my soul and my soul's got free
Don't you hear Jerusalem moan?
Well a hard-shell preacher you can tell him how he do
Well he chews his own tobacco and he drinks his own brew.
Well a Baptist preacher you can tell him by his coat
Has a bottle in his pocket that he can't hardly tote
Well a Cambellite preacher his soul is saved
Well he has to be baptized every other day
Well the Holy Roller preacher he sure is a sight
Well he gets em all a-rolling and he kicks out the light
Well the Presbyterian preacher he lives in town
His neck's so stiff he can't hardly look around.
song performed by by Nitty Gritty Dirt Band
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Lawyer
When the jury files in to deliver a verdict after weeks of direct and cross examinations, hot clashes
of lawyers and cool decisions of the judge,
There are points of high silence--twiddling of thumbs is at an end--bailiffs near cuspidors take fresh
chews of tobacco and wait--and the clock has a chance for its ticking to be heard.
A lawyer for the defense clears his throat and holds himself ready if the word is "Guilty" to enter
motion for a new trial, speaking in a soft voice, speaking in a voice slightly colored with bitter wrongs
mingled with monumental patience, speaking with mythic Atlas shoulders of many preposterous,
unjust circumstances.
poem by Carl Sandburg
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But there is no withdrawal, but with tobacco there is terrible withdrawal, it is almost impossible for a lot of people. I did , I went cold turkey, they never had any patches in those days but grass was not difficult, alcohol not difficult, but tobacco - oh my god.
quote by Larry Hagman
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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The Leaf
The Leaf.
On my walks I picked up a perfectly formed elm leaf,
the colour of dry tobacco. In Norway, during the Nazi
occupation, people had tobacco plants in back yards.
Perhaps carrots and cabbage had been healthier.
Put the leaf on top of a white wall and took a picture.
The wind came and blew it away. I brief meeting of
equals and a memory
poem by Oskar Hansen
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Come Sirrah Jack Ho
Come sirrah Jack ho,
Fill some tobacco,
Bring a wire and some fire,
Haste haste away,
quick I say,
do not stay,
shun delay,
for I drank none good today.
I swear that this tobacco
Is perfect Trinidad-o;
By the very very Mass,
never never was
better gear
than is here,
by the rood,
for the blood,
it is very very good,
'tis very good.
poem by Thomas Weelkes
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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