En.Citatepedia^®.ro

Jack o' the Cudgel

Part I

'Twas in the famous town of Windsor, on a fine summer morn,
Where the sign of Windsor Castle did a tavern adorn;
And there sat several soldiers drinking together,
Resolved to make merry in spite of wind or weather.

And old Simon the landlord was at the head of the table,
Cutting slices of beef as quick as he was able;
And one of the soldiers was of rather superior rank,
And on his dress trinkets of gold and silver together did clank.

He was a free companion, but surly and hard,
And a soldier of fortune, and was named Croquard;
And he had all the appearance of his martial calling,
But on this particular morning he was rudely bawling.

So the other soldiers laughed, for their spirits felt gay,
And they applauded his jokes, and let him have his own way,
Because he could command as desperate a gang of men as any in the world,
So many a joke and slur at the soldiers he hurled.

And the mirth increased as the day wore on,
And Croquard didn't seem the least woe-begone;
But, as he was trolling out a very merry song,
A wandering minstrel sat down beside him, and thought it no wrong.

By my troth, shouted Croquard, Come here, minstrel,
And give us a stave of love or war, which is my will:
But the minstrel didn'-t appear to comply with this request,
And he tried to withdraw, as he thought it was best.

Ho ! didst thou hear me, varlet? then Croquard did cry:
Oh! gentle sir, replied the minstrel, I cannot with your wish comply;
Believe me, I sing best to the ladies at the court,
And, in doing so, find it more profitable sport.

What, varlet! cried Croquard, Dost thou refuse me?
By heaven, proud cur, you shall see
And feel the weight of my hand before you are much older:
Then he instantly sprang up, and seized the minstrel by the shoulder.

Then the youth began to tremble, and seemed terrified to death,
And appeared ready to faint for the want of breath;
While Croquard shook him roughly, just like an ugly whelp,
And he looked from one to another, imploring help

At this moment a youth observed what was going on,
And he cried out to Croquard, Inhuman monster, begone!
Leave the minstrel, thou pig-headed giant, or I'll make you repent,
For thou must know my name is Jack, and I hail from Kent.

Then Croquard relaxed his hold of the minstrel boy,
Which caused the minstrel's heart to leap with joy;
As Jack placed himself before Croquard the giant,
And stood on his guard with a stout oak cudgel defiant.

Then the fist of the giant descended in a crack,
But Jack dealt Croquard a heavy blow upon the back
With his cudgel, so that the giant's hand fell powerless down by his side,
And he cursed and roared with pain, and did Jack deride.

Then the giant tried to draw his sword for to fight,
But Jack danced around him like a young sprite,
And struck him a blow with his cudgel upon the back of the head,
And from the effects of the blow he was nearly killed dead.

Then down sank the carcase of the giant to the ground,
While the soldiers about Jack did quickly gather round;
And Jack cried, Ha! lie thou there overgrown brute,
And defiantly he spurned Croquard's body with his foot.

There, lad, cried Vintner Simon, thou hast shown English spirit to-day,
By chastising yon overbearing giant in a very proper way;
So come, my lad, and drink a flagon of my very best sack,
For you handled your cudgel well, and no courage did lack.

Then no sooner had our hero finished his goblet of sack,
He cried, Go and fetch the minstrel back;
For the giant by this time had fled far away,
Therefore the minstrel's tender heart need not throb with dismay.

Then the minstrel was brought back without delay,
Which made Jack's heart feel light and gay,
And the minstrel thanked Jack for saving him on that eventful day,
So the soldiers drank to Jack's health, and then went away.

And when King Edward III. heard what Jack had done,
He sent for Jack o' the Cudgel, the noble Saxon,
And he made him his page, and Jack uttered not a word,
But he unwillingly gave up the cudgel for the honour of the sword.

Part II

After the battle of Calais, King Edward returns to fair England,
And he invited his nobles to a banquet most grand,
That the like hadn't been in England for many a day;
And many of the guests invited had come from far away.

The large hall of Windsor Castle was ablaze with light,
And there sat King Edward and his Queen, a most beautiful sight-
To see them seated upon two thrones of burnished gold;
And near the King sat Jack o' the Cudgel, like a warrior bold.

And when the banquet was prepared, King Edward arose,
And said, My honoured guests, I have called you together for a special purpose!
To celebrate our victories so gloriously achieved in France
By my noble and heroic troops at the charge of the lance.

And now, since the war in France with us is o'er,
And Edward, our son, about to marry the lady he does adore,
The most amiable and lovely Countess of Kent;
Therefore, I hope they will happy live together and never repent.

Then King Edward took the Countess by the hand, and said,
Come, Edward, take your bride by the hand, and don't be afraid;
And do not think, my beloved son, that with you I feel wroth,
Therefore, take the Countess by the hand, and plight your troth.

Then the Prince arose and took the fair Countess by the hand,
As King Edward, his father, had given the royal command;
Then he led the Countess Joan to the foot of the throne,
Then King Edward and his Queen welcomed the Countess to their palatial home.

Then the Prince unto his father said, I must not forget whatever betide,
That to Sir Jack o' the Cudgel I do owe my bride;
Because he rescued her from the hands of a fierce brigand,
Therefore 'twould be hard to find a braver knight in fair England.

Then a cheer arose, which made the lofty hall to ring,
As Jack advanced towards the throne, on the motion of the King;
Then Jack fell on one knee before King Edward,
Then said the Monarch, Arise, brave youth, and I will thee reward.

Sir Jack, I give thee land to the value of six hundred marks
In thine own native county of Kent, with beautiful parks,
Also beautiful meadows and lovely flowers and trees,
Where you can reside and enjoy yourself as you please.

And remember, when I need your service you will be at my command,
Then Jack o' the Cudgel bowed assent, and kissed King Edward's hand;
Then the Countess Joan took a string of rarest pearls from her hair,
And placed the pearls around Jack's neck, most costly and rare.

Then the tumult became uproarious when Jack received the presentation,
And he thanked the Lady Joan for the handsome donation;
Then all the ladies did loudly cheer, and on Jack smilingly did fan,
And Sir Walter Manny cried aloud, Sir Jack, you are a lucky man.

Then the mirth increased, and louder the applause,
And the Countess Joan asked, after a pause,
Tell me who has gained the love of the Knight o' the Cudgel;
Then Jack replied, My lady, you know her right well.

She is the lovely daughter of noble John of Aire,
Then, replied the Countess, she is a lovely creature, I must declare;
And I hope the choice that you have made won't make you grieve,
Then Jack kissed the Countess's hand, and took his leave.

And he wended his way to his beautiful estate in Kent,
And many a happy day there he spent;
And he married the lovely daughter of John of Aire,
And they lived happy together, and free from all care.

poem by William Topaz McGonagall
Submitted by Poetry Lover
Vote! | Copy!

She's Got The Jack

She gave me the Queen
She gave me the King
She was wheelin' and dealin'
Just doin' her thing
She was holdin' a pair
But I had to try
Her Deuce was wild
But my Ace was high
But how was I to know
That she'd been dealt with before
Said she'd never had a Full House
But I should have known
From the tattoo on her left leg
And the garter on her right
She'd have the card to bring me down
If she played it right
She's got the jack, she's got the jack
She's got the jack, she's got the jack
She's got the jack, she's got the jack
She's got the jack, she's got the jack
She's got the jack, jack, jack, jack, jack, jack, jack
She's got the jack
Poker face was her name
Poker face was her nature
Poker straight was her game
If she knew she could get you
She played 'em fast
And she played 'em hard
She could close her eyes
And feel every card
But how was I to know
That she'd been shuffled before
Said she'd never had a Royal Flush
But I should have known
That all the cards were comin'
From the bottom of the pack
And if I'd known what she was dealin' out
I'd have dealt it back
She's got the jack, she's got the jack
She's got the jack, and who knows what else?
She's got the jack, yeah, yeah
She's got the jack, she's got the jack
She's got the jack, she's got the jack
She's got the jack, jack, jack, jack, jack, jack, jack
She's got the jack
She's got the jack, she's got the jack,
Ooh, It was a bad deal, (Jack)
She gave me the (Jack), hey
She's got the (Jack), she's got the (Jack)
She's got the (Jack), ooh can't you tell
She's got the (Jack, jack, jack, jack, jack, jack, jack, jack)
(She's got the jack, she's got the Jack)
She's got the jack, she's got the Jack
She's got the jack, you never know!
She's got the jack, she's got the jack
She's got the jack
She's got the jack, and it hurts!
(She's got the jack)
She's got the jack, jack, jack, jack, jack, jack, jack
She's got the jack
Aaaaaah!
Oooooh!
Thank you, thank you, thank you people, thank you, thank you
I'm glad you like the show, yes, thank you very much folks.
Goodnight and God bless

song performed by by AC-DC
Submitted by Lucian Velea
Vote! | Copy!

The Battle of Cressy

'Twas on the 26th of August, the sun was burning hot,
In the year of 1346, which will never be forgot,
Because the famous field of Cressy was slippery and gory,
By the loss of innocent blood which I'11 relate in story.

To the field of Cressy boldly King Philip did advance,
Aided by the Bohemian Army and chosen men of France,
And treble the strength of the English Army that day,
But the lance thrusts of the English soon made them give way.

The English Army was under the command of the Prince of Wales,
And with ringing cheers the soldiers his presence gladly hails,
As King Edward spoke to the Prince, his son, and said,
My son put thou thy trust in God and be not afraid,
And he will protect thee in the midst of the fight,
And remember God always defends the right.

Then the Prince knelt on one knee before the King,
Whilst the soldiers gathered round them in a ring;
Then the King commanded that the Prince should be carefully guarded,
And if they were victorious each man would be rewarded.

These arrangements being made, the Prince rode away,
And as he rode past the ranks, his spirits felt gay;
Then he ordered the men to refresh themselves without delay,
And prepare to meet the enemy in the coming deadly fray.

Then contentedly the men seated themselves upon the grass,
And ate and drank to their hearts content, until an hour did pass;
Meanwhile the French troops did advance in disorganised masses,
But as soon as the English saw them they threw aside their glasses.

And they rose and stood in the ranks as solid as the rock,
All ready and eager to receive the enemy's shock;
And as the morning was advancing a little beyond noon,
They all felt anxious for the fight, likewise to know their doom.

Then the French considered they were unable to begin the attack,
And seemed rather inclined for to draw back;
But Court D'Alencon ordered them on to the attack,
Then the rain poured down in torrents and the thunder did crack.

Then forward marched the French with mock shrill cries,
But the English their cries most bravely defies;
And as the sun shone out in all its brilliant array,
The English let fly their arrows at them without the least dismay.

And each man fought hard with sword and lance pell mell,
And the ranks were instantly filled up as soon as a man fell;
And the Count D'Alencon, boldly charged the Black Prince.
And he cried, yield you, Sir Knight, or I'll make you wince,

Ha, by St. George! thou knowest not what thou sayest,
Therefore yield thyself, Sir Frenchman, for like an ass thou brayest;
Then planting his lance he ran at the Count without fear,
And the Count fell beneath the Black Prince's spear.

And the Black Prince and his men fought right manfully,
By this time against some forty thousand of the enemy,
Until the Prince recognised the banner of Bohemia floating in the air;
Then he cried that banner shall be mine, by St. George I do swear.

On! on! for old England, he cried, on! gentlemen on!
And spur your chargers quickly, and after them begone;
Then the foremost, a slight youth, to the Prince did reply,
My Prince, I'll capture that banner for you else I will die.

Ha! cried the Prince, is it thou my gallant Jack of Kent,
Now charge with me my brave lad for thou has been sent
By God, to aid me in the midst of the fight,
So forward, and wield your cudgel with all your might.

Then right into the midst of the Bohemian Knights they fought their way,
Brave Jack o' the Cudgel and the Prince without dismay;
And Jack rushed at the Standard Bearer without any dread,
And struck him a blow with his cudgel which killed him dead.

Then Jack bore off the Standard, to the Prince's delight,
Then the French and the Bohemians instantly took to flight;
And as the last rays of the sun had faded in the west,
The wounded and dying on both sides longed for rest.

And Philip, King of France, was wounded twice in the fray,
And was forced to fly from the field in great dismay;
And John of Hainault cried, come sire, come away,
I hope you will live to win some other day.

Then King Edward and his army, and the Prince his son,
Knelt down and thanked God for the victory won;
And the King's heart was filled with great delight,
And he thanked Jack for capturing the Bohemian Standard during the fight.

poem by William Topaz McGonagall
Submitted by Poetry Lover
Vote! | Copy!

Jack U Off

If ure looking for somewhere to go
Thought Id take u to a movie show
Sittin in the back and Ill jack u off
I cant give u everything u want
But I can take u to a restaurant
If ure not hungry
Ill jack u off
If your man aint no good
Come on over to my neighborhood
We can jump in the sack and Ill jack u off
If ure tired of the masturbater
Little girl, we can go on a date
And if u like, Ill jack u off
Ill jack u off, jack u off
Ill jack u off, jack u off
Ill jack u off
I only do it for a worthy cause
Viriginity or menopause
Ull have an instant heart attack if I jack u off
If u really really want to be a star
We gotta do it in your mommas car
Naked in a cadillac, Ill jack u off
If we cant find no place to go
Girl, Ill take u to a movie show, we can sit in the back
And Ill jack u off
Ill jack u off, jack u off
Ill jack u off, jack u off
Ill jack u off, yeah
Yeah, yeah, Ill jack u off
Alright say, well put some funk on here
Ill jack u off
If u aint chicken baby, come here
If ure good Ill even let u steer
As a matter of fact, u can jack me off
Yeah, thats right
Ill jack u off, yeah
Ill jack u off

song performed by by Prince
Submitted by Lucian Velea
Vote! | Copy!

To Jack

SO, I’ve battled it through on my own, Jack,
I have done with all dreaming and doubt.
Though “stoney” to-night and alone, Jack,
I am watching the Old Year out.
I have finished with brooding and fears,
Jack, And the spirit is rising in me,
For the sake of the old New Years, Jack,
And the bright New Years to be.

I have fallen in worldly disgrace, Jack,
And I know very well that you heard;
They have blackened my name in this place, Jack,
And I answered them never a word.
But why should I bluster or grieve,
Jack? So narrow and paltry they be—
I knew you would never believe, Jack,
The lies that were said against me.

That is done which shall never be undone,
And I blame not, I blame not my land,
But I’m hearing the Calling of London,
And I long for the roar of the Strand.
It was always the same with our race,
Jack; You know how a vagabond feels—
We can fight a straight man face to face, Jack.
But we can’t keep the curs from our heels.

You know I loved women and drink, Jack,
And that’s how the trouble began;
But you know that I never would shrink,
Jack, From a deed that was worthy a man!
I never was paltry or mean, Jack.
And cruel I never could be,
I will give you a hand which is clean,
Jack, When we meet again over the sea.

I will bring a few wrinkles of care,
Jack; I have altered a lot, I am told;
The steel-filings show in my hair, Jack;
But my heart is as young as of old.
I have faith still in women, and men, Jack,
Though selfish and blind they may be.
I still have my soul and my pen, Jack,
And my country seems dearer to me.

I will sail when your summer sets in, Jack,
And good-bye to my own native land;
Oh, I long for a glimpse of your grin, Jack,
And I long for the grip of your hand.
We both suffered sorrow and pain, Jack,
And sinned in the days that are done;
But we’ll fight the old battle again, Jack,
Where the battle is worth being won.

poem by Henry Lawson
Submitted by Poetry Lover
Vote! | Copy!

Jack Cornstalk

Jack Cornstalk as a drover born,
Jack Cornstalk gaunt and tan,
Jack Cornstalk leaves his love forlorn,
Jack Cornstalk man to man.
Jack Cornstalk as a careless scamp,
With day-dreams in his head;
Jack Cornstalk on his lone, wide camp,
Jack Cornstalk with his dead,
Jack Cornstalk at his best and worst.
The day dawns on his brow,
Jack Cornstalk’s country must be first –
Advance Australia now!

poem by Henry Lawson
Submitted by Poetry Lover
Vote! | Copy!

The Big Jack

I know you and you know me
We met many years ago
In the halls ofe some ivy covered university
Where we both used to go
Now we stand outside the denmark hotel
With japanese men in ther business suits
Its midnight youre talking to some frenchman
About who does what to you know who
You want the big jack
You want the sky to crack
You want something thats goin? to give you
The big jack
You want the big jack
Hell we all want that
You want something thats goin? to give you
The big jack
You say you want to go somewhere
Where your ideals were much more than luxuries
And just like some great old painting
You set there so smug
Whith your hands between your knees
You want the big jack
You want the sky to crack
You want something thats goin? to give you
The big jack
You want the big jack
Hell we all want that
You want something thats goin? to give you a
Heart attack
So go back down to that missisippi town
Where you come from
Have a big time tonight
I can still see you in your fathers coat
On the delta shore
That he once owned
I want to be your fathers coat
I want you girl to matty me
I want the big jack
I want the sky to crack
I want something thats goin? to give me
The big jack
I want the big jack
Hell we all want that
I want something thats goin? to give me a
Heart attack
I want the big jack
Yeah we all want that
We want something thats going to give us the big jack
I want the big jack
I want the sky to crack
I want something thats going to give me the big jack

song performed by by John Mellencamp
Submitted by Lucian Velea
Vote! | Copy!

Better Watch Your Back

Oh, living the life of a madmans wife, has got to be unreal
cause shes got to hold on to ground control
While jack does what he feels
Well he stays away, and then he comes home
And he never knows where hes been
Jack blasts downtown then hes over the line,
And then hes a kid again
Jack said its hard living in a dream, and its hard
Always giving in to me
*his wife saw jack in a crowd of boys and he was talking against
The man
She saw the guys getting dangerous eyes, and she knew it
Was never or then
So she ran on back an d said to jack jack, jack I wouldnt do that,
If youre gonna continue to give your opinion, youd better
Watch your back
Oh, jack said youd better watch your back
Said youd better watch your back
Said youd better watch your back
*said youd better watch your back, oh, jack
Had knock down dream, then he saw the man.
And thought hed save the day
Jack gave roar, made for the door, hed go to church and pray
Say jackie, religion and you, aint mixed well in the past
Remember when you smashed your fist on the eucharist,
Threw up in high mass?
Its hard always giving in to me
* repeat*
Oh, jack youd better watch your back, oh, jack, oh jack,
Oh, jack........

song performed by by Hall & Oates
Submitted by Lucian Velea
Vote! | Copy!

Jack

YOU'RE only a dumb little dog, Jack,
About ten or twelve pounds or so,
And your wits must be all in a fog, Jack,
If you have any wits, I know.
But you've two such soft brown eyes, Jack,
5
And such long grey silky hair;
And, what very much more I prize, Jack,
Such a warm little heart in there.
They say warm hearts are rare, Jack,
And I almost believe that it's true;
10
But there ar'n't many hearts can compare, Jack,
With that staunch little heart in you.
Of course, we that speak and can read, Jack,
Have plenty of friendships sweet;
But, in spite of them all, there's a need, Jack,
15
For a friend like the friend at my feet.
This planet must seem a queer place, Jack,
To your poor little limited mind;
For I fancy you never can trace, Jack,
The reasons for half that you find.
20

You're not bothered with questions like us, Jack,
About forces and morals and laws;
And you never get worried or fuss, Jack,
When you cannot discover a cause.
But you go your own little way, Jack,
25
With a wag of the tail for a friend;
And in spite of our talk, I dare say, Jack,
That we don't do much more in the end.

poem by Frederick George Scott
Submitted by Poetry Lover
Vote! | Copy!

Well Its True That We Love One Another

Well its true that we love one another
I love jack white like a little brother
Well holly I love you too but theres
Just so much that I dont know about you
Jack give me some money to pay my bills
All the dough I give you holly
You been using on pain pills
Jack will you call me if youre able?
I got your phone number written
In the back of my bible
Jack I think your pulling my leg
And I think maybe I better ask meg
Meg do you think jack really loves me?
You know, I dont care because
Jack really bugs me
Why dont you ask him now?
Well I would meg
I really just dont know how
Just say jack , do you adore me?
Well I would holly but love really bores me
Well maybe we should just be friends
Im just kidding holly
You know that Ill love you til the end
Well its true that we love one another
I love jack white like a little brother
Well holly I love you too but theres
Just so much that I dont know about you
Holly give me some of your english lovin
If I did that jack Id have one in the oven
Why dont you go off and just love yourself
If I did that holly there wont be anything
Left for anybody else
Jack its too bad about the way you look
You know I gave that horse a carrot
So hed break your foot
Will the two of you cut it out
And tell em what its really all about
Well its true that we love one another
I love jack white like a little brother
Well holly I love you too but theres
Just so much that I dont know about you

song performed by by White Stripes
Submitted by Lucian Velea
Vote! | Copy!

It's True That We Love One Another

Well its true that we love one another
I love Jack White like a little brother
Well Holly I love you too but theres just so much
That I dont know about you
Jack give me some money to pay my bills
All the dough I give you Holly
You been using on pain pills
Jack will you call me if youre able?
I got your phone number written
In the back of my bible
Jack I think youre pulling my leg
And I think maybe Id better ask Meg
Meg do you think Jack really loves me?
You know, I dont care because Jack really bugs me
Why dont you ask him now?
Well I would but Meg, I really just dont know how
Just say Jack, do you adore me?
Well I would Holly but love really bores me
Well maybe we should just be friends
Im just kidding Holly
You know that Ill love you til the end
Well its true that we love one another
I love Jack White like a little brother
Well Holly I love you too but theres just so much
That I dont know about you
Holly give me some of your
English lovin
If I did that Jack Id have one in
the oven
Why dont you go off and love yourself
If I did that Holly there
wont be anything left
For anybody else
Jack its too bad
About the way that you look
You know I gave that horse a carrot
So hed break your foot
Will the two of you cut it out
And tell em what Its really all about
Well its true that we love one another
I love Jack White like a little brother
Well Holly I love you too
But theres just so much
That I dont know about you

song performed by by White Stripes
Submitted by Lucian Velea
Vote! | Copy!

From A Jack To A King

(words & music by miller)
From a jack to a king of loneliness to a wedding ring
Ive played a ace and I won the queen
I walked away with your heart
From a jack to a king
With no regrets I stacked, I stacked the cards, I stacked the cards last night
And lady luck played her hand just right
You made me king of your heart
Oh for just a little while I thought that I might lose the game
Oh but just in time I saw that twinkle in your eyes
From a jack to a king of loneliness to a wedding, wedding, wedding ring
I played an ace and I won the queen
You made me king of your heart
For just a little while I thought that I might lose the game
Oh but just in time I saw, I saw that twinkle in your eyes
From a jack to a king from loneliness to a wedding, wedding, wedding ring
I played an ace and I won the queen
You made me king of your heart

song performed by by Elvis Presley
Submitted by Lucian Velea
Vote! | Copy!

And I Am An Idiot, Right?

Seven years after they fell from the hill,
In a live-in relation were Jack and Jill.
They had found themselves a graduate course,
Jill was this learning's driving force.

So one fine day, back from the institute,
She said 'listen jack, i don't wanna talk to you'.
Of such an experience was jack destitute,
and so he asked 'can you tell me, what i did do? '

'No' she said, 'go find out if you want'.
'If you don't tell me baby, I sincerely can't'.
I don't care about that, she said, twitching her lips,
Clueless and insane he, already missing her hips.

'Don't touch me jack, you don't like me anymore',
Whats come to this woman he thought.
In the next two days, things got so sour,
that they did not even share the damned cot.

A week went by and he gets a call,
'How are you jack, my baby doll'.
Exclamation marks popped up his mind,
Why is this bitch acting so kind?

She wanted him to help with her Labor law work,
and he felt like the labor himself, just another clerk.
She thanked him as if nothing had happened,
What bloody character sketch, for women had god penned?

and then it was, 'come on jack lets make the bed'.
hey what happened to the big fight?
Definitely love, am coming in a minute, he said,
and thought 'and I am an idiot right? '

poem by Krish King Nishanth
Submitted by Poetry Lover
Vote! | Copy!

From A Jack To A King (Takes 1,2,3)

From a jack to a king of loneliness to a wedding ring
I've played a ace and I won the queen
I walked away with your heart
From a jack to a king
With no regrets I stacked, I stacked the cards, I stacked the cards last night
And lady luck played her hand just right
You made me king of your heart
Oh for just a little while I thought that I might lose the game
Oh but just in time I saw that twinkle in your eyes
From a jack to a king of loneliness to a wedding, wedding, wedding ring
I played an ace and I won the queen
You made me king of your heart
For just a little while I thought that I might lose the game
Oh but just in time I saw, I saw that twinkle in your eyes
From a jack to a king from loneliness to a wedding, wedding, wedding ring
I played an ace and I won the queen
You made me king of your heart

song performed by by Elvis Presley
Submitted by Lucian Velea
Vote! | Copy!

Jumpin Jack Flash

I was born in a cross-fire hurricane
And I howled at my ma in the driving rain,
But it's all right now, in fact, it's a gas!
But it's all right. I'm Jumpin' Jack Flash,
It's a Gas! Gas! Gas!
I was raised by a toothless, bearded hag,
I was schooled with a strap right across my back,
But it's all right now, in fact, it's a gas!
But it's all right, I'm Jumpin' Jack Flash,
It's a Gas! Gas! Gas!
I was drowned, I was washed up and left for dead.
I fell down to my feet and I saw they bled.
I frowned at the crumbs of a crust of bread.
Yeah, yeah, yeah
I was crowned with a spike right thru my head.
But it's all right now, in fact, it's a gas!
But it's all right, I'm Jumpin' Jack Flash,
It's a Gas! Gas! Gas!
Jumping Jack Flash, its a gas
Jumping Jack Flash, its a gas
Jumping Jack Flash, its a gas
Jumping Jack Flash, its a gas
Jumping Jack Flash

song performed by by Guns N' Roses
Submitted by Lucian Velea
Vote! | Copy!

Jack The Idiot Dunce

Whos the fool with the cross-eyed stare,
The turned up nose and moronic glare?
Whos that simpleton standing over there?
Jack, jack the idiot dunce.
Whos that dumb-looking freckle-faced runt?
Jack, jack the idiot dunce.
He walks like his feet are on back to front,
Jack, jack the idiot dunce.
When he waddles down the street he looks kind of queer,
Jack, jack the idiot dunce,
Because hes got two left feet and taxi-door ears,
Jack, jack the idiot dunce.
And when we laugh at the clothes he wears,
Jack just smiles cos he dont care.
Whos that fool? whos that ninny?
Whos that twit? whos that chump?
The idiot dunce, the idiot dunce.
Who is always the bottom of the class?
Jack, jack the idiot dunce.
Whos a fool? whos a boob?
Whos a kook and an ass?
Jack, jack the idiot dunce.
When we take examinations he never gets a pass,
Jack, jack the idiot dunce.
And we all put him down cos he cant think fast,
Jack, jack the idiot dunce.
We ridicule him and punch him around,
But jack just laughs and stands his ground,
The idiot dunce, the idiot dunce.
Yeah, hes so unco-ordinated.
Yeah, and so disorientated,
And when we have a high school hop
You ought to see that idiot bop
And his arms and his legs
Seem to have minds of their own,
And you dont need brains
To have educated muscles and bones.
Yeah, you ought to see him dance
He moves like hes in a trance,
And when we have a high school hop
You ought to see that idiot rock,
And hes finally proved
That you dont need a high i.q.
To make your body move.
Now hes created a dance that everybodys trying to do.
Jack, jack the idiot dunce.
Do the idiot dunce.
All right put your finger on your nose,
Now cross those eyes.
Put your hands on your hips,
Now wriggle your backside.
Now youve got the knack
To do the idiot jack
From your head to the tips of your toes.
Now the whole worlds doing it and everybody knows,
Jack, jack the idiot dunce.
Hes a real cool cat and a real gone groove,
Jack, jack the idiot dunce.
And the girls go crazy when he starts to move,
Jack, jack the idiot dunce
Now jacks a success hes got nothing to prove,
Jack, jack the idiot dunce.
Even though jack is dim
His mother is so proud of him.
Hey, whos that groovy looking dude
Dancing with all the chicks?
The idiot dunce, the idiot dunce.

song performed by by Kinks
Submitted by Lucian Velea
Vote! | Copy!

Jack And Jill

this is not the usual story of Jack and Jill,
this is reality
welcome. Jack married Jill
in 1985
the first year was bliss
until the second year
when Jack
was so pressured
in his work
and Jill who was left at
home
got so bored with nothing
to do
except to listen
to Jack's shifting
towards the corners
of insanity
and then one day
Jill cooked Chinese noddles
for their wedding anniversary
which of course
she did not recall
but Jack still had it vivid
in his mind
the expensive wedding gown
the diamond ring
and flashy car
and the well attended
grand reception

Jack went wild
and throw the hot noddles
in Jill's face

Jill went to the U.S.
married a white man
Jack finally landed
in a mental asylum

The house where they once
lived
got burned

nothing remained
except the vacant lot
foreclosed by
the bank

sad
Jack and Jill
did not live happily everafter

poem by Ric S. Bastasa
Submitted by Poetry Lover
Vote! | Copy!

The Dirty Boy (and what befell him) II

'Spitting is dirty and crass', said Mim,
and isn't very nice
and by the statutes of this state
it constitutes a vise.

'So grow up, Jack', said little Mim
'So Jack', said John, 'get big'
But all that Jack would mutter back
was 'better pig than prig'.

'So here's to you, mate', shot back Jack
and here's to you-take that! '
and to the horror of them both
forthwith hauled off and spat!

Such the scope and depth and pitch
and tempo of infraction
that they hired a lawyer, (greedy witch)
and filed a class action.

The justice heard the case with awe
the jury with dismay-
in chorus near unanimous
they put the boy away.

Jack did no time, he paid a fine
(his too a canny lawyer-
but waiting, found, when he got home
a hiding from his father.

'Fair is fair', said little Mim,
'And fine is fine', said John
'and if you spit we should be pleased
to do the same again.'

poem by Morgan Michaels
Submitted by Poetry Lover
Vote! | Copy!

Jack The Sailor

Jack I met dancing,
he was a great lead,
He also taught me how to Salsa
he wanted to make me succeed.
he had a Jack Russell who was really sweet.
Now Jack was a sailor on the lakes,
the lakes in MN make no mistake.
Now I hadn’t seen Jack for sometime,
He called out “Melodie” and I knew
he was an old friend of mine.
He had a dance party at his apartment in Minneapolis,
friends where dressed up looking fabulous.
Now Jack wants to sail around the world,
I hope he does and meets his dream girl.

Written by Suzae Chevalier on October 5,2011
www.puppetpoems.com

poem by Christina Sunrise
Submitted by Poetry Lover
Vote! | Copy!

Jack Of All Parades

When we first met I didnt know what to do
My old love lines were all worn out on you
And the world walked round at my mouth
They lit me up and they snuffed me out
[chorus]
And I was everybodys boy
But soon that thrill just fades
To be the love of one true heart
Or the jack of all parades
You wont know who to thank
You wont know who to blame
Its just a part of the murdering game
cos down in the fleshpots
Where they pay you in pounds
Theyre laughing like drains
And baying like bloodhounds
For the jack of all parades
The jack of all parades
Once I knew a girl
That looked so much like judy garland
That people would stop and give her money
And everybody was frankie, jimmy or bobby
Not the jack, the jack of all parades,
Oh the jack, the jack of all parades,
Oh the jack, of all parades.
Now the way that I feel is no longer news
You know my love and how to refuse it
Cause you know where the door is
And how to use it
Oh you know you do
But from my chequered past
To this shattered terrace
Where you cant keep your mind off
The crimes of paris
And you cant keep your peace
And try to forget it
And I cant forgive you
For things you havent done yet
Oh I was anybodys boy
But soon that thrill just fades
To be the love of one true heart
Or the jack of all parades
When we first met I didnt know what to do
My old love lines were all worn out on you
And the world walked round my mouth
I didnt mean to say it
I just blurted it out
As you pretended not to notice
Or be taken aback
And I loved you there and then
Its as simple as that
Oh I was everybodys boy
But soon that thrill just fades
To be the love of one true heart
Or the jack of all parades
To be the love of one true heart
Or the jack of all parades
Oh the jack of all parades

song performed by by Elvis Costello
Submitted by Lucian Velea
Vote! | Copy!

Son Of A New York Gun

Jack my friend, hes a busy man
Trying to hustle an easy buck instead of a good mans dollar
Oh jack my buddy hes so goddamn full of money
Workin for a funny company for his father
He got a black satin shirt best you could buy
And a big fat straw hat to match his white tie
And a shiny thirty-eight thatll look you straight in your eye
Jack miraculous he was a sure spectaculous
The son of a new york gun
Look out jack ...
He got a black satin shirt best you could buy
And a big fat straw hat to match his white tie
And a big twenty-two thatll make you do what he want
Jack miraculous he was a sure spectaculous
The son of a new york gun
Look out jack ... jack miraculous
The son of a new york gun
Look out jack

song performed by by Gino Vanelli
Submitted by Lucian Velea
Vote! | Copy!