I think Elaine would go out with anyone if they showed interest in her. She's nuts. The woman's nuts.
quote by Julia Louis Dreyfus
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Related quotes
You Must Be Nuts? You've Got To Be!
You 'must' be nuts?
You've got to be!
You are telling me,
I can not have...
What has been given,
To my brothers and sisters...
Whether or not they had asked for it?
And this has been done,
IN my presence to disregard my loyalty?
You must be nuts?
You've got to be!
Not only am I going to have what I want...
But I am also going to remind you,
Once I get it...
Just what I think of your acts,
Of attempting to prevent me...
From not having the kind of life,
To do as I please!
You must be nuts?
You've got to be!
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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We Just Go Nuts At Christmastime
Up the driveway, down the walk
Oh, janets hair is like her moms
Whos got her own, but acts like somethings
Different from the eyebrows up
Seems like only yesterday
Our d-i-v-o-r-c-e
I love you both and yuletide is pure
H-e-double-l for me
And we just go nuts at christmastime
Thats when everything falls apart
We just go nuts at christmastime
But its another year before were together again
Hi, this is john of they might be giants
As youre driving down the highway at 100 miles an hour with your head wagging out the window,
We urge you, please, put down the phone
We just go nuts at christmastime
Thats when everything falls apart
We just go nuts at christmastime
But its another year before were together
Again
song performed by by They Might Be Giants
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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So Small Is One Pea
So small is one pea,
When it is in a soup with nuts.
To distinguish it as being insignificant,
Would depend on who valued the adding of it...
Had something to do with the enhancement of the flavor.
And without the addition of just that one pea,
Would the attention given to the nuts...
Be then diminished?
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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If your company has a clean-desk policy, the company is nuts and you're nuts to stay there.
quote by Tom Peters
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Out Of Chicken Nuggets
I could not make this up,
But...
I saw a woman going nuts,
Because her favorite restaurant...
Ran out of chicken nuggets.
She went ballistic when she learned this.
And was televised throwing a fit.
She broke the glass at a drive up window.
And punched the clerk because of it.
Some folks just can not handle stress.
And many aren't accustomed,
To being told 'no' and not yes!
And some today are clearly needing mental rest.
Yet...
There ARE some things people should not address.
And this is an example,
Of what one should not have done...
So publicly to get off her chest!
I could not make this up,
But...
I saw a woman going nuts,
Because her favorite restaurant...
Ran out of chicken nuggets.
'They ran out of nuggets!
And she found a reason to lose her mind! '
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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In most conventional novels, God is not allowed to be nuts. Nor are nuts allowed to be God.
quote by John Sladek
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Squirrel
Here I am, I’m the squirrel!
I store nuts in a hole,
Before it gets too cold.
I scurry from tree to tree,
Collecting all the nuts that be.
I put them in holes near and far,
So that I forget where many are!
Look up at me and I’ll give you some cheek,
Then run up a branch without a creak.
Some probably think I am a nut,
Burying like I have no head, but;
God made me,
And that is just who I will be.
See me here, see me there,
I’m everywhere!
I’m the squirrel!
poem by Joses Tirtabudi
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Remebering The Never Again
bring me in
let me in
I'll promise to defend for everything that's been given
your driving me nuts
your spilling my blood and guts
hello my friend
the demon have come to me
they made whispers louder then thunder
they told me i better not make another blunder
or my fun would be over
bring me in
let me in
I'll promise to promise to defend for everything was given
your driving me nuts
your spilling my blood and guts
hello again
I'm going to try to mend somethings
over and over again
i kneel down
just to feel something so real
a kiss goodnight
and the rooms goes dark
i shut the door
never to venture back anymore
bring me in
let me in
I'll promise to defend everything that was given
your driving me nuts
your spilling my blood and guts
hello for the last time
i guess things have changed
and that's fine
i really don't mind
kind as you are
your still to far
your picture i have captured in a jar
forever embedded in my jagged memories
bring me in
let me in
ill promise to defend everything that was given
your driving me nuts
your spilling my blood guts
but its finally over
over oh over
poem by Ace Of Black Hearts
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Tired of Nuts
If by birth I was a squirrel
With dreams someday I'd speak.
I would not spend time
Jumping from tree to tree
Or staring at birds searching worms
Pecked from the ground and pulled with beaks.
I'd gather all my nuts to munch,
And practice vowels from a branch...
'A-E-I-O-U' I'd do,
Adopting fresh skills to enhance!
And I would do this out loud, of course...
To keep stunned squirrels aware,
I had heights I wanted to achieve
And sights other than nuts to bite...
Before the season dropped their leaves from trees!
And visions of speeches,
To prepare and teach...
More squirrels I knew who grew tired of nuts,
Too close without a challenge to reach.
And 'that' I would suspect from a hunch!
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
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Pine Sap And Nuts
pine sap and nuts,
in unspoken corners.
tongues pierced with emotion,
and pent up clouds.
yesterlonging brushes your neck,
your long hair falling like rain...
or tears without names,
words without sound.
you taste like coffee and cigarettes,
on a dead poet Sunday.
morning falls with aching drench,
pine sap and nuts!
poem by Eric Cockrell
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Twisted Rhetoric
You can not tell folks they are nuts!
Not today.
Although their numbers growth,
To be observed in action.
They would rather take opportunities to prove it.
And do it as if someone has turned off their switch.
To leave those impulses once going to the brain...
Detoured to escape out of the ears to go ignored.
And taking that away from them...
The chance for them to prove themselves nuts,
Leaves them to sit longer in denial.
While dropping signs everywhere they can excuse,
With evasive and twisted rhetoric!
And other nonsense that exposes them,
For the morons they are.
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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The Clinton administration launched an attack on people in Texas because those people were religious nuts with guns. Hell, this country was founded by religious nuts with guns. Who does Bill Clinton think stepped ashore on Plymouth Rock?
quote by P.J. O'Rourke
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Even if the old woman has no teeth, her tiger nuts remain in her own bag.
I am a working woman. I take care of a home. I hold down a job. I am nuts.
quote by Barbara Dale
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Shades of Love
Oh thou my love
hast taught me much.
Even though nary a day
have I ever felt
your loving touch.
And through the years
I've come to see
my own true love,
he must be nuts.
But nuts or not
what matters more.
His compassion for others
is not a sport for keeping score.
Let them mock you
and turn away.
For they are shallow
in all that they say.
For your beauty is systemic.
And the ugliness of this world
has become an epidemic.
I'll protect you to the very last day.
And keep this cruel world ever at bay.
Until your soul has reached its zenith.
And your spirit flies away.
poem by Lynne FincherSpringarden
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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The Squirrel Said
The Squirrel said.
'Attention all! '
He stands tall.
On a wooden fence,
in suspense.
Their Squirrel Head,
Their squirrel said,
'My nuts are gone,
My nuts are gone! '
Did you check under your bed?
Another squirrel joking said,
'Of course I did! ' the squirrel said,
'I am the Squirrel head'.
Maybe you forgot you've ate,
Autumn now, it's not too late,
Just look for more, Squirrel Head,
An elderly wise squirrel said.
Elaine is just in pain. I think Elaine has become very, very sad woman. She is someone who is in deep need of many hours of analysis and I like to think that I'm not that type of person.
quote by Julia Louis Dreyfus
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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God's Nuts
This is my philosophy:
'If a squirrel can do the shimmy from an old Oak tree...
That same squirrel can shimmy from a Pine.
And still gather nuts from wherever they may drop!
They are 'still' God's nuts...Divine!
Regardless from where they are gotten.'
The moral of this?
Whether you sit in the orchestra seats,
Or in the balcony.
The price of the popcorn remains the same.
The only change you will get,
Depends on the price!
And how you are paying for it!
AND,
If you had expected butter...
You should have been prepared,
To bring your own!
OR...
You can sit back and absorb the experience.
Either way,
An OPEN mind is always learning something.
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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This or That
That is that. And this is this.
And that was that.
And this was this.
And that was this. And this
definitely was almost that.
And that was pretty much that.
And this was definitely this or that.
And that will, in all likelihood, be this.
But it's too bad that can't be that
as, nice, awfully, if this was this,
because if that wasn't that, this would be
this, pretty much.
Shall that not be this?
'Only if you really want it to,
be this, that is, if not, not.
And if this is that
by law commutative
musn't that be this?
Once That said to This
'Though I am That and you This,
we are much alike.
Let us marry our differences and thrive'.
'Are you nuts'? replied This, 'let's,
in the interest of proximity, not'!
poem by Morgan Michaels
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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New To The Neighborhood
I know you are new to the neighborhood.
And with that said...
I would caution you not to make any attempts,
To treat the other squirrels you see around here...
With respect or hints of it.
Since...
If you permit yourself to do that...
You just might find your nuts cracked.
'That's fine with me.
Isn't that the purpose?
I would consider that a neighborly act of unity.
And if I may admit this...
Sometimes it would be nice to sit and relax.
Knowing that another squirrel would do that for me.
And I didn't have to scratch any squirrel's back,
To keep my own nuts protected.'
Yeah...
You're new.
You've taken my comments...
Too far out on branches dislocated from the trees.
You must be a rehabilitated nut crusher?
Have you just been released,
From those Scotch Pines behind the Maples?
'No!
I'm a realist.'
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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