Fat Dame in Maine.
You know the fat dame in Maine
Whose husband used to carry a
Gun for the Mob until they banged
Him up for shooting some guy in
The head? Well she rang Eddie the
Other night and said why don’t you
Come over and spend a little time
With me? And Eddie said sorry Honey
But I’m washing my hair then I’m sitting
Down with a JD and going to listen to
Some jazz and maybe get in a take away
And so the fat dame said ok then I’ll
Come over to you and dry your hair
And share the JD and bring a pizza and
Snuggle up close and listen to some jazz
And maybe later we can hit the sack and
Make some hot sex and dig deep into each
Other so Eddie said hang on there Babe
I’ve just now remembered my mother’s
Coming to see my new pad and I’m taking
Her for a bite to eat and maybe take in a
Movie ok the fat dame said then I‘ll stay
Home and drink my booze and watch the
Late night TV and eat some chocs and sit
Sad so well the next day they found her in
Her bathtub throat cut lying in water dead.
poem by Terry Collett
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Related quotes
But Eddie does not make all the decisions. Eddie can listen to reason; Eddie can be swayed or talked in or out of certain things. Eddie allows other people to lead in this band and to have certain roles that are very fundamental to the decision-making process.
quote by Stone Gossard
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Card Swapping
O’Brien brought
cigarette cards
to school
and showed you
what he had
in the playground
and Davis said
who’s the dame?
Veronica Lake
O’ Brien said
holding the card out
between finger and thumb
Sutcliffe took hold of it
and held it close
to his eyes
not bad
he said
you looked over
Sutcliffe’s shoulder
my dad likes her
you said studying
the picture
taking it
from Sutcliffe’s hand
who else you got?
Davis asked
and O’Brien fingered
through the pack
mostly soccer players
and the odd movie star
he said
hey got any Marilyn Monroe?
Sutcliffe said
gazing short-sightedly
at O’Brien’s hands
what’s a matter Eddie
got the hots for her?
Davis laughed
and Sutcliffe pulled
a face
wouldn’t say no
he muttered
wouldn’t say no?
O’Brien said
why Eddie you wouldn’t know
one end of a dame
from the other
you’d end up kissing
the wrong cheeks
Sutcliffe pulled a face
I’ll swap you
for the Veronica Lake
you said
holding it close
to your school jumper
sure
O’Brien said
and you swapped him
with a soccer player
you had three of
and he took it
and tucked it in his pack
and you put Veronica
in your jacket pocket
nice and snug
between the pages
of a jotting book
save and sound
waiting for
your bedtime look.
poem by Terry Collett
Submitted by Poetry Lover
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Eddie The Eunuch
Eddie the eunuch was a weasel
Nasty as an old mans nose
Making believin he was evil
Struttin in his mamas clothes
You know that eddie had a bad connection
Never had a chance to ball
Sleeping in the wrong direction, baby
Dreaming he was ten feet tall
But now eddie the eunuch is a rock and roll critic
Sucking like a super star
Slicker than a shoe-shine
Quicker than a two-time
Eddie what a thang you are
Eddie makes a damn good livin, baby
Putting other people down
Eddie couldnt ever forgive them baby
cause he wasnt jackson browne
song performed by by Kris Kristofferson
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Meeting Across The River
Hey, eddie, can you lend me a few bucks
And tonight can you get us a ride
Gotta make it through the tunnel
Got a meeting with a man on the other side
Hey eddie, this guy, hes the real thing
So if you want to come along
You gotta promise you wont say anything
'cause this guy dont dance
And the words been passed this is our last chance
We gotta stay cool tonight, eddie
'cause man, we got ourselves out on that line
And if we blow this one
They aint gonna be looking for just me this time
And all we gotta do is hold up our end
Here stuff this in your pocket
Itll look like youre carrying a friend
And remember, just dont smile
Change your shirt, 'cause tonight we got style
Well cherry says shes gonna walk
'cause she found out I took her radio and hocked it
But eddie, man, she dont understand
That two grands practically sitting here in my pocket
And tonights gonna be everything that I said
And when I walk through that door
Im just gonna throw that money on the bed
Shell see this time I wasnt just talking
Then Im gonna go out walking
Hey eddie, can you catch us a ride?
song performed by by Bruce Springsteen
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Freddie Said
Freddie's got the dirt on
Everybody on the street
Don't know how he does it
But it isn't too discreet
Everybody says
It always winds up being true
He's got somethin' on everyone
Maybe even you!
Freddie know-oh yeah
Freddie goes-"Oh yeah,
I got the 411 in my head!"
That's what Freddie said
One night Freddie's goin' home
He's had a long, long day
When he see big Eddie
Runnin' out the alleyway
Freddie looks at the shadow
Of a body with a shrug
There's Slapsie layin' deader
Then an ugly fire plug
Freddie know-oh yeah
Freddie goes-"Oh yeah!"
I'll get the 411 to the feds!"
That's what Freddie said
[Talk:]
Personally i don't think that
Was such a wise move on freddie's part
If you see what i'm sayin'
Freddie now has the biggest news
He's ever had
But Eddie knows that Freddie knows
And man, you knows, thats's bad!
'cause next night
Freddie's walking home
Just like he did before
Badda-boom! badda-bang!
Badda-bing!
He won't be blabbin' anymore!
See Eddie said-"oh yeah!
Freddie's dead!-oh yeah
No more the 411 in his head
That's 'cause Freddie's dead
Now you know the skinny
All about the scuttlebutt
And the moral of this story is
To keep your big mouth shutt!
Cause Freddie said-"oh yeah!"
Now Freddie's dead!-oh yeah
I'll keep the 411 in my head!"
That's what Freddie should'a said
song performed by by Barry Manilow
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Not Wanting To Forget
The Modigliani print was on the wall
By the front door. Who’s she? Bridshaw’s
Dame asked, pointing at the print.
It’s a painting by Modigliani, Bridshaw said.
Is he a friend of yours? The dame asked.
Bridshaw pulled a face and said, No, he’s
Dead now. Shame, she replied, stroking
The print, her finger tracing the woman’s
Outline, her tongue hanging out of the side
Of her mouth in concentration. She’s a bit
On the thin side, the dame said, and I don’t
Like the black coat she’s wearing, like some
Darn widow. Bridshaw wanted to get the dame
In bed for sex; the Modigliani print was no
Big deal, he’d bought it in some art shop on
The high street from the guy with the Boston
Tones. Shame he’s dead, the dame said, he
Could have painted me; I would have made
A good model, more meat on me than that
Woman in black, thin as a pole. Bridshaw
Nodded his head, Sure, sure, but you’re too
Late, the guy’s dead, now can we move on,
Get a drink, hit the bed, have sex, and then
A cigarette. Sure, the dame said, moving away
From the Modigliani print, taking the image
Of the woman with her, not wanting to forget.
poem by Terry Collett
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The Gay Farewell
I've never seen
Such a sad queen
As Eddie.
I've seen him raving,
Maybe even in pain,
But never
Weeping like a baby.
On Saturday afternoon
He was really fine to him.
But on Saturday evening,
Oh, well Eddie was so pretty.
But now his boy is leaving.
Hey, boy, you're so young
To be a queen weeping.
You're just a little princess.
Oh, Eddie, don't!
Cause what can I do
But listen to you tell your story?
On Saturday afternoon
He was really fine to him.
But on Saturday evening,
Oh, well Eddie was so pretty.
But now his boy is leaving.
But now his boy is leaving.
But now his boy is leaving him.
Queenie, come home soon!
song performed by by Kate Bush
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Dame Dame Dame (Amor Esta Noche)
El reloj
ya marc medianoche
y otra vez encontr
que tan slo me acompaña la TV
El soplar
de ese viento afuera
vive la deolacin
me oprime con angustia el corazn
No hay mas que soledad
nadie, ni por piedad
Dame, dame, dame
amor esta noche
alguien que me ayude
a las sombras borrar
Dame, dame, dame
amor esta noche
hasta que amanezca
ver el dia aclarar
Tantos hay
con gran suerte y fortuna
todo pueden conseguir
tan distinto a lo que tengo que vivir
Aburrida me encuentro esta noche
y la gran oscuridad
es mi siempre obligada amistad
No hay mas que soledad
nadie, ni por piedad
Dame, dame, dame
amor esta noche
alguien que me ayude
a las sombras borrar
Dame, dame, dame
amor esta noche
hasta que amanezca
ver el dia aclarar
Dame, dame, dame
amor esta noche
Dame, dame, dame
amor esta noche
No hay mas que soledad
nadie, ni por piedad
Dame, dame, dame
amor esta noche
alguien que me ayude
a las sombras borrar
Dame, dame, dame
amor esta noche
hasta que amanezca
ver el dia aclarar
Dame, dame, dame
amor esta noche
alguien que me ayude
a las sombras borrar
Dame, dame, dame
amor esta noche
hasta que amanezca
ver el dia aclarar
song performed by by ABBA
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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I've never met or spoken to David Lee Roth, yet it's rather ironic that even he's saying Eddie's lying about things. I'm saying he's not telling the truth, yet Eddie insists that the two of us are lying! You be the judge.
quote by Sammy Hagar
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Jaleo
I have lived a thousand lives or more
Stolen broken hearts behind closed doors
Seen the seven wonders of the world
And everywhere I go your name is in my soul
Take me back and make it happen
Get on the floor, cause a chain reaction
Dame jaleo leo leo leo leo la
Dame jaleo leo leo leo leo la
No te detengas no me esquives
Dejate llevar
Porque esta noche tu sers mia
Dame jaleo leo leo leo leo la
Dame jaleo leo leo leo leo la
Hypnotize you by the gypsy moon
And if for one night you will be mine
I can feel you underneath my skin
You're the reason for the shape I'm in
On your lips I kiss, it tastes of sin
I wanna take your naked heart into my hands
Atrapado, moribundo
Con esas ganas de bailar contigo
Dame jaleo leo leo leo leo la
Dame jaleo leo leo leo leo la
No te detengas no me esquives
Dejate llevar
Porque esta noche tu sers mia
Dame jaleo leo leo leo leo la
Dame jaleo leo leo leo leo la
Hypnotize you by the gypsy moon
And if for one night you will be mine
Caught me with my hands in the fire
I am trapped in my desire to be with you now
Dame jaleo leo leo leo leo la
Dame jaleo leo leo leo leo la
No te detengas no me esquives
Dejate llevar
Porque esta noche tu sers mia
Dame jaleo leo leo leo leo la
Dame jaleo leo leo leo leo la
Hypnotize you by the gypsy moon
And if for one night you will be mine
song performed by by Ricky Martin
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Down Home
Chicago Green she was the ice cube queen of blue
She got a tip from Aunt Mary, said.(?somebody?) was
in love with you
She was so nieve,, famous for her childlike mind,
I don't believe she ever opened her bedroom venetian blinds
Already Eddie was unsteady on the levee
Down Home
Down Home
Little Willy was Chicago's boyfriend, a local screw
He done kicking trippy hippies in the head with his
hobnail shoes
Already Eddie, pitching for pennies, rockin' for bennies,
wound up in the local hole, without a radio,
And he wrote Aunt Mary said "Momma, it's getting hairy,Down Home."
Well it was late in the morning when Chicago bailed
Eddie on out
Which tripped out Willie, oh man you should've heard
him shout..
Yeah they wandered off somewhere, they couldn't find
their way home.
Any road home
You know I'd really like to take her but you know I
couldn't make her
Down Home.
Down Home, get it in now
Down Home, in the morning
song performed by by Bob Seger
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Dame Amor
(graham russell, michael sherwood, jimmy haun)
No basta pintar un cuadro
Solo de ti mismo
Si los colores son para dos...
Te quiero, te quiero
No basta sonar diamantes
Cuando en tu mano los diamantes
No reflejan un puro amor
Te quiero, te quiero
Caer lentamente, que sensacion!
Como una vez yo a ti le ame
Ahora te amo mas y mas
Dame amor,
Dame amor, dame todo lo que das
Dame tiempo
Y esperanzas
Dame tu corazon
No basta guardar secretos
Secretos con ti mismo
Si la verdad quieres susurrar
Que remos...
Te quiero
Recuerdos...nos llaman
Es esto una realidad
Como una vez yo a ti te ame
Ahora vuelvo a un por mas
Dame amor
Dame amor
Dame todo lo que das
Dame tiempo
Y esperanzas
Dame tu corazon
Dame amor
Dame fuerza
Dame lo que quieras dar
Sin cesar
Y sin fin
Dame todo lo que dos
Sostemne
Ensename
Tomame por completo
Porque nuestros corazones
Se merecen uno al otro
Dame amor
song performed by by Air Supply
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Malachys
Eddie said the beat was wrong
Tom didnt like the tune
The boy with a beard in the corner
Laughed in the middle of a song
He didnt stay very long
Eddie said the lights were low
Tom said the treble was high
The boy with a beard in the corner
Laughed in the middle of a sigh
Dont think we ever even caught his eye
Sometimes I used to find
Id be singing to you
As if you were sitting
At the table by the door
Eddie said a friend of his
Is making it big in l.a.
Ah well everybody down at malachys
Says Im gonna make it someday
Sometimes I used to write
A song for you
As if you were sitting
At the table by the door
Sometimes I used to find
Id be singing to you
As if you were sitting
At the table by the door
song performed by by Indigo Girls
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Eddie Jordan found me all the drives. If I am with Tyrrell today, it is because Eddie was there.
quote by Jean Alesi
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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My Babys In Love With Eddie Vedder
Oh, my baby, my baby she dont want me no more
Ever since she saw his poster in that record store
She says the way he grinds his molars is really sexy
She thinks hes so darn dysfunctional and generation xy
She likes his brooding angst and his wild-eyed stare
Yeah, hes her very favorite slacker multi-millionaire
Well, my babys in love with eddie vedder
Shes all crazy bout that eddie vedder
Once she was mine, but now I better just forget her
cause my babys in love with eddie vedder
Now, every time I see him, well, he looks so grim
I guess it really must suck to be a rock star like him
What a pain in the butt to have so much success
Spending all his time moping and avoiding the press
But my girl cant get enough of his sullen demeanor
Like hes some big tortured genious and Im some kinda wiener
Well, my babys in love with eddie vedder
Shes got a thing for that eddie vedder
Tell me, what can he do that I cant do better
Now my babys in love with
I said I said I said my babys in love with eddie vedder
Head over heels for that eddie vedder
I cant believe it, now shes knitting him a sweater
cause my babys in love with eddie vedder
I knew we were headin for disaster
When she caught me hangin out at the ticketmaster
Now shes got an unrequited adoratioon
For the frustrated, agitated, designated alienated
Spokesman for the disaffected grunge generation
Well, I dont wear doc martens and I dont wear flannel
And I dont boycott the music video channel
And I just cant compete with all that money and fame
But I know two can play at this game
Yeah, well, lets just see how jealous shess get
When I start stalking alanis morissette
Well, mny babys in love with eddie vedder
Shes all crazy bout that eddie vedder
Once she was mine but now I better just forget her
cause my babys in love with
I said I said I said my babys in love with eddie vedder
Whyd she have to fall for that eddie vedder
If she wants to leave me, I guess I better let her
cause my babys in love with eddie vedder
song performed by by Weird Al Yankovic
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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Come On Henry
Come on Henry she said
come up and see me some
time but Henry said sorry
dame but I can't today it's
just not possible the wife's
coming back from the shops
and you know what wives are
like and she said oh come
on Henry that's not stopped
you before climbing the stairs
and knocking my door oh that
was for sugar or was it coffee?
Henry said I cannot recall oh
heck Henry don't be such a bore
you've been to my bed many
times before oh Honey don't
be so with me now I got to be
careful the wife's in a mood
the neighbours are talking they
twitch their curtains and peek
through blinds oh to hell with
them she said they've filthy old
minds oh listen baby maybe
tomorrow when the wife's away
I‘ll come borrow some sugar or
coffee or whatever you like and
share your bed you'll come now
Henry or not come at all the young
dame said oh come on sugar give
me a break let me come another
time and I will bring flowers and
chocolates and love and my body
hot ok she said if you promise me
such I'll cut to a break not for you
or your body but my heart's sake.
poem by Terry Collett
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Evening Out
It all kind of fell into place
the dame’s face
the hair colour
the way she swayed
and the accent
of her voice
seemed to jog
your mind awake
yes she’d been quite a dame
and had been on your arm
at the fair
and you’d had a good time
and she’d laughed
and hugged your arm numb
and you kissed
and walked her home
and she said not to make
too much noise
as her old man was upstairs
and he never seemed to trust
guys she went out with
and how many guys
have you been out with?
You asked
looking up at the window
where no light shone
and she replied
Oh just a few
I’m not a darn hooker you know
I’ve just had a few men
here and there
and you wondered
where the here and there was
and how far did she go
with those guys
and she said
look I’ve only had sex
a couple of times
and that was usually over
in the time it takes
to say hullabaloo
and anyway she said
how about you?
You noticed the light go on
up in the bedroom
and whispered
got to go
your old man’s about
and it was a swell evening
and you’re my fourth dame
this month
and I’ve had sex more times
than you can say hullabaloo
and she stood there and stared
and her jaw dropped
and you walked away
beneath bright stars
and full moon
not a moment too late
not a second too soon.
poem by Terry Collett
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Don't Take Lifts From Dames
Whose car
did you get out of?
Dolly asked.
Some dame
from the bedding department,
you replied.
She’s been bedding you
I suppose? Dolly said.
No, you replied,
she’s seven months pregnant.
So you got her pregnant huh?
Can’t keep your hands
to yourself can you.
I just got a lift home
by her that’s all.
You took off your coat
and went to the sitting room
and poured yourself a drink.
Dolly followed you in.
I found this name
in your pocket book.
A girl’s name.
You recognise it? Eh?
She showed you
the pocket book.
You read the name.
That’s just some dame
whose name I put down
who’s been shoplifting.
So you say.
For all I know
you’re having it off
with her too.
Maybe you’re having all
the dames at the store.
I’m a security guard
not a Casanova, you said.
She went off
out to the kitchen
muttering to herself.
You drained your drink
and poured another.
You could hear her
in the kitchen
slamming down
pots and pans
and cursing the air.
I don’t screw any dames
but you, you said.
You’re my Sweetie pie.
Dolly came back
to the door way
and stared at you.
You mean that?
Sure I do.
Every single word?
Every single word.
I’m your Sweetie pie?
Sure you are.
And you ain’t been sleeping
with no other woman?
No, of course I haven’t.
Never would.
Dolly’s glassy gaze softened.
She pushed back
her hair from her eyes.
Ok Sexy Boy
maybe I believe you.
Maybe you’re telling
me the truth.
Maybe I got you wrong.
She turned and went back
in the kitchen.
You sighed softly.
BUT IF YOU’RE LYING TO ME
I’ll POKE OUT YOUR EYES
she bellowed.
Out in the kitchen
Dolly banged around.
You emptied the glass.
A love was dying.
You could sense it
in your bones and
in the hollow sound.
poem by Terry Collett
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One Day If I Could Spend The Night
One day, perhaps if I could spend the night,
I would stack your hearth with firewood,
and we could sit together, on your couch.
You, your feet tucked under you
and your head against my chest,
me, holding you close to me,
and breathing that faint and lovely
fragrance of your hair.
And we could dine on pizza and red wine,
in the softly glowing firelight,
one day, perhaps, if I could spend the night.
One day, perhaps if I could spend the night,
there would be nothing hurried,
no urgency in either life,
and we could have another glass of wine
and talk, earnestly, of matters serious,
if we felt that way inclined.
Or, we could have that other glass of wine
and laugh at matters impolite,
one day, perhaps, if I could spend the night.
One day, perhaps if I could spend the night,
when we were ready, we would go to bed
and kiss and make unhurried love.
Or, equally unhurried, we would not.
And we would listen to the wind and rain
and kiss and make unhurried love again.
Or, equally unhurried, we would not.
And we would sleep, egg and spoon together,
with each of us at peace.
And everything,
in both our worlds,
would be just right,
one day,
perhaps,
if I could spend the night.
poem by Red O'Mara
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Hot Patootie - Bless My Soul
EDDIE: Whatever happened to Saturday night
When you dressed up sharp and you felt alright
It don't seem the same since cosmic light
Came into my life and I thought I was divine
I used to go for a ride with a chick who'd go
And listen to the music on the radio
A saxaphone was blowing on a rock n roll show
And you climbed in the back and you really had a good time
A good time
ALL: Hot Patootie bless my soul
I really love that rock and roll (repeat four times)
EDDIE: My head used to swim from the perfume I smelt
My hands kind of fumbled with her white plastic belt
I'd taste her baby pink lipstick and thats when I'd melt
And she'd whisper in my ear tonight she really was mine
Get back in the front and put some hair oil on
Buddy Holly was singing his very last song
With your arm around your girl you'd try to sing along.
You felt pretty good cause you'd really had
A good time
ALL: Hot patootie bless my soul
I really love that rock n roll (repeat eight times
song performed by by Meat Loaf
Submitted by Lucian Velea
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