The uglier a man's legs are, the better he plays golf - it's almost a law.
quote by H.G. Wells
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Golf Tees Lament
Golf tees on my dresser
Golf tees in my bed
Golf tees on my pillows
Where they poke me in my head
Golf tees in my closet
Falling from my shirts and pants
Golf tees along the baseboards
Just like army ants
Golf tees in the carpet
And underneath my feet
Golf tees lined up on the mantle
Oh, they look so neat
Golf tees in my couch
And in my back and thighs
When I sit and watch TV
I feel those little guys
Golf tees in the kitchen
In Jurassic coffee mugs
Sometimes when I pass them
They look like prehistoric bugs.
Golf tees in the bathtub
Like sailors on plastic ships
Golf tee in her make-up
Like little bald q-tips.
Golf tees in the attic
Golf tees in the shed
Golf tees, golf tees everywhere
I wonder where they bred?
Golf tees out the backdoor
Like Hansel-and-Gretel’s trails
Golf tees in the flowerbeds
Among the mulch and snails
Golf tees in my car
And underneath the mats
Golf tees in the backseat
Like little baseball bats
But when I am at the golf course
I ask my partner, like a louse…
“May I borrow some of your tees? ”
I left mine at the house!
poem by Larry Buddin
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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The Ugly Truth
the last time that the kid
saw it
it was uglier than ever
and he sees it again
when he gained reason
(he has become a handsome
prince and soon to inherit a kingdom
with the same usual package
of a princess for a queen)
it becomes less uglier
but how can he simply throw it
away when it is all the while
an essential part of him?
poem by Ric S. Bastasa
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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A Perfect Golf Course Lawn
A perfect golf course lawn,
A house painted by numbers,
A dog plays out back, and all
the children say, whats for
lunch, or dinner,
A man pulls in,
a women waves a white flag,
and all the children say,
this is my mom, and this is
my dad.
A perfect golf course lawn.
poem by David Gerardino
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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It's a weird city because the uglier the weather, the more beautiful the city. And the uglier the buildings, the more coherent the city.
quote by Rem Koolhaas
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Anybody who plays golf will tell you that you play against yourself.
quote by Martin Sheen
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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The majority of people who buy homes in golf course communities don't play golf. Golf is way down at the bottom in terms of total numbers and growth.
quote by Ed McMahon
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Leg
I know your legs are
On the legs of Baali the demon king
I know your legs are
On the head of Bharata your brother
I know your legs are on the
Head of Uddhaba your follower.
You have no leg I heard.
I Know you are present everywhere
Everytime and in everybody.
I do not know what a leg is.
I know the insect has six legs
I know the animal has four legs
I know the bird has two legs.
Your leg is my project paper
I do not know howmany legs you have
I do not know I a leg is.
poem by Gajanan Mishra
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For A Round Of Golf
For leisure the game that so many do play
For a round of golf 'tis a beautiful day
By the wide slow flowing river that crawls to the sea
Men and women practice their strokes before their evening tea.
As a boy I believed hobby golfers had easy jobs
And that those who enjoyed golf were well to do snobs
But such antiquated thinking not relevant today
As all kinds of classes the game of golf play.
A beautiful day for a beautiful game
For most hobby golfers with no aspirations to fame
After work they go to the golf course in the evening sun
And play the eighteen holes for the sake of fun.
Of the praises of golf everybody doesn't sing
But for the participants a game without physical contact can be such a fun thing
In the golf course by the river that to the sea crawl
The crack of the iron on the stone hard golf ball.
poem by Francis Duggan
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The place of the father in the modern suburban family is a very small one, particularly if he plays golf.
quote by Bertrand Russell
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Golfing by Myself
I used to make fun of my dad
because he took golf so seriously
then I started playing with my boss
who plays even more serious
so I started making fun of my dad
for not taking it serious enough
now I play by myself
poem by Dallin Bruun
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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They say Yogi Berra is funny. Well, he has a lovely wife and family, a beautiful home, money in the bank, and he plays golf with millionaires. What's funny about that?
quote by Casey Stengel
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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The Golf Walk
Behold, my child, this touching scene,
The golfer on the golfing-green;
Pray mark his legs’ uncanny swing,
The golf-walk is a gruesome thing!
See how his arms and shoulders ride
Above his legs in haughty pride,
While over bunker, hill and lawn
His feet, relentless, drag him on.
And does the man walk always so?
Nay! nay I my child, and eke, oh! no!
It is a gait he only knows
When he has on his golfing clothes.
Blame not the man for that strange stride
He could not help it if he tried;
It is his timid feet that try
From his obstreperous clothes to fly.
poem by Ellis Parker Butler
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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I was out on the golf course, a guy came riding out in a golf cart and said, Did you know that Elvis died? And I just said, Well, there you go. It was like I had kinda been expecting it.
I don't like going to the mall. I'm not really like the other girls. I just like to go out on the golf course and play. Golf is fun and feels really good.
quote by Michelle Wie
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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A kid grows up a lot faster on the golf course. Golf teaches you how to behave.
quote by Jack Nicklaus
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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I just picked up golf, it was good, give me a chance to play golf.
quote by Abdullah Ahmad Badawi
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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A lot of my buddies also played golf, but when it came to going to the beach or on the boat and chasing girls, they usually went that way and I went to the golf course.
The Lovin' Crocodile
To make this news will cheer me up tonight,
But where do doves despair when caught alight?
There is no chance in this to reunite,
As far as eyes can tell to be polite.
I ponder more these ways that reconcile
Our brothers fighting more, and then even;
It's like the rage of love, that crocodile
That menacingly poses some lovin'.
I hear the sound of reptiles speaking bad,
I see them down the river lurking now,
My thoughts are with the danger so forbad,
It crawled on legs so uglier, but how?
I see them now and then, in waters cold,
To be polite, to be polite and bold.
poem by Naveed Akram
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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It takes having your golf peak four different times throughout the year. You have to like all four golf courses. You've got to be the best of that week for the four weeks.
quote by Karrie Webb
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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I like going there for golf. America's one vast golf course these days.
quote by Edward VIII
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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