Related quotes: The average tourist wants to...

The average tourist wants to go to places where there are no tourists.

quote by Sam Ewing
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Related quotes

Average Guy

I aint no christian or no born again saint
I aint no cowboy or marxist d.a.
I aint no criminal or reverend cripple from the right
I am just your average guy, trying to do whats right
Im just your average guy
An average guy
I am just your average guy
Im just an average guy
Average guy, Im just your average guy
Im average looking and Im average inside
Im an average lover and I live in an average place
You wouldnt know me if you met me face to face
Im just your average guy
Average guy
Average guy
Im just an average guy
I worry about money and taxes and such
I worry that my livers big and it hurts to the touch
I worry about my health and bowels
And the crime waves in the street
Im really just your average guy
Trying to stand on his own two feet
Im just your average guy
Im just your average guy
Im just your average guy
Average guy
Average looks, average taste
Average height, an average waist
Average in everything I do
My temperature is 98.2
Im just your average guy
An average guy
Average guy
Im just an average guy
Average guy
Im just your average guy
Im just your average guy
Im just your average guy
Average

song performed by by Lou Reed
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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The worst thing about being a tourist is having other tourists recognize you as a tourist.

quote by Russell Baker
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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The tourist may complain of other tourists, but he would be lost without them.

quote by Agnes Repplier
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Prayer for many is like a foreign land. When we go there, we go as tourists. Like most tourists, we feel uncomfortable and out of place. Like most tourists, we therefore move on before too long and go somewhere else.

quote by Robert McAfee Brown
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Bareipani Waterfall Vavroovahana Patra

Bareipani waterfall looks beautiful;
Mind is delightful.
Second largest waterfall of India In Odisha entices tourists daily;
In Abhayaranya the waterfall lures poets, writers gaudily.

Tourists behold the beauty from a distance;
The wondrous spectacle provides pleasure, appreciate God’s creation desire it is bliss.
Bareipani flows naturally;
Poet enjoys the beauty enthusiastically.

Wondrous waterfall provides pleasure;
Melodious Beauty plays in the lap of Nature.
Beauteous is the high mountain;
Tourist’s mind enthuses beholding the fountain.

Poet beholds the beauty amazingly;
Mind remains in the world of peace gleefully.
Abhayaranya is wondrous;
Allures tourists, with pleasure.

poem by Vavroovahana Patra
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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I've always said when I broke in I was an average player. I had an average arm, average speed and definitely an average bat. I am still average in all of those.

quote by Brooks Robinson
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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The Tourist Plan

‘We have to rule on the Tourist Plan, '
Said Rogan Inchalot,
‘If we haven't come up with an answer soon
Then what have we really got?
The budget's stuck into overdrive
And the costs are going to balloon! '
(The future hung in the balance
On that Saturnday afternoon!)

‘We've always kept it a secret, ' said
The man called Iron Girth,
‘So what do we want with the tourists,
All those imbeciles, from Earth! '
‘We need to collar the dollars, ' said
Minerva Astropine,
‘We're never going to develop, if
We sit around, and whine! '

‘Our secret isn't as safe today,
With all those satellites,
It's becoming an inconvenience
Whenever we douse the lights!
The takings from the Casino drop
The punters stay in the dome,
We need to double our takings, then
Just send the tourists home! '

‘But what if they send their gangsters here,
Their armies, and their guns?
How will we ever defend ourselves,
You know how the story runs!
There's twenty million refugees
I heard a broadcast say,
All spilling over their borders there,
In search of a place to stay! '

‘They'll come out here in their feeble ships,
Break down, and S.O.S.,
While we'll be expected to rescue them…'
‘In their dreams! ' said Gunter Hess.
The meeting called for a show of hands
But was plunged in a sudden gloom,
They've shut the book on the Tourist Plan
For the Dark Side of the Moon!

poem by David Lewis Paget
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Ballad Of Skip Wiley

He's a man on a mission
Wild as a ricochet
Picture if you can
When the everglades ran
From the gulf coast to Biscayne Bay
He's gonna give it back to the gators
Lock the tourists up in theme parks and zoos
He says "join me for lunch at the reptiles brunch
Where the Barometer Soup is you"
He's crazy and dangerous
But who else can you trust
He's the outlaw in all of us
The environmental terrorist
Chorus
You can mess with the mouse in Orlando
Jilt a tourist in St. Augustine
You can shoplift all day at Blockbuster
But you can't steal the Orange Bowl Queen
No you can't steal the Orange Bown Queen
Verse
There were crimes of epic proportions
All part of Skip Wiley's crusade
Tourists were cackin' and tourists were packin'
While he and Skink cooled their heels in the shade
Then came the citrus sensation
"Welcome to the revolution" he said
With a pirate's persona he snatched the gridiron Madonna
And the big movers called for his head
He's crazy and dangerous
But who else can you trust
He's the outlaw in all of us
The environmental terrorist
Chorus
You can mess with the mouse in Orlando
Jilt a tourist in St. Augustine
You can rag on the Miami Dolphins
But you can't steal the Orange Bowl Queen
No you can't steal the Orange Bowl Queen (x2)
Well Skip's caper it kind of backfired
And got the orange juice barons rather upset
In the light of bad moods, these manhunts ensued
But Skip easily slipped through the net
He was last seen atop a mangrove
Perched like a wounded osprey
He was not meant to last, he belongs to the past
And I hope he gets there one day
He's crazy and dangerous
But who else can you trust
He's the outlaw in all of us
The environmental terrorist
Chorus
You can mess with the mouse in Orlando
Jily a tourist in St. Augustine
You can shoplift your days at Blockbuster
But you can't steal the Orange Bown Queen
No you can't steal the Orange Bown Queen (x2

song performed by by Jimmy Buffett
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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The Ballad Of Skip Wiley

Hes a man on a mission
Wild as a ricochet
Picture if you can when the everglades ran
From the gulf coast to biscayne bay
Hes gonna give it back to the gators
Lock the tourists up in theme parks and zoos
He says join me for lunch at the reptiles brunch
Where the barometer soup is you
Hes crazy and dangerous
But who else can you trust
Hes the outlaw in all of us
The environmental terrorist
Ou can mess with that mouse in orlando
Jilt a tourist in st. augustine
Ou can shoplift all day at blockbuster
But you cant steal the orange bowl queen
No you cant steal the orange bowl queen
Spoken:
Thats unthinkable in the state of florida
What would the chamber of commerce say
This man is sick
Eah
There were crimes of epic proportions
All part of skip wileys crusade
Tourists were cackin
And tourists were packin
While he and skink cooled there heels in the shade
Then came the citrus sensation
Welcome to the revolution he said
With a pirates persona
He snatched the gridiron madonna
And the day groovers called for his head
Hes crazy and dangerous
But who else can you trust
Hes the outlaw in all of us
The environmental terrorist
Ou can mess with that mouse in orlando
Jilt a tourist in st. augustine
Ou can rag on the miami dolphins
But you cant steal the orange bowl queen
No you cant steal the orange bowl queen
No, no you cant steal the orange bowl queen
Spoken:
Well skips caper it kinda backfired
Got the orange juice barons rather upset
In the light of bad moves these manhunts ensued
Skip easily slipped through the net
He was last seen atop of a mangrove
Perched like a wounded osprey
He was not meant to last
He belongs to the past
And I hope he gets there one day
Hes crazy and dangerous
But who else can you trust
Hes the outlaw in all of us
The environmental terrorist (terrorist)
Ou can mess with that mouse in orlando
Jilt a tourist in st. augustine
Ou can shoplift your days at blockbuster
But you cant steal the orange bowl queen
No you cant steal the orange bowl queen
No you cant steal the orange bowl queen
Thats right

song performed by by Jimmy Buffett
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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The Tale Of The Two Tubby Tourists

The Pedicab drivers of Gotham all say
You should ignore a 'Whale Hail'
because it just doesn't pay.
The city is hilly and
to pedal gets tough
when your passengers are,
shall we say, overstuffed.

Two tubby tourists out on the town
between them they weighed about
Eight Hundred Pounds.
They had wiped out the Sushi
at an all you can eat.
Much too lazy to walk
on their overstressed feet.

They hailed for a Pedicab
of which there's a multitude
Thats the sole explanation
for accepting their pulchritude.

Their ride started slowly,
but pleasant enough.
But then came a hill
and the going got rough.

He groaned and he struggled
as he trucked up the road,
but not even juiced Armstrong
could handle this load.

With two tubby tourists
ensconced in the back.
He slowed to a crawl
then stalled in his tracks.

Something had to give
with those two in the rear
The cab then turned turtle
chucking him in the air.

The two tubby tourist
were down on their backs
Their driver unconscious
and two tires flat.

An Ambulance came
and gave him first aide
The two tourists rolled off
and he never got paid.

If we banned too large colas
and sixty ounce beers
could we hope that these
land whales
might, one day, disappear?

Until then its risky
to pick such fares up
unless in a limo
or a truck thats Ram tough

poem by John F. McCullagh
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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The Ballade Of The Average Reader

I try to touch the public taste,
For thus I earn my daily bread.
I try to write what folks will paste
In scrap books after I am dead.
By Public Craving I am led.
(I' sooth, a most despotic leader)
Yet, though I write for Tom and Ned,
I've never seen an average reader.

The Editor is good and chaste,
But says: (Above the public's head;
This is _too_ good; 'twill go to waste.
Write something commonplacer-
Ed.)
Write for the average reader, fed
By pre-digested near-food's feeder,
But though my high ideals have fled,
I've never _seen_ an average reader.

How many lines have been erased!
How many fancies have been shed!
How many failures might be traced
To this-this average-reader dread!
I've seen an average single bed;
I've seen an average garden-weeder;
I've seen an average cotton thread-
I've _never_ seen an average _reader_.

L'ENVOI

Most read of readers, if you've read
The works of any old succeeder,
You know that he, too, must have said:
'I've never seen an Average Reader.'

poem by Franklin P. Adams
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Extraordinary

You think that I go home at night
Take off my clothes, turn out the lights
But I burn letters that I write
To you, to make you love me
Yeah, I'd drive naked through the park
And run the stop sign in the dark
Stand in the street, yell out my heart
To you, to make you love me
I am extraordinary, if you'd ever get to know me
I am extraordinary, I am just your ordinary
Average every day sane psycho
Supergoddess
Average every day sane psycho
You may not believe in me
But I believe in you
So I still take the trash out
Does that make me too normal for you?
So dig a little deeper, cause
You still don't get it yet
See me lickin' my lips, need a primitive fix
And I'll make, I'll make you love me
I am extraordinary, if you'd ever get to know me
I am extraordinary, I am just your ordinary
Average every day sane psycho
Supergoddess
Average every day sane psycho
Supergoddess
See me jump through hoops for you
You stand there watching me performing
What exactly do you do?
Have you ever thought it's you that's boring?
Who the hell are you?
I am extraordinary, if you'd ever get to know me
I am extraordinary, I am just your ordinary
Average every day sane psycho
Supergoddess
Average every day sane psycho
Average every day sane psycho
Supergoddess
Average every day sane psycho
Average every day sane psycho
Supergoddess
Average every day sane psycho
Average every day sane psycho

song performed by by Liz Phair
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Well, it was just, the bars was all just like the bamboo roofs and everything. You know. As I say, to me, it's completely spoiled all, all these places now. Make them all just tourist traps.

quote by David Walker
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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The tourist who moves about to see and hear and open himself to all the influences of the places which condense centuries of human greatness is only a man in search of excellence.

quote by Max Lerner
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Legendary profitabilty.

A quiet space a secret place.
A rocky cave in the cliff face.
Which somehow makes you feel welcome.
A hermit once made this his home.

A healer and an herbalist.
The legends say he did exist.
It’s said he never charged a fee
But gave his services for free.

To the poorest folks of his day.
But those who were rich enough to pay
Had to pay accordingly
For medicine the poor got free.

He was regarded with respect.
Exactly as you would expect.
His treatments worked effectively.
Because he knew the properties.

Of every herb both root and leaf.
And which to use to bring relief.
From common ailments of the day
His nostrums drove the pain away.

Although his fame spread far and wide.
He was determined to abide.
In the haven he had chosen
Far apart from other men.

As a hermit ought to do
And to his principles be true.
None knows his true identity
Lost in the mists of history.

The cave can still be seen today
And tourists come from far away.
Perhaps from curiosity
although there’s not a lot to see.

The tourists are prepared to spend.
That’s why the local all pretend.
That they believe the legends true
Because it suits their pockets to.

Sell souvenirs to visitors
at an inflated price of course.
You might well think I’m cynical
The locals are quite typical.

If there’s a profit to be made
Encouraging the tourist trade.
You can be sure they will supply
whatever tourists want to buy.

The legends may or may not be
Well rooted in reality.
What does it matter anyway
As long as it can be made to pay.

Thursday,02 February 2012
http: // blog.myspace.com/poeticpiers.

poem by Ivor Or Ivor.e Hogg
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Song: An Average Cyber Hero

I'm your average cyber hero;
I don't exist in space.
My algorithm's zero.
I lack all human grace.
I'm your average cyber hero;
And I know my cyber place.
But my wheels are real and turning,
And burning up apace.

I'm your average cyber hero,
Writ in glyph of lower case.
An avatar of Nero,
With a second life and face.
I'm your average cyber hero,
With a cryptic clue to trace;
And I'll out-google Google,
With an engine cued to chase.

I'm your average cyber hero;
But you may think me more.
In the binaries of Zeno,
I'm both paradox and law.
I am the master gatekeeper,
I open many doors
Of perception, in this nano
World, of educated spores.

I'm your average cyber hero.
And I have no warming breath.
I endure a kind of limbo,
That's near to living death.
I'm your average cyber hero,
And I'll dive your hidden depths,
To the clearest seas I've seen below,
Your permafrost and steppes.

I'm your average cyber hero,
Who explores the world within.
A giant, not a minnow,
But a true leviathan.
I'm your average cyber hero,
And I'll plumb your secret well,
To plunge like Captain Nemo,
From a fate not unlike hell.

I'm your average cyber hero.
I'm the ghost in your machine.
Both as sleuth and dogged shadow,
You'll not escape unseen.
I'm your average cyber hero,
You dismiss by barb and scoff;
But I know your craven credo,
Won't let you turn me off!

poem by David SmithWhite
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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About being ordinary

There is nothing
Exceptional,
Nothing special
With me,

I am just ordinary

In decency, in status,
I am what you call
the average man,
Of no special rank
Of lesser significance

I am found
In the most common
Places, undistinguished
in the most common men
in the market, in the mall,
in the park, in the beach,
in the streets, in the church,
in anywhere in everywhere

I am what you see
As plain, the usual
The most customary
that you meet &
easily forget

I am the
Normal person that you
Shake hands with,
whose name
does not linger
long enough in your mind

I live in the many
I am the numerous
I breathe the common Air
I drink the water
For everyone
I smell like the
Sweat of the rest
I look like everyone
Because I am the average
Because I am the ordinary

But without me
You will never be
Special

In truth it is us
The common ones
In this whole world
The background
These ordinary
Occurrences and
Resemblances

That make you
Exist,

We, the average,
We, the people of this world
We are the ordinary
And you cannot
Disregard us,

We are the many,
And we can always
Disregard you
If we really want to

we make you
and we can always unmake you

mister special..

poem by Ric S. Bastasa
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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