The Modern Major-General
I am the very pattern of a modern Major-Gineral,
I've information vegetable, animal, and mineral;
I know the kings of England, and I quote the fights historical,
From Marathon to Waterloo, in order categorical;
I'm very well acquainted, too, with matters mathematical,
I understand equations, both the simple and quadratical;
About binomial theorem I'm teeming with a lot o' news,
With interesting facts about the square of the hypotenuse,
I'm very good at integral and differential calculus,
I know the scientific names of beings animalculous.
In short, in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral,
I am the very model of a modern Major-Gineral.
I know our mythic history - KING ARTHUR'S and SIR CARADOC'S,
I answer hard acrostics, I've a pretty taste for paradox;
I quote in elegiacs all the crimes of HELIOGABALUS,
In conics I can floor peculiarities parabolous.
I tell undoubted RAPHAELS from GERARD DOWS and ZOFFANIES,
I know the croaking chorus from the "Frogs" of ARISTOPHANES;
Then I can hum a fugue, of which I've heard the music's din afore,
And whistle all the airs from that confounded nonsense "Pinafore."
Then I can write a washing-bill in Babylonic cuneiform,
And tell you every detail of CARACTACUS'S uniform.
In short, in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral,
I am the very model of a modern Major-Gineral.
In fact, when I know what is meant by "mamelon" and "ravelin,"
When I can tell at sight a Chassepot rifle from a javelin,
When such affairs as SORTIES and surprises I'm more wary at,
And when I know precisely what is meant by Commissariat,
When I have learnt what progress has been made in modern gunnery,
When I know more of tactics than a novice in a nunnery,
In short, when I've a smattering of elementary strategy,
You'll say a better Major-GenerAL has never SAT a gee -
For my military knowledge, though I'm plucky and adventury,
Has only been brought down to the beginning of the century.
But still in learning vegetable, animal, and mineral,
I am the very model of a modern Major-Gineral!
poem by William Schwenck Gilbert
Submitted by Poetry Lover
Vote! | Copy!
Related quotes
If neither animal nor vegetable you be, then mineral you are.
Grouse Ridge
One feels it here:
The imponderably ancient
Succession of lives,
Rubble of animal vegetable mineral
Tangled in quiet ravines
Or strewn along mountain lakes,
Momentary the green & sentient
Bound the same,
Wind rising and falling,
Ten thousand years.
poem by Craig Steiger
Submitted by Poetry Lover
Vote! | Copy!
When the first flint, the first shell, was shaped into a weapon, that action shaped man. As he molded and complicated his tools, so they molded and complicated him. He became the first scientific animal. And at last, via information theory and great computers, he gained knowledge of all his parts. He formed the Laws of Integration, which reveal all beings as part of a pattern and show them their part in the attern. There is only the pattern; the pattern is all the universe, creator and created.
quote by Brian Aldiss
Submitted by Veronica Serbanoiu
Vote! | Copy!
Those involved in the program are interested in how to use photography, videos, the Internet, film, and anything related to communications and transmission of information in the most up-to-date modern ways.
quote by Major Owens
Submitted by Lucian Velea
Vote! | Copy!
And I will never, ever respond to anybody - man, woman, vegetable, or mineral - who tells me to keep my mouth shut.
quote by Janice Dickinson
Submitted by Lucian Velea
Vote! | Copy!
Return To Waterloo (Demo Recording / Remix)
Look at all the people around me,
Same old faces joining the queue.
For return to waterloo,
Return to waterloo.
Started off this morning as usual,
Checkin out the mail and all the bills to pay.
Maybe something specials gonna happen,
Maybe this is my lucky day.
The forecast says heavy weather,
So take your umbrella just in case.
Will I get away, will I see it through,
On the return to waterloo.
Return to waterloo.
Return to waterloo.
Somehow you feel that the worlds been passin you by.
Cant help thinkin somehow theyre living a lie.
Now Im asking questions, I never thought Id ask them before,
Like "why" or "how" or "what am I doing it for? "
Will I reach my destination,
Or will I get off along the way?
Will I reach my destination?
Will I reach my destination,
Have I stopped or am I only going slow?
Have we got a couple more stations,
Or is this as far as we all go?
The headlines cry out from the papers,
"inflation," "murder," "wars," who really wants to know?
If I return to waterloo,
Itll cost me more in 1992.
Will I get away,
Will I see it through?
And come back home to you,
On the return to waterloo.
song performed by by Kinks
Submitted by Lucian Velea
Vote! | Copy!
Return To Waterloo
Look at all the people around me,
Same old faces joining the queue.
For return to waterloo,
Return to waterloo.
Started off this morning as usual,
Checkin out the mail and all the bills to pay.
Maybe something specials gonna happen,
Maybe this is my lucky day.
The forecast says heavy weather,
So take your umbrella just in case.
Will I get away, will I see it through,
On the return to waterloo.
Return to waterloo.
Return to waterloo.
Somehow you feel that the worlds been passin you by.
Cant help thinkin somehow theyre living a lie.
Now Im asking questions, I never thought Id ask them before,
Like why or how or what am I doing it for?
Will I reach my destination,
Or will I get off along the way?
Will I reach my destination?
Will I reach my destination,
Have I stopped or am I only going slow?
Have we got a couple more stations,
Or is this as far as we all go?
The headlines cry out from the papers,
Inflation, murder, wars, who really wants to know?
If I return to waterloo,
Itll cost me more in 1992.
Will I get away,
Will I see it through?
And come back home to you,
On the return to waterloo.
song performed by by Kinks
Submitted by Lucian Velea
Vote! | Copy!
Animal Boy
Gonna kill and destroy
I'm not an Animal Boy
Why don't they understand
I'm not an ape man
Don't have brain damage
I'm not an a wild savage
Don't push me around
Don't bring my head down
Animal Boy
Animal Boy
Animal Boy
I'm not an imbecile
Don't treat me like an animal
I'm not a creature in the zoo
Don't tell me what to do
Animal Boy
Animal Boy
Animal Boy
You don't know what it's like
You don't know how I feel
I don't have a monkey's brain
I'm not an animal
You can't lock me in a cage
This ain't the Stoneage
Better get out of my way
Someone's gonna have to pay
Animal boy
Animal boy
Animal boy
Animal boy
song performed by by Ramones from Animal Boy
Submitted by Lucian Velea
Vote! | Copy!
Waterloo Sunset
Dirty old river, must you keep rolling
Flowing into the night
People so busy, makes me feel dizzy
Taxi light shines so bright
But I don't need no friends
As long as I gaze on Waterloo sunset
I am in paradise
Every day I look at the world from my window
Chilly, chilly is the evening time
Waterloo sunset's fine
Terry meets Julie at Waterloo Station
Every Friday night
But I am so lazy, don't want to wander
I stay at home at night
But I don't feel afraid
As long as I gaze on Waterloo sunset
I am in paradise
Every day I look at the world from my window
Chilly, chilly is the evening time
Waterloo sunset's fine
Millions of people swarming like flies 'round Waterloo underground
But Terry and Julie cross over the river
Where they feel safe and sound
And they don't need no friends
As long as they gaze on Waterloo sunset
They are in paradise
Waterloo sunset's fine (Waterloo sunset's fine)
Waterloo sunset's fine (Waterloo sunset's fine)
Waterloo sunset's fine (Waterloo sunset's fine)
Waterloo sunset's fine
song performed by by David Bowie
Submitted by Lucian Velea
Vote! | Copy!
Humdrum & Humble
Mistress of the mind
Take me where the air is clean
Ignorance is kind
Emerald and evergreen
30 days september, year of miracle and grief
Through the haze, remember
Youre an animal, not a mineral
And we won the war, lost the battle
Lost the war, won the battle
Won the war, lost the battle
Lost the war
All for the love of the humdrum and humble
Colour for the colourblind
All for the love of the humdrum and humble
Through the human eye
Nature a soul extreme
Nothing seems to die
Pictures in a magazine
Through the maze, precisely
Through the myriad of schemes
With your gaze, entice me
Like an animal, not a mineral
And we won the war, lost the battle
Lost the war, won the battle
Won the war, lost the battle
Lost the war
All for the love of the humdrum and humble
Colour for the colourblind
All for the love of the humdrum and humble
Through the maze, precisely
Through the myriad of schemes
With your gaze, entice me
Like an animal, not a mineral
And we won the war, lost the battle
Lost the war, won the battle
Won the war, lost the battle
Lost the war
All for the love of the humdrum and humble
Colour for the colourblind
All for the love of the humdrum and humble
Rubishing the phillistines
All for the love of the humdrum and humble
song performed by by Tears For Fears
Submitted by Lucian Velea
Vote! | Copy!
A modern theory of knowledge which takes account of the relational as distinct from the merely relative character of all historical knowledge must start with the assumption that there are spheres of thought in which it is impossible to conceive of absolute truth existing independently of the values and position of the subject and unrelated to the social context. Even a god could not formulate a proposition on historical subjects like 2 x 2 = 4, for what is intelligible in history can be formulated only with reference to problems and conceptual constructions which themselves arise in the flux of historical experience.
quote by Karl Mannheim
Submitted by Veronica Serbanoiu
Vote! | Copy!
Modern Dancing
Modern, modern, modern, modern dancing
Modern dancing, modern dancing
Modern dancing, modern
I see you acting modernly with the boys and girls
Exposure breeds discovery in the modern world
The 60's hairdos 90's eyes are just flashing lights
A touch of neon hinting class for the modern night
Modern dancing, modern dancing
Modern dancing, modern dancing
Dancing
Modern dancing, modern dancing
Modern dancing, modern
Mono vision tv face and determined eyes
The clothes are perfect the rips in place just the perfect size
Familiarity breeds contempt but it doesn't show
We've heard the music times before but it still makes you go
Modern dancing, modern dancing
Modern dancing, modern dancing
Modern dancing, dancing
....variations to fade....
song performed by by Men Without Hats
Submitted by Lucian Velea
Vote! | Copy!
CHANGE TRUDEAU'S CHARTER AGAIN May 16th,2011
We should have a better constitution than Trudeau’s Charter,
Written back around the time of President Jimmy Carter,
Times have changed, so we should updat it with proper additions,
More in keeping with what’s missing and our modern conditions.
We should have a competition to see who can get it right,
Then vote for it in a plebiscite and no need to be uptight,
We need binding referendums and death with dignity soon,
We need proportional representation with this opportune.
We the people should have plebiscites on major decisions,
In order to avoid possible major national divisions,
Where controversial High Court decisions can be annulled,
Where their ancient red Santa Clause costumes should be mulled.
poem by James Bredin
Submitted by Poetry Lover
Vote! | Copy!
Animal Fights
Bullfights Dogfights Cockfights...
fewer sadistic humans arrange
animal fights
partly because of
growing consciousness
of animal rights
poem by Saiom Shriver
Submitted by Poetry Lover
Vote! | Copy!
Anyone who has to fight, even with the most modern weapons, against an enemy in complete command of the air, fights like a savage against modern European troops, under the same handicaps and with the same chances of success.
quote by Erwin Rommel
Submitted by Lucian Velea
Vote! | Copy!
Flowers Blum Turnip Red
serious consideration must be taken
of situations
where only a small percentage
of the entire population
believe in a better future
or even
truth
its far easier to lie under a brute
and sweat
I once gave a shit- a quote
black and blue
i slept- hoping rape might undo
what nothing else could
that about does it- a quote
we- a quote
a quote
poem by Abraham Cumming
Submitted by Poetry Lover
Vote! | Copy!
When I want to dissect a modern problem, I actually find many similar problems in ancient days. In fact, without the many outer layers of so-called modern civilization, the themes I find in old stories are more clear-cut. They are so visible and extreme. I am not saying that all historical eras are similar to today. But by using a comprehensible social structure such as we had in the past, it is much easier for me to convey or re-create modern situations.
Kaneto Shindo in Voices from the Japanese Cinema (1975)
Submitted by Simona Enache
Vote! | Copy!
Marathon Man
(eric carmen)
Twenty years with my brain in a book
Tryin to find out who I am
Endless nights and olympian dreams
Of a race I never ran
Someones callin my name
Its the crowd in the stands
Dont know how I became
What I suddenly am
Marathon man, keep a-runnin
Marathon man, keep a-runnin
Ive been searchin so long
But the answer is finally at hand
Im a marathon man
Wind is gone and my heads in a haze
But I must keep up the pace
Got to think about strategy here
If I hope to win the race
Someones callin my name
Its the crowd in the stands
Concentrate on the pain
Put my soul in command
Marathon man, keep a-runnin
Marathon man, keep a-runnin
Ive been searchin so long
But the answer is finally at hand
Im a marathon man
Wasting my youth
Chasing dreams, testing truth
Taking turns being deceived
And deceivin
Bound with a rope
Made of heroes and hope
Till I found nothin left
To believe in
Marathon man, keep a-runnin
Marathon man, keep a-runnin
Ive been searchin so long
But the answer is finally at hand
Im a marathon man
song performed by by Eric Carmen
Submitted by Lucian Velea
Vote! | Copy!
Dragons Teeth.
We know: We’ve seen it all before.
Devastation, desolation
the aftermath of modern war.
Although it shocks us to the core
It recalls to our attention.
We know: we’ve seen it all before.
We have chosen to ignore
Lack of valid information
The aftermath of modern war
To us it’s just another chore
needing little explanation.
We know: We’ve seen it all before
There is no way we can
restore any kind of cultivation.
The after math of modern war.
Still danger lies for evermore
unexploded ammunition.
The aftermath of modern war.
We know: We’ve seen it all before.
Sunday,28 November 2010
http: // blog.myspace.com/poeticpiers
poem by Ivor Or Ivor.e Hogg
Submitted by Poetry Lover
Vote! | Copy!
I died a mineral, and became a plant. I died a plant and rose an animal. I died an animal and I was man. Why should I fear When was I less by dying