Men who consistently leave the toilet seat up secretly want women to get up to go the bathroom in the middle of the night and fall in.
quote by Rita Rudner
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Related quotes
Isn’t it annoying when women don’t put the toilet seat back up when they’re finished?
Ştefan Munteanu
Submitted by Ştefan Munteanu
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Restricted Area
High voltage in the air
No way to know its good or bad
Dont try to trick it down
Otherwise you could be dead
So just look out
It may be mean
Just cant be too afraid of this machine
A hole in the middle of the night
In the middle of the night
Restricted area
A hole in the middle of the night
Restricted area
Your brains been mesmerized
And in your mind this place is full of steel,
So full of steel
So shift to overdrive
Crash away the gang with the men from another space
So be aware
Just leave the scene
The worlds been metallized by this machine
A hole in the middle of the night
In the middle of the night
Restricted area
A hole in the middle of the night
Restricted area
A hole in the middle of the night
In the middle of the night
Restricted area
A hole in the middle of the night
In the middle of the night
Restricted area
A hole in the middle of the night
In the middle of the night
The worlds been metallized
A hole in the middle of the night
Restricted area
A hole in the middle of the night
In the middle of the night
Its a restricted area
Hold on - hold on - hold on
Your brains been mesmerized
A hole in the middle of the night
In the middle of the night
Youre heavy metallized
A hole in the middle of the night
song performed by by U. D. O.
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Middle Of The Night
By: jimmy buffett, michael utley, will jennings, art neville
1983
Middle of the night
Hold on till morning
We will see the light
Love is spawning
Middle of the night
Hold on forever
Well know when its right
All together
When will we listen
When will we ever learn
Read all about it
This tide has got to turn
Middle of the night
Hold on till morning
We will see the light
Love is spawning
Middle of the night
Hold on forever
Well know when its right
All together
Old folks and babys
Theyre crying in the storm
I tried to tell them
Soon theyll be safe and warm
Middle of the night
Hold on till morning
We will see the light
Love is spawning
Middle of the night
Hold on forever
Well know when its right
All together
Lord let us out of this hall full of mirrors
Make it all clearer
Dont let us fall
In the middle of the night
Middle of the night
New voices calling
Saying its alright
Im not falling
Middle of the night
Halfway till morning
Middle of my life
New days dawning
Middle of the night
Hold on till morning
We will see the light
Love is spawning
Middle of the night
Hold on forever
Well know when its right
All together
Middle of the night
New voices calling
Saying its alright
Im not falling
Middle of the night
Halfway till morning
Middle of my life
New days dawning
Middle of the night
Hold on till morning
We will see the light
Love is spawning
Middle of the night
Hold on forever
Well no when its right
All together
song performed by by Jimmy Buffett
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Castro couldn't even go to the bathroom unless the Soviet Union put the nickel in the toilet.
quote by Richard M. Nixon
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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In The Middle Of Nowhere
(buddy kaye / bea verdi)
Where does our love lie?
In the middle of nowhere
Will it soon pass me by?
In the middle of nowhere
Baby, wont you tell me
What am I to do?
Im in the middle of nowhere
Getting nowhere with you
Mmm, where did my heart land?
In the middle of nowhere
Where are the dreams I planned?
In the middle of nowhere
Listen to me baby
Listen to my plea
Im in the middle of nowhere
And its worrying me
Over and over again
You tell me you need my love
If what you say is true
Why cant we be together?
Over and over you tell me
Im all that youre thinking of
Baby you know that I love you
But I cant wait forever
Where does our love lie?
In the middle of nowhere
How can you let it die?
In the middle of nowhere
Are you gonna leave me?
Leave my heart astray
Im in the middle of nowhere
Come and show me the way
Over and over again
You tell me you need my love
Baby you know that I love you
But I cant wait forever
Where does our love lie?
In the middle of nowhere
How can you let it die?
In the middle of nowhere
Are you gonna leave me
And leave my heart astray
Im in the middle of nowhere
Come and show me the way
Hey, where does out love lie?
Come on now
Where does our love lie?
Right slap in the middle of nowhere
Right slap in the middle of nowhere
Right slap in the middle of nowhere
song performed by by Dusty Springfield
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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On a Theme by Frost
Amherst never had a witch
O Coos or of Grafton
But once upon a time
There were three old women.
One wore a small beard
And carried a big umbrella.
One stood in the middle
Of the road hailing cars.
One drove an old cart
All over the town collecting junk.
They were not weird sisters,
No relation to one another.
A duly accredited witch I
Never heard Amherst ever had
But as I say there
Were these three old women.
One was prone to appear
At the door (not mine!):
"I've got my nightgown on,
I can stay all night."
One went to a party
At the president's house once
Locked herself in the bathroom
And gave herself a bath.
One had taught Latin, having
Learned it at Mount Holyoke.
Of course Amherst may have
Had witches I never knew.
poem by Robert Francis
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Another Night Fall...
Another night fall caves in
With the last streaks of the dead Sun withering out.
A night fall of no norms again!
In the dim light of the room I watched her eyes
They had a shine that was of norms very personal.
A night fall of no nostalgic flavours yet!
In the middle of my sleep I saw her sweet smile
It had the charm of an oasis amidst the desert of my nightmare.
A night fall of no exact dimensions indeed!
I know the boundaries of a small day-
I feel every night fall to be a small den thereof.
And I take refuge in its mistress`s embrace.
poem by M.d Dinesh Nair
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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The main part of the house is a deep red and I have butterscotch carpet. And I have a bathroom with leopard skin floor, wallpaper and toilet.
Women
Women behind bars, women in fast cars, women in distress, women with no dress
Women in airplanes, women who play games
Women in uniform, see that woman with her clothes gone
Women who satisfy, women you cant buy
Like women in magazines, and women in a limousine
Women who sip champagne, women who feel no pain
Women in a disco, and women who dont wanna know, no no
Oh, women wanting sympathy, women feeling extacy
Women who live in fantasies, bringing man to his knees
Women who boil to love, women who need a shove
Women who cant be beat, get that woman in the back seat, yeah yeah
Women in the usa, those women steal your heart away
Women into rock n roll, women who steal the show, go go go
Women that you write songs about, women that turn around and kick you out
Women you dream about all your life
Women that stab you in the back with a switchblade knife
Oh women, oohoo, talking bout women, all round the world
Yeah women, all the naughty girls, talking bout women, come on baby
song performed by by Foreigner
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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All Of My Days
featuring Changing Faces Jay Z
(R KELLY)
Changing Faces Jay Z Rkelly (whispers)
(JAY Z)
Uh Yeah Jigga Uhu
(R KELLY)
Changing Faces (whispers)
(JAY Z)
How we do
Yo
All of my rhymes fall all of my days i trade
all of my dimes and all of my bad ways i fade
killing late nights cruisin'
all you see is the break lights
and hair blowing you know where we going
or at the club in the rear frontin'
poppin droppin'
the amounts of cats but we aint trying to hear nothing
probably was wilder than wobbly are you the wiggy to give me
hold me down and make me slow down to be twissy
keep the ice out the club life - change face
get on love wife while he on the license plates
wait - make me think about you even when your not around
use the bathroom put the toilet seat back down
got me some sprinkles the hair with the wrinkles
if preferred his and her furs to the ankles
keep your friends buggin' lovin' all my ways
Jigga keep me jiggy all of my days
(CHANGING FACES)
in the middle of the night
got me thinkin' bout cha babe
got me dreamin' about cha baby
(CHORUS)
all that i have
all that i have
baby it's yours
baby it's yours forever and ever baby
all i want is to be with you all of my days
all i want all i need
all i want is to be with you all of my days
all i want baby
(CHANGING FACES)
anything that turn you on
i'll be givin' it to you babe
you dont have to worry baby
(CHORUS 1x)
(JAY Z)
yeah ha ha - check it
(R KELLY)
all i want - all i need
is you in my life - loving me
all i want - all i need
is you in my life
(JAY Z)
uh huh
(R KELLY)
loving me
(JAY Z)
now we going house shoppin'
everybody want to know the prices of spouse droppin'
keep it on the low R Kelly style it's quite shockin'
a year ago all i did was spend nights hoppin'
in the club in search of pretty faces and night stalkers
who would have thought i'd walk down the aisle
rice droppin' got you a nice rock and ...
now it's on and poppin' droppin' holiday platinum bracelets
Jigga - R Kelly - Changing Faces
Uh
(CHORUS x2)
(FADE AWAY
song performed by by R. Kelly
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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If you sit on a seat, and that seat is a comfortable seat, sit on that seat, and do not leave that seat.
Country Woman
Country women now, what you gonna do with your life
Country women now, why dont you get out of this life
Leave my life alone
The first time I met you I knew you were the devils daughter
You came on like a river , doin all the things you oughta
Youre a self made women ,baby, not a made-to-order
If you had your way , I know youd make me stay
And that would only bring me down
Country women now, what you gonna do with your life
Country women now, why dont you get out of this life
Leave my life alone
(break)
Country women , country women ,country women
Country women, country women , ahh....
Country women now, what you gonna do with your life
Country women now, why dont you get out of this life
Leave my life alone
Leave my life alone
Country women now , country women now, country women now,
Country women now , country women now, country women now, (fade)
song performed by by Bee Gees
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Dont Leave Me Now
Dont leave me now
Leave me out in the pouring rain
With my back against the wall
Dont leave me now
Dont leave me now
Leave me out with nowhere to go
And the shadows start to fall
Dont leave me now
Dont leave me now
Leave me out on this lonely road
As the wind begins to howl
Dont leave me now
Dont leave me now
All alone on this darkest night
Feeling old and cold and grey
Dont leave me now
Dont leave me now
Leave me holding an empty heart
As the curtain starts to fall
Dont leave me now
Dont leave me now
All alone in this crazy world
When Im old and cold and grey and time is gone...
song performed by by Supertramp
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Metamorphosis
a girlfriend came in
built me a bed
scrubbed and waxed the kitchen floor
scrubbed the walls
vacuumed
cleaned the toilet
the bathtub
scrubbed the bathroom floor
and cut my toenails and
my hair.
then
all on the same day
the plumber came and fixed the kitchen faucet
and the toilet
and the gas man fixed the heater
and the phone man fixed the phone.
noe I sit in all this perfection.
it is quiet.
I have broken off with all 3 of my girlfriends.
I felt better when everything was in
disorder.
it will take me some months to get back to normal:
I can't even find a roach to commune with.
I have lost my rythm.
I can't sleep.
I can't eat.
I have been robbed of
my filth.
poem by Charles Bukowski
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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The Privacy Of The Home
there is a party
but i am not going
i choose
staying inside the house
not watching tv
but just thinking and
lying low
listening to the silence
of the four walls, and then
i take the exit
outside i go
into the garden at night
under the trees
the scents of some
flowers pervading
and then i take a seat
on a big stone
and feel the hardness
of the earth
i am soft in the middle
of this garden
i like it
this private dwelling
just the trees and the
flowers
in the middle of the night
when everyone is
gone.
poem by Ric S. Bastasa
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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The poor floating whores
The poor floating whores
Secretly from night till dawn
Look for customers
In the middle of the park
To earn money for their food
poem by Asif Andalib
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Breathless
All these posers keep you awake
I guess Im just too tired to sleep
And God only knows Im too lost to cry
Kissing last has kept me true
Ill fall (hold me tight)
But Ill leave (hold me tight)
So hold me tight
Cause Im so lonely
Ill fall (hold me tight)
But Ill leave (hold me tight)
So hold me tight
Cause Im so lonely
He hates so much its love he says
Inside his dark I need to smile
He shouts so loud I never hear
Thats why the truths always abused
As I slip into unconsciousness
I never felt so much to blame
Ill fall (hold me tight)
But Ill leave (hold me tight)
So hold me tight
Cause Im so lonely
Ill fall (hold me tight)
But Ill leave (hold me tight)
So hold me tight
Cause Im so lonely
As I slip into unconsciousness
I never felt so much to blame
Ill fall (hold me tight)
But Ill leave (hold me tight)
So hold me tight
Cause Im so lonely
Ill fall (hold me tight)
But Ill leave (hold me tight)
So hold me tight
Cause Im so lonely
Ill fall (hold me tight)
But Ill leave (hold me tight)
So hold me tight
Cause Im so lonely
Ill fall (hold me tight)
But Ill leave (hold me tight)
So hold me tight
Cause Im so lonely
Ill fall (another day another night)
So hold me tight
Cause Im so lonely
Ill fall (another day another night)
So hold me tight
Cause Im so lonely
song performed by by Texas
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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No Place Like Home
My friend's house is perfect,
they lead such perfect lives.
Curtains never out of place
and beds are made by 9.
The bathroom is in cream,
the toilet seat stays down.
There's tiny little ornaments
and soap balls all around.
My friend's house is perfect,
you dare not move a thing
for if you did they'd notice,
a tad embarrassing.
They dine at 6, no later
and then at half past eight
they have a cup of Earl Grey
and slithers of cream cake.
They talk of trivial matters,
the world evaporates.
Inside their house its perfect,
the world outside can wait.
That's why I run for cover,
right back here, alone.
It may not be quite perfect
but there's no place like home.
poem by Ruth Walters
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Starving for success
Its time to eat
but i cant leave this seat
See i missed too many meals already
And my feet feels stuck to the concrete
I must have suffered decite
Why would I trap myself to a seat
i must figure out a plan or else
I will be stuck for weeks
Now my eyes are starting to get heavy
I become angry because
i begin to feel the tears fall
I am not mad because
of tears falling im mad because
I dont want to crawl,
Plus Im worried about the fall
From the chair to the ground
If I fall now I would be below my feet
If i fall now I would be deverstated
from the blow of the concrete
Decite feelings are leaving,
new one arrive and they feel like defeat
Is it because of the concrete Im diving into
Or is it from the consequences i face
Trying to be content in my space
poem by Jaycee Wilkerson
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Women's Liberation
Talk to me about the feminist movement,
the gubba middle class
hetero sexual revolution
way back in the seventies
when men wore tweed jackets with
leather elbows, and the women, well
I don’t remember or maybe I just don’t care
or can’t relate.
Now what were those white women on about?
What type of neurosis was fashionable back then?
So maybe I was only a school kid; and kids, like women,
have got on thing that joins that schemata,
like we’re not worth listening to,
and who wants to liberate women and children
what will happen in an egalitarian society
if the women and the kids start becoming complacent
in that they believe they should have rights
and economic independence,
and what would these middle class kids and white women do
with liberation, with freedom, with choices of
do I stay with my man, do I fall in love with other
white middle class women, and it wouldn’t matter if
my new woman had kids or maybe even kids and dogs
Yes I’m for the women’s movement
I want to be free and wear dunlop tennis shoes.
And indigenous women, well surely, the liberation
of white women includes all women regardless . . .
It doesn’t, well that’s not for me to deal with
I mean how could I, a white middle class woman,
who is deciding how can I budget when my man won’t
pay the school fees and the diner’s card club simply
won’t extend credit.
I don’t even know if I’m capable
of understanding
Aborigines, in Victoria?
Aboriginal women, here, I’ve never seen one,
and if I did, what would I say,
damned if I’m going to feel guilty, for wanting something
better for me, for women in general, not just white
middle class Volvo driving, part time women’s studies
students
Maybe I didn’t think, maybe I thought women in general
meant, Aboriginal women, the Koori women in Victoria
Should I apologise
should I feel guilty
Maybe the solution is to sponsor
a child through world vision.
Yes that’s probably best,
I feel like I could cope with that,
Look, I’d like to do something for our Aborigines
but I haven’t even met one,
and if I did I would say
all this business about land rights, maybe I’m a bit
scared, what’s it mean, that some day I’ll wake up
and there will be this flag, what is it, you know
red, black and that yellow circle, staked out front
and then what, Okay I’m sorry, I feel guilt
is that what I should be shouting
from the top of the rialto building
The women’s movement saved me
maybe the 90s will be different.
I’m not sure what I mean, but I know that although
it’s not just a women’s liberation that will free us
it’s a beginning
poem by Lisa Bellear
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