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Fatter
Fatter, fatter
Shake n bake, fatter
Shake n bake, fatter
Fatter
Corndogs, pizza, coca cola
Yogurt, butterscotch, granola
Look at me, Im fatter
Im fatter, Im fatter
Friends all gather round me
My enemies surround me
Yelling fatso, fatso, fatso
Ive eaten at every single greasy spoon on seventh avenue
Thats right, Im fatter
Dont you know my weight is going up, up, up, up, up
I tell you, this turkey sure is tough
Tough, tough, tough, tough, tough, tough
They got pizza on the west side
French fries up town
Corn dogs deep fried in batter
Im fatter
Go ahead, bite the big apple
Dont mind the calories
Pile it on my platter
Im fatter
Pile it up, pile it high up
song performed by by Weird Al Yankovic
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Films have gotten leaner and leaner, cutting out all variations from the story line.
quote by Neil Jordan
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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The Flea
A flea that bit you had bitten me too.
The two bloods mingled for single blood.
The flea’s body is our marriage lobby.
Neither shame nor sin would accrue since than.
Nor would you have grown any weaker too.
By yielding to me and getting my blood
You would shed no grace nor honour either.
You will make me than the flea happier.
Your yielding to me will not do more harm
Than what the flea has done to you, dear.
[the verse of John Donne, The Flea, rewritten]
20.12.2007
poem by Rm. Shanmugam Chettiar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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The Flea
Mark but this flea, and mark in this,
How little that which thou deniest me is;
It suck'd me first, and now sucks thee,
And in this flea our two bloods mingled be.
Thou know'st that this cannot be said
A sin, nor shame, nor loss of maidenhead;
Yet this enjoys before it woo,
And pamper'd swells with one blood made of two;
And this, alas! is more than we would do.
O stay, three lives in one flea spare,
Where we almost, yea, more than married are.
This flea is you and I, and this
Our marriage bed, and marriage temple is.
Though parents grudge, and you, we're met,
And cloister'd in these living walls of jet.
Though use make you apt to kill me,
Let not to that self-murder added be,
And sacrilege, three sins in killing three.
Cruel and sudden, hast thou since
Purpled thy nail in blood of innocence?
Wherein could this flea guilty be,
Except in that drop which it suck'd from thee?
Yet thou triumph'st, and say'st that thou
Find'st not thyself nor me the weaker now.
'Tis true; then learn how false fears be;
Just so much honour, when thou yield'st to me,
Will waste, as this flea's death took life from thee.
poem by John Donne
Submitted by Veronica Serbanoiu
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Fifi The Flea
(ransford)
Fifi the flea fell in love
With a clown from a flea circus fair
She gave him her heart
But he still couldnt see
That for such a long time she had cared
He put himself round all the other girl fleas
Unaware that he hurt her so badly
She cried in the arms of his manager friend
And declared that she loved the clown madly
One day fifi went
And this drove the clown wild
The poor little flea started crying
Never you mind his manager said
I ought not to tell but shes dyin
Dyin for love of you little flea
Youve broken her heart with your lyin
She couldnt stand to see you throw
Her love away without tryin
The day fifi died the little clown vowed
Hed tend her grave every hour
He broke down and cried
When he saw her grave
And on it he placed a small flower
Poor little flea he wasted away
Hed lost his fifi forever
So they opened her grave
Put him inside
Now at last they are together
song performed by by Hollies
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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A Flea (Fun Poem 120)
You get into bed with your partner
and they toss and turn
as if they have a flea up their arse.
They keep you awake
with their fidgeting,
eventually you get to sleep
and believe it or not
they start to do it again.
By now, you are ready
to give up trying to sleep
or get the bug killer spray
to kill that damn flea.
poem by David Harris
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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A flea can trouble a lion more than the lion can harm a flea.
Fat Man Blues
I'm getting fatter and fatter,
It's filling me with shame,
But it doesn't really matter,
It's the CALORIES that are to blame! !
So what if I drink a lot of wine
And munch too much when I eat my lunch -
Chocolate is so divine
And I like pork crackling to crunch!
It isn't fair that I'm so fat,
I never wanted to look like that! !
My doctor warns me that I may die
But I've got bigger fish to fry!
I wouldn't like to be thin as a rake
(That's why I eat a lot of cake) ,
Give me roast beef and Yorkshire pud,
Did anything ever taste so good?
To hell with going on a diet,
Gimme some bacon and I'll fry it! !
poem by John Thorkild Ellison
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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A change of Air
Now, a man in Oodnadatta
He grew fat, and he grew fatter,
Though he hardly had a thing to eat for dinner;
While a man in Booboorowie
Often sat and wondered how he
Could prevent himself from growing any thinner.
So the man from Oodnadatta
He came down to Booboorowie,
Where he rapidly grew flatter;
And the folk will tell you how he
Urged the man from Booboorowie
To go up to Oodnadatta -
Where he lived awhile, and now he
Is considerably fatter.
poem by Clarence Michael James Stanislaus Dennis
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Now I Have My Eyes On Dinner
When I say I am seeking something substantial in my life?
Why does that make you laugh to see me at a flea market?
I am seeking something that doesn't need to be high maintenanced...
Looking for wrinkles to moisturized.
To get nipped and tucked when bags begin to sag.
'And...
You are going to find that at a flea market? '
OH yes.
Some people don't know quality to throw it away.
Just like that.
Maybe recently divorced?
Or separated?
'You are talking about being at flea market,
Right! '
Ab-so-yes indeed-lutely!
And today must be my lucky day.
Because I am looking at a bargain.
A steal that's too genuine to leave.
And...
What do you think I've discovered?
'A day you found something priceless? '
Is there such a thing...
Of hoping to spend every moment,
With something so priceless...
To wish it is available?
'What can I say?
Your discovery is as good as mine? '
Are you sure you don't want to look around?
'What makes you think I haven't been doing just that?
I was hoping to see those candleholders you purchased,
Last week...
Again.'
So you had your eyes on 'them' too?
'Very much so.
Now I have my eyes on dinner! '
With breakfast?
'And lunch? '
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
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My War With The Fleas
Came August
the Flea Commander
slapped his walking stick
upon the table bare
surveying his battle plan
testing his jumping legs
assembled before him were
flea battalions on the ground
restless for the attack
mosquitoes and flies to buzz the air,
giant bedbug tanks from New York
gnats, moths, and crawlies eager for blood to suck
bat sentries, owl look-outs
coyotes to howl signals out
all was ready.
“Now, ” he began slowly
The family in there does not yet suspect
and we must not relinquish to them
our element of surprise.
We don't want them to get a chance to mobilize
until after we attack
and gain our cache of blood
surprise before they discover where our larvae lay
before they deploy their canisters of Raid
or insect repellents
before they open their bomb sprays
before their wash the beddings
before they deploy their expense flea sprays
and lethal flea droplets
we want to hide in their beds, dug in
we want to hide in their animals fur
in their clothing
everywhere
and before morning we will have established
our impenetrable beachhead.
So he said ready your selves for the strike this night
as they lay asleep.
With that he stood
his flea legs elevating him
above the others, shouting
Are you will me?
A roar went up
and I watching from my hiding place
crept away
saying to myself;
not this year you suckers
you’ll get your own surprise
glee in my voice.
To be continued.
poem by Lonnie Hicks
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A flea
A flea came my way
And I crushed it senseless
Later I had a pang of guilt
Cos it was vulnerable and quite defenseless
But in my defence I stopped its plight
For the sake of one meagre bite
I clipped it with my thumb
Until squashed and rendered numb
I kissed its soul goodnight
And with the [flea] angels it took flight
And left it's earthly home
To settle on celestial clouds
Where it could 'Hop, and Skip, and Roam'
yvette m smith feb 09
poem by Yvette Smith
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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The Flea Market (Fun Poem 68)
When I was just a little nipper,
I cycled along to see
a flea market on the green.
I parked my bike,
and then sat down in the tall grass.
No one had to me
that they gave away fleas there too.
Therefore, while I was sitting there
one jumped on my ass,
and when I got back to school
and went to park my bike.
The little beggar bit
and I went dancing around
doing the flea-a-me-jig.
I must have looked a sight for sure,
a sight for sore eyes
as I racked my rear end to bits,
jumping around like a bouncing ball.
I either got him,
or he fell of dizzy as hell,
but he never bit me again.
29 February 2008
poem by David Harris
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Interlopers
Two tables along
From two Dutch lovers whispering
And a housemaid pushing a broom,
Three sparrows hoop round a menu.
A flea-bitten dog climbs onto a seat,
Not ordering,
Lolling abundantly.
This is not reciprocal.
I do not perch on sparrow's branch,
Or slouch in the brown dog's kennel.
Moreover,
Not content with
Patronising the eatery,
Even now
Three sparrows are hopping about this page,
The flea-bitten dog is lolling across this poem.
poem by Sheena Blackhall
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The Little Turtle
A Recitation for Martha Wakefield, Three Years Old
There was a little turtle.
He lived in a box.
He swam in a puddle.
He climbed on the rocks.
He snapped at a mosquito.
He snapped at a flea.
He snapped at a minnow.
And he snapped at me.
He caught the mosquito.
He caught the flea.
He caught the minnow.
But he didn't catch me.
poem by Vachel Lindsay
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Loquacious
this afternoon, i talk a lot, and the more i talk,
the more words flowed from my mouth, the more i become less
of myself,
that is the irony of talking, the more i empty myself of this burden
using words, the lighter i become, the more useless i become of myself,
words and more words,
the more i have of them, the more meaningless my thoughts have become
and they who are listening have become more silent than ever,
i know, their minds are somewhere else, and i know that they know
that there is this spirit in front of them so restless,
wriggling like a worm, jumping like a horse, flapping like a bird
wanting to get rid of something: the fruit wanting to be free from the worm,
the horse from a gadfly, and the bird from the pricking flea....
what else can they say? they must have been saying.
we perfectly understand, we have been there, we were once a fruit
with a worm in our pulp, a horse with a gadfly in our tail,
a bird unable to get rid of the flea....
we were rotten once, we jumped the more, and now we are flying away.
what a life we have, we are never free, and we are never for even once
comfortable with what we are and what we have....
what we do not have of course, is what bothers us the most.
be it a horse, a bird, or a fruit, a flea, a worm, a gadfly of old
like what Socrates once mentioned before he took the fatal poison.
well he died, and here we are always trying to remember.
poem by Ric S. Bastasa
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Beauty in saree
In a velvet saree a girl is lofty,
Leaner than being lean, taller than being tall,
Her curves and contours well defined.
Men prefer women clad in sarees.
(A survey says)
27.09.2004
poem by Rm. Shanmugam Chettiar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Outside every fat man there was an even fatter man trying to close in.
Kingsley Amis in One Fat Englishman, 1963
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Stand In Line
Oh get down, getting down, so much money in the ground
For the people who dont deserve it now
Its a circus were the clowns as the giant ones disown
Every bit of something we call home
Said its a pity bout the middle class holden mass
We get a bit to play around with doesnt really matter
They kid us with their dole, kid us with the dope
But generally speaking, nobodys got a hope
Were playing the music of the middle-aged queens
Getting fatter and fatter and splitting their jeans
Its all the same, were out in the cold
The good ones died, the others just got old
Everythings set, everythings fine
You just got to stand in line
Oh everythings set, everythings fine
You just got to stand in line
Getting down, getting down, we have to make it now
Everybodys beaten, everybodys down, oh everybodys down
So goodbye to the creeps who are making it
Goodbye to the let it happen stand
Im moving out got no doubt theyve forgettn twist n shout
They never ever listen to the man
(moginie/hirst/rotsey/garrett)
song performed by by Midnight Oil
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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The Jolly Miller
It was a Jolly Miller lived on the River Dee;
He looked upon his piller, and there he found a flea:
'O Mr. Flea! you have bit' me,
And you shall shorely die!'
So he scrunched his bones against the stones--
And there he let him lie!
Twas then the Jolly Miller he laughed and told his wife,
And _she_ laughed fit to kill her, and dropped her carvin'-knife!--
'O Mr. Flea!' 'Ho-ho!' 'Tee-hee!'
They _both_ laughed fit to kill,
Until the sound did almost drownd
The rumble of the mill!
_'Laugh on, my Jolly Miller! and Missus Miller, too!--
But there's a weeping-willer will soon wave over you!'_
The voice was all so awful small--
So very small and slim!--
He durst' infer that it was her,
Ner her infer 'twas him!
That night the Jolly Miller, says he, 'It's Wifey dear,
That cat o' yourn, I'd kill her!--her actions is so queer,--
She rubbin' 'ginst the grindstone-legs,
And yowlin' at the sky--
And I 'low the moon haint greener
Than the yaller of her eye!'
And as the Jolly Miller went chuckle-un to bed,
Was _Somepin_ jerked his piller from underneath his head!
'O Wife,' says he, on-easi-lee,
'Fetch here that lantern there!'
But _Somepin_ moans in thunder tones,
'_You tetch it ef you dare!_'
'Twas then the Jolly Miller he trimbled and he quailed--
And his wife choked until her breath come back, 'n' she _wailed!_
And '_O!'_ cried she, 'it is _the Flea_,
All white and pale and wann--
He's got you in his clutches, and
_He's bigger than a man!_'
'_Ho! ho! my Jolly Miller,' (fer 'twas the Flea, fer shore!)
'I reckon you'll not rack my bones ner scrunch 'em any more!_'
And then _the Ghost_ he grabbed him clos't,
With many a ghastly smile,
And from the doorstep stooped and hopped
About four hundred mile!
poem by James Whitcomb Riley
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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