It's All Relative: : Humour
My mother’s brother’s sister’s name is Grace
She’s my aunt and likes to go from place to place
My mother’s sister’s brother’s name is Brad
He’s my uncle and he is my cousin’s Dad
My grandmother on my mother’s side
Is my maternal gran, she is my grandfather’s bride
She also is my father’s mother-in-law
And not surprisingly they often go to war
My cousin is the nephew of my mother
His father happens to be my mother’s brother
My aunty’s niece is in fact myself
If you're confused please don't look at me for help
(Sydney, Australia - 2005)
poem by Alessandra Liverani
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Related quotes
Rednecks unite!
My father is my brother
My sister, with three ears,
Is his significant other.
My sister is my mother
And somehow, also my brother
My father's father am I
The vile thought makes me shudder.
Grandma was a mule,
Grandfather's sperm, she used as fuel
A french aristrocrat,
Made love to my mother, for he prefered his women fat
A letter written for my eyes
Containing news of demine
Said my true mother was some other
And my father, not her brother.
Jubilant and joyous,
My wife is what used to by my sister.. Or brother?
poem by Thy Mother
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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My Brother Sarah - Sway B-side
My brother sarah
Doesn't know what clothes to wear
It's a dilemma
To get the stuff to match your hair
But mother and father
Sister and brother
Say they just don't know
My brother sarah
Really wish you understood
Why he's got to show it
For it to be any damn good
But mother and father
Sister and brother
Say they just don't know
My brother lies awake at night
Wishing this world could just be right
But mother and father
Sister and brother
You and all the others
Say you just don't know
song performed by by Ocean Colour Scene
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Orphan Girl
(gillian welch)
I am a orphan
On gods highway
But Ill share my troubles
If you go my way
I have no mother
No father no sister
No brother
I am an orphan girl
I have had friendships
Pure and golden
But the ties of kinship
I have not known them
I know no mother
No father no sister
No brother
I am an orphan girl
But when he calls me
I will be able
To meet my family
At gods table
Ill meet my mother
My father my sister
My brother
No more an orphan girl
Blessed savior
Make me willing
And walk beside me
Until Im with them
Be my mother
My father my sister
My brother
I am an orphan girl
Be my mother
My father my sister
My brother
I am an orphan girl
I am an orphan girl
song performed by by Emmylou Harris
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Family Man
Written by lindsey buckingham and richard dashut.
Walk down this road
When the road gets rough
I fall down
I get up
I am what I am...
A family man
I am what I am...
A family man
Mother... father... brother...
Mother... father... brother...
Walk down this road
In the cool of the night
Dont know whats wrong
But I do know whats right
I am what I am...
A family man
I am what I am...
A family man
Mother... father... brother...
Mother... father... brother...
I am what I am...
A family man
I am what I am...
A family man
Mother... father... brother...
Mother... father... brother...
song performed by by Fleetwood Mac
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Sisters And Brothers
I wish I had a sister, who would be there all the time
I wish I had a brother, who would be all mine
I wish I wasnt alone anymore just as I am
so mabey I need to take a stand
all I have is my mother.
My sister and brother are both gone
not one of them here when I get home
sometimes not even my mother
I have to have a sister or brother.
My sister and brother both are gone
but they wont be alone for long
for even though I never saw them from the start
they will always be here in my heart.
poem by jamika Eichelberger
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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You Are My Mother
You are my mother
More supportive than a brother
You are my mother
More compassionate than a sister
You are my mother
My very important other
You are my mother
My first teacher and helper
You are my mother
Because of you I am greater and stronger
You are my mother
Because of you I am richer and better
You are my mother
My love for you grows bigger and sweater
You are my mother
My love for you will last forever
poem by Howard Simon
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Mother Is Giving Birth To Your Brother Or Sister
Mother is giving birth
To your sister or brother
I know that you are mother's little girl
And you want a brother so badly
Mother can't tell you if you are going to have
A brother or a sister right now
And I am excited for us also
poem by Aldo Kraas
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Lover, Brother
Are you my brother or lover, brother?
don´t be my mother lover!
kiss you my brother lover
can´t be your mother, brother
never found you in the arms of another
Are you my lover, brother?
don´t touch my mother lover!
kiss you and not another
find out the love to your mother, brother
don´t even mistreat my brother, mother
Are you like my brother, lover?
don´t hate my mother lover!
kiss me instead of my mother, brother
not even be afraid of my brother, mother
we are the same but another
Are you my friend sweet brother?
please get in touch with my lover!
but do not kiss each other, brother
´cause he´s my lover, brother
treat him as your brother, my lover
Why aren´t lovers like brothers?
why mothers not like lovers!
kissing my man and not another, brother
but love you too my mother, never another
together we can treat us like brothers, brother.
@floydfloydson
(c) uni-verse.de 12.20.2011
poem by Floyd Floydson
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Man’s Role
The elder son of each family
Jointly made a moral code
By which they must not eat
Each other and instead
They could live on their brothers and sisters,
Who are meant to serve them.
The elder sons of the family
Made it a law of their father
With no concern to their mother.
The mother was furious.
The time is not far to neglect
The elder son altogether.
[Father is the God, Mother is the Earth,
the elder brother is man, brother is animals and sister is vegetation]
15.12.2005
poem by Rm. Shanmugam Chettiar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Ask A Mother
If you're looking for a juggler
If you know 'bout superpower
If some problems cause you anger
Ask a Mother.
If you're down and in the gutter
If Life's worry's getting bigger
If you think quitting is better
Ask a Mother.
If the hurts they make you bitter
If your love's 'not ever after'
If your Hopes fade like a flower
Ask a Mother
If you find there's no one there
Or you may have lost your mother
Gone is father, brother, sister
Talk to God, He is your Father.
poem by Cynthia Buhain-Baello
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Mother In Law
(a. toussaint)
Mother in law, mother in law
Mother in law, mother in law
The worst person I know
Mother in law, mother in law
She worries me so
Mother in law, mother in law
If she leaves us alone
We could have a happy home
Sent from down below
Mother in law, mother in law
Mother in law, mother in law
Satan should be her name
Mother in law, mother in law
To me theyre about the same
Mother in law, mother in law
Everytime I open my mouth
Steps in trying to put me out
How could you stood so low
Mother in law, mother in law
Mother in law, mother in law
Come home with my pay
Mother in law, mother in law
She asks me what I made
Mother in law, mother in law
She thinks her advice is a contribution
If she would leave that would be the solution
Dont come back no more
Mother in law, mother in law
Mother in law, mother in law....
song performed by by Huey Lewis And The News
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Mother Once Said...
My mother once said
'Don`t open your mouth before
Elders and those with white hairs'.
My mother also said
'Don`t speak unless asked'.
My mouth asked me once,
'What is my role in your life? '
I said, 'My mother has said nothing about it'.
I added, 'You swallow and eat'.
My mouth has been quiet since.
My friends said, 'Your mother is wise'.
My father said, 'She is my strength'.
I wondered how she could be so great!
Then was born my kid brother with a big mouth.
My mother said to my kid brother too
Not to do those old things
But his mouth spoke everything
Everything that I never dared.
And his mouth swallowed, ate and spoke.
Today my mother is no more
And my father is is weak and worn out.
I still remember my mother`s words.
While my kid brother speaks out his mind
My mouth refuses to speak out its regrets....
poem by M.d Dinesh Nair
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Missing Link
A sickly child lie
frail on the sofa in the living room.
A knock on the door,
His mother opened.
The man who entered the child knew it was his father.
Whose child is this?
“It is your youngest son” his mother said.
The children in the street
all had a father; the child had waited for him.
But his father ignored him,
gave chocolate to his sister and brother,
then he drank from a bottle,
his mother threw him out.
Next day asked his mother, ” are you sure he is my father? ”
She slapped her son’s face and cried.
poem by Oskar Hansen
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On His Father's Side
On his mother’s side
Born in Bethlehem
On his Father’s side
No one before him
On his mother’s side
Growing and learning
On his Father’s side
All knowledge showing
On his mother’s side
Stuck in one location
On his Father’s side
Present in every nation
On his mother’s side
He was hungry
On his Father’s side
The multitudes he did feed
On his mother’s side
At Calvary he died
On his Father’s side
He was the essence of life
On his mother’s side
Buried like other men
On his Father’s side
He rose again
On his mother’s side
Human and weak
On his Father’s side
The God of eternity.
poem by Joses Tirtabudi
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Family consists of
Family consists of
Father mother son wife
Sister brother.
Knowledge is father
Truth is mother
Tolerance is son
Brother is religion
Peace is wife
Sister is mercy.
This is my family
Please come and see.
poem by Gajanan Mishra
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What is a mother?
What is a mother? A mother is a friend.
What is a mother? A mother is your hero.
What is a mother? A mother is someone who can make your wishes comes true.
What is a mother? A mother is sugar and spice.
What is a mother? A mother knows all the coolest music and style.
What is a mother? A mother is everything in between.
What is a mother? A mother is a better version of you.
What is a mother? A mother is your mommy till the day that you leave this world behind.
poem by Natasha Ligons
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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What is a mother? pt 2
What is a mother? A mother is a friend.
What is a mother? A mother is your hero.
What is a mother? A mother is someone who can make your wishes comes true.
What is a mother? A mother is sugar and spice.
What is a mother? A mother knows all the coolest music and style.
What is a mother? A mother is everything in between.
What is a mother? A mother is a better version of you.
What is a mother? A mother is your mommy till the day that you leave this world behind.
poem by Natasha Ligons
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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My Dear Brother
LET ME TELL YOU ABOUT MY FATHER
LET ME TELL YOU ABOUT MY MOTHER
THEY ONLY HAD TWO CHILDRENS A SISTER AND A BROTHER
BUT FATHER HAD PASS AWAY NOW
MOTHER ALSO WHENT ONE DAY TO
THAT JUST LEFT ME AND A BROTHER
AND WE WHENT ARE SEPARATE WAY TOO
10 YEARS HE CHOOSE THE JAIL LIFE
IHE NEVER CAME BACK HOME
NEW JERSEY FOR MY BROTHER
WE WERE BORN TO ROAM
WITH LETTER AND WITH PICTURES
WE ALWAYS KEEP IN TOUCH
MISSING GROW UP TOGETHER
AND THINGS THAT MEANT SO MUCH
MAYBE WRITTING DOWN THIS POEM
IN MY OWN AND SIMPLE WAYS
WILL TELL HIM ABOUT MY FEELINGS
I NEVER GOT TO SAY
BUT HOW YOU PUT ON A PAPER
THAT U REALLY MISS HIM,
OF ALL THE TIME THAT PASS WITHOUT YOUR BIG BROTHER
FROM IN MY HEART I FOUND THIS POEM
AND HOPE HE KNOWS ITS TRUE
WITH ONLY FOUR SMALL WORDS
BROTHER 'I LOV3 YOU! ! ! '
Oh, dear mother
Oh, dear mother
I lost my brother
He is alive and well
But as far as I can tell
To see me he has no desire
Oh, dear mother
My younger brother
I have to confess
Can care less
If nieces miss their uncle
Oh, dear mother
Please, tell my brother
He could be smart
But a life with no heart
Not a life, but a worst nightmare
Oh, dear mother
I love my brother
Dmitri, Dmitri
Nu chto ze ty pravo…
poem by Slava Olchevski
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Male parental hierarchy.
My parents are two, grandparents four
And great grandparents, eight and so on.
I am known by my father, his father,
And his father and so on by male side.
My mother, her mother and father, their
Mother and father and so on are ignored.
My fathers’ mother and grandfather’s
Mother and so on go to oblivion.
I am known by my father, his father
And his father and so on as a family.
All women from whom I have drawn
Their genes have been shut out.
Parental hierarchy is represented
By male, women dislodged at every stage.
25.08.2009
poem by Rm. Shanmugam Chettiar
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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