The most fun I ever have is sitting in with Rick writing, and we laugh at our own jokes.
quote by Adrian Edmondson
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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All the Jokes
All the jokes have already been told
And so instead, we tell jokes about how
All the jokes have already been told
But these new jokes aren't very funny
In fact, they're actually kind of sad
So instead we tell jokes about how
All the new jokes aren't very funny
In fact, they're actually kind of sad
Because they remind us about how
All the jokes have already been told
But these jokes get old very quickly
So we make up new jokes about how
The jokes about the new jokes about how
All the jokes that have already been told
Are starting to get quite old
But after a while, once these jokes
Have gotten quite old themselves
We sit and listen to the silence
And wonder about the past, and how
All the jokes have already been told
Then suddenly, out of nowhere
Somebody comes up with a joke
That had been forgotten long ago
But is so funny we can't even breathe
So we roll on the floor, gasping for air
poem by Derek Ouyang
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Our show was - it remained - you know, kids could watch it and laugh at it. And they wouldn't know - they wouldn't get the jokes. But they would laugh at it. So they tell me now they have grown up and they're watching it. Now they get the jokes. But we didn't say anything blatant.
quote by Rue McClanahan
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Writing On The Wall
Words and music by rick nielsen
All right, I saw the writing on the wall.
All night, I saw the writing on the wall,
I saw the writing on the wall.
Lo and behold, heard it on the radio.
It was a long time comin, but it sounds so sweet, come on, man, get off my back.
All right, I saw the writing on the wall.
All night, I saw the writing on the wall,
I saw the writing on the wall.
In the midwest and in the east.
Canada, southwest, around the world,
L.a., tokyo, sounds so sweet,
Come on honey, get on your feet.
All right, I saw the writing on the wall.
All night, I saw the writing on the wall,
I saw the writing on the wall.
The words were oh, so...
The words were oh, so clear.
All right, I saw the writing on the wall.
All night, I saw the writing on the wall,
I saw the writing on the wall.
Lo and behold, heard it on the radio.
It was a long time comin, but it sounds so sweet, come on, man, get off my back.
Saw it at the airport, it was on t.v.
Read it in a magazine, runnin down the street.
Makes no sense, but I hope its gonna last,
The next big thing, I really gotta laugh.
Worked and slaved and played like hell,
Everybodys goin crazy, youre the last to know.
Cant explain it, still a joke to me,
Maybe Im naive, cause its so plain to see.
Its right in front of your face, man.
Its right in front of your face, man.
Played like hell, whoa!
Played like hell, whoa!
song performed by by Cheap Trick
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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I Only Wanna Laugh
(william jacob / shannon shor)
Change the mood Im in
For a little while
Let me see that grin
Let me see you smile
No soulful tales that fret and frown
No woeful wails that get me down
No rights or wrongs
Sing no sad songs for me
I only wanna laugh
No time for crying
I only wanna laugh
No time for tears
I only wanna sing
A song thats happy
Thats why I only wanna walk a street thats sunny
I only wanna see the side thats funny
Im saving all of my tears until tomorrow
cause crying all my tears
Just aint my style
Im acting like a clown
But let me be
cause even though I know
The jokes on me
I only wanna laugh
Only wanna laugh
Only wanna laugh
Im saving all of my tears until tomorrow
cause crying all my tears
Baby, just aint my style
Im acting like a clown
But let me be
cause even though the jokes on me, oh
Tell the girls goodbye
cause I dont wanna cry
Hey
I only wanna laugh
Only wanna laugh
Only wanna laugh
song performed by by Dusty Springfield
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Dedicated To Laughter!
Dedicated to laughter! Yes!
It gives your brain a tickle!
It brings a lotto happiness,
You've gotto have a giggle!
Don't hold it back! Let it be free!
Roll on the floor as well!
Then other folks will laugh with glee -
And think it's wonderfell...
Children are known to laugh the most -
They've learnt to tell jokes, too...
With limericks from coast-to-coast
To get the message through!
Yes, laughter lifts the lungs like songs...
Thus tensions melt away...
That's why all comics should get gongs
When honours are given in May...
If I get knighted, as it were,
The day I leave The Mall,
Be kind enough to call me, SIR!
Not Mister, mate or pal!
All wise-cracks pour from lightning brains
That see life's ironies,
Sifting out truths from lies like grains
With food for thought to please!
I'd like to think that humour spreads
Like smiles as joy imparts.
Some jokes are like fine thoroughbreds -
They're trained to thrill our hearts!
Blessed is the soul that's learnt to laugh
Yet cares for other folks -
It proves a noble epitaph
That one was known for jokes!
A precious pun's not always cute!
But sometimes it's OK...
So do your best to be astute!
You'll make somebody's day!
poem by Denis Martindale
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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On Being Told That There Is No Rhyme For The Word “Limerick”
After I heard Harry’s limerick,
I found that my mind set to simmer. “Rick, ”
I said to myself,
“One might write it itself, ”
But I answered, “You’re chances are slimmer, Rick! ”
So I can’t find a good rhyme for Limerick.
Told myself, “ You are just a beginner, Rick
And though there’s no reason
You can’t write something decent,
I fancy your chances get grimmer, Rick! ”
He said that it might rhyme with turmeric
But I thought, “You’re not that fast a learner, Rick:
Ditch your thoughts wasting time
Finding suitable rhyme;
Let your plans, man, stand on the back burner, Rick.”
But the cogwheels had started to turn a bit
As I guessed I had started to learn a bit
And I might find a line
That rhymes Limerick fine
And might win me a prize, so I earn a bit.
But I thought, “Though there was just a glimmer, Rick.
You will think till you’re needing a zimmer, Rick,
Since the muse isn’t kind,
I am sure you’ll will find
Not a word that will rhyme fine with Limerick.”
poem by C. Richard Miles
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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There Used To Be Days
There used to be days,
when i was a witty and humorous guy,
that i could make people laugh,
until they start to cry,
and i would often create stories
filled with such a humor and joy,
that everybody would ask me
how can u do it every time oh boy.
There used to be days....
Often i would tell things in such a way,
and often i would act in such a way,
that nobody could resist to laugh,
however hard they may try,
and even if it would be late for the day,
and even if i would be done for the day,
people used to hold me by hand,
and they wont let me say good bye.
There used to be days....
While i was cruising really very fast,
one day something happened that almost broke me apart,
and in those few hours of storm,
i lost whatever wit and humor i ever had,
i thought the things would improve,
but nothing happened as the days passed by,
and i the witty and humorous guy became a silent and shy guy.
but there used to be days...
now nobody laughs at my jokes,
however hard i may try,
and in such a despaired state i am,
that for myself often i cry,
But my heart says to me, keep on giving a try,
life would flip again someday,
and people would again start to laugh at my jokes,
whenever any i will say,
but till now only i can say
that there used to be days...
poem by Sunny Mittal
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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I'm always writing or playing because that is my life.
quote by Rick Wakeman
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Sitting In My Hotel
If my friends could see me now, driving round just like a film star,
In a chauffeur driven jam jar, they would laugh.
They would all be saying that its not really me,
They would all be asking who Im trying to be.
If my friends could see me now,
Looking out my hotel window,
Dressed in satin strides and two-tone daisy roots,
If my friends could see me now I know they would smile.
Sitting in my hotel, hiding from the dramas of this great big world,
Seven stories high, looking at the world go by-y.
Sitting in my hotel room, thinking about the countryside and sunny days in june.
Trying to hide the gloom, sitting in my hotel room.
If my friends could see me now, dressing up in my bow-tie,
Prancing round the room like some outrageous poove,
They would tell me that Im just being used
They would ask me what Im trying to prove.
They would see me in my hotel,
Watching late shows till the morning,
Writing songs for old time vaudeville revues.
All my friends would ask me what its all leading to.
Sitting in my hotel, looking through the window at the people in the street,
Seven stories high looking at the world go by,
Sitting in my hotel, looking at the world outside.
If my friends could see me now they would try to understand me,
They would ask me what on earth Im trying to prove.
All my friends would ask me what its all leading to.
song performed by by Kinks
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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I Come Alive In Writing
I come alive in writing
Even if the writing means nothing to anyone else-
I come alive in writing
Even if I am totally deluding myself as to its value-
I come alive in writing
Even if at times while writing there is an underlying hopelessness and despair -
I come alive in writing
As if writing is what God has given me to do-
I come alive in writing
As if through it I can truly give to and help others-
I come alive in writing
As if life has meaning through it-
I come alive in writing
Even when I sense the writing is not good or great
As I would wish it to be.
poem by Shalom Freedman
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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It wasn't until I became more confident with myself and I put myself forward instead of the jokes; at first it was put the jokes out there and I'm just behind the jokes.
quote by Wanda Sykes
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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I've been writing songs since I was 14 years old, and that's my true love.
quote by Rick Springfield
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Writing the book was itself a process of concealing and revealing.
quote by Rick Moody
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Something About Their Jokes Told
Why is it,
That those who once provoked...
Laughter and jokes,
On other folks...
Have become the ones,
Who today appear to fear?
Could it be,
Something they have done to someone...
Has managed to attract serious attention.
And faces of those once cracking with laughs,
Find something about their jokes told...
No longer thought to be as funny.
And today,
Those who they pass to exchange...
With others who gathered to laugh,
Seem to smile as if gasping onto bags...
Of contained laughter.
And appear happy for no apparent reason.
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Don't You Know?
despite my love for it
writing also gets tiresome
my seat is hot
because i've been sitting
for a long time
my head is on fire
my soul is burning
my heart is that burning
bush that Moses watched
those that see me here
only see a body sitting on
the cushioned gray computer
chair, hands running like a child
on the playground of keys
as though everything is
alright on the park
even without the teacher
or the mother
it as though there is no
problem
but really there are
in fact too many
the writing seemingly
not diminishing
nothing solved
my ring finger actually aches.
poem by Ric S. Bastasa
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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When Rick told me he was having trouble with his wife, I had to laugh. Not because of what he said, but because of a joke I thought of. I told him the joke, but he didn't laugh very much. Some friend HE is.
Jack Handey in Deep Thoughts
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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The hard part of writing at all is sitting your ass down in a chair and writing it. There's always something better to do, like I've got an interview, sharpening the pencils, trimming the roses. There's always something better to do. Going to a writer's club?
quote by Jerry Pournelle
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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By ignoring a lot of American culture you can write more interesting stories. Unfortunately, if you were writing about America as it is, you'd be writing about a lot of people sitting in front of television sets.
quote by Richard Russo
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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A real joke
Oldie we were really fooled
That sent chill and make us cool
We can do nothing but laugh
It is story of fools only half
Who prefers and loves to laugh?
Who wants to be alone and rough?
Take it as gift from almighty
Laugh it out as sign of nicety
Lessen out the burden
Which has come all of sudden?
Don't loose composure even
You will be really be happy then
Not to laugh it out is cruel joke
The sadness may remain as yoke
To keep confined if some one pokes
Then it may be really big stroke
We are certainly made to believe
It is fallacy and unreal world that we live
Not everything can go as per plan
You got to swim across the lake like swan
Your efforts may not be liked by all
They will cut jokes at your fall
They have nothing to do with your agony
The matters seems to them unreal and phony
poem by Hasmukh Amathalal
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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I've included these little jokes and mysteries in my writing for the amusement of readers.
quote by Armistead Maupin
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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