The shelf life of the modern hardback writer is somewhere between the milk and the yogurt.
quote by John Mortimer
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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The shelf life of the average trade book is somewhere between milk and yogurt.
quote by Calvin Trillin
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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The average trade book has a shelf life of between milk and yogurt, except for books by any member of the Irving Wallace family - they have preservatives.
quote by Calvin Trillin
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Victory Bakery
save me a spot
please............................... .........................
i will die should i have to sit without food...
i am a big girl..............................
food a need......
oh and....
i am allergic to 'nuts', shellfish, strawberries (at times) as well as...do not try to 'trick' me into eating YOGURT or other foods that might have touched shell fish-just to 'see'.
My epi-pens have become quite an expense...
oh theme song
'yogurt, yogurt'
poem by Necessary No Name
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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The one who burns his mouth for drinking milk too hot, eats even yogurt carefully.
The difference between Los Angeles and yogurt is that yogurt comes with less fruit.
quote by Rush Limbaugh
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Modern Dancing
Modern, modern, modern, modern dancing
Modern dancing, modern dancing
Modern dancing, modern
I see you acting modernly with the boys and girls
Exposure breeds discovery in the modern world
The 60's hairdos 90's eyes are just flashing lights
A touch of neon hinting class for the modern night
Modern dancing, modern dancing
Modern dancing, modern dancing
Dancing
Modern dancing, modern dancing
Modern dancing, modern
Mono vision tv face and determined eyes
The clothes are perfect the rips in place just the perfect size
Familiarity breeds contempt but it doesn't show
We've heard the music times before but it still makes you go
Modern dancing, modern dancing
Modern dancing, modern dancing
Modern dancing, dancing
....variations to fade....
song performed by by Men Without Hats
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Paperback Writer
(LennonMcCartney)
Paperback writer
Dear Sir or Madam, will you read my book?
It took me years to write, will you take a look?
It's based on a novel by a man named Lear
And I need a job, so I want to be a paperback writer
Paperback writer
It's the dirty story of a dirty man
And his clinging wife doesn't understand
His son is working for the Daily Mail
It's a steady job but he wants to be a paperback writer
Paperback writer
Paperback writer
It's a thousand pages, give or take a few
I'll be writing more in a week or two
I can make it longer if you like the style
I can change it round and I want to be a paperback writer
Paperback writer
If you really like it you can have the rights
It could make a million for you overnight
If you must return it, you can send it here
But I need a break and I want to be a paperback writer
Paperback writer
Paperback writer
Paperback writer, paperback writer
Paperback writer, paperback writer
Paperback writer, paperback writer
Paperback writer, paperback writer (fade out)
song performed by by Paul McCartney
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Lactose Intolerant
I lack the enzymes
To properly digest lactose
I cant drink cows milk
I cant drink milk from a goat
Yogurt, cottage cheese
Make me throw up
Please no cream in my cup
My stomach is swelling
I am lactose --- intolerant
My throat is constricting
I am lactose --- intolerant
song performed by by Cyndi Lauper
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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The afterthought
The afterthought
~
The poetry section in the library, an afterthought
A little over fifteen books thrown onto a shelf
Amongst books of quotations and how to write
Books about books and sporting anecdotes
It seems poetry here is consigned to obscurity
A disappointing assessment of literature
A few of the named greats, a few anthologies
The favourite love poems, poems on war
A three quarter shelf collection if at all
Perhaps it’s a sign of the times changing
Modern life being unable to relate anymore
To the notions and thoughts of poetic lore
The pace picked up so long ago
The gentle stroll now a sprinting run
No more stopping to smell the air
The need to be someplace doing something
Everything else consigned to the shelf
Like a mirror reflecting the new world
The poetry of life has become an afterthought
poem by Matthew Holloway
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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The Modern Day
I stand up for my pride
I dont wanna be just like anyone
In this world I cannot hide
I must finish what I have begun
Thats the way I play
In the modern day
cause I wanna stay
In the modern day
Got a picture in my mind
Of the way that I wanna be
So I search until I find
The power inside of me
Its another phase
Of the modern day
Gotta face up to this life
Cant let it get the best of me
So I make a sacrifice
If thats the way it has to be
Im doin what I feel is right
Im ready if I need to fight
In the modern way
In the modern day
Gotta face up to this life
Cant let it get the best of me
If I make a sacrifice
Thats the way it has to be
Like a motor in overdrive
I feel good and I feel alive
I got no need to beg or borrow
Got a shortcut to tomorrow
And Im on my way
To the modern day
Got a lot to say
In the modern day
cause I need to stay
In the modern day
In the modern day
song performed by by Foreigner
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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One Word
I have been searching all my life,
For one beautiful word;
Just one, through the corners of my mind,
Through the paperback acres,
To hardback libraries and now
That I've found it…
I realise it was there all along,
Simple and unassuming,
You.
© 2012
poem by Nick Strong
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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My shopping list.
I am going twice a week in the supermarket,
Always preparing beforehand my shopping list,
For example,
Eggs,
Semi-skimmed milk,
A clear consciousness, and
Two bottles of bourbon,
Fresh fruits, and not forget to buy,
Vegetables,
Self-confidence, and, let's see what more, maybe…
One fruit-juice carton, or perhaps two,
A yogurt with low fat,
Fulfillment and something else I have completely forgotten.
poem by Adamantios Tsakaludis
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Modern Age
Well I found a road and off I sped
I met a man with no little toe and a real big head
Though I did not speak somehow I said
Where are you from? He said the modern age
And where are you from? I said the modern age
On the shore by the sea that was still lathering
I met a man in the business of hunting and gathering
Somehow we understood each other's blathering
And he said where are you from? I said the modern age
And where are you from? He said the modern age
Stopped at a light in my car
I asked the next car how they are
They say that we are fine and how are you?
I say that I am fine and thank you
I'm feeling fine in the modern age
Driving around in the modern age
Driving around in the modern age
song performed by by Frank Black
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Ode to the Modern Work-Man
O, wretched modern work-man
The years, they pass you by
Everything you believe
Is nothing but a lie.
O, wretched modern work-man
From your neckties to your socks
You’re nothing but a slave
To pictures in a box.
O, wretched modern work-man
You live for the Public Eye
Your life is but a parody
Whose foundation is a lie.
O, wretched modern work-man
You strive, and save, and yearn
To keep up with the Kamaus
Spending more than you earn.
O, wretched modern work-man
You’re nothing but a slave
Your dreams are dead and buried
Lying in a shallow grave.
O, wretched modern work-man
You strangled your own dreams
You smothered your own happiness
Your hand stifled its screams.
O, wretched modern work-man
For the camera so aesthetic
Beneath the plastic smile
You’re pitiful and pathetic.
O, wretched modern work-man
You work yourself half to death
Chasing pounds and shillings
To swell another’s wealth.
O, wretched modern work-man
You lived your whole life as a show
Yet the only Watcher who mattered
Didn’t like what He saw.
O, wretched modern work-man
When you finally died
Your surname, and hospital bill
Were all you left behind…
song of Father Gabriele Amorth
The Daily Mail, UK and Herald Sun (Australia) report on how
Father Gabriele Amroth of the Vatican teaches that yoga and
Harry Potter and the ‘oriental religions’ are
the works of the Devil...the following poem expresses my outrage
at such stupidity and parochialism that still exists
amongst some groups of Europeans even today in their relations
with the East
O yoga yoga
baby baby
sings Father Gabriele Amorth
in the Italian town of Terni
O yoga yoga
no go no go
to yoga yoga
baby baby
all you innocents
and pure
all blessed
and destined for Heaven
no go to yoga yoga
yoga yoga
yogurt is fine
sugar in your yogurt is fine
strawberry and apple
in your yogurt is fine
so eat eat your
yogurt yogurt yogurt
but yoga yoga
O yoga yoga
no go no go no go baby
baby baby
sings Father Gabriele Amorth
in the Italian town of Terni
and also no go to Harry Potter
baby baby baby
no go no go
no go to yoga no to yoga
and no go no go
to Harry Potter
baby baby baby
now say after me:
“yoga yoga yoga
baa baa baa
bad bad bad”
and say after me:
“Harry Potter Harry Potter
moo moo moo
bad bad bad”
O baby baby baby
at our next conference
I’ll teach you
how the Dragon is bad
and how the Chinese got it all wrong
all these centuries
with their Chinese Dragon, Dragon, Dragon
but that’s for next time
next time next time
baby baby baby
for now just repeat after me
your most reverend
Father Gabriele Amorth
in the Italian town of Terni:
O yoga yoga
no go no go
to yoga yoga
baby baby
And say after me
all ye faithful
all ye blessed:
“Harry Potter Harry Potter
moo moo moo
bad bad bad”
poem by Raj Arumugam
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Writer- a must?
Out of what does a writer write?
Out of hatred or perversion;
Out of denial or deprivation.
Why does a writer write?
To vent his anger or hatred.
To cry out from pain or lust.
How does a writer write?
By borrowing or distorting.
By modeling or duping.
For what does a writer write?
For an applause and a place.
It alone suits him, an idler.
What is the use of a writer?
For him to flaunt his skill.
For readers to idle away
Does the society need a writer?
Does a woman need cosmetics?
Writer is a part of civilization
16.05.2007.
poem by Rm. Shanmugam Chettiar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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A Writer's Dream
A writer's dream
You keep trying
Never denying to one day achieve
Despite what most believe
A writer's dream
You never give up
Regardless of what others may say
But wait patiently until that day
A writer's dream
Although it's been a while
It made you smile
To see your dream coming through
No matter how long it seemed to you
A writer's dream
You always believed in yourself
That's why your time has come
To be a successful writer
With the privilege of making much income
A writer's dream
You're happy to finally get this far
The world knows just who you are
Now this new sudden fame
Makes you feel like a star
poem by Donielle Smith
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Bacchic geometry [Geometrie bahică]
Fed with sweet milk and yogurt quite a lot
A Greek whose mind was brilliant and divine,
By looking at two dots at once he thought
The shortest of the roads was the straight line.
This axiom, accepted as we see,
And which today all people can explain,
Was valid in the past and still will be,
But only for the horizontal plane.
And if you want some knowledge to derive,
When think of horizontal planes you'll find,
That nature doesn't feel for them a drive
And so, they're just a whim of the Greek mind.
Instead of milk we drink “Madeira” wine
And all of us can easily observe
That on the sphere each carefully drawn line
Stays never straight, but turns into a curve.
And thinking at the straight of the dead Greek
Until an areopagus decides,
After debates and thoroughly critique,
In zigzag lines each goes where he resides.
poem by Al. O. Teodoreanu, translated by Octavian Cocoş
Submitted by anonym
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Land Of Honey And Milk
Land of Milk & Honey.
The president has banned the verb “work, ” there are no job seekers
or unemployed people, but those who administrate the state are on
duty. Since all is mechanized, digitalized and robotozied there is little
need for citizens to do anything, but receive a monthly card to spend
on food, clothes and other things, and they will be well enumerated.
At last the masses have been set free from the toil of labour.
They can sleep as long as they want, walk in the park or pursue sport,
meet in the evening and read poetry, with the understanding “work”
is not mentioned, ‘cause the state know some poets are insubordinate
and will try to sneak in “work” by calling it something else. If the state
censor find out the writer will be banned from all public gatherings and
not being able to buy yogurt till he repents and writes nice things about
the beautiful colour of plastic flowers, made by a robot called Rose.
It has taken mankind thousands of years to reach this stage of maturity,
and they will look up to the clear blue sky and say: “Truly this is Utopia.”
poem by Oskar Hansen
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Please stay away, our people have to survive!
A curd woman carries a pot of yogurt that drips on her moon forehead
The crystal white droplets drench the old soul, shouts, "yogurt,
Fresh yogurt, churned butter, anyone wants to buy? ",
Vegetable man pushes his cart, full of colorful vitamin vegetables,
Shouts as usual, "Vegetable, Vegetable, Green vegetables".
Fruits seller and fish monger carry their bounties in the baskets,
Pots, pans, spoons and brooms are sold on streets,
Sweat, tear, longing and desperation in discreet,
What place do the multinational whole sale retailer hit,
On the soil of poor people, where people live as dogs and cats.
Please stay away from us and we are not the good market,
as the habit of descendant will not let you see the profit.
poem by Veeraiyah Subbulakshmi
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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