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A Comedy of Error
A couple went to the family doctor
Husband to get his usual insulin dose
And wife takes her contraceptive injection.
There is a new doctor in the absence of the Physician.
The new doctor is really an absent minded mediocre
Who does illegal abortions?
It seems by mistake the syringes being changed
And the husband got the contraceptive and wife the insulin.
Then after sometimes she conceived for the fifth occasion.
poem by Nimal Dunuhinga
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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The Hand That Feeds
Doctor, doctor, doctor
Please, doctor, doctor, please
Doctor, doctor, doctor
Feel like an old diseace
Get your sweet ass off the floor
Doctor, doctor, doctor
I cant refuse any loose harted lady anymore
I scream your name into the crowd
You feel the flame, but yo aint proud
Mabye your attitude aint right
So all thats left for me to do is bite
The hand that feeds me
Feeds me
Doctor, doctor, doctor
Doctor, doctor, please
All things you put me through
What the hell you want me to
Do all the things that uncle john needs
I aint the dog that bites the hand that feeds me
In the middle of, with a spittle of
Et tu like birds of a feather
When another day, love another way
Push, shove, make love, play
Never never, never ever
Never ever, never ever
Na, na...
Doctor, doctor, doctor
Please do a-what you can
Doctor, doctor, doctor
Would you please give my life a hand
All the things you put me trough
What the hell you want me to
Do all the things that uncle john needs
I aint the dog that bites the hand that feeds me, yeah
Doctor, doctor, doctor
Doctor, doctor, please
(repeat)
song performed by by Aerosmith
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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1985 Food Medley - 02 - Doctor
[parody of doctor! doctor! by the thompson twins]
Woah, cause hes my doctor, doctor,
And his name is bernie, bernie.
Oh, doctor, doctor,
Im feelin pretty dismal.
Doctor, doctor,
And his name is bernie, bernie.
Oh, doctor, doctor,
Wheres my pepto bismol?
song performed by by Weird Al Yankovic
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Neighbor, Neighbor
Neighbor, neighbor, why you messin in my life?
Neighbor, neighbor, youve been talkin to my wife,
Tellin her you seen me
Runnin wild the other night,
Runnin wild the other night.
A neighbor, neighbor, theress always one in every crowd.
A neighbor, neighbor, tellin lies and talkin loud.
You better watch your step now.
You might fall off your cloud.
You might fall off your cloud.
Now I was walking down a dusty road
When along came a neighbor of mine.
He saw me walkin with my head hung down,
He just had to stop and pass the time.
Neighbor, neighbor, floatin in the salty brine.
Floatin in the salty brine.
song performed by by ZZ Top
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Doctor’s Day,2010
Doctor, doctor, carer of sick!
Doctor, doctor, healer on earth;
Doctor, doctor, noble is thine field;
Doctor, doctor, serve thine brethren well!
Doctor, labor all the more;
Clean and dress the chronic sore;
Let no person taint thine name;
Never forget thine great aim.
Doctor, let not wealth allure;
Doctor, lead a life all pure;
Doctor, try to always cure;
God will bless thee on earth, sure.
Dear Dr.B, K, Padmavathi M.D.,
‘Happy Doctor’s Day,2010! ’
From the Dean and staff of IRT, PMC
Copyright by Dr John Celes 7-1-2010
poem by John Celes
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Dharma Talk # 2 (Cry For Help)
the growl in your stomach,
your neighbor's hunger.
the wet spot on your pillow,
your neighbor's tears.
the sharp pain in your heart,
your neighbor's eviction notice.
the sadness in your mirror...
your neighbor's cry for help!
WAKE UP!
poem by Eric Cockrell
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Doctor Doctor
Doctor doctor, please
Oh, the mess Im in
Doctor doctor, please,
Oh the mess Im in
She walked up to me
And really stole my heart
And then she started
To take my body apart
*livin, lovin, Im on the run
Far away from you
Livin, lovin, Im on the run
So far away from you
Doctor doctor, please
Oh, Im goin fast
Doctor doctor, please,
Oh, Im goin fast
Its only just a moment,
Shes turnin paranoid
Thats not a situation for a nervous boy
Doctor doctor, please
Oh, the mess Im in
Doctor doctor, please,
Oh, the mess Im in
But you look so angry
As I crawled across your floor
Shes got the strain,
And I cant take any more
*repeat
*repeat
song performed by by Ufo
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Doctor Robert
Ring my friend, i said you call doctor robert
Day or night he'll be there any time at all, doctor robert
Doctor robert, you're a new and better man,
He helps you to understand
He does everything he can, doctor robert
If you're down he'll pick you up, doctor robert
Take a drink from his special cup, doctor robert
Doctor robert, he's a man you must believe,
Helping everyone in need
No one can succeed like doctor robert
Well, well, well, you're feeling fine
Well, well, well, he'll make you ... doctor robert
My friend works for the national health, doctor robert
Don't pay money just to see yourself with doctor robert
Doctor robert, you're a new and better man,
He helps you to understand
He does everything he can, doctor robert
Well, well, well, you're feeling fine
Well, well, well, he'll make you ... doctor robert
song performed by by Beatles
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Your Heart With Your Mind and Faith Is Your Doctor!
Some say they would share this if they could.
They can not.
And wouldn't...
IF they could.
Some say they can feel yours!
They can not.
And wouldn't...
IF they could.
Some say they understand.
And if there is anything they can do,
To let them know!
Sincerety like this is difficult to dismiss.
But pain is personalized.
And not quite felt,
Like the one who is feeling it!
Some may empathize, cry and hold your hand.
Rub it.
Or give a hug to pat a back!
It's a fact of your condition.
You are there without a physician.
However,
When your pain comes...
Attaching your heart, body and mind to it?
There is no question who it belongs to!
But what more can a human being being human do?
Some say they would share this if they could.
They can not.
And wouldn't...
IF they could.
Some say they can feel yours!
They can not.
And wouldn't...
IF they could.
Some say they understand.
And if there is anything they can do,
To let them know!
Sincerety like this is difficult to dismiss.
But pain is personalized.
And not quite felt,
Like the one who is feeling it!
And when you are feeling yours...
You know it can not be felt,
Like it has you feeling it!
And somehow you know,
It is there not to be shared!
No matter who, what and how it is perceived.
Only you know 'why' pain feels like it does!
It is yours and it has been received.
And only you can create that feeling to make it heal!
You know it is there and that reality has no appeal.
Your heart with your mind and faith is your doctor!
Your heart with your mind and faith is your doctor!
Your heart with your mind and faith is your doctor!
Faith is your doctor!
Faith is your doctor!
Faith is your doctor!
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Allergies
Maladies
Melodies
Allergies to dust and grain
Maladies
Remedies
Still these allergies remain
My hand cant touch a guitar string
My fingers just burn and ache
My head intercedes with my bodily needs
And my body wont give it a break
My heart can stand a disaster
My heart can take a disgrace
But my heart is allergic
To the women I love
And its changing the shape of my face
Allergies
Allergies
Somethings living on my skin
Doctor please
Doctor please
Open up its me again
I go to a famous physician
I sleep in the local hotel
From what I can see of the people like me
We get better
But we never get well
So I ask myself this question
Its a question I often repeat
Where do allergies go
When its after a show
And they want to get something to eat?
Allergies
Allergies
Somethings living on my skin
Doctor please
Doctor please
Open up its me again
Maladies
Melodies
Allergies to dust and grain
Maladies
Remedies
Still these allergies remain
song performed by by Paul Simon
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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A physician without a knowledge of Astrology has no right to call himself a physician.
quote by Hippocrates
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Doctor, Doctor
Doctor, theres something wrong with me
My health is not all that it used to be
My heart is out of beat, I got chokers on my feet
My eyesights getting dimmer, I cant see
Doctor thanks for seeing me today, Im glad,
Ive got every sickness there is to be had
I had whooping cough last month
And today Ive got the mumps
And tomorrow Ill catch chicken pox as well.
Doctor doctor doctor make me well
Ive not got long to go now I can tell
Doctor doctor doctor make me well
Ive not got long to go I can tell
Ive not got long to go I can tell
Those pills I took have no effect at all
Just the other day I had a nasty fall
And I think I broke my jaw when it hit the kitchen floor
And Im shrinking last week I was five foot four
Ive been getting shivers lately, is it flu?
I know the bug is going round, what can I do?
Its about to pick on me, Ive still got the other three
Do you think I caught smallpox Id get flu?
[chorus]
Do you think its time that I made out my will?
Ill leave everything to you to pay my bill
Just how long is there to go
Please tell me I want to know
But on second thoughts dont tell me, Im too ill.
song performed by by Who
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Differences
My neighbor lives on the hill,
And I in the valley dwell,
My neighbor must look down on me,
Must I look up?--ah, well,
My neighbor lives on the hill,
And I in the valley dwell.
My neighbor reads, and prays,
And I--I laugh, God wot,
And sing like a bird when the grass is green
In my small garden plot;
But ah, he reads and prays,
And I--I laugh, God wot.
His face is a book of woe,
And mine is a song of glee;
A slave he is to the great 'They say,'
But I--I am bold and free;
No wonder he smacks of woe,
And I have the tang of glee.
My neighbor thinks me a fool,
'The same to yourself,' say I;
'Why take your books and take your prayers,
Give me the open sky;'
My neighbor thinks me a fool,
'The same to yourself,' say I.
poem by Paul Laurence Dunbar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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The young physician starts life with 20 drugs for each disease, and the old physician ends life with one drug for 20 diseases.
quote by William Osler
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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The art of healing comes from nature, not from the physician. Therefore the physician must start from nature, with an open mind.
quote by Philipus Aureolus Paracelsus
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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A physician is not angry at the intemperance of a mad patient, nor does he take it ill to be railed at by a man in fever. Just so should a wise man treat all mankind, as a physician does his patient, and look upon them only as sick and extravagant.
quote by Lucius Annaeus Seneca
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Dr. Detroit
Don't you stop
Don't you wonder why
Life itself pops in
And takes you by surprise
Don't you try to run
It gets you from behind
Like a common cold
It takes you for a ride
Now is the time
To call me doctor
This is a serious case
There's not much time
Now call me doctor
They love to watch him operate
It comes and goes
So call me doctor
They need a special technique
It grows and grows
Now call me doctor
Calling doctor, doctor detroit
Call me doctor (repeat)
No need to look
He's not in the book
The doctor's not an m.d.
What he does this time he does for free
Now is the time
To call me doctor
This is a serious case
There's not much time
Now call me doctor
They love to watch him operate
It comes and goes
So call me doctor
They need a special technique
It grows and grows
Now call me doctor
Calling doctor, doctor detroit
song performed by by Devo
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Highly Skilled AND Quite the Professional
When she squeezed my 'noogies'
I indeed had a fit.
I wanted her to immediately produce,
Her 'learning' certificate.
'Look at the wall to your right and cough.
No need to look at me,
As if you are pissed off.'
She insisted she was a doctor.
Dressed in black and not a white smock.
She told me to dropp my pants to examine...
My prostrate and other things I've got.
'Bend over. Spread those cheeks for me.'
~Do you understand how uncomfortable I am? ~
'I'm only here to do your prostrate examine.
Your primary doctor made this request.
And I'm a 'specialized physician'!
Mister Pertillar?
Get over it!
You can 'now' pull up your pants.'
I was hot!
Not for her.
Just hot.
And I was more shocked that she was beautiful.
That part of my prostrate appointment...
I came to hate.
But it was too late.
She was highly skilled AND quite the professional.
With a big diamond 'rock' on her left hand.
Out of my league.
And clearly not 'dating' material.
poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Soul Doctor
Well I woke up this morning
Took your advice
I dialed the number
And I let it ring twice
Then I hung up
Now I tried to do
Everything I could
To save our love
And make it feel good again
I cant fight it, theres nobody home
Hard hearted and all alone
I give you love, you aint giving it back
I cant take it
I need to see the soul doctor
Before the fever begins
You know Im searching for the soul doctor
When love is wearing thin
Doctor soul is in
Ive been kicked in the corner
Im down in the dirt
I cant feel a thing
But I know it ought to hurt
Now your shaking my spirit
Im breaking my back
Im too blind to hear it
So I over react to satisfaction
If I could get me some
I aint talking, theres nothing to say
Misunderstandin, your walking away
Maybe baby, its gonna take time, time, time
I need to see the soul doctor
Before the fever begins
You know Im searching for the soul doctor
When love is wearing thin
Doctor soul is in
I need to see the soul doctor
You know things are looking grim
I keep searching for the soul doctor
Doctor soul is in
The doctors soul intention
Let it be understood
Cant pull the strings of my heart
I aint made out of wood
Now I take what I get
To get what it takes
Need a little bit a love
Got a whole lotta heartaches
I cant fight it, theres nobody home
Hard hearted and all alone
Maybe baby, its gonna take time, time, time
I need to see the soul doctor
Before the fever begins
You know Im searching for the soul doctor
When love is wearing thin
Doctor soul is in
I need to see the soul doctor
You know things are looking grim
I keep searching for the soul doctor
Doctor soul is in
Hey, a little bit of soul, oh yeah
Doctor soul is in
Heart and soul doctor
I need to see the soul doctor, soul doctor
Doctor soul is in
Doctor, doctor, doctor, doctor save my soul
Doctor soul is in
Ooh
song performed by by Foreigner
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Doctor
Johnston/Midnight/Schwartz
I'm a man who lives in the city
I'm a man who lives in the street
From F.L.A. to Frisco Bay
And everywhere in between
Coast to coast there's a question
Everybody's always askin' me
People want to know everywhere I go
What can the answer be
Music is the doctor
Makes you feel like you want to
Listen to the doctor
Just like you ought to
Music is the doctor of my soul
Well it seems that when I travel
And I'm out there on the road
The freedom I need is the freedom I leave
In my good time rock and roll
There's a healing in those guitars
And a spirit in the song
No matter what condition your rhythm is in
The message goes on and on
Music is the doctor
Makes you feel like you want to
Listen to the doctor
Just like you ought to
Music is the doctor of my soul
If you ever wonder
How to shake your blues
Just follow this prescription
And get the cure for what's ailin' you
Music is the doctor
Makes you feel like you want to
Listen to the doctor
Just like you ought to
Music is the doctor of my soul
song performed by by Doobie Brothers
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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