Letter To The Penthouse Forum
Dear penthouse,
I never did believe anything I ever read in your magazine until just the other night.
When something happen to me that was so strange that I felt compelled to share it with your readers.
Im a student at state-u.
Maybe Im getting ahead of myself. it was one year ago tonight that my room mate stupendous dork and I were sittin around the dorm poppin a few frostys and burning some rope, and boning up for the speech therapy midterm exam the next day, by reading back issues of your magazine out loud to each other.
I looked at stu and he looked at me and we both knew neither of us was going to get a real good grade on that exam anyway. we hopped out of the dorm and went across the street to herbies tumble inn.
Right across from the dorm there, we came through the swinging doors and I couldnt believe my eyes, there they were, sitting at the bar, these two luscious babes, and they were siamese twins
I looked at stu and he looked at me and we looked at them and they looked at us and then one of the twins said wont you join us? and I just laughed and we went and sat down at the bar.
Turns out, one if the ladies was a speech therapy major and her sister said she had some rope in her purse there, and a big light bulb went off in my head and I said what the heck, why dont we all go back to the dorm?
Came out of the swingin doors at herbies and couldnt get across the street.
There was these 30 bikers with jackets that said harley aristocrats on the back. there was an aerobic dance class and there was the commanding officer of the campus rotc pushing a nautilus machine right down the double yellow line. I said what the heck, why dont we all go back to the dorm?
The last thing I remember is one of the twins screaming, hey general put your big heat seeking missile in my love silo!
I got my degree in spite of failing speech therapy that quarter. last night for the first time in a year, my room mate stupendous dork went back to herbies to toast our commencement. came thru the swingin doors and there they were at the bar, the same two siamese twins and I said oh no and I went and sat down a table.
The twins came over to the table and the one that was a speech therapy major looked my right in the eye and said: excuse me you probably dont remember us.
Name and address withheld by request.
song performed by by John Prine
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Related quotes
Twos and twins
Twins are not two; they are distinct from two.
Eyes are twins; breasts are twins; so are legs.
Two noses aren’t twins, nor two faces.
Twines are not together nor separate.
By friendship two cannot become twins
Bur sexual relation can make two twins.
Twins are held by a link so hard to split.
Lovers are twins, neither one nor two.
30.10.2008
poem by Rm. Shanmugam Chettiar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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That Cat Won't Sit On Your Lap
She warned me
That cat won't sit on your lap
She won't let you pick her up
And she won't let you sit on your lap
She likes to rub her head on you
But that's it
She won't let you pick her up
The cat looked at me
I looked at her
I let her rub her head on my leg
I look at her again and made a cat noise
She said, you'll see, she doesn't let anybody pick her up
I just looked at the cat
She looked at me
I reached to pick her up and she flinched
But she came back
I looked at her
And picked her up
She arched her back briefly
I rubbed her head, which she liked
The cat stayed on my lap
She said....how did you do that?
I said, I just did!
I looked a the cat
she looked at me
And we agreed not to tell
I put her down
As I did she knowingly looked back at me.
poem by James T. Adair
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Therapy
Therapy therapy
Lost sight-I think I'm getting out of my range
Colors flash-now things are starting to get strange
Start it up-and you say you wanna get in on me, I need I need I need my
Therapy-now just relax we'll put your mind at ease
Therapy-but first you've got to say "pretty please"
Therapy therapy
Fire it up-put a little gas on the brain
All aboard-a ride on the newest thang
Chew chew-lookt out it's a runaway train, pure pain, no gain, insane it's
Therapy-and right before they dig into my mind
Therapy-the Dr. screams "let's got it's party time"
Therapy therapy
Left right left right-like every heartbeat needs a motion
Left right left right-like every wave needs a sea
Left right left right-like every teardrop needs a eyeball
Left right left right-you've got to name your therapy
Therapy! Therapy! Therapy!
Therapy Therapy
Snap pop-a sweet emotion just broke loose
Don't care-it ain't nothing I can use
Ha! Ha!-ain't it funny how we all abuse you choose, abuse, you lose now
Therapy-you know we want to help we really care
Therapy-but when your money's gone you're out of here!
song performed by by Infectious Grooves
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Therapy (feat. Ozzy Osbourne)
Muir-Trujillo
Therapy therapy
Lost sight-I think I'm getting out of my range
Colors flash-now things are starting to get strange
Start it up-and you say you wanna get in on me, I need I need I need my
Therapy-now just relax we'll put your mind at ease
Therapy-but first you've got to say "pretty please"
Therapy therapy
Fire it up-put a little gas on the brain
All aboard-a ride on the newest thang
Chew chew-lookt out it's a runaway train, pure pain, no gain, insane it's
Therapy-and right before they dig into my mind
Therapy-the Dr. screams "let's got it's party time"
Therapy therapy
Left right left right-like every heartbeat needs a motion
Left right left right-like every wave needs a sea
Left right left right-like every teardrop needs a eyeball
Left right left right-you've got to name your therapy
Therapy! Therapy! Therapy!
Therapy Therapy
Snap pop-a sweet emotion just broke loose
Don't care-it ain't nothing I can use
Ha! Ha!-ain't it funny how we all abuse you choose, abuse, you lose now
Therapy-you know we want to help we really care
Therapy-but when your money's gone you're out of here!
song performed by by Infectious Grooves
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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I got thrown out of school several weeks in my senior year being caught in the girls' dorm. This was 1954, friends. The girls' dorm was off limits. Even to girls, I think.
quote by Robert B. Parker
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Train Leaves Here This Morning
I lost ten points just for being in the right place
At exactly the wrong time
I looked right at the facts there, but I may as well have
Been completely blind
So, if you see me walking all alone
Dont look back, Im just on my way back home
Theres a train leaves here this morning, and
I dont know, what I might be on
She signed me to a contract, baby said it would
All be so life long
I looked around then for a reason
When there wasnt something more to blame it on
But, if time makes a difference while were gone
Tell me now, and I wont be hanging on
Theres a train leaves here this morning
And I dont know, what I might be on
Ooo, ooo, ooo.. etc...
1320 north columbus was the address
That I wrote down on my sleeve
I dont know just what she wanted
Might have been that it was getting time to leave
And I watched as the smoker passed it on
And I laughed when the joker said, lead on.
Cause theres a train leaves here this morning
And I dont know, what I might be on
And theres train leaves here this morning
And I dont know, what I might be on
song performed by by Eagles
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Mole On My Thigh
Sitting on a sandy beach,
under a tropical sun,
watching the palm trees sway.
While someone with a romantic guitar,
serenades a couple of sweethearts,
locked in a loving embrace there.
I look around at the empty space,
there beside me,
wishing you were here with me.
Instead of a thousand miles away,
in the rain with someone else.
It takes two to start an argument,
both are guilty, not just one.
You walked away from my arms,
straight into his waiting there.
His smile looked more like a callous grin,
he had won and I had lost,
or at least that is what I thought.
Then came the telegram this morning,
to say you were coming here,
that you and he were through.
I can only wonder what went wrong.
So here, I am again sitting on the sand,
and then there along the beach I see you.
I wave and you come running,
straight towards me.
I stand, smile, and stretch out my arms,
all ready to catch you,
but you keep running passed.
I raise an eyebrow and looked around,
as into someone else’s arm you glide.
I scratch my head, get ready to sit down,
a tap on my shoulder,
makes me look around and there is you.
But who is that over there?
My twin sister, you replied.
I closed my eyes and give a grown.
Twins! Identical twins! I stuttered.
But how can I tell you apart?
She smiled, by the mole on my thigh.
All I could say was,
Oh my…
OH my…
OH my…
! 6 June 2007
poem by David Harris
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Where Does Time Go?
Where does the time go, It seem like just the other day, Your eyes were barely open, And I had no words to say.
You would lay there in my arms, As you looked up at me, That's when I knew what love was, As I looked back down at thee.
You have never cared about my stature, Or what I couldnt give, all u wanted was my love, And forever with me to live.
Looking back it don't seem so far, Since the first time I did kiss, Now your almost all grown up, All the cherished times I do miss! !
poem by Richard Goolsby
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Jumpin Jack Flash / Youngblood
(george: a couple of numbers from leon)
[jumpin jack flash]
I was born in a crossfire hurricane
And I howled at my mama in the driving rain
But its alright now in fact its a gas
And its alright, hey
Im jumping jack flash its a gas gas gas
I was raised by a toothless bearded hag
I was schooled with a strap right across my back
But its alright now in fact its a gas
And its alright, hey
Im jumping jack flash its a gas gas gas
But its alright now in fact its a gas
And its alright
Im jumping jack flash its a gas gas gas
[...]
But its alright now in fact its a gas
Its alright now in fact its a gas
But its alright now in fact its a gas
But its alright now, but its alright now
But its alright
[jumpin jack flash end - 3:48]
Well, you know that I love my woman
But just sometimes she just dont treat me right
Yeah, I woke up this morning and I looked her in the eye
She said sweet daddy, you got what I want
But you aint givin it to me
Oh, and it hurt me deep down into my soul
And I had [...] out of the door
I was [..] my heart [...]
Gonna ever see my baby no more
I went a-walkin down the street
And I was ashamed to look at anyoone I meet
Ooh, [..] and there she was standing
Leaning up against a lamp post
(well, tell it, tell it)
[youngblood - 4:35]
I saw her standing on the corner
A yellow ribbon in her hair
All night long my heart was shudder
Look at there, look at there
Youre the one, look at there
Youngblood, youngblood, youngblood
Woo, I cant get you out of my mind
And I couldnt sleep, I went on crying
And I saw the risin of the sun
All night long my heart was crying
Youre the one, youre the one
Youre the one, youre the one
Youngblood, youngblood, youngblood
Well, I cant get you out of my mind
[...] she looked so tough
I had to follow her all the way home
And when we were there
I met her dad, he said:
Youd better leave my daughter alone
And I couldnt sleep, I went on crying
And I saw the risin of the sun
All night long my heart was crying
Youre the one, youre the one
You are the one, youre the one
Youngblood, youngblood, youngblood
Woo, I cant get enough of your love
(youngblood)
Woo, youre breaking my heart in two
(youngblood, youngblood, youngblood)
[youngblood end - 7:08]
Ooh, and I looked at that 19 year old girl
Right in the eye.
And I said you look so sweet to me darlin
But theres one thing I got to tell you.
You know, Ive got me a fine old lady
Lying back there in that bedroom at home
And I think I got to get hack to her.
Ooh, you aint interested in my, she said.
[...] walkin home down the street, back to my pet
And I crawled and I snugged and I crawled back in the bedroom
My baby looked at me with her great big blue bedroom eyes
And she said:
Wooh, dad where have you been all night long?
Yet I know I told you to get away from me
I told you to leave me alone
Wooh, but I had a chain in your heart
And Ive been needin you all night long
[...] needin the good thing
I aint had none of the good thing
Yeah and I looked at my baby and I said
Baby, I said, what is it that Ive got that you want, yeah?
She looked at me and she said, real slow, real soft, real sweet
She said this right here:
[jumpin jack flash reprise - 8:24]
Yeah, its alright now, in fact its a gas
Well, its alright now, in fact its a gas
But, its alright now, in fact its a gas
Its alright, its alright now
[jumpin jack flash end - 9:14]
Yeah, now evrybodys got a young lady at home that they love
But sometimes the things, they just dont go right
But I want to tell you one thing, and its for sure
You treat your woman like you treat yourself
Evrything is gonna be alright
Yeah its gonna be alright now.
song performed by by George Harrison
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Strangers Eyes
All alone, a rainy night
No one around but I fell someone watching me
I look around, the street is bare nobody there
I wonder what it could be
As I turned to walk away
Suddenly I saw his face
Never minding that we were alone
Didnt care about the time, at the moment I was felling fine
I was looking into strangers eyes
(he caught me by surprise)
They looked right through me
(he looking into my eyes)
Never knew
Never, ever thought that love could be
(thats when he came)
He came and captured me
Like a scene out of a dream, I cant believe it
Kind of strange and familiar
But in his eyes I get a sign, I get a feeling
I get the feeling he knows me
Maybe I could stay a while, maybe I could make you smile
I dont have much to do
Maybe we could walk awhile
Maybe, maybe we could talk awhile
Cant help looking into strangers eyes
I was looking into strangers eyes
(he caught me by surprise)
They looked right through me
(he looked into my eyes)
Never knew
Never, ever thought that love could be
(thats when he came)
He came and captured me
How was I to know this would happen
Thought I didnt know I would meet this stranger
Its the kind of thing that dreams are made of
And I keep thinking about strangers eyes
I was looking into strangers eyes
(he caught me by surprise)
They looked right through me
(he looked into my eyes)
Never knew
Never, ever thought that love could be
(thats when he came to me)
He came and captured me
song performed by by Vanessa Williams
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Friendship
The Friendship
Sven and I were best friends sailed on the same ship together.
he as a third officer and I as a cook. We were both interested
in reading, cinema and politics, and we liked go dancing when
our ship docked. One night in Kingston, Jamaica, we met two
girls at a beach cafe, I liked my girl there was an easy repartee
between us and we laughed a lot. Back onboard Sven said my
the girl was not suitable for me, I smiled, thought it a joke.
Next day was Sunday Sven went ashore after breakfast, going
to the beach, he said, I had to stay onboard and cook dinner.
He came back in the evening, when I was ready to go ashore
and meet my new girlfriend; Sven said he was very tired and
wanted to stay onboard for the night. When I met my girl at
the cafe, she appeared startled looked around and behind me
but said nothing; told she had been to the beach all day and
was quite exhausted, the easy talk between us was gone and
the silence was awkward, so I wordlessly just got up and left.
Back onboard, Sven sat in the mess-hall drinking coffee and
reading, he looked up said halloo but continued to read;
In my darkened room I looked out, full moon and the lights
of Jamaica looked alluring; I also saw Sven go ashore again and
it was well after midnight.
poem by Oskar Hansen
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Eyes Like Twins
I recognize that smile
Our winter was oh so cold
You wore your mysterious cloak just like a child
No careless words were said
We spoke with eyes instead
We looked into each other like long lost friends
But then you went away
And I never heard
You had a summer haunt
You said the ice would kill
But you would not be caught
Chorus:
We have eyes like twins
Where your last thought ends my next begins always
Just one heartbeat away
From everything I mean to say oh
Catch me Im falling for you
Wish for me Ill come running to save you
Touch me Im calling for you
Remember me, I will never betray you
We have eyes like twins
I slept a thousand hours
My heart felt cold as a cowards
You sent a southern breeze like forest fire
I heard those voices too
I dreamed each dream with you
We breathe as one together and shed our tears
But then I woke with you
And my dream came true
Ill never hold you here
I know when winter comes that you will disappear
(chorus)
I see red, when youre in danger
And I see blue, when you are crying
All the pictures I believe
You are no stranger
You are no stranger
(chorus)
Catch me Im falling for you
Remember me, you are no stranger
We have eyes like twins
You are no stranger to me
Just one heartbeat away
song performed by by Wilson Phillips
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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I Looked At You
i looked at you,
and saw the fugitive
in my mirror.
i looked at me,
and saw the child in you.
i looked at God,
and saw the stranger waiting.
i looked at the stranger,
and saw my brother in need.
i looked at freedom,
and saw the bars of the cell.
i looked at the bars,
and saw my spirit walk free.
i looked at anger,
and saw forgiveness waiting.
i looked at forgiveness,
and saw the hands of love.
i looked at my body,
and saw the bird leaving the nest.
i looked at the nest,
and saw a world made of straw.
i looked at today,
and saw the scars of yesterday.
i looked at yesterday,
and saw the dawning of tomorrow.
i looked at the seed,
and saw the plant in fullness.
i looked at fullness,
and saw emptiness the seed.
i looked at you...
poem by Eric Cockrell
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Swingin
Well, she was standing by the highway
In her boots and silver spurs
Gonna hitchhike to the yellow moon
When a cadillac stopped for her
And she said, hey, nice to meet you, are you goin my way?
Yeah, thats when it happened
The world caught fire that day
And she went down swingin
Yeah, she went down swingin
Well, she was over twenty-one
In trouble with the law
And it didnt faze her none
She called her mother-in-law
And said I need a little money
I knew I could count on you
After that night in vegas
And the hell that we went through
We went down swingin
Like benny goodman
Yeah, we went down swingin
Moonlight on the interstate
She was cross the georgia line
Looked out the window feeling great
Yeah, it had to come in time
And she said Im never goin back
She said at last Im free
I wish ma could see me now, shed be so proud of me
She went down swingin
Like glenn miller
Yeah, she went down swingin
Like tommy dorsey
Yeah, she went down swingin
Like sammy davis
She went down swingin
Like sonny liston
song performed by by Tom Petty
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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the Touch**********************1979
i looked up into the deep blue sky
little white clouds were floating by
i looked upon this young girls face
she held it down in disgrace.
i looked upon her cheeks so fair
she looked up to me to see if i care
i looked at her with content
and she knew right there it was heaven sent.
she smiled at me, and our eyes then touched
we knew then, it was much to much.
our hearts entwined and her lips met mine
we felt right there it was a love divine.
poem by Louis Rams
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Wiped Out
Wiped out!
I went to a party, just so smartly, cool as cool could be
I knew I could make it, knew I could shake it, lose some fancy free
So I went to the table and reached for a bottle
And poured me a glass of wine
Took a few sips and looked around, I was feelin fine
But an hour along, comin on strong, I was gettin drunk
The next thing I knew I looked at you, I was blind as a skunk, I was
Chorus:
I was wiped out, I had my lights out
Was fallin right out, cos I was wiped out
Through the smoke-filled room I caught your eye
And I think that you caught mine
And I knew in a minute or maybe less, it was just a matter of time
Then you started to move with such a groove, stronger than sneakin slow
Then you looked at me with your big blue eyes, they had such a glow
Then I took your hand and tried to stand and ended up sittin back down
Then you smiled at me and gave me a wink, how quick I lost my frown, I was
Chorus
So I looked at you and then I knew that we were gonna have some fun
So I thought to myself, wine was out, we should switch to rum
So without a word, and like some bird, we flew to another place
And pretty soon we were in some room stretched miles out in space
The room was turnin, we were burnin, things became a haze
It seemed that already I had too many, firewater caused the blaze, I was
Chorus repeats out
song performed by by Kiss
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Look Forward
'Hi friend, how are you? '
Looked back; To my surprise - 'You? '
'Yeah, yeah, you never turned back'.
'Sorry late night, so didn't look back '.
After years I saw him, very thin.
On a single blow to flee unseen.
'Working where' I asked.He silenced.
May be of no job, I guessed
He walked back and forth.
Looked funny and fishy in truth.
He worded, 'what are you doing?
O' know in a paper mill you're working '.
I doubted him to spy me long.
A school mate viciously wrong,
Left out and forgotten by everybody,
Now holding me. Around us was nobody.
Hour passed, he said bye.' Hold on
What are you' I went on.
'Ghosting' answered to vanish. Felt something
God! since then I don't look back!
poem by Indira Renganathan
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Bootsy The Family Dog
Bootsy is the family pet,
I made sure she was fed,
when I thought she was pregnant.
Bootsy had puppies every year,
by a shaggy dog named Coco
who was the Jon Juan so dear.
Puppies where given to friends of my brother,
they looked liked twins, they looked like each other.
Bootsy jumped and ran and played
in the open fields during the day.
As time went on a fence went up,
Stopping her to run and jump.
She gained weight then got sick,
could hardly walk, was sad from it.
I came to see her in 1988,
she lay by couch, not looking great.
I have a photo of her, Allisa and me,
Memory I keep of us girls, all three.
Written by Suzae Chevalier on September 11,2011
poem by Suzae Chevalier
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I Met A Man.
Along the road called Life I met a man today,
He asked if I were going his way.
I took a minute and looked him up and down,
Just to ask myself if he were someone I wanted to be around.
His heart was black with sin,
There seemed very little if any goodness within.
The years had etched upon his face,
And you my friend are failure and disgrace.
Now I noticed him looking back into me,
I was not going to be allowed to think my thoughts for free.
He looked at me and read my thought,
He spoke and this is what he taught.
You my son are me and I am you,
Your skin brown or your eyes deepest blue.
Each has choices to make,
And doors with paths to take.
The more I looked upon this ragged old man,
The more I understood this was part of God's plan.
Fair to say a God given plea,
That I see this old man was me.
[RKH] 2/07/2003
Psycho Therapy
Psycho Therapy
Psycho Therapy
Psycho Therapy
That's what they wanna give me
Psycho Therapy
Psycho Therapy
Psycho Therapy
All they wanna give me
I am a teenage schizoid
The one your parent despise
Psycho Therapy
Now I got glowing eyes
I am a teenage schizoid
Pranks and muggings are fun
Psycho Therapy
Gonna kill someone
Psycho Therapy
Psycho Therapy
I like takin' Tuinal
It keeps me edgy and mean
I am a teenage schizoid
I am a teenage dope fiend
I am a kid in the nut house
I am a kid in the psycho zone
Psycho Therapy
I'm gonna burglarize your home
Psycho Therapy
Psycho Therapy
song performed by by Ramones from Subterranean Jungle
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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