The SpongeBob SquarePants Theme
Are you ready kids
Aye aye captain
I can't hear you
Aye aye captain
Ohhhh Who lives in a pinapple under the sea?
SpongeBob SquarePants!
Absorbent and yellow and porus is he!
SpongeBob SquarePants!
If notical nonsense be something you wish
SpongeBob SquarePants!
Then drop on the deck and flop like a fish!
SpongeBob SquarePants!
SpongeBob SquarePants!
SpongeBob SquarePants!
SpongeBob SquarePants!
Sponge-Bob Square-Pants!
song performed by by Avril Lavigne
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Related quotes
In case you haven't caught the commercials, I'm in the new SpongeBob SquarePants Movie.
quote by David Hasselhoff
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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The SpongeBob Movie: Sponge Out of Water [Bicycle]
from The SpongeBob Movie: Sponge Out of Water (2014)
Submitted by Veronica Serbanoiu
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The SpongeBob Movie: Sponge Out of Water
Antonio Banderas, Clancy Brown, Tom Kenny, Thomas F. Wilson, Bill Fagerbakke, Christopher Backus, Slash
from The SpongeBob Movie: Sponge Out of Water (2015)
Submitted by Veronica Serbanoiu
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The SpongeBob Movie: Sponge Out of Water [trailer 2]
Antonio Banderas, Clancy Brown, Tom Kenny, Thomas F. Wilson, Bill Fagerbakke, Christopher Backus, Slash
from The SpongeBob Movie: Sponge Out of Water (2015)
Submitted by Veronica Serbanoiu
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Dear Self
Life might be shitty now,
But it might get better.
Just think about the fun,
You had when you were little.
Think about Joey,
Speedy,
Emily,
Sassy,
Andy,
Your friends,
Who love you.
Think about Grandma,
And Grandpa.
About the time,
You lost your tooth,
When you bit into a rib.
When you and Joey,
Got stuck under the bed.
Or when you and Joey,
Wne t on an adventure,
To rescue a King,
From a dragon.
Or when you and Joey,
Went through a portal,
And fought,
Space monkeys.
Or when you nd Joey,
Watched Spongebob.
Or when Sassy,
Always watched Grandma,
When she would feed you.
Or when you rescued,
That kitten.
Or when you,
Healed that baby bird.
Or helped that dog,
Find his owner.
Just think of the,
Happy things in life.
From,
Past shitty life.
poem by Dragon Crenshaw
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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~A family that doesn't belong~
By: Michelle (Miss. Shelly)
A family that doesn’t belong,
But always knowing we didn’t do a thing wrong!
Your in our family so strong and caring,
Each and every problem is worth you sharing!
I know I have you,
but know that you have us too!
We wont leave your side through our life travels,
Even when our life feels as if it unravels!
No one can get through this thing with out,
We wont leave you in this world to just sit and pout!
This world gets tough and this we all know,
But our family that doesn’t belong will help you make it go!
No secrets will be hidden and for this I know,
We will help you up when you get to your all-time low!
All our little family is a wondrous gift,
Something that only we can uplift!
This is something not even the preps can’t measure,
But the rumors is just their little pleasure!
I know it will hurt and cut you inside,
But your lost family is here for you to confide!
This is our family that doesn’t belong,
But we can get through singing a inspirational song!
This family that doesn’t belong finally has been found,
And no one in this family will let you hit the ground! ! !
To: Rachael (noodle)
Rachel (Hobbs)
Gina (daffy duck)
Stephanie (Mrs. Niccals)
Maria (Mia mango)
Chelsea (Mrs. Squarepants)
Brianne (brianne banana)
poem by Michelle Guza
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Dear Life..
Dear Life,
Thanks a lot.
Thanks for computer crashes and plane crashes,
for dirty feet and dirty minds, for cold weather and
cold mothers. Thanks for enery drinks that taste like s-t.
But thanks as well for small talk with strangers in the
Express lane at Ralph’s, thank you for bath and body works
chapstick and cherry sarcasm. Thanks for being
a dime short of my favorite brand of chips at the
vending machine, thanks for loud chewers and irratating siblings.
Gracias for best friends that don’t realize you love them more than a best friend.
Merci Beucoup for last minute holiday shopping and snatching the last pair of skinny jeans....
Thank you for obnoxious relatives who ask where
you’re going to college or what career you’ve picked
when all you want to do is lie in bed and watch
reruns of “Full House” and “Spongebob.” Thanks for
the last seat free on the subway. Thanks for cheap
knockoffs of designer jeans and fake Louis V purses. But most of all, Life,
thank you for the 1: 1 ratio of real thanks and no thanks.
Thanks a lot.
O Captain! My Captain!
O Captain! my Captain! our fearful trip is done,
The ship has weather’d every rack, the prize we sought is won,
The port is near, the bells I hear, the people all exulting,
While follow eyes the steady keel, the vessel grim and daring;
But O heart! heart! heart!
O the bleeding drops of red,
Where on the deck my Captain lies,
Fallen cold and dead.
O Captain! my Captain! rise up and hear the bells;
Rise up—for you the flag is flung—for you the bugle trills,
For you bouquets and ribbon’d wreaths—for you the shores a-crowding,
For you they call, the swaying mass, their eager faces turning;
Here Captain! dear father!
This arm beneath your head!
It is some dream that on the deck,
You’ve fallen cold and dead.
My Captain does not answer, his lips are pale and still,
My father does not feel my arm, he has no pulse nor will,
The ship is anchor’d safe and sound, its voyage closed and done,
From fearful trip the victor ship comes in with object won;
Exult O shores, and ring O bells!
But I with mournful tread,
Walk the deck my Captain lies,
Fallen cold and dead.
poem by Walt Whitman
Submitted by Dan Costinaş
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Im Your Captain
Everybody, listen to me,
And return me, my ship.
Im your captain, Im your captain,
Although Im feeling mighty sick.
Ive been lost now, days uncounted,
And its months since Ive seen home.
Can you hear me, can you hear me,
Or am I all alone.
If you return me, to my home port,
I will kiss you mother earth.
Take me back now, take me back now,
To the port of my birth.
Am I in my cabin dreaming, or are you really scheming,
To take my ship away from me?
Youd better think about it, I just cant live without it.
So, please dont take my ship from me.
Yeah, yeah, yeah ...
I can feel the hand, of a stranger,
And its tightening, around my throat.
Heaven help me, heaven help me,
Take this stranger from my boat.
Im your captain, Im your captain,
Although Im feeling mighty sick.
Everybody, listen to me,
And return me, my ship.
Im your captain, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Im your captain, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Im your captain, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Im your captain, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Im getting closer to my home ...
Im getting closer to my home ...
Im getting closer to my home ...
Im getting closer to my home ...
Ohhhh ...
Im getting closer to my home ...
Im getting closer to my home ...
Im getting closer to my home ...
Im getting closer to my home ...
Repeated to fade
song performed by by Grand Funk Railroad
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Oh, My Captain
Oh, my Captain, my Captain
Where is that gleam in your eye?
Where is that sting
Whenever your colors fly?
Where is that thirst
for adventure you sail?
Where is that booming voice
Through oak will drive nail?
Oh, my Captain
Where could you be?
Thy gaze crosses
more than the sea
Where is the man
Who knows not any fears?
Who's cheated death
All these long years
Come Captain,
Where is thy cheer?
We sail into eternity
The rest is unclear
Oh Captain, oh Captain
Why such a sad soul?
It's treasure and loot
So much we have stole
Oh, master, my master
We are, and can no more be
Like the birds,
We are free as long as we breathe
Come Captain, my Captain
Give us command
Give 'weigh all the anchors'
Seek ye new harbors with warm golden sand
to Captain Cur
poem by Midnights Voice
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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The Captain To His Dear
Farewell to you my dear
Here, I see your smile with glare
On this deck, here I stand
About to sail far from land
Farewell to you my dear
The land is no more near
Waves are now very high
So dark now is the sky
Here is your captain lying
Above these waves arising
Below the dark skies falling
Now your captain's striving
Angrily, the tempest roar
And you captain's far from shore
But your captain keeps believing
Behind the clouds your smile is hiding
poem by Mark Joseph Canoy
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Captain Hook
Captain Hook must remember
Not to scratch his toes.
Captain Hook must watch out
And never pick his nose.
Captain Hook must be gentle
When he shakes your hand.
Captain Hook must be careful
Openin' sardine cans
And playing tag and pouring tea
And turnin' pages of his book.
Lots of folks I'm glad I ain't--
But mostly Captain Hook!
poem by Sheldon Allan Silverstein
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Star Trek Intro
Beeping of alert signal.
Ensign: captain, the transporters ready.
Captain: thats hip. lieutenant marvin, what is the condition
Of the planets surface?
Marvin: it is difficult to be precise. however, my instruments
Indicate a condition of extreme rigor mortis, spreading rapidly
Throughout the population. highly illogical, captain.
Captain: a bunch of stiffs, huh? well, set coordinates for, ah,
Chocolate city, and have a landing party of nine men beam down
Immiediately, with phasers set on funk-funk!
song performed by by Warren G
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Star Trek Intro
Beeping of alert signal.
Ensign: captain, the transporters ready.
Captain: thats hip. lieutenant marvin, what is the condition
Of the planets surface?
Marvin: it is difficult to be precise. however, my instruments
Indicate a condition of extreme rigor mortis, spreading rapidly
Throughout the population. highly illogical, captain.
Captain: a bunch of stiffs, huh? well, set coordinates for, ah,
Chocolate city, and have a landing party of nine men beam down
Immiediately, with phasers set on funk-funk!
song performed by by Warren G
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Let Her Go Down
Sometime in October
we sailed from England's shore
When we sailed into a raging storm
like I never ever seen before
And all of the crew they were brave men
but the captain he was braver
and he said
"Never mind the ship me boys
There's none of us here can save her"
Let her go down Swim for your lives
Swim for your children swim for your wives
Let her go down Let her go down
Lost in the open ocean
there was some of the crew and me
while the captain steered our wounded ship
to the bottom of an angry sea
And with his dying breath
we all heard him say
"It's just the fortune of sailor"
and he said
"Never mind the ship me boys
There's none of us here can save her"
chorus
He wondered if his shipmates
were ready to just pray and give in
so he called their names out one by one
but there was no one else around but him
He saw the ship go down the fading light
and he knew that they could have saved her
He said
"The captain lied when the captain cried
'There's none of us here can save her' "
chorus
Swim for your lives
Swim for your children swim for your wives
Let her go down Let her go down
Swim for your lives
song performed by by Hollies
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Closer To Home / I'm Your Captain
Everybody listen to me
And return me my ship
I'm your captain
I'm your captain
Though I'm feeling mighty sick
I've been lost now for days uncounted
And it's months since I've seen home
Can you hear me? Can you hear me?
Or am I all alone?
If you return me to my home port
I will kiss you Mother Earth
Take me back now
Take me back now
To the port of my birth
(bridge)
Am I in my cabin dreaming?
Or are you really scheming
To take my ship away from me?
You'd better think about it
I just can't live without it
So please don't take my ship from me
I can feel the hand of a stranger
And it's tightening around my throat
Heaven help me
Heaven help me
Take this stranger from my boat
I'm your captain
I'm your captain
Though I'm feeling mighty sick
Everybody listen to me
And return me my ship
I'm your captain
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
I'm your captain
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
I'm your captain
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
I'm your captain
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah...
I'm getting closer to my home
I'm getting closer to my home
I'm getting closer to my home (repeat until fade).
song performed by by Grand Funk Railroad
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Whenever the lion fish in the fish tank in the captain's ready room died it was always a sad moment.
quote by Patrick Stewart
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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COUCH POTATO
Parody of "Lose Yourself" by Eminem
Look
If you had
One shot
To sit on your lazy butt
And watch all the TV you ever wanted
Until your brain turned to mush
Would you go for it
Or just let it slip?
Yo
Remote is ready
Eyes wide, palms are sweaty
There's Flintstone's on the TV already
Wilma N' Betty
No virgin to channel surfin
And I'm HD ready
So I flip, garbage is all I'm getting
There's Simon Cowell
Who folks wanna disembowel
He opens his mouth, always says something foul
They're dying, Wow!
Wannabe's are crying now
He votes them out
Time to throw in the towel
Show's based on reality
Oh the humanity!
Oh! Ozzy's family!
Sho' loves profanity!
Whoa! The insanity!
Oh! Dogs that crap and pee
Home of depravity?
No! They live happily
Yo! Plus "The Ali G Show"
And "Celebrity Mole"
Oh there's Anna Nicole
She's scaring me
"Look ma, no cavities!"
Oh! It's a station break
Better go out to the kitchen and microwave something
"You're gonna lose your mind watchin TV"
They told me, they'd scold me
But I still tune in every show (show)
My cable gets C-SPAN, TV Land and HBO
The Travel Channel, Discovery, and Lifetime (yo)
"You're gonna lose your mind watchin' TV"
They told me, cajoled me
"Turn off those music videos!" (no!)
I'm gonna watch C-SPAN TV Land and HBO
The History Channel and QVC and Lifetime (yo)
"You're Gonna..."
My butt is aching
As I watch NASCAR racing
That show about undertaking
Larry King to "24" to "Law and Order"
The Weather Channel's boring like 60 Minutes
Ancient reporters next up on "E True Hollywood Story"
The rise and decline of twelve actors named Corey
Shows for next fall, they've already been naming
"CSI: Boise", and "Touched By An Uncle", both sound prettying lame, man
so does "Everybody Tolerates Raymond"
and "King of Queens" jumped the shark the first minute
I can't believe Richard Simmons ain't in it.
I'll move right on to "8 Simple Rules for Dating My Teenaged Daughter"
Then I bet I'll watch "The Bachelorette"
Followed by "Welcome Back, Kotter"
And "The Muppet Show" where they go "Mahna Mahna"
"You're gonna lose your mind watching TV"
They told me, they'd scold me
But I still tune in every show (show)
My cable gets C-SPAN, TV Land and HBO
The Disney Channel, and A&E and Lifetime
"You're gonna lose your mind watching TV"
They told me, cajoled me
But I still love Lisa Kudrow (drow)
I'm lookin' at C-SPAN, TV Land and HBO
The Playboy Channel and Court TV and Lifetime (yo)
Never missed "Melrose Place" or "Lost in Space"
I've seen each "Amazing Race" and "Without a Trace"
But I only watched "Will and Grace" one time one day
Wished I hadn't cause TiVo now thinks I'm gay
Oh, and "Fear Factor" I watched maybe a half hour
After that felt like I needed a long shower
Network execs with naked ambition
"Next week on FOX - watch lions eat Christians!"
Like to tie up those programming planners
Make'em watch all of that junk 'til their heads explode just like "Scanners"
Leech-covered grub-eating fools on "Survivor"
Look, there's James Lipton discussing the oeuvre of Mr. Rob Schneider
And there's Gilligan and SpongeBob, plus there's MacGyver
And Jay Leno has got Madonna and hey, there's Luke Perry
And a special all pig-latin episode of "Drew Carey"
Wanna turn on ET cause I'm a gossip freak
And I gotta know who J. Lo is marryin' this week
A 30 second spot, then we come back to "Are You Hot?"
I was planning on recording "The Sopranos". I forgot!
I love shows with or without a plot
I stare 'til my legs are numb, my eyes bloodshot
Because I only have got
one brain to rot
I'm gonna spend my life watching television a lot
"You're gonna lose your mind watching TV"
They told me, they'd scold me
But I still tune into every show (show)
My cable's gets C-SPAN, TV-Land, and HBO
The Sci-Fi Channel and AMC and Lifetime (yo!)
"You're gonna lose your mind watching TV"
They told me, cajoled me,
"Turn off that Oprah Winfrey show!" (no!)
I got it on C-SPAN, TV Land and HBO
The Learning Channel and MTV and Lifetime (yo!)
You can watch anything you want to, man.
song performed by by Weird Al Yankovic
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Closer To Home
I'm Your Captain
Grand Funk Railroad
Mark Farner
The tune that is remembered as "Closer To Home", is actually labeled "I'm
Your Captain" on both the album sleeve and record label. It is from the
album "Closer To Home", released by Grand Funk Railroad in June of 1970.
Everybody,
listen to me,
and return me, my ship.
I'm your captain, I'm your captain,
though I'm feeling mighty sick.
I've been lost now,
days uncounted,
and it's months since,
I've seen home.
Can you hear me, can you hear me,
or am I all alone?
If you return me,
to my home port,
I will kiss you,
mother earth.
Take me back now, take me back now,
to the port, of my birth.
Am I in my cabin dreaming,
or are you really scheming,
to take my ship away from me.
You'd better think about it,
I jsut can't live without it,
so please don't take my ship from me.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I can feel the hand,
of a stranger,
and it tightening,
around my throat.
Heaven help me, heaven help me,
take this stranger, from my boat.
I'm your captain, I'm your captain,
though I'm feeling mighty sick.
Everybody, listen to me,
and return me, my ship,
I'm your captain, yeah yeah yeah yeah
I'm your captain, yeah yeah yeah yeah
I'm your captain, yeah yeah yeah yeah
I'm your captain, yeah yeah yeah yeah
I'm getting closer to my home.
I'm getting closer to my home.
transcribed by Steve McClurg ([email protected])
song performed by by Grand Funk Railroad
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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The Captain
Well I don't have as many friends because
I'm not as pretty as I was
I've kicked myself at times because I've lied
So I will have to learn to stand my ground
I'll tell 'em I won't be around
I'll move on over to your town and hide
And you be the Captain
And I'll be no-one
And you can carry me away if you want to
And you can lay low
Just like your father and if
I tread upon your feet you just say so
'Cos you're The Captain
song performed by by Kasey Chambers from The Captain
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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